The beams of the wooden church cast shadows as tall and sturdy as Roman soldiers as Jack and Kate made their way to the far end of the beach for the burial. Hurley had surprised them all they're not even buried yet! with his outburst, bringing their realities crashing back down to the ground. Yes, Henry was gone and they needed to get him and Walt back, but two of them were dead. Dead. They needed to bury them and put to rest this chapter in their lives before they started another.
And so here they were, trudging through the uneven sand to the church for the ceremony and burial of Ana-Lucia and Libby. The air was unusually chilly that afternoon and the sea spray whipped across their faces, leaving imperceptible lacerations in their wake. They didn't speak as they moved through the heavy, thick air – there were no words needed. They had always shared a special bond, one that didn't require looks, but mere glances or in this case, silence.
Jack reached the makeshift building first, and he stood aside and gestured to Kate to pass by, lowering his head as the weight of the past few days' events weighed on his mind. He had thought it was some cruel joke when he walked into the hatch to find Michael shot in the arm, Ana-Lucia dead, and Libby barely clinging to life. It just looked so surreal under the flourescent lights – Ana-Lucia slumped on the couch in a position he had seen so many television actors take after being shot on shows. He was tempted to run over and shake her, just to get her to wake up haha, fooled you! but his feet wouldn't move. He was stuck.
The actual realization hadn't really set in yet, either. Of course, he knew that Libby and Ana-Lucia were dead in the way that they weren't ever coming back again, but after so many tragedies and so many deaths, nothing fully sinks in. A death is just someone ceasing to exist, to not be there anymore when you're looking for them, for an excuse to tell other people who can't find them. Death was just another everyday occurance to Jack, one that mattered but not enough to keep him lying awake at night. People died, things happened, life went on.
He wasn't even sure if he'd miss her when she was gone.
Her. Always came down to her, didn't it? It's what the best movies were based on – hero fighting the criminal, winning, and inevitably getting the girl. But Kate was so much more than that to Jack. It was almost as if she were another one of his souls, one whose personality came out when he least expected it, tossing out a thought that mirrored his own in such a way that it gave Jack goosebumps. And realizing this made Jack sure of one thing – he would, in fact, miss her when she was gone. How could a person function without half a soul?
Sighing, he left the white curtain Charlie had draped over the entrance to the church fall behind him, crossing the sand in two quick steps to where Kate sat on a log, near the back. He hovered near the end of the log for a moment, watching as the sun shone on her hair and tinted it gold.
"This seat taken?" he asked, his voice sounding oddly harsh in the quiet dusk that settled around them.
"Of course not, Jack," she responded softly, looking up at him and giving him a small smile before removing the hand that rested on the log and placing it in her lap, hands twirling together in nervous motions.
He returned her smile and delicately dropped his bag on the sand floor before he settled on the log next to Kate, their knees touching enough to be seen as a more than friendly action. Kate shifted next to him, pulling away slightly and turning her face to the front of the church, where Eko and Hurley stood together. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, one of the basic rules of science. Jack sighed and ran a hand over his hair, wishing to himself that things could be different between them, less tension. He opened his mouth to say something to Kate, ask her how she's been or something trivial, but he was interrupted by Eko clearing his throat.
"Let us begin," he said as everyone began to quiet down and seat themselves inside the church or just outside of it's invisible walls. "I only knew Ana-Lucia a short time but I am proud to have shared that time with her. She was a police officer and I'm sure she helped many people before she came to this island. She was a good person – compassionate, fair, and kind. May she rest in peace."
He glanced at Hurley, who was staring at the ground, seemingly more interested in counting the number of grains of sand per square inch than of what was going on around him. Eko touched his shoulder lightly and Hurley glanced up sharply, his eyes glazed and unfocused. Jack felt Kate stiffen beside him, and he looked at her out of the corner of his eye, watching as she tilted her head towards the sand and clenched her jaw.
"Libby was…" he hesitated, unsure of what to say in the face of such a tragedy. "Libby was… she was a psychiatrist. Or a psychologist. I can't remember which." He paused and scrunched up his face as he tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill down his cheeks. "Either way, she helped a lot of people. She helped me. She was the first girl who ever…" He trailed off again, one rebel tear streaking its way down his cheek. "She was a great person." He finished, bowing his head and walking quickly through one of the gaps in the logs, disappearing into the jungle to mourn.
Jack heard Kate sigh beside him and he bowed his own head, the thoughts in his mind conflicting as to what he should do, if anything, to help her. He cleared his throat and leaned towards her, bringing his mouth near her ear so he could whisper without being heard.
"Are you oka –" He didn't even finish his question because he suddenly felt a damp weight pressing into his palm and entwining his fingers with someone else's. He looked down and saw Kate's hand in his own, both of them resting on the log between them. Her hand was so small and fragile compared to his large and callused surgeon's hands. He glanced back at her, opening his mouth but shutting it as soon as he saw her, facing towards the front of the church with no emotion on her face except the twitch of her jaw clenching and unclenching. Jack gave her hand a slight squeeze and turned his own attention to the front, seeing Eko once again standing there, but this time, holding a Bible. His thumb grazed the edge, the impossibly thin pages rippling against it before he stopped and flipped it open without even glancing at the page.
"The Lord is my Shepherd," Eko began, closing his eyes and lifting his face to the sun, its light casting eerie shadows under his eyes, making his face resemble a skull. "I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake."
Jack raised his head to see the majority of the survivors standing, some reciting the Psalm along with Eko, some just standing quietly. He heard Charlie's voice in his ear as he continued on.
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me."
Jack cleared his throat and tugged gently on Kate's hand, pulling them to their feet. She leaned against him slightly, their hands still clasped together at their sides.
"Your rod and your staff, they comfort me," Jack whispered with everyone else, feeling Kate's surprised eyes land on his face, but he never faltered, his head rigid as it faced forward, watching the leaves of the trees falter in the breeze.
"You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." Eko paused, opening his eyes and bringing his head down to see that every single person was standing. He smiled slightly at this, before closing the Bible gently in his hands. "Amen."
"Amen," everyone echoed, including Kate, who still clung to Jack's side. Jack and Eko caught each others' eyes over the heads of the crowd and Jack nodded, jerking his head to the left as Eko nodded in response. He turned and, still grasping his Bible, began to tread a path to where Ana-Lucia and Libby laid next to freshly dug graves.
Jack and Kate stood still, still attached by their hands, as everyone filed past them, behind them, in front of them. Finally noticing they were the last ones left and that the others were moving quickly away, Jack tugged on Kate's hand.
"You okay?" he asked softly, his free hand tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She leaned into his touch ever so slightly and nodded, a sad smile on her face. This time she was the one to pull them along, leading the way to where the group stood by the wooden crosses carved with the names of their dead.
"Thank you, Jack," she murmured quietly as they stood at the edge of the group, the setting sun glowing behind them. He smiled at her and held her hand more tightly, bending slightly and kissing the top of her rumpled hair.
"No problem."