This was it Dean thought to himself, as he buttoned up his freshly ironed shirt. This was the night, he was going to finally, finally kiss his long term crush, his lab partner, best friend and if he were to believe in such things, soul mate. So more than a crush, he was pretty much gone on the boy.
An ideal situation would be a kiss at the end of a date. Maybe after a fancy dinner, or a midnight walk or after going to see a film they'd been dying to see, or even a late night car ride or stuffing their faces at the local diner. Dean's mind wondered and he let himself divulge in the fantasy of holding hands, cuddling on the couch as they marathoned firefly, soft kisses, gentle touches, intimate moments just between them and, he shook his head trying to focus on the job sat hand before more dirty images entered his mind, he couldn't deal with that at the moment.
He's known Cas for 9 years, since Dean moved to town with his brother after moving in with his uncle because his father could no longer cope. They've been best friends for five years, lab partners for two. Dean didn't know when he fell in love. He just knew it was slow and gradual and hit him like a punch in the gut. With each new thing he found out about Cas, added to the list of the things he loved about him, but somewhere along the line, that list changed to reason why he was in love with him. He didn't just love Cas, he like him, he was one of Dean's favourite people, he was kind and generous, caring and loyal, funny in sudden surprising ways and he made Dean happy. No matter how happy Dean was that Cas was in his life, it physically hurt him to have Cas so close but not be able to have him like he wanted. It hurt to hide so much of himself from his best friend, despite the pain it would hurt so much more not to have Cas in his life at all, he even had to catch his breath at the sudden thought.
So yeah a date would have been ideal, more than ideal but he was certain that was out the realm of possibility. At least this way he would be able to have Cas for a moment. One moment that was all he wanted. One moment, one kiss and that memory. That one perfect memory would get him through, he was sure of it. Okay, he also knew it would just break his heart, probably shatter it, but at least when he's old and alone or when he found someone years from now he could settle with, he would have the memory of the lips of the one that got away. He would always have that one perfect heart breaking moment to cling too.
A very good friend of his, Charlie, an awesome nerdy red head, she always seemed to be on the same wave length as him, so it wasn't exactly surprising that she figured it out. She recognised the typical signs of a teenager hopelessly in love, and when they were 16 she confronted him about the gay crisis he was having, recognising the signs from her own sexuality panic the year before. She helped and supported him through and always stood by the assumption he should come clean and tell Cas everything. The last few months she had doubled her efforts, she seemed so sure of herself Dean almost believed her, he desperately wanted to believe her, but Dean was a realist and always stood firm with the 'hell no' response.
The kiss plan, or what she likes to call; 'get idiot one's lips on idiot two's lips right the hell now' plan was Charlie's idea, as was the party the plan evolved around, and Dean was eagerly going along with it. They were 18; it was the perfect age for stupid drunken games. She was determined to get the to kiss one way or another, 'even if it means locking you both in a cupboard', her words ran through Dean's mind as he jogged down the stairs after finally being satisfied with his hair, he smiled knowing that Charlie was completely capable of it, and probably very willing too, if all her moaning about his staring and pining was anything to go by.
It was Friday night and Dean was looking for to letting loose with his friends, Charlie's parties was always a blast, only their small cirle of friends went, which meant no pretence was needed they could all just relax have fun and get drunk. He was riddled with excited nervousness as he waiting for Cas to arrive so they could make the 5 minute walk to Charlie's together.
The party was in full swing by the time they got there; Dean let himself in with the spare key he had for emergencies and was greeted with Jo's loud laughter the moment they entered. She was talking in the kitchen with Becky and Charlie. The boys passed Chuck and Gabriel in the living room, on their way to the kitchen to drop off the alcohol and mixers they brought with them, they were both in the process of taping two cans together, starting their staffs as they raced to be the wizard of the party.
As soon as they entered the kitchen they were greeted by Charlie pushed a shot of vodka into theirs hands, with a huge smile across her face, she also handed another one to the girls and demanded they all join her in a shot.
Three shots later they made themselves real drinks and made their way into the small but cosy living rooms, to join the rest of their friends.
