DISCLAIMER: Sadly, I do not own Wizards of Waverly Place. This fic is my take on the "Baby Cupid" episode, which, if Disney belonged to me, would be queerer than a 3 dollar bill.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: My first Harper/Alex! Yay! I hope you enjoy, I'm excited to try my hand at this pairing. By the way, I was confused when I saw that on TV dot com, Harper's last name is listed as Evans, yet in the "Harper Knows" episode, they say it's Finkle, so I went with that because I don't recall them ever saying Evans on the show. Anyway… please review as you feel compelled! Reviews make me wicked happy (and likely inspire quicker updates!)
"I feel like I'm dreaming," Alex said through a smile before leaning in to steal another kiss from Harper's lips.
A matching smile and blushed cheeks graced Harper's face. "I feel like I'm dreaming, too," she said. "Unless…. I am dreaming. And then I wouldn't really know, and you wouldn't either, because you'd be in the dream - Ow! What was that for?" Harper questioned, examining the red patch of skin on her forearm that Alex just released from her grip.
"Looks like you're not dreaming. Yay!" Alex flirted dangerously, knowing that she probably wouldn't have gotten away with that if she wasn't so damn cute.
Harper raised her eyebrows, knowing, even in her quirkiness, that two could play this game. She smiled and wrapped her arms around her waist, leading Alex to believe that she was reaching in for a simple embrace. Instead, the auburn-haired fashionista seamlessly snaked her hand downward and pinched Alex's ass – hard.
Harper laughed as Alex let out a surprised cry of pain. "Looks like you're not dreaming!" Harper said, mimicking Alex from before.
Alex shot Harper a look, but couldn't conceal her smile. "You're in trouble for that, Finkle," Alex chided playfully, calling Harper by her last name. "Just wait, I'll get you when you least expect it."
"Is it bad that I'm looking forward to that?" Harper smirked almost wickedly.
"Holy crap, she's hot. How am I only realizing this now?" Alex thought to herself, that one sentence encompassing their whole attraction to one another. It crept up on them fast and suddenly, at least the mutual part. Alex had always had random crushes on guys, but they felt more methodical and expected than anything completely genuine. And as far as Harper was concerned, Justin was the only crush she ever spoke of.
On that wavelength, Alex thought it was time to bring up the second in their set of relationship rules, their first being "no telling family" - just yet anyway - rule.
"Well, if you want there to be anything to look forward to, you need to stop flirting with Justin so much," Alex said jovially yet seriously all at once. It ate her alive inside that Harper was so crazy about Justin, and only now did she realize why exactly it did bother her so much.
Harper laughed once again, finding it cute that Alex was jealous even though she knew better not to tease her about it. "Flirting? All I've ever done is act obsessed and as unappealing as possible to make it seem like I like him without him actually going for it."
Alex was now only half-pouting, but still not entirely convinced. "Well, out of all the people to have a pretend crush on, does it have to be my brother?"
"Well, if I can't come right out and say that I like you, shouldn't I at least pretend that I like someone in the Russo family? That way I can have an excuse for having a star-struck smile on my face every time I'm at your house," Harper pulled off with striking poise.
"Okay, that was cute," the tough-exteriored Alex admitted, "Almost cute enough for me to feel better."
Harper gave Alex a sweet kiss on the forehead and an even sweeter kiss on the lips. "I'm sorry," she said sincerely. "What would make you feel better? If I just laid off Justin altogether?"
Alex took a deep breath. "Well, it might look a little suspicious if all of a sudden you leave Justin alone completely, especially if you and I are spending a ton of time together," Alex thought, her biggest fear being her conservative and strict parents suspecting them, "But Justin's too nice to tell you he's not interested, so who knows how long you'll have to keep this up?"
An idea visibly hit Harper as her expression completely changed. "I think I might have an idea."
…InsertBandofStarsThatIndicatesTimePassageHere…
The next day, Alex was working at the sub station, holding what to the naked eye appeared to be a chubby, 8-month-old baby, in one arm. In reality, it was a de-winged cupid, who Alex was stuck with until she could get herself out of her latest mess. She had summoned him to make things right between her mom and dad, who got into another fight about magic, but Max broke his arrow, and Cupid refused to leave until he fulfilled his original purpose. Max and Justin were upstairs furiously trying to repair the broken arrow while Alex tried to blend a 20-pound baby into the ordinary surroundings.
Alex's stress level decreased a little when Harper walked through the front door of the sub station, brandishing a smile and what appeared to be a sweater.
"Hey, you," Alex said, trying to downplay her excitement and affection. "Is that a gift for me?" she asked, referring to the sweater.
Harper pulled the sweater closer to her and out of Alex's reach. "Uh, no, trust me," she then lowered her voice. "This might do the trick in getting Justin to tell me off once and for all."
Alex had a hard time suppressing the jealousy in her voice. "You're going to creep Justin out with a hand-made sweater? How horrible of you," she remarked sarcastically.
"Alex," Harper deadpanned, "It's a sweater made of my hair."
Alex couldn't hide the gag that rose in her throat as she thought of wearing something composed entirely of human hair, even if it was Harper's beautiful hair. "Oh, man!" she exclaimed.
"Yeahhh," Harper said. "Now, if you really want it, I can just give Justin something else."
"Justin's upstairs, he and Max are fixing Cupid's arrow," Alex stated, waving Harper in the other direction. Harper smiled happily and practically skipped in the other direction, so thrilled with herself that she actually came up with a surefire plan.
Moments later, when she saw the horrified look on Justin's face, she knew her plan had worked. She felt it coming when Justin stood up and walked to the center of the room with her, feeling the rejection speech leaving his mouth and knowing that she finally wouldn't have to pretend anymore once Justin finally told her off.
Suddenly, she heard an odd noise, kind of like a paper bag crumpling loudly, and noticed Justin stumble forward slightly. Instantly his eyes changed as if bitten by some kind of a love bug. Or, maybe…
To her left stood Max with a bow and an almost sick look on his face. It then occurred to both of them, making the connection to Cupid, what had just happened as Justin began regaling Harper with sonnet-like words of love and doe-eyed infatuation.
As quickly as that had happened, once again out of the corner of her left eye, Harper saw Alex, wearing a look of hurt, confusion, and most of all, anger. Without warning, she shoved baby Cupid into Harper's arms as she lunged at her brother, shoving him to the ground.
"Leave her alone!" she yelled, raising her fist.
Harper didn't want to speak too soon, but there was a possibility of rule #1 in their relationship rule book being broken sooner than either of them had anticipated.