Welcome one, welcome all! 'Must Be Dreaming' shall begin in a moment, but allow me to explain something first. This little ditty contains yaoi, which means 'boy/boy love'. If you're the tiniest bit uncomfortable with that, please turn away. If you're uncomfortable with that concept, and still choose to read this, then I'm terrible sorry. I previously assumed that no one enjoys wasting their own time.
Last weekend, I had the honor of reading Angstreunion and akaisakura's yaoi tales. 'Split Personalitys' and 'The Elevator Up to Hell' inspired the birth of this little project. XD I hope I'm able to do them justice! I am proud to say that this was also inspired by a recent family vacation, which actually took place yesterday. So sit back, relax and enjoy!
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own anything related to Metal Gear Solid. So I'm not on top of the world.
'Borders' is an actual bookstore. I don't claim ownership over it. The Daybreak Promenade, however, isn't real. The same goes for the Firefly Park.
Please note that this story contains MINOR MGS4 spoilers. This story is in NO way connected to 'Papercut'.
Please note that homosexual couples are accepted in this story's environment, so there won't be any mentions of homophobia. Don't like it? Sorry. Thanks for stopping by!
If you're going to submit a review, please don't spend an entire review stating errors on character information. I'm not writing a term paper.
"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep, because reality is finally better than your dreams."
-Dr. Seuss, Writer and Cartoonist (1904-1991)
Three months ago, the world's greatest battle came to an end.
Strife is now an element of the past. The people of this world know only bliss, and the cessation of war brought about their new reality. No longer does an obsession with combat exist. Machines, nano technology and hatred are no longer in the stream of life. Soldiers are no longer being used like rats, thrown out without any regard towards their lives. Families are no longer being forced to wallow in nothingness, facing only the prospect of sunlight. The skies are no longer bleak, actually giving forth rays of sunlight. This world has changed so much since then, and it's all because a certain person brought its war to an end.
One could assume that we've stepped onto a different planet, or we were simply transported to a new state of being. They wouldn't be too far from the mark, considering how different things have become. The end of annihilation has brought about an era of resurgence. The streets aren't torn, ragged with lifeless bodies. The air isn't plagued with the stench of death anymore. Our eyes don't sting from the vehement poison of smoke. We're actually able to live now, and we're happy. I know I've never been happier in my life. Fairy tales are finally coming to life, and I'm living one of them. I always assumed that I'd live my life in sorrow, but reality's finally turning things around.
I am Hal Emmerich. My closest friends referred to me as 'Otacon' during times of battle, but recent events have brought my birth name to the forefront. I have to admit I was a bit of a pessimist during the last war, sometimes believing that the chaos wouldn't end. It didn't help to know that I had been drawn into seemingly endless vortexes in the past. Reality surprised me, though, and brought all of my dreams to life. I've even managed to leave the past behind, coming to terms with everything I committed. It still hurts to acknowledge such a thing, but I've managed to get by. With everything so bright, how I could continue to live in the past? How could I wallow in my own self-pity, when the future is so promising?
Repentance was quickly followed by euphoria. I am alive now, able to face life and all of its treasures. I guess I'm learning what it feels like to have wings. It's easy for me to breathe, I can sleep peacefully at night, and it's not so hard to smile. In the past, those exercises were painfully difficult. My acceptance of the past wasn't the only thing to give me wings, though. The lives of my loved ones have blossomed. Like buds emerging from a cold, arduous winter, they've come to the light.
Following the end of their relationship, Meryl vowed to cut off all ties to her past. She only meant to cut off her past with Dave, and she did just that. The two of them came into contact during the last war, but nothing electric came out of their encounters. Over lunch, Akiba informed me that she wishes to forget everything she experienced with him. Taking my own feelings into consideration, I should be livid at that decision. However, I choose not to immerse myself in scorn any longer. I was angry enough with Naomi. The time for contempt has come to an end. I wasn't myself during that period with Miss Hunter in the first place. Everything just felt...unstable.
