Authors Note: Hey. This is a little Crack-fic I found while exploring my Gaiaonline account. It's something my friend and I made and had fun with a couple years ago… The grammar is sloppy, though. It was kinda cool, I laughed and found out something that I care not to tell any living soul, only Dragon of Twilight knows the secret…Oh, and Icy is the friend I was talking about. and edited for horrible grammar. I just wish I had the pics and icons that go to it… and the asterisks... The actions are bold font. Bold italics are scene changes. Well. Enjoy I tried my best..
Kuja: "It's the spandex crue!! They wait for you in the bathhouse..."
Icy: Runs like hell...away
Gai: "Oh, Icy...! Come and sit with the manliest shinobi ever born. We will have fuuuunnnnn!!"
Lee: "Go, Gai sensei!!"
Kuja: "No...! Help! I'm... changing into...the most feared...Lee fan...Girl...!"
Lee: Does the cute face
Icy: hides behind Kakashi and Iruka
Kuja: "Damn it Icy!! They got me tied up..."
Gai: "Come to the straight side..."
Lee: "Sasuke made me straight when I found out he and Naruto were going out..."
Kuja: "They deprive me of Yaoi's..." Cries
Naruto: "Unhand her bushy brows!!"
Lee: "The one I want is Uchiha."
Sasuke: Hides behind Naruto, whom is behind Kakashi and Iruka
Kuja: "Pussies..." Annoyed
Icy: "Go get her Naruto and I'll tie up Sasuke for you nude and put a bow on his head..."
Sasuke: "Lee would like that too much!!" Runs away
Naruto: "Scardy cat!!"
Lee: Gets up and walks slowly towards the group in a Speedo
Naruto: "That's all for me thanks!" Runs with Sasuke
Gai: Has nothing on
Kuja: Getting sick for more than one reason "...Can't look away... Sitting next...to me..."
Icy: Clings to Kakashi "SAVE ME AND IRUKA AND I"LL GET YOU BOOKS BETTER THAN THE ONES YOU LIKE!"
Kakashi: "But Icha Icha Paradisu... We've had wonderful memories together..."
Iruka: "It's time to change your style..."
Kakashi: Looks at Icy then at Iruka. Takes out the book The source of all perverted power!! "Catch!" Throws book to Kuja
Kuja : Catches it and regains strength "Sexy No Jutsu!!" Naked and misty form of Kuja (Long, white hair, blue eyes, small build, pale, has claws, female; not FF9.)
Gai: Stunned
Lee: Looking away
Kuja: Running towards the others "You saved me!!" Hugs Kakashi
Kakashi: Paralyzed
Kuja: Goes in to hug Icy
Icy: "YOU GO GIRL!" Hugs Kuja then does Sexy No Jutsu , nude form of icy with veil over her head "YAY KAKASHI!" Hugs kakashi
Kakashi: Melts into jelly because of all the Sexy No Jutsus
Gaara: Randomly appears to state: (In icon) "Rock Lee… Stole my eyebrows."
Lee: "Oh, ladies...!" Winks hearts
Icy: Hides behind Garra "Kill Lee and Gai and I'll buy you all the muffins in the world..."
Gaara: Seeing Lee in a speedo "Do I have to touch him...?"
Kuja: "If ya want... But just mummify him alive... He's too adorable..." everyone was staring at her
Lee: "I promised myself I wouldn't cry…!"
Gai: "Come back to the spandex side...!"
Kuja: "You can massacre him though..."
Gaara: "But...He's naked.. Not even my sand wants to touch him! No seriously... Do I have to touch Lee...?"
Icy: "As long as you get him to stop winking at me I don't care...and you still have to kill Gai..."
Lee: "But hunnies...!? I love...You..." Winks more hearts
Gaara: "I'll kill Lee first for winking those annoying hearts at decent people... I'll get Temari and Kankuro to kill that Gai freak..."
Lee: "No! My Gai...!" Runs over and glomps Gai
Icy: "Yay!"
Kuja: Huddles together Icy, Gaara, Naruto and Kakashi for a full out war against spandex
Gai: Huddles Lee for counter war
Naruto: Gives Lee an Elmo doll "Here!"
Lee: "Awww... He looks just like me"
Naruto: Laughes
Icy: "Oh and Gaara... Kill elmo too..."
Gaara: "That thing is just... Creepy..."
Lee: Counters with Sexy No Jutsu
Kuja: Creeped out face
Lee: "You cant resist my manliness..."
Icy: covering her eyes "EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW"
Kuja: Uses Magic and Alchemy to turn Lee into an actual girl
Lee: "Noooooooooo!" 'I'm so sexy...' "Noooooooooooooo!!"
Gai: "That's the reason I love you...My Kuja" heart
Kuja: "Kill him! Kill him!!"
Lee: "Yeah, go Gai! Woohoo!!" High fives and changes back to boy
Icy: freezes Gai and Lee into a block of ice
The Ice turns Lee into a super cute chibi.
Kuja: Turns Gaara into a chibi for a brawl
Gai: Just frozen
Icy: Cheers Gaara
Lee: REVENGE OF THE LIVING ROCK!! Opens the fourth gate
Kuja: "Noooooo!!"
Naruto: "Run for your life! It's speedo man!!"
Kuja: "Send in the reinforcements!!"
Naruto with Shadow Clone, Sakura with altar-ego, a line with Chouji, Shikamaru, Shino, Neji, Kankuro and Temari.
Gaara: Half Shukaku form
Icy: grabs her Senbon needles "RUN, FOR I HAVE NEEDLES!"
Lee: Breaks the ice from Gai
Gai: Sets trap for Kakashi… (A boxing glove on a spring gag)
Kuja: Running from the needles "NEEEEEEEDDDDDDLLLLLLEEEEESSSSS!!"
Naruto: throwing stuff
Icy: impales Gai with needles "NOBODY TOUCHS MY KAKASHI!"