It's false, right ?
[6x21] : "You perfectly know that what Henry tells you isn't true, that it's insane, and that magic doesn't exist. But maybe that, in the deep of yourself, there is a part of you that desperately wants to believe that it's real." Emma' thoughts as Henry is trying to make her remember.
When everything begins to go faster, it's a totally normal day, at least according to your point of view. You're painting, a swan, again, even though you don't know why, maybe because it deals with your name, and the thing is that, the swan always was your emblem.
(Your swan is immobile, and can't fly, just as you, because you're not the Saviour any more, you're not one, you never was and that's a thing you always knew.)
Your life is sad and colourless since you're here, and if you have to blame someone, it's you, and also Henry as he made you believe in things that weren't real. But despite that, you just can't do it, as he is your son and you love him, and you just want him to be happy.
(Him also, but he doesn't that he is not doing it well.)
But the thing is that when Henry came to search you in Boston, everything was different, your life was also sad, and you were alone, but at least, when he came, everything changed. You tried with all your forces not to be attached to him, but as Neal did, he finally succeeded to go through your walls and strangely, you accepted it.
But today, you're in the present, in real life, and except Henry you have no family which cares about you, you have nothing and no one.
They say you're crazy, and before, before the asylum, maybe you would have protested, but it seems that now none of this matters. All you want is to see Henry again, and be again sane, and if you have to go through it, right.
But it seems that, apparently, the universe will never agree with your desire, because it doesn't happen that way.
Henry comes again with his deliriums of a curse, and maybe that a new time, you would be ready to believe him, because he believes so much in it that he could convince everybody.
(He already did it, in New York, for some seconds, but that's a thing you don't know.)
He comes back, and brings you back in time, and at that moment your world seems to be destroyed and explode.
(He will explode soon, despite your fear and your efforts to save it, but it will be for the better, don't worry.)
§§§§
The word absurd, that wasn't in your vocabulary any more since you entered in this hospital, comes again at the surface without warning, when Henry tells you that the curse is real and that you really are the Saviour.
You perfectly know that what Henry tells you isn't true, that it's insane, and that magic doesn't exist. But maybe that, in the deep of yourself, there is a part of you that desperately wants to believe that it's real.
The little girl that is still in you, who just wants one thing, be loved and accepted, is here again, and if Fiona wasn't there, so maybe you would listen more carefully to Henry. But the Mayor is here, and Henry and you you don't have more time, and you see him go out with regret.
But Henry is really the son of his mother, and when he comes back with doctor Hooper's pass, it almost doesn't surprise you, you're just afraid that you may be caught.
(In a way, the adventurous in you is almost dead, drugged by all the medicines you take since what seems to be years, or forever.)
You follow him, finally, and you go on this damned roof, and you listen this time your son carefully, and the absurdity of the story he is telling you makes you smile.
(Except that it is not as absurd as it seems, and if you don't believe it, your life and your happy ending will be reduced to ashes.)
If you were in a normal world, you wouldn't have to ask questions to yourself, and your son wouldn't believe in this, and wouldn't tell you that you're the daughter of two fairy tales characters, and that you're married with a pirate.
It makes you laugh, and it's normal, nobody would do it in this situation.
(Except that you may ignore it, but your world has nothing to do with normality, as you, and you're not no one.)
You count for many people, and they are fighting for you, and they are your family, but despite what Henry says, you don't believe it. And why would you do it without any proof ? Who would ?
But, again, a voice comes in you, and there is something and that, that a thing you can't deny ; even though it doesn't make sense.
At first, it's a face, and a look. But there is also a smile ; and a name… but you don't remember.
His name is Killian Jones, and he is your happy ending, and something wakes up in you, not a memory, but you see it, and you can't say you didn't, and even Henry will understand it.
You also see your parents, and maybe that for a second, you do believe to it, except that it's not true, it's not possible, and even if Henry believes to it, you can't.
You blame yourself for not being able to do it, and to be forced to make your son come back in reality, but even if this one is brutal, you have no other choice.
(At least, it's what you think, but in the deep of your heart, you feel there is a problem, that's why you take time before deciding to burn the book.)
And even if there is this strange feeling and disagreeable that screams to you that you shouldn't be doing this, Fiona' manipulation is too strong and you listen to it.
You burn the book without measuring the potential consequences of your action, but strangely when the book opens on the page representing the pirate, you suddenly feel a pain in your heart.
And maybe that it's your body that you should listen, as it instinctively knows that you did a great mistake.
Except that you don't listen to it, and even though you would want to believe to it, you can't, and you finally give up and go.
It's just later, as Gold decides to do what must be done, that you finally remember, and there, you realize that yes, Henry had been right and you instinct was right too.
And all this story is true.