So I'm not angry with Mrs. Sasaki. As a matter of fact, I wish her the best. I hope she lives a happy life with her husband.
Akiba told me that Meryl wishes to open up a café. At first I felt that didn't suit her, but then she does enjoy the company of others. She's got the mind of a businesswoman, so operations should run without a hitch. In the meantime, Akiba's fascinated with the idea of building their home. Raising a litter of puppies seems to be in his near future, right along with interior designing. It's odd, picturing him as the 'model housewife', but when you examine their personalities, everything's set up perfectly in the end. Just thinking of their possibilities brings a smile to my face.
Another friend, Jack, has also settled into his new life. Shortly after the war, he was reunited with his lover Rose. The two of them are currently building their own home, with their son Titus intact. Real estate is experiencing titanic explosions of success. Interior design is following suit. The three of them are happily setting up their own home, and can't wait to live in it. In the meantime, they're living in Akiba's home. That may seem like a lot to take on, but their home is large enough for a brigade of bouncy, restless individuals.
Mei Ling decided to travel the world. She's always been excited to see what the world has to offer, and so she's off to eat up everything she can. I just heard from her two days ago, and she told me she's in Rome. She plans on spending an entire year on her travels. When she's finished, she's going to write a book. I'm glad she's so excited about her chosen path. I have a pretty good feeling that she'll find what she's looking for-which is her happy ending. After telling her about recent events in my life, she became jealous. I'm glad she's in such fervent support of my relationship, and I know she'll find a love of her own someday. After all, she is traveling around the world. And she's one of the most beautiful people you could ever wish to meet.
I have adopted Sunny. She is now known as 'Sunny Emmerich', my daughter. I glow whenever I mention that. She's been not only a dear friend, but a caretaker as well. I actually consider her to be two additional things: heroine and soul mate. When I faltered in the face of fear, she actually stood strong. Whenever I cried, she was always there to wipe away my tears. She was the song of hope throughout the war, and my loyal companion. She was overjoyed at my decision to adopt her, and for that, I am glad. I will do my best to give her the life she deserves.
With the end of the war came greater destruction. The world might have settled down, but things hadn't calmed for me. Sunny was there to keep me afloat, and if she hadn't been, I don't know what would have happened. I assume things wouldn't have turned out so bright. I probably would have drowned in my own grief and despair, believing myself to be powerless against anything. I spent those three months tracking down a cure for someone, refusing to just let him go-and she was there for me. She was there, right by my side, without question or complaint. While I was Dave's caretaker, she was my caretaker. Never shedding a tear, never frowning, she held a strong vigil over me.
I'm glad she was there.
The three of us decided to live together following the war. We settled into a quaint little house, far away from the buried memories of devastation. Sunny and I decided to become Dave's caretakers, but that arrangement quickly fell into ashes. Three weeks into our new life, my entire world fell apart. Sunny had to become my guardian, and I lost the ability to think straight. I might have been able to stand on my own two feet, but things were hellish. For three consecutive months. Dave became comatose due to his conditions, and I assumed I'd end up losing him. I should have been grateful, considering he could have easily passed away, but I found it difficult to smile at anything. His comatose state gave me the time I needed, though, and I used it all. I worked assiduously, day and night, without fail. I knew I had to find a cure, no matter what the percentage of success was. If humans had the capability to create destructive technology, then surely one had the power to heal.
Coffee became a close friend. Sunny chided me for drinking so much of it, but I didn't have the stomach to drink anything else. I hardly even ate. I only concentrated on finding an elixir, since Sunny was perfectly capable of caring for herself. I knew that. She knew that, and was only concerned with me. She was optimistic the whole time, believing that I would easily find a cure for her 'Epyon' (the usage of 'Uncle Dave' dropped after I confessed something to her).
I can't bear to recall the details of my research. I can only reconstruct the images of a doting Sunny in my mind, far too weak to handle even the resurgence of a distant past. Even though those horrid times have left us, they're still fresh in my mind. I shiver at the mere mention of them. Luckily, light was at the end of the tunnel. I caught that light and gave it to the one I had fallen in love with, hopelessly trapped in images of a 'happily ever after'.
