Title: Choices and Consequences -Engineering Project 8321A
Author: Stexgirl2000
Category: Romance/Angst with Het/slash
Rating: R (for strong language and sexual situations)
Codes: Tu/R/S with A, T'p
Archive: Permission granted to Luminosity, Warp 5 and Lingusitics Database. Anyone else needs to ask me.
Summary: This is a continuation of Taryn Eve's story Engineering Project 8321A -What are the aftershocks when three people realize that sex can change everything.
Disclaimers: I don't own them, I get no money for them, and nothing that is Star Trek or Enterprise belongs to me. (Darn it!) The only thing that is mine are few characters I made up my little self. This disclaimer stands for all the chapters in this story.
Author's Note: Thanks to Taryn for letting me write this and all of your beta help.
Choices and Consequences - Engineering Project 8321A Part One: Can't Sleep
The Jentiram had been gone three weeks and Trip Tucker still couldn't sleep. Tossing and turning in his bunk, he tried counting sheep, tried to work various engineering calculations in his head and tried some yoga based deep breathing exercises that Natalie had taught him years ago. Nothing worked. Suppressing a sigh, he got out of bed, turned on the light, and stared at his empty quarters.
Trip knew all too well why he couldn't sleep. He missed them, he missed Hoshi and Malcolm. He missed their breathing, he missed the warmth of their bodies, he missed the camaraderie and insight of their conversations together, he missed the sex.
The fact that he missed them had him scared and confused. Trip was not the most introspective person, but he had enough firm self-awareness to be honest with himself. Getting there had taken him awhile. Trip had prowled the ship late at night, trying to find different distractions from his thoughts.
For five days he took to jogging around the ship. Four days later he switched to going to the ship's gym, working on the weight equipment, trying not to think. Then he tried doing sit ups in his quarters for three days, followed by working in engineering and scaring the crap out of the Gamma shift. After being told by Jon to not overwork himself, Trip had gone back to jogging around the ship. Finally, he allowed himself to tease out why he was scared.
Sex was something he was comfortable with and overall he'd always had a "live and let live" philosophy when it came to the sexual preferences of others. But he never dreamed he'd have to expand that tolerance to include himself. He'd always been drawn to Hoshi, both intellectually and sexually. He just never considered that he'd be drawn in the same way towards Malcolm. Not for the first time, Trip wondered if it had been the same for the other two as well.
Since the departure of the Jentiram, things were supposedly back to normal around the ship. Trip knew that was a lie. Of all the senior officers on the Enterprise, he was the easiest to talk to and a lot of the crew confided in him or let gossip float his way. From what he had gathered, he, Malcolm and Hoshi weren't alone in their problem. There was a lot of sexual and personal fall-out from the fourteen days of doubling, tripling and quadrupling up to make room for the refugees. Things were tense all around and no one knew quite what to do about it.
On their last night together, Trip, Hoshi and Malcolm all agreed there was going to be no more "playing with Hoshi." Things would have to go back to the way it was before. They would be friends, comrades, fellow officers -- nothing more. Now things between three of them were awkward and strained. Trip reflected that they should have known it was easier said than done.
Trip had a feeling that Malcolm and Hoshi might be going through the same thing as he. A week before, he'd gotten out of bed and started roaming the ship at 2 a.m. He'd caught a glimpse of Hoshi, tired and drawn in her robe, gripping a mug of something hot as she went into her quarters. Four days later, at 3 a.m., Trip saw Malcolm, jogging the corridors. When their gazes had met, Malcolm looked as closed off and uneasy as he did when Trip first met him.
Pulling on some sweats and a tee-shirt, Trip decided not go jogging, but to go the mess hall and try some hot milk with butter and honey. It had always done the trick for him when he was a kid, making him feel sleepy and comforted. Perhaps tonight it would work for him, but he doubted it.
When he entered the mess hall, it was quiet and empty. Finding a mug, he added milk, honey, and butter and set it in one of the instant warmers by the drinks dispenser. He went and sat by one of the windows, lost in thought. He was startled by the opening of the mess hall doors. Looking up, he saw Hoshi and his heart leapt, then sank.
"Trip, what are you doing here?" Her eyes were darker than usual, red rimmed and he noticed deep circles under her eyes.
