Content Notice: smut
Disclaimer: Stargate Universe doesn't belong to me.
A/N: 1bill-sookie on LJ asked for a smutty addition to the Chloe/Rush scene in the corridor in "Gauntlet". Part of the dialogue is lifted directly from the episode. AUish because they are in a relationship here.
It took Chloe some time to find Nick at the very end of the corridor. He was clearly frustrated if the way he was tearing out the precious paper pages out of his notebook was any indication. Good thing she had decided to look for him.
"How's it going?" she asked. He turned to her, apparently surprised to find her there.
"Huh? It's not," he replied, walking towards her slowly, paying more attention to the chalk writings than her. Chloe knew Nick didn't do well with failure of any kind. Not being able to come out with a different solution for their situation had to be grating on him.
"For what it's worth," she said, "I went over Eli's numbers. It's true there's not much margin for error, but I think it might just work."
"Yeah, if we're lucky," he bit out, gesturing at the walls. "Destiny is on this path for a reason. We've only strayed from it once and that's what caused all this trouble in the first place."
It was hard to admit even to herself but Chloe was sometimes almost jealous of the way Nick kept going on about Destiny, as much as she tried to tell herself it was foolish to feel that way. Nick felt strongly about the ship and its mission and so did she. It was one of the reasons they were so good together but sometimes... sometimes Nick focused on details too much for her liking.
"But we're not going off the path," she pointed out the obvious. "At least, not for good. We're just skipping part of it."
Slashing across a faulty equation, Nick looked at her with a pained expression.
"Yeah, well that's what bothers me," he spoke as he looked down. "This ship was launched to solve a mystery, not by arriving at some ultimate destination where all the questions are answered at one time, but by accumulating knowledge bit by bit," he explained as he met her eyes again. "If we skip over this galaxy, then who's to say we won't skip over some vital piece of the puzzle?" he asked and then added more quietly, "And then all of this, everything we've been through, could be for nothing."
They were both silent for a moment. He was right but the decision was out of his hands and they both knew it. And then Nick moved again, the quiet moment over.
"There's gotta be a way to defeat them," he spoke quickly as he bent and picked up a piece of chalk. "I just need more time."
"Which we don't have," Chloe said gently as she stepped closer to him. "Look, you're right: if we go into those pods, we're taking a chance. We might miss something, or we might sleep a lot longer than we planned and never see our loved ones again. Or we might never wake up at all. But Destiny will keep going. If we stay and we don't find a way to defeat the drones, we'll all be killed and this ship will be destroyed, and then this really will have all been for nothing."
She had rarely seen him so unhappy as he looked now. But they really didn't have a choice, not in the time they had available.
"Nick," she spoke up as she closed the distance between them, prying the chalk from his fingers. "I know how you feel, trust me, I do, but the choice's been already made."
"Not my choice," he said but his voice sounded resigned and Chloe dropped the chalk and pulled him into an embrace. Everyone wondered how she could stand to be in a relationship with someone like Nick and those who didn't wonder, did question her choice. The truth was, most of the time she didn't know either. What she did know was that she was probably the only one on the ship who truly understood him and vice versa.
"You told me once that you thought everything happens for a reason," she said and felt his arms finally come up around her. "That it was fate that had brought us here and that that belief wasn't just a classic weak-minded response to the overwhelming complexity of the universe."
"I didn't say that fate had brought us here," he argued but she heard the beginning of a smile in his voice.
"You implied it and don't argue semantics with me," she warned before he could protest. "If us being here is fate, couldn't our choosing this path be part of that fate as well?"
"I doubt that," he snorted, letting go of her. "That would mean we have no control over our lives."
"Or maybe the destination is always the same and it's only the path that changes with our choices," she suggested. He looked away, unwilling to concede the point. "Nick, you can't just decide to believe in fate or some higher purpose behind everything only when it suits you. It doesn't work that way. It's all or nothing. Either you believe all the time or not. There's no middle ground."
"And you? Do you believe in fate all the time?" he asked in a sarcastic voice. Chloe smiled. They could spend hours debating fate, whether it existed or not and whether they were controlled by it. But those were merely details, unimportant at this point in time. So Chloe chose a short answer.
