A/N: I was playing hints with a group of friends and this idea came to mind.
Beckett couldn't help but laugh at Esposito's terrible impersonation of a cow. They were playing hints at Castle's place. God she missed the team of the 12th precinct. She loved her new job in DC, but it was times like these that she missed the team.
Beckett looked around the room it had taken the whole team a long time to get into a knew rhythm. Beckett changing jobs meant that the 12th did not lose one but two detectives. The job switch had also put serious strain on her and Castle's relationship. After she turned down his proposal she had not seen him for weeks.
Lanie called regularly, gave her updates on what was happening with the boys, but when she asked about Castle Lanie always answered the same. "I'm not sure honey, Javi might have talked to him." She did not offer anymore and Beckett didn't ask for anything more. The boys were no different, offering up no information about Castle. For a long time Beckett wondered if Castle just didn't contact anyone of the 12th or that it was a guy thing.
After seven weeks of being grilled on her new job and a particularly difficult case involving children Beckett found him sitting on the ground near her apartment door. She had frozen in the hallway unsure of what to do.
Castle looked up as he heard footsteps approach. He'd probably had seen every neighbor of her return home, so he was a little surprised when it was finally her getting out of the elevator. She looked tired and thin, he'd realized that in the last year that they had been together he had taken up almost all the cooking. Maybe with her new crazy demanding job she'd no time to make herself dinner. He stood up slowly and looked at her.
"Hey." He whispered, switching his wait from one food to another.
"Hey." She said back as she finally started moving again.
The silence that followed was awkward and full of tension, but not the good kind they were used too. It had never felt like this between them. Not even after that summer he spent in the Hamptons or even after she was shot and completely shut him out. Silently Beckett opened her door and let him in.
Castle looked around her apartment; it was nothing like her New York apartment. There was no color on the walls, the furniture looked like it never had been sit on. Cold, stale, passionless, glacial even. It did not feel like a home, especially not the home of this extraordinary woman.
Beckett looked as his writers eye went around the room, saw his analytic and over imaginary mind draw it's conclusions. His eyes found hers and she could read his opinion in his eyes. Her walls shot up high.
"Why are you here Castle? I don't hear from you for 7 weeks and then suddenly you show up."
The emotions Beckett had been reading into his eyes changed, they were replaced with a fiery anger. The intensity of them made her do a step back, five years ago she would have stood her ground, a little over a year ago it would make her want to do a step forward, the passed year it had made her feel excited seeing him this passionate, but now, that anger didn't seem to expressed to their conversation, their discussion, their argument. No this anger was expressed at her, he was angry at her.
Castle saw her take that step back, saw how her eyes went cold, instead of the fire he usually saw burning within them, with passion for her work, friends and family. The anger inside him dissipated he'd not come here to fight with her. He'd came to apologize. "I'm sorry."
Beckett suddenly felt her resolve buckle. Not sure what he was apologizing for and not sure how she was supposed to react to that.
"I said, whatever happens, whatever you decide. I asked you to marry me." Castle said, breathing out, the sting of her no still fresh, the pain in his heart still present with each breath. Beckett felt herself let out a breath with him, when she did not hear from him after a week she started to doubt herself, started to question if choosing to focus on the job was wrong. Worried that she had lost Castle forever, she'd cried herself to sleep for nights on end.
"I meant what I said, that is what I want and I do not deny that it hurt, that it still hurts that you said no, but that's your decision and I need to respect that. However that does not mean I do not love you anymore, or that you don't love me." He stopped there, he had to take a moment to look into her eyes.
Beckett felt tears prickle at the back of her eyes, the love she felt for this man, the love she thought she might have lost choosing this job, did not know any boundaries. It burned deep within her and even though she had not had him this past seven weeks it was partly what kept her going.
Castle found the confirmation he needed in her eyes and he continued. "I still think we deserve more than what we had, but if that means that to get there I have to settle for what we have now, for now, I'll be willing to do that. I will continue scratching and clawing for every inch you are willing to give me, until one day you're ready."
That was the start of a long and hard journey of rebuilding their relationships, but they worked hard on it. That conversation had been nearly three and a half years ago. Their relationship felt stronger than ever and Beckett couldn't be happier.
"GOAT MILK." Castle yelled and Esposito yelled finally as he'd been trying to get them to guess that stupid hint for over five minutes.
"Well maybe you should have pretended to be a goat instead of a cow, that would have been so much better." Ryan said from his place on the couch.
"Okay my turn." Castle said cheerfully as he picked up a white piece of paper from the bowl. He looked at it frowned and placed in his back pocket of his jeans.
He put up four fingers. "Four words." He dropped three fingers. "First word." He touched his ear. "Sounds as." And pretended to put something in her mouth followed by drinking something.
"Sounds as pill?" Ryan asked and Castle pointed at him.
"Pill, Kill, Rail." Esposito started.
"Will?" Lanie asked and Castle pointed at Lanie before holding up four fingers.
"Fourth word". Castle proceeded by pointing at himself.
"Me." Jenny said quickly, this time Castle pointed at Jenny for giving the correct answer. Then proceeded to hold up two fingers.
"Second word."
Again Castle pointed at himself and then to Beckett. "You?" She asked and he nodded. Then he held up three fingers.
"Third word."
Castle pulled on his ear again and smiled brightly and pointed at himself.
"Sounds ass, happy, joyfull." Ryan guessed, but Castle shook his head and mention with his hand that they needed to continue guessing.
"Jovial, merry." Beckett guessed and Castle pointed at her.
"Sounds as merry." Beckett continued, Lanie and Jenny gasped as they both understood what just happened. Both Esposito and Ryan looked at their partners to figure out why they reacted liked that.
Castle looked as Beckett put the pieces together, saw her mouth slowly form the words in the correct order. 'will you marry me.' His eyes twinkled as he again dropped down on one knee, not saying anything just holding out the ring.
Beckett had been wrong, she could be happier, so she nodded.
A/N: Let me know what you think and let me know if you think Beckett will say yes or no to Castle's proposal on the swings!