"Well, I just couldn't sleep. So, I decided to try my momma's old remedy of hot milk with honey and butter. You?"
Hoshi sat down, cradling her head in her hands. "I couldn't sleep either. I decided to get some tea and see if it would help."
"Yeah, it looks like we're in the same boat, ain't we? Here, have a sip of this, it might just hit the spot."
Hoshi sipped some of Trip's milk and managed a wan smile. Before she could say anything to him, the doors of the mess hall opened once more and Malcolm walked into the room. He stopped short when he saw Trip and Hoshi. His face was blank, but his eyes were cautious, his body stiff.
"Can't sleep Malcolm?" Trip called out. "Come on over and join the club."
Malcolm relaxed, smiled sheepishly and walked over to join them. Pulling over a chair, he sat down with a hard thump. "Yes, I've been having trouble sleeping. I thought I'd try some tea or hot milk."
"Try this hot milk and honey concoction of Trip's. It's good," said Hoshi hesitantly. Trip nodded in agreement and Malcolm took a few sips before handing it back to Trip.
The three of them sat there silently, letting the silence stretch out longer and longer. They avoided looking at each other, Trip looking at the stars, Hoshi looking down at the table and Malcolm looking down at the floor. Finally, Hoshi let out a deep breath and raised her head. Tears were streaming down her face and both men turned to her in shock. Trip exchanged a helpless glance with Malcolm.
"It's all my fault. I ruined our friendships because I wanted to fulfill a fantasy. It wasn't fair of me to pull the two of you into something you weren't expecting..."
Both men simultaneously went to hold her hand. Trip's hand went on the bottom, Hoshi's in the middle, and Malcolm's went on top. Trip looked at Malcolm and spoke first.
"Hoshi, honey, we're all adults here. It's not your fault. Really...," he faultered, not quite knowing what to say.
"I'm the one who started the ball rolling. You and Malcolm wouldn't have done anything if I hadn't acted the way I did." Hoshi began to cry even harder.
Looking at her, Trip's brain finally kicked out something appropriate to come out his mouth. "Hoshi, stop it. Malcolm and I didn't do anything we didn't want to -- hell, we both have wanted you and probably each other since we came aboard the Enterprise. You can't place all the blame on yourself."
Malcolm nodded and raised his free hand to stroke her hair. "Hoshi, and Trip better not hold this against me, he's right. If there's anywhere to place fault at all, Hoshi love, we can blame it on fate and those damned Jentiram. Bloody hell, it was like having a horde of walking, talking dogs come to life."
Trip chuckled and Hoshi gave a rueful smile though her remaining tears. After a moment, she gave a deep sigh.
"I miss you both. I never dreamed I'd miss you both so much. I'm getting less sleep now than I did with the two you on Trip's air mattress." All three shared a small laugh and lapsed into silence once again.
After a few moments, Malcolm cleared his throat. Trip met his eyes questioningly and taking a quick glance, saw Hoshi give Malcolm a little smile of encouragement. "We made a bloody huge mistake thinking that we could all just go back to the way things were before we three became lovers," Malcolm said in subdued tone.
"Now, I wouldn't call the three of us just lovers...," Trip began, but Hoshi cut him off, anger coloring her voice.
"Trip, what other word or words could we use? Sleeping buddies? Fuck friends? Pre-polygamists?"
Giving her a slightly annoyed look, Trip tried again. "Hoshi, if you could please let me finish my damn thought here, I was gonna say that we're not just lovers. We're best friends. The only other person I've ever called that is Jon, but I don't want to sleep with him. I just don't know what to call us. Hell, I really don't know what I want, I just don't want to go on like this..."
"All right then. I hear what the two of you are saying," said Hoshi, her voice low and strained. "Malcolm says we've made a mistake going backwards. You want something more than what we've been living through these past two weeks. You want to know what I want? I want the two of you."
Hoshi stopped and taking a deep breath, leaned over and kissed Trip, and turned to kiss Malcolm. "I've gone over and over it in my head. No matter what you two say, I started this, I'm the one who jumped off the cliff and pulled the two of you with me. And I did that because I was attracted to you both and couldn't choose. I didn't want to choose. I won't choose. And it's not a cop-out. I 've come to realize that I love you both and I want you both."