Jo and Charlie sat down on the worn cream leather two seater sofa and started discussing what had to be part of an earlier convosation. Ash was lying on the sofa reading the label of the whiskey he had brought with him, trying to work out exactly how many units of alcohol he has had, and how many he needed to drink to beat his personal best. Becky was on her phone sitting on the arm chair legs over one of the arms, Chuck and Gabriel had finished the latest construction of their staffs, they were both on three now and they seemed to have taken a break from their race to engage in a game of liars dice. This left Dean and Cas standing side by side, still in the door way.
Suddenly Dean was nervous, he knew the plan, well some it, he knew what he was (hopefully) going to get to do by the end of the night, but now he was doubting everything, Cas noticed something was wrong. He laid his head on his shoulder as a sign of comfort, it is a gesture they have done to each other many times, they had always been touchy and hands on with each other, it is something that Dean has always loved but right now, all it has none it set all his nerves on fire again.
He must have been more obvious than he thought because Charlie looked over and shot him a 'get your fucking head in the game' look before turning her attention back to Jo. Thankfully Cas hadn't noticed anything who was quite content just resting he head on Dean's shoulder. After a few moments of siquing himself up in his head he moved to sit on the floor, prompting Cas to remove his head and sit with him.
When settled they smiled to each other and began an easy conversation and nothing in particular, he started to wonder why he was so nervous this was Cas, everything was easy was Cas. It didn't matter what topic they spoke about, most of the time they didn't even need words, because this was Cas, the butterflies in his stomach eased off with this thought as they playfully argued about the better star wars movie, Dean was rightfully and justifiably arguing for empire strike back, whereas Cas likes return of the Jedi.
An hour and three drinks later Charlie deemed that everyone was loose enough to start playing games and as host she demanded they play, no one argued and gathered in a circle.
They started with an old favourite, ring of fire. Charlie lost and had to down the dirty pint, a mixture of wine, cider, whiskey, coke and beer, she did it, like a boss and received loud cheers at her achievement, Dean was very proud.
Dean was drunk, not outrageously so, but drunk enough, he was having fun, felt braver and stronger, the best kind of drunk. Cas too was getting there, an achievement in itself. He was currently resting his head on Dean's shoulder again, this time it wasn't for comfort, it was merely because he wanted too, Dean loved that they touched each other like this just because. made him giddy to think he's the only one that gets Cas like this. In Dean's current state he couldn't help look down at Cas, see the small drunken smile pull across the boys dry lips and think he was utterly adorable and had to resisted the bigger than normal urge to kiss him, seemed almost impossible in that moment to not just claim those lips, which sounded silly because kissing Cas was exactly what his aim was for tonight. He didn't want Cas to know it was intentional though, that he really wanted too and had indeed been dying to for so long. It had to be a kiss where they could joke about it, chalk it up to alcohol and whatever game they were playing, could be one of their stories that told people years from now to show how strong their friendship was that they could kiss and not have it mean anything. With that in mind he knew it was almost time for the plan to come to ahead when the next words out of Charlie's mouth where "truth or dare!"
Everyone cheered at the news of another game, just as Gabriel finished his 8th can and tapped it to the others, finishing his staff, he then proceed to take a plastic Halloween crowd out of his bag and crowed himself 'wizard of the party bitches!' he took a bow twirled and few times and paraded his staff around the room, the laughter didn't die down for at least 5 minutes, but soon the game of truth or dare was underway and the butterflies returned in full force in Dean's stomach.
"Jo, truth or dare?" Dean was a little disappointed that he wasn't asked immediately, he understood why though and it was almost worth it to watch Jo blush at when asked about he first 'experience', she was a cocky girl but private about certain aspect of her life, it was strange for Dean to see such a bold girl blush so much
Chuck then has to swap an item of clothing Gabriel, Charlie has to do a shot out of Cas' belly button, of which Dean couldn't not watch and instantly wished he hadn't.
It was Charlie's turn again, her face broke out into what can only be described as an evil smirk as she caught Dean's eye, this was it Dean thought to himself.