Sunny injected the self-made cure into his system. It had been created with two purposes in mind: reverse his rapid aging process, and nullify the remaining virus. One purpose was slowly fulfilled, but the other's still lying in wait. The elixir is slowly working through his body, having cleansed the virus. The aging process is slowly being reversed. I made it so his body will revert to the state it was in before Miss Hunter injected FOXDIE into him.
How was I able to accomplish such a feat, you might ask? To tell you the truth, I can hardly remember myself. Everything's still cloudy. I can only tell you that I read a lot of myths concerning 'Shangri-La' and 'Elysium'. Ancient cures of ailments configured into everything as well, but aside from that...that's all I can relay. I'd rather focus on the future, thank you very much.
Following the injection, he slept for four consecutive days. Sunny reminded me of a child waiting for Santa Claus, endlessly excited and optimistic. Both of us could see visible proof my success, even though our beloved patient was fast asleep. He had done nothing but sleep for weeks on end, so there wasn't much difference during those four days. The events that occurred afterwards were joyous. He sat up, opened his eyes, and demanded to be let out of bed! He wasn't any stronger than a twig, mind you, but still had enough energy to demand things. I refused to let him take a step away from his resting place, but Sunny insisted on letting him up. From that point on, he became as fussy as a cat and as curious as a puppy.
His combination of animal mannerisms is adorable.
He didn't mention anything about his comatose state, FOXDIE, the war or even Liquid Snake. He didn't say a word about the last war. He immediately launched into the new world, constantly attached to us and demanding to see everything the new age had to offer. His appetite hasn't changed (he still has the stomach of a flea) but he's much more curious about the world of food. Sunny's been rapturous about cooking for him. That's wonderful to see, especially since crops of all manner have been blooming.
In addition to the previously mentioned events, he even abandoned a longtime habit of his-smoking. He hasn't touched them in I don't know how long! I brought them up once, wondering if he was even interested in them, but he discarded them instantly. In his own special way, he told me they were absolutely useless. 'How did I ever pick up such a crappy habit?', he asked me. 'Those things have got shit piled into them, and you're telling me I used to inhale them? Was I on some type of drug or something?'
Any average human would have launched into Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. After the experiences he went through, I assumed he would have fallen into that ailment. I thought we'd lose him to grief, pain and hellish nightmares. That's not the avenue he took, though. Instead of returning to the past, he practically threw himself into the future. He's only focused on the matter of living, learning everything he can to apparently compensate for the time he lost. I think he acquired some form of amnesia, abandoning every thought of war in favor of life. He clings to only one remnant of the past, and that's his bandana. It's not around his forehead anymore, but tied to his arm. I guess some things will never change.
He's a doting, lovable and loving puppy. He's fiercely attached to Sunny, and she's equally happy to have him near. He refers to her as either 'kid' or 'Sunshine Princess'. He tried to help her in the kitchen once, but that resulted in mass disaster. I assisted Sunny in the extinguishment of flames and the burnt remnants of pancakes. I asked him how he could set pancakes on fire. He glared at me, said cooking wasn't his strong suit, and stormed out of the kitchen. I turned to Sunny for answers, but she merely grinned and giggled. She proceeded to say that his feelings had been hurt, and he was only trying his best. I'm still sorry I asked him about the pancake incident.
I wanted to keep him home for several days, thinking that he was still to weak to even lift a piece of paper, but he was as restless as a hummingbird. He complained about being 'cooped up like a guinea pig', unable to rest until his body demanded sleep. I loved watching him, listening to him, observing him. He reminded me so much of a puppy, always curious about everything around him. He still does, as a matter of fact. I can feel myself glowing right now, just thinking about how adventurous he's been.
I love him.