As Hoshi finished speaking, the look on her face was defiant, challenging and loving all at the same time.
Malcolm looked at them both straight on, his gaze unwavering. "All during the time we were sleeping together, I wondered how the dynamics between us would change. You won't choose between Trip and I? I can live with that. Bloody hell, I'm actually relieved, petrifed...oh, I sound like a stupid git, it's so hard for me to put into words!"
Hoshi leaned into Malcolm, kissing him softly. "I know it is."
Trip threw his head back and laughed. "Hell, Malcolm buddy, I am right there with you. Part of me has missed the two of so much and the other part of me is terrified. I've never been a prude, and don't you two dare make any jokes, but I've never been in this situation before. I mean, Christ Almighty, I never thought I'd ever...I mean, shit! I don't know what the hell to say...love two people as much as..."he trailed off in amazement as he looked at them.
"As much as you love us, " Hoshi finished for him. She leaned forward and kissed him too. Looking at them both, she stood up, removing her hand from theirs. "I love you both. Come to bed with me...and don't worry, I got a new air mattress." She gave them a wicked grin.
Malcolm stood up after her, a lazy smile on his face. "Good, because I am still too old to be considering a career as a contortionist." His face became serious. "Mattress issues aside, dealing with this, this situation isn't going to be easy. There's still so much we haven't thought of or dealt with. And we're probably going to break every fraternization regulation in Starfleet. God knows we're going to have to discreet."
Trip drained the last of his milk and then also stood up. "Malcolm, you can be a pessimistic son-of-bitch, even if you're the bravest of us all. We've already broken all the fraternization regs in the book. Look, I know you're right, but we can deal with this. It'll be okay. So, let's do what Hoshi says and go... to bed." He leered slightly at the two them and they laughed.
"Follow me, boys," said Hoshi in sexy drawl.
"As always, Hoshi love, as always," said Malcolm with amusement.
"Yeah darlin', we'll follow your lead." Trip grinned with anticipation.
As they walked to the door, Trip noticed that Hoshi was in the middle, their hands entwined with hers. He felt more content than he had in weeks.
Author: Stexgirl2000
Category: Romance/Angst with Het/slash
Rating: R (for strong language and sexual situations)
Codes: Tu/R/S with A, T'p
Archive: Permission granted to Luminosity, Warp 5 and Lingusitics Database. Anyone else needs to ask me.
Summary: This is a continuation of Taryn Eve's story Engineering Project 8321A -What are the aftershocks when three people realize that sex can change everything.
Disclaimers: I don't own them, I get no money for them, and nothing that is Star Trek or Enterprise belongs to me. (Darn it!) The only thing that is mine are few characters I made up my little self. This disclaimer stands for all the chapters in this story.
Author's Note: Thanks to Taryn for letting me write this and all of your beta help.
Choices and Consequences - Engineering Project 8321A Part One: Can't Sleep
The Jentiram had been gone three weeks and Trip Tucker still couldn't sleep. Tossing and turning in his bunk, he tried counting sheep, tried to work various engineering calculations in his head and tried some yoga based deep breathing exercises that Natalie had taught him years ago. Nothing worked. Suppressing a sigh, he got out of bed, turned on the light, and stared at his empty quarters.
Trip knew all too well why he couldn't sleep. He missed them, he missed Hoshi and Malcolm. He missed their breathing, he missed the warmth of their bodies, he missed the camaraderie and insight of their conversations together, he missed the sex.
The fact that he missed them had him scared and confused. Trip was not the most introspective person, but he had enough firm self-awareness to be honest with himself. Getting there had taken him awhile. Trip had prowled the ship late at night, trying to find different distractions from his thoughts.
For five days he took to jogging around the ship. Four days later he switched to going to the ship's gym, working on the weight equipment, trying not to think. Then he tried doing sit ups in his quarters for three days, followed by working in engineering and scaring the crap out of the Gamma shift. After being told by Jon to not overwork himself, Trip had gone back to jogging around the ship. Finally, he allowed himself to tease out why he was scared.