"Dean, truth or dare?" Suddenly it wasn't such a good plan anymore, what if Cas laughed, grimanced or worse just flat out refused and walked away, what if he got his heart broken without the kiss, his stomach dropped and a horrible sickening feeling overwhelmed him.
He was crazy, this was crazy, Charlie was most defiantly crazy, yet despite all the doubts running through his mind, despite the sweaty hands and the knotting in his stomach he still found himself saying, "Dare."
"I dare you to kiss," what was she hesitating? Had the plan changed? did she know something he didn't? did Cas talk to her about someone else? Maybe he had figured out and was repulsed by the idea? "Cas" Charlie finished, "Dean kiss Cas." That smirk firmly in place, turns out she was being dramatic, he should have known.
The boys whole face was aflame, he could feel his skin flush even in his inebriated state.
Everyone was either smiling or sniggering to themselves or each other, everyone but Cas. He didn't know how the other boy took the news because he has yet to look down at him, head still resting on his shoulder. Cas hadn't seemed to have moved a muscle since she said his name, he wasn't sure if that was a good sign or not.
Dean took a swing of his drink, polishing of another cup, swallowing down not only the alcohol but all the nerves too; he looked down to his best friend, to find him blushing almost as much as he was.
"you okay with this?" he asked, surprising himself at how causal he made his voice sound.
Cas in turn shrugged, he agreed! Dean's hear pounding hard and fast, Cas would do it, he was so happy he didn't even allow himself to dwell on the 'Cas doesn't care either way, he doesn't care' thought simmering around somewhere under the alcohol and giddy nervous thoughts threatening to boil over. At least not now, he had better things to think about, like those lips finally being on his.
"okay then" Dean answered back, he quickly glanced around the room to see all eyes on him, it seemed even ash, who had been dozing for the past ten minutes or so had woken up especially to watch them. Cas sat up in preparation, so they were sitting cross legged facing each other. Dean was able to look at Cas probably like this and he looked about as nervous as Dean felt, not knowing what to think of that, he decided to ignore it for now. They sat there for a few moments green gazing into blue, then slowly, painfully slowly, he lent in.
Dean's heart was pounding so hard he could feel his pulse vibrate through his whole body, hands were sweaty and shaky and he was pretty sure this was the worst idea anyone has ever come up with. The boys lips were mere mm's away, Cas let out a slightly shaky breath, when Dean felt the breath on his lips, it sent something shooting around Dean's chest, so close the thought. The tipsy teenagers didn't have the brain function being so close to his best friend like this, if he had he would have saw Cas' shaky breath as nerves and probably have back outm out of fear of forcing Casintpo something he didn't want to do, thankfully that wasn't the Case.
Finally, finally their lips met, he felt Cas' dry, soft lips graze against his own in a gentle slow embrace. Dean's hand found itself caressing the side of Cas' face, fingers grazing the nape of the boys neck. The kiss was slow and full of as many unspoken words as Dean could pour into it. He knew it was time to stop, he knew he had too, to keep the façade that this was all a dare, to stop him from getting carried away and just taking, taking all he could from Cas, climb into his lap and give everything right back. He could feel the pull to turn the soft almost loving and intimate kiss into something more but he couldn't, he really did have to stop. Even though it killed him he pulled back, whimpering at the loss of contact, mind to hazy for him to realise that it was not him that made the noise.
They were still so close, neither of them moving away. He could feel Cas' breath and began to worry the other boy could hear just how hard and fast his heart hammering away at chest. Hand still on his friends face and eyes still closed. The thought that Cas was staring at him feeling awkward made him open them, he found Cas' eyes close too, lips parted slightly and looking so damn beautiful Dean almost leant in again.
Dean moved back in sit previous seating position, as was Cas though a little further away, head no longer on Dean's shoulder. Silence settled between them, it wasn't quite awkward but it was full of, something.
Hope you enjoyed it :)
I wanted to write a quick truth or dare one shot but I wanted to see what would happened after they kissed so I wrote more, next chapter will be uploaded shortly :)