This was partially inspired by "Work" by Jars of Clay. They're a religious band, but I love the song anyways (I think religion is a beautiful concept, but I don't follow any). It's a very… well, it's easily stuck in the head (not quite catchy). I thought the overall theme was very LaviLena (like, Lenalee pouring out her feelings), but they're more of a fire couple than a water couple, if that makes any sense… This is actually a bit old and I've just revamped it… anyways, I'll stop with my rambling now.
"It's not the flames that frighten me, Lavi" she whispered in a rough voice, cracked from extensive crying. "It's the people and the hands outstretched all around me, trying to save me but surrounding me and smothering me until I just can't breathe anymore. I don't need all their pity. I just want to be free. I want to be able to save who I want to save, protect who I want to protect, and not be expected to rescue the rest of the world that I don't know. You understand, don't you Lavi?"
But he didn't. That was what scared him. He should be the one with the dark thoughts, not her. Lenalee was pure; she didn't deserve to feel in such a way, if anyone did, it was him.
And that was when he broke. That was when the feelings and the emotion became too much to bear and he left. He stood up and became the Bookman he was supposed to be. He threw his already far too large heart to the wind and became cold and emotionless, fighting as the observer who only needed to keep humanity alive so history could continue. The fear-stricken face she had turned towards him, the glimmering tear-stained cheeks, would have brought a normal human back. Not Lavi, for he was not an ordinary human; he was a Bookman and he had no heart.
It would take a horrible tragedy to make him realize his mistake. Unfortunately, such a tragedy did occur. And Lavi was the cause. For an ordinary person, her scream, the blood pouring from her stomach, the desperate plea, would have turned them around to tend to her first, but not Lavi, for he was not an ordinary human; he was a Bookman and he had no heart. First priority was the Noah, the annoying Noah who was supposedly Road's father. It was a joy to see yet another Noah up in flames, flesh burned from his bones.
Flames... and at that instant, Lavi's heart flew back to him, smacking him upside the head before shoving itself back into his chest and beating a furious, panicked rhythm. But by then, it had been too late. By her side, he could only realize how foolish it had been to shove away his heart. Lavi was a human, a human with only one life in the middle of a war that could mean humanity's end. Who was he to deny the love of others? Wave after wave of tears poured from his eyes as he apologized for leaving her alone, yet blood still pulsed from her stomach regardless of how much pressure he applied, how many wads of shirt and jacket he twisted against the wound. She was dying and they both knew it. All they could do was hold each other close and whisper how they loved each other, how they wanted to be together forever. And she expired in his arms.
Many had died while Lavi had remained cold and far too many were too die in the future, all because they were expected to save the world. And finally Lavi understood how Lenalee felt. Grabbing another Noah- not quite aware of which one it was (perhaps Lulubell or another unnamed Noah) - he released a seal and let the flames consume him. As finders and exorcists rushed over, screaming, he roughly pushed them away, away along with their cloying, claustrophobic presence. And he clutched Lenalee's body to his chest and embraced the flame.