Sex was something he was comfortable with and overall he'd always had a "live and let live" philosophy when it came to the sexual preferences of others. But he never dreamed he'd have to expand that tolerance to include himself. He'd always been drawn to Hoshi, both intellectually and sexually. He just never considered that he'd be drawn in the same way towards Malcolm. Not for the first time, Trip wondered if it had been the same for the other two as well.
Since the departure of the Jentiram, things were supposedly back to normal around the ship. Trip knew that was a lie. Of all the senior officers on the Enterprise, he was the easiest to talk to and a lot of the crew confided in him or let gossip float his way. From what he had gathered, he, Malcolm and Hoshi weren't alone in their problem. There was a lot of sexual and personal fall-out from the fourteen days of doubling, tripling and quadrupling up to make room for the refugees. Things were tense all around and no one knew quite what to do about it.
On their last night together, Trip, Hoshi and Malcolm all agreed there was going to be no more "playing with Hoshi." Things would have to go back to the way it was before. They would be friends, comrades, fellow officers -- nothing more. Now things between three of them were awkward and strained. Trip reflected that they should have known it was easier said than done.
Trip had a feeling that Malcolm and Hoshi might be going through the same thing as he. A week before, he'd gotten out of bed and started roaming the ship at 2 a.m. He'd caught a glimpse of Hoshi, tired and drawn in her robe, gripping a mug of something hot as she went into her quarters. Four days later, at 3 a.m., Trip saw Malcolm, jogging the corridors. When their gazes had met, Malcolm looked as closed off and uneasy as he did when Trip first met him.
Pulling on some sweats and a tee-shirt, Trip decided not go jogging, but to go the mess hall and try some hot milk with butter and honey. It had always done the trick for him when he was a kid, making him feel sleepy and comforted. Perhaps tonight it would work for him, but he doubted it.
When he entered the mess hall, it was quiet and empty. Finding a mug, he added milk, honey, and butter and set it in one of the instant warmers by the drinks dispenser. He went and sat by one of the windows, lost in thought. He was startled by the opening of the mess hall doors. Looking up, he saw Hoshi and his heart leapt, then sank.
"Trip, what are you doing here?" Her eyes were darker than usual, red rimmed and he noticed deep circles under her eyes.
"Well, I just couldn't sleep. So, I decided to try my momma's old remedy of hot milk with honey and butter. You?"
Hoshi sat down, cradling her head in her hands. "I couldn't sleep either. I decided to get some tea and see if it would help."
"Yeah, it looks like we're in the same boat, ain't we? Here, have a sip of this, it might just hit the spot."
Hoshi sipped some of Trip's milk and managed a wan smile. Before she could say anything to him, the doors of the mess hall opened once more and Malcolm walked into the room. He stopped short when he saw Trip and Hoshi. His face was blank, but his eyes were cautious, his body stiff.
"Can't sleep Malcolm?" Trip called out. "Come on over and join the club."
Malcolm relaxed, smiled sheepishly and walked over to join them. Pulling over a chair, he sat down with a hard thump. "Yes, I've been having trouble sleeping. I thought I'd try some tea or hot milk."
"Try this hot milk and honey concoction of Trip's. It's good," said Hoshi hesitantly. Trip nodded in agreement and Malcolm took a few sips before handing it back to Trip.
The three of them sat there silently, letting the silence stretch out longer and longer. They avoided looking at each other, Trip looking at the stars, Hoshi looking down at the table and Malcolm looking down at the floor. Finally, Hoshi let out a deep breath and raised her head. Tears were streaming down her face and both men turned to her in shock. Trip exchanged a helpless glance with Malcolm.
"It's all my fault. I ruined our friendships because I wanted to fulfill a fantasy. It wasn't fair of me to pull the two of you into something you weren't expecting..."
Both men simultaneously went to hold her hand. Trip's hand went on the bottom, Hoshi's in the middle, and Malcolm's went on top. Trip looked at Malcolm and spoke first.
"Hoshi, honey, we're all adults here. It's not your fault. Really...," he faultered, not quite knowing what to say.
"I'm the one who started the ball rolling. You and Malcolm wouldn't have done anything if I hadn't acted the way I did." Hoshi began to cry even harder.
Looking at her, Trip's brain finally kicked out something appropriate to come out his mouth. "Hoshi, stop it. Malcolm and I didn't do anything we didn't want to -- hell, we both have wanted you and probably each other since we came aboard the Enterprise. You can't place all the blame on yourself."
