Kneading Flowers
Just a oneshot made out of sheer crack.
This goes out to those typos made that you don't even know exist. No pairings, so put the squealing fangirlishness away.
All errors in Amy Rose's dialogue are supposed to be there.
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It was a typical day on Mobius. Mister Sun (as Cream insisted on calling him) was smiling and dancing in the sky. The Flickies all sang and Shadow would occasionally take the hand-gun laying on the veranda table and fire two shots until the singing stopped. Tails picked flowers from Amy's garden and examined them carefully beneath a compound light microscope. Amy Rose took the loss of her azaleas by sitting across from Shadow with a firm scowl on her face and huffing every few minutes.
"I don't see what he kneads those flowers for, anyway," scoffed Amy to Shadow after his routine two-shot bird removal.
Shadow glanced up from the book he was reading and cocked a brow. He glanced over at Tails and shrugged. "He's examining them under a microscope," said Shadow. He flipped a page and the Flickies began to sing again. BAM! BAM! One tiny blue body fell from the tree and landed on the ground near Tails. The furry fox took no heed of the dead carcass.
Amy, however, seemed to care very much about the well-being of the Flickies in her yard. She pushed back the veranda chair and pointed a finger at him, near yelling, "Oh, you listen two me!"
Shadow paled and his book fell. He swallowed hard and whispered, "Two yous?" He shuddered and his voice returned. "One is enough of you, Amy Rose. Now, if you don't mind, my book..." He leaned down to pick it up.
The only thing between Shadow and his book was Amy's boot, which rested on the spine. "No way," she snarled. "You messed with my garden and now you have to deal with my furry!"
"Owning a furry is illegal," Shadow objected, raising a brow. He glanced over at Tails, who now seemed to notice the scene and was loping over.
"Oh puh-lease!" Amy cried as Tails came under the veranda tent. "He's abusing my flowers and your shooting my birds!"
Tails stopped in his tracks and scratched his head. "Shadow owns a shooting?" He gave Shadow a look of sheer horror. "You killed people!?"
Shadow shook his head and pointed at Amy. "She's making assumptions about my possessions," he replied. "I don't know why..."
Amy glared at Tails, momentarily forgetting her rage with Shadow. Tails had made the error of bringing a fistful of azaleas when he left his work station, and this did not bode well with Miss Rose. "What do you knead my flowers for again?" she snarled.
Tails, unfortunately, had never been online for leisure in his short life. He had no clue that people were at a loss over homophones and proper spelling, so he simply scratched his head and looked at Shadow. Shadow, as we all know, spends most of his time reading, riding around on that ridiculous motorcycle, or angsting over a past that may or may not have existed at all, depending on the endings you got for Shadow the Hedgehog. Shadow is also ignorant of the grammatical apostasy of the Internet, and so our heroes must be baffled by Amy Rose's unintelligible speech.
Amy Rose knew not of her companions' confusion, so she simply took their silence as a hostile action. "You too are getting on my last nerve!" she barked. She picked up Shadow's book and shoved it in his lap. "I don't care why you knead my flowers! I don't care why your shooting my birds! I don't care! Your idiots!"
With that, she went into her house and slammed the door, leaving Tails and Shadow to wonder who their idiots were and how they even attained them in the first place.