We started off as friends. I started off as his biggest fan, drowning in endless adoration. I looked up to him as a seed looked up to an oak, always wondering about the epitome of strength. I found him fascinating, and he, in turn, pretended to find me annoying. As time went on, though, those feelings I carried slowly blossomed into greater geysers. I gradually sheathed my cloak as the adoring, faithful 'little brother'. My feelings for him emerged as flowers emerged from a long, restless winter. My esteem for him transcended into something that defies boundaries. I find it hard to describe, but there's this flame within me. I have this impenetrable drive to not only protect him, but hold him in my arms. More than anything, I want to keep him near me. And those facts led me to life's greatest gift: love.
Watching 'Love Hina' made me realize my true self. Sunny and I realized that I had been acting like Naru, who had fallen hopelessly in love with Keitarou. She was in direct denial of her feelings, even though they stared at her in the face. I might not have been allergic to the idea of falling in love, but I was guilty of denial. For I don't know how many days, I misinterpret my feeling as petals of friendship. And so the growth of my heart was stunted. It took five episodes of Naru's denial to realize the truth. Sunny figured everything out long before I did, grinning as soon as I started to play the show.
From that point on, I became a stammering mess. I confessed everything to Sunny first, and then I spoke of my feelings to Dave. That occurred weeks down the road, before his final showdown against Liquid. Did he reciprocate? Much to my heart's delight, he did. He actually asked 'what took you so long?' before he walked out, on his way to what I feared would be his final stand. The conditions of the mission were so dangerous, they placed his fragile life in severe danger. I was still a throbbing mess at that point, but I knew I had to say something. I was in danger of losing someone else I had come to adore.
As soon as I lifted the curses on his body, I fell straight into a fairy tale. Sunny compared me to 'Prince Charming' from both Snow White and Sleeping Beauty. She said I had awakened him from his slumber with true love's kiss, and to this very day, I beam at those words. I feel a little silly, comparing myself to two heroes, but there is truth in her words. I, for once, was the hero of a story. I rescued someone I care for. He's still with me, gracing me with his presence, and we're in love. I love him, and he loves me.
He has attached himself to me. Not in the way he attached himself to Sunny, mind you. Whenever I look upon him, I think of a puppy that was mercilessly abused in the bygone days. He suffered so much at the hands of the world, and now he's attached to someone that's actually willing to not only care for him, but love him. He walks about, studies the world, enchants me and loves me. I, in return, give him all of the love I have. He captivates me, and I'm glad. I'm glad for this love we share.
Whenever he isn't with Sunny, he's with me. He can't bear to be alone. We don't mind his company, though, for we love him very much. Sunny feels like she's caring for a puppy too, but coos over him in a way that's different from mine. She loves him the way a child would love a true puppy, always holding his hand.
I'm glad they've finally come together.
When he's with me, the whole world bounces in my chest. It's almost dizzying to have such happiness in my life. He orders me to teach him about the world, and I do. He tells me he's hungry, and I fix him whatever he wants. He's not an oppressive taskmaster, mind you. His behavior is rather cute. He's a cross between a child and a tiny animal, constantly in need of attention. I wish I could just cuddle the living daylights out of him. He's at his cutest when he just stares at things, wondering about their purpose.
I love him.
4 August 2008.
Our vacation is almost over.
Night has fallen over the Daybreak Promenade. The Daybreak is an outside collection of stores, offering everything anyone could ask for. It's a wonderful place for budding relationships, which is why it has been so popular. Recently, everyone's interested in bringing others together. And so, places like Daybreak were born. All kinds of people have come to witness the magic of this place, bonding with their loved ones all the while.
I have spent the entire day with Dave. We both wanted Sunny to come along, but she insisted on staying with Jack for the day. She said she wished to babysit Titus, but I knew that wasn't her complete explanation. She had something else in mind, and I didn't realize it until hours passed. She wanted the two of us to have some quality time together.
We did.
I fully believe that Dave has attained some form of amnesia. He mentions nothing of any war, his brother, his job as a spy, or even his status as a clone. I mentioned Meryl at one point, and he couldn't register her identity. 'Was she your first?' he asked me, and I shook my head with laughter. I told her that they had been in a relationship together.