"Of course I do," she replied, taking his hand. There were more important things they could be doing, after all. "Now come on. It's getting cold in here."
"That's because the heat was already turned off in this section of the ship," he commented, turning around to stare down the length of the corridor, the walls filled with mostly his handwriting although Chloe could recognize parts she or Eli had worked on, too.
"It'll keep for three years," she said quietly. "And then we'll pick up where we left off."
When he turned to reply to that, she didn't give him a chance. Stretching slightly, she kissed him, her hand squeezing his as she felt him respond.
"What was that for?" he asked once they parted. Chloe smiled.
"Brody and Volker are handling the first group to go into a stasis. No one will miss us for a while. And if something goes wrong..." she fell silent, unwilling to finish the thought.
"A goodbye of sorts," Nick said but she shook her head.
"I prefer to think of it as a good way to spend some time together before we are frozen for years."
Despite her words, Chloe couldn't resist one last look at the corridor. The numbers, symbols and equations had become an integral part of her and she would look forward to coming back to them. But as she had told Nick, they had a short time to themselves before they would take their chance with the stasis pods and she was determined to get as much time together as possible.
She took the lead, heading for their quarters. Moving together actually hadn't changed their routine much since they both tended to spend most of their time elsewhere and only used the room to keep their things in and for sleeping and sex. It was an arrangement that suited them both and it helped to keep the rumours at bay.
The living quarters still had the full life support active and Chloe gladly took off her jacket. She had always liked warmth better than cold. She sat down on the bed to take off her shoes and socks and only then looked up at Nick who was watching her intently.
"What?" she asked.
"Nothing," he replied and moved over to sit next to her toeing off his shoes and socks like her. Chloe pushed him playfully down and straddled him. She brushed his hair off his face and tapped him on his right temple.
"You're still running numbers in there, aren't you?" she accused.
"You can hardly ask me to turn off my brain," he replied. Chloe nodded and leaned down, kissing him.
"True," she conceded. "But I can switch your focus."
She sat up, pulling off her top and bra together, grinning at him. She tugged at the sleeves of his shirts.
"Off," she ordered. He complied, sitting up as he did so. Cradling the back of her head, he pulled her closer for another kiss. And another. Chloe really liked it when they kissed. Nick was intense and thorough in most of the things he did and when his focus shrank just to her...
"Whoa!" she breathed out when they paused to catch their breaths.
"Whoa indeed," he agreed in mock seriousness and Chloe couldn't help but giggle and kiss him again. And then his hands hooked into the waistband of her pants, pushing them down and Chloe climbed off of him to quickly take them off. He undid his belt and then her hands were over his, helping him peel off his jeans and underpants. Both of them naked, they simply looked at each other for a moment, any awkwardness long buried beneath their familiarity with each other.
Then Nick offered his hand and Chloe took it, letting herself be pulled into his arms and up onto the bed next to him. She smiled up at him when he smoothed his hand down her side, across her hip and thigh and pushed a finger slowly against her opening. She shifted a bit to be more comfortable, spreading her legs more as he stroked her slowly in the way he knew she liked.
She stopped him when he moved to go down on her, not in the mood for his game of "keep Chloe on edge until she begs for release". This could very well be their last time together if things went wrong. That wasn't a time for games, no matter how pleasurable. He got the message and moved over her, pushing inside slowly. Chloe arched her back, pulling his head against her collarbone. She felt the soft brush of his beard against her skin and then the languid motions of his tongue. He was moving slowly, taking his time with her and she rocked her hips against him, not in a particular hurry either.
It was slow and gentle and all about perfect and Chloe hoped that this wouldn't be their last time, that it was truly only an indulgence and not a goodbye. They were taking their chance but it was because not doing anything would be that much worse.
Nick's hand on her face brought her back to the present and Chloe gave up on thinking and just gave over to the feelings coursing through her. They moved together more quickly now, familiar with each other's bodies and it wasn't long before Chloe shuddered in release, with Nick following soon after. They stayed pressed tightly against each other, catching their breaths.
"Three years," Nick said suddenly and Chloe lifted her head a bit to look at him. "We'll settle the question of whether I truly believe in fate in three years."
Chloe smiled and nodded.
"Sounds good," she said. "I'll look forward to it."