Malcolm nodded and raised his free hand to stroke her hair. "Hoshi, and Trip better not hold this against me, he's right. If there's anywhere to place fault at all, Hoshi love, we can blame it on fate and those damned Jentiram. Bloody hell, it was like having a horde of walking, talking dogs come to life."
Trip chuckled and Hoshi gave a rueful smile though her remaining tears. After a moment, she gave a deep sigh.
"I miss you both. I never dreamed I'd miss you both so much. I'm getting less sleep now than I did with the two you on Trip's air mattress." All three shared a small laugh and lapsed into silence once again.
After a few moments, Malcolm cleared his throat. Trip met his eyes questioningly and taking a quick glance, saw Hoshi give Malcolm a little smile of encouragement. "We made a bloody huge mistake thinking that we could all just go back to the way things were before we three became lovers," Malcolm said in subdued tone.
"Now, I wouldn't call the three of us just lovers...," Trip began, but Hoshi cut him off, anger coloring her voice.
"Trip, what other word or words could we use? Sleeping buddies? Fuck friends? Pre-polygamists?"
Giving her a slightly annoyed look, Trip tried again. "Hoshi, if you could please let me finish my damn thought here, I was gonna say that we're not just lovers. We're best friends. The only other person I've ever called that is Jon, but I don't want to sleep with him. I just don't know what to call us. Hell, I really don't know what I want, I just don't want to go on like this..."
"All right then. I hear what the two of you are saying," said Hoshi, her voice low and strained. "Malcolm says we've made a mistake going backwards. You want something more than what we've been living through these past two weeks. You want to know what I want? I want the two of you."
Hoshi stopped and taking a deep breath, leaned over and kissed Trip, and turned to kiss Malcolm. "I've gone over and over it in my head. No matter what you two say, I started this, I'm the one who jumped off the cliff and pulled the two of you with me. And I did that because I was attracted to you both and couldn't choose. I didn't want to choose. I won't choose. And it's not a cop-out. I 've come to realize that I love you both and I want you both."
As Hoshi finished speaking, the look on her face was defiant, challenging and loving all at the same time.
Malcolm looked at them both straight on, his gaze unwavering. "All during the time we were sleeping together, I wondered how the dynamics between us would change. You won't choose between Trip and I? I can live with that. Bloody hell, I'm actually relieved, petrifed...oh, I sound like a stupid git, it's so hard for me to put into words!"
Hoshi leaned into Malcolm, kissing him softly. "I know it is."
Trip threw his head back and laughed. "Hell, Malcolm buddy, I am right there with you. Part of me has missed the two of so much and the other part of me is terrified. I've never been a prude, and don't you two dare make any jokes, but I've never been in this situation before. I mean, Christ Almighty, I never thought I'd ever...I mean, shit! I don't know what the hell to say...love two people as much as..."he trailed off in amazement as he looked at them.
"As much as you love us, " Hoshi finished for him. She leaned forward and kissed him too. Looking at them both, she stood up, removing her hand from theirs. "I love you both. Come to bed with me...and don't worry, I got a new air mattress." She gave them a wicked grin.
Malcolm stood up after her, a lazy smile on his face. "Good, because I am still too old to be considering a career as a contortionist." His face became serious. "Mattress issues aside, dealing with this, this situation isn't going to be easy. There's still so much we haven't thought of or dealt with. And we're probably going to break every fraternization regulation in Starfleet. God knows we're going to have to discreet."
Trip drained the last of his milk and then also stood up. "Malcolm, you can be a pessimistic son-of-bitch, even if you're the bravest of us all. We've already broken all the fraternization regs in the book. Look, I know you're right, but we can deal with this. It'll be okay. So, let's do what Hoshi says and go... to bed." He leered slightly at the two them and they laughed.
"Follow me, boys," said Hoshi in sexy drawl.
"As always, Hoshi love, as always," said Malcolm with amusement.
"Yeah darlin', we'll follow your lead." Trip grinned with anticipation.
As they walked to the door, Trip noticed that Hoshi was in the middle, their hands entwined with hers. He felt more content than he had in weeks.