He remembered absolutely nothing about their time.
I brought up 'Raiden', hoping for a better response. He was able to remember him, much to my pleasure. I was hoping he didn't forget him, since they had become such strong friends. But that brought something to light.
Dave remembers everyone that made a strong, positive impression on him. As for everything else...well, he pretty much tossed it all into a trash can.
I love him, and he loves me.
Instead of falling into depression, he fell into happiness. And in doing so, he left his nightmares behind.
I'm glad.
It's embarrassing to talk about this, but it's important to me. Our love life experiences surges of electricity every day. This vacation hasn't made things easier for me. I'm always enchanted by his stare, glares and questions. He randomly throws out sexually explicit compliments, then strays to another topic in a flash. At times he'll just stare at me, like a child pleading for a lollipop. Or like a dog wagging his tail.
He's been fascinated with food. He may not have a bigger stomach, but he adores the world of nourishment. A couple of hours ago, we stopped by the Border's bookstore. I bought him a chocolate chip cookie from the café. He insisted on sharing it with me at first, but as soon as he took a piece of it, he decided to have it all for himself. And so I gave up my half, unaware of what would happen next. He took a bite-
-and pretty much spent the next five hours bouncing around.
At first I thought the cookie had been a little too sugary for him. That wasn't the truth. He actually experienced the baker's intentions, and came to life-right before my very eyes.
Everyone else takes the cookies for granted. Even I take them for granted. But Dave took a bite and fell in love. He fell in love with the cookie's sweetness, fell in love with life, and fell into even deeper love with me. And from that point on, he wouldn't stop smiling.
At that point, his birthday began.
'Solid Snake' vanished into the unreachable corners of his memory. 'Dave' came to life, living in the present and dreaming of the future.
Heads turned. Smiles were given to us. Encouragement was passed out to us. Dave wouldn't let go of my hand, and was blissful to see that we were just like any other couple. Over our dinner, he told me this: 'I want to make more memories with you, and they're all going to be like this. We don't have any prior to this day. I want more.'
I think his past is now a blank slate. It's almost as if he had slept through most of his life, trapped in dreams that passed him by. Everything's a black sheet to him when it comes to bygone days. I'm thankful that's he looking towards the future.
I love him, and he loves me.
11:50 pm.
The Firefly Park was reconstructed, right along with many other parks. Families, friends and lovers use the park to come together. They enjoy each other's company as if there's no tomorrow, all the while planning for tomorrow. Dave and I are in the park ourselves, staring up at the starry skies.
We can actually see stars. That wouldn't have happened before the 'resurgence'.
He has become quiet. Several hours ago, the effects of a sugar-laden cookie wore off. He lost the desire to constantly chatter, only using sighs and grunts for verbal communication. Silent communication was executed, which was more than enough for me. I spent the remainder of our day in euphoria, just happy to have him near me-and happy to have him so wound-up about the world.
He didn't fall into a sour mood, mind you. He merely became tired. Which explains our current location: the Firefly Park. He's in my arms, fast asleep.
Right before he closed his eyes, he asked me something. The look on his face didn't belong to Solid Snake, who is no longer with him. It hardly belonged to Dave.
It belonged to a child that had been locked up for years, starving without food, water or light. His voice was no different.
'Can we stay like this? Forever?'
I couldn't speak to him at first, overwhelmed by tears. I eventually answered him, stroking his face. 'You know we will,' I whispered, and he fell asleep. I haven't heard anything from him since. He's here, tucked away into my arms, fast asleep and dreaming.
I'm holding him, gazing at him, loving him.
We'll stay like this. I'll make sure of it. I'll do whatever I can to keep this peace secure.
I don't want 'Solid Snake' to return. I want 'Dave' to stay. I want all of this to stay.
I want him to stay happy. I want him to have the life he deserves.
Before I fall asleep, there's one question I'm going to ponder.
How do I propose to him?
I thought of adding a lemon to the end, but thought against it in the end. How about it? Would anyone like a lemon for another little project? XD