So this is just a one shot. Everyone always comments on how Arizona loves butterflies but no-one has really explained it so I thought I'd give it a go. Here's what I came up with I hope you guys like it :) Review and tell me what you think either way - I don't mind constructive criticism.
I know I have the Price Of Perfection to finish, I just haven't been feeling the wedding scene so I've found it really difficult to write. Thankfully my co-writer is home from the USA now so hopefully I'll be able to post a wedding scene sometime soon!
I own nothing. All belongs to Shonda Rhimes and ABC etc.
Why The Butterflies?
"Shit!" Arizona accidentally let the profanity slip from her lips. Where the hell did I put that concealer? She inwardly yelled at herself. She was Arizona Robbins - a peds god – she could not go to work with a tattoo on show! Oh god what if Calliope sees it? This day was just rapidly getting worse with ever passing second, or so it seemed to Arizona. The tattoo had manifested during a difficult time for Arizona back in high school and they were memories she just did not want to relive, she was proud of the tattoo and what it stood for but some things she wanted to remain unspoken. Ever since she was 18 years old she'd try to forget the reason behind the tattoo, the tattoo was her starting point in a stronger life than she had lived before.
With a quick glance at her watch on her nightstand she realised she was going to be very late for work. THE WATCH! Arizona quickly scrambled over to grab it and slung it on her wrist and clipped it into place right over her tattoo. Now she just had to hope that patient needed life saving surgery or her tattoo would be on show for the hospital to see. In Seattle Grace that would mean that every in the hospital would know within the hour. With that Arizona grabbed an apple and bolted from the apartment grateful Callie had been called in very early that morning.
Arizona had made it through the day so far with no surgeries just a mountain of paper work which meant her watch still stayed firmly on her wrist hiding her little secret from all the nurses. It was lunch and she was sat in the cafeteria waiting for Callie to join her after a knee replacement surgery. She was guiltily fidgeting with the watch while she waited picking at her tray of food wishing the day would be over sooner when Mark dumped his own tray on her table and slouched into a chair.
"Hey Blondie," he said not noticing Arizona's agitated expression.
"Manwhore," Arizona shot back as her form of greeting.
"What's got your panties in a twist today Robbins." Mark of course picked up on Arizona's off mood instantly and had to question and annoy to find out more.
"Nothing." Arizona responded icily giving Mark one of her best evil glares looking down at her lunch and picking at her sandwich hoping he will just drop it.
At that moment Callie joined them at the table with her lunch, breaking the tension between Mark and Arizona. Callie leaned over to give Arizona kiss on the cheek and their hands immediately tangled together.
"Hey baby" Callie said smiling before taking a bite of her lunch.
"Hello to you too," Arizona smiled her first real smile of the day. Calliope always managed to make her feel so much better even when she was trying to keep a secret from her. The trio settled into conversation, well mostly Callie talking to both Arizona and Mark while the two gave each other the occasional glare.
Just as they were finishing up the inevitable happened, the sound of a pager ripped through the air. Everyone looked down to their hips to check their pagers. Arizona groaned, it was her, an emergency patient needed operating on. SHIT! Just what I need today! Fan-freaking-tastic. She thought to herself as she sprinted through the halls to the theatre.
6 Hours Later..
Arizona was just scrubbing out of her surgery, everything had gone very well and the child was going to be just fine, that made Arizona have her perky smile on her face. Dimples and all. Arizona felt two long arms wrap around her waist, she jumped at first but soon realised the familiarity of these arms and leaned into Calliopes embrace, subtly pressing her now bare wrist against herself. It had been covered in surgery but now it was bare for the world to see. Callie started pressing feather light kisses against Arizona's neck in all the places that made her weak at the knees.
"You were amazing in there baby. How about we go and celebrate?" Callie whispered huskily against Arizona's ear sending shivers throughout her body. Her very visible tattoo temporarily forgotten thanks to Calliope she growled and let Callie lead her out of the theatre to the nearest on-call room. As soon as they were in there Callie had Arizona up against the wall while she locked the door so they wouldn't be interrupted. Their lips crashed together, Arizona wrapped her arms around Callie's waist pulling her closer to her body while Callie's hands gripped blonde curls holding Arizona firmly against her. They both pulled apart gasping for air, foreheads resting against one another's. A sexy smirk took it's place of Calliope's face, Arizona knew this meant that she was going to take control, reward her for her work in the OR. To prove her right Callie brought both of Arizona's arms up and held them above her head, so she was unable to reach out and touch, she could only feel. Callie look up to ensure she had a good grip on Arizona to make sure she couldn't escape her grasp. That was when she saw it.
"OMG! YOU HAVE A TATTOO!" Callie gasped! "HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THAT?"
Arizona quickly snatched her wrist away and hid it behind her back, hanging her head knowing she was going to have to explain it for the first time in a very long while.
"Why didn't you tell me about it?" Callie exclaimed.
"It's not a time of my life I like to relive Calliope." Arizona said quietly. Callie's face fell slightly thinking she wouldn't get to hear the story of her sweet (quickly on her way to bad ass) Arizona's tattoo.
"Ok, sweetie, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Even though curiosity was burning inside Callie she wouldn't force Arizona to tell her if she didn't want to.
"If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell anyone. Not Mark. Not anyone. I don't want everyone in this damn hospital to be whispering about it by tomorrow." Arizona gave Callie her best stern look.
"You know I won't tell a soul baby," Callie promised, happy that Arizona was going to explain it to her. Arizona took Callie's hand and led her over to the bed and laid down making Callie lay down too.
"Ok it goes a little something like this,"
Arizona had her best friend, Maddie, over after school. Tonight was the night she was finally going to tell someone beside her family that she was gay. She really hoped Maddie would take it ok, they had been best friends since kindergarten. They were both laid under a blanket on the couch watching a movie when Arizona decided now was the time, before she backed out of doing it."Maddie…"
"Yeah Ari?" Maddie looked over at Arizona to see why she was so hesitant in talking to her. She immediately saw the nerves etched into Arizona's features. "What's wrong?"
"I have something I need to tell you. I really hope that you can accept me and love me for who I am, I just can't keep pretending anymore. Maddie, I'm gay. I like girls." Arizona immediately put her head down not wanting to see Maddie's reaction and awaited her reply. She really hoped she didn't hate her for this.
"So your gay? Like gay gay? Is that why you have that Cindy Crawford poster up in your room?" Maddie laughed and Arizona looked up to see Maddie smiling at her.
"Kinda.. yeah pretty much!" Arizona said shyly not used to being able to talk freely about it.
"I have no idea why you were so worried about telling me that Ari! I still love you, I always will! Now I know we have to score you some hot chick instead of checking out all those dudes!"
Arizona laughed her dimples shining out full force. It felt so good to have it off her chest and for Maddie to take it so well. The rest of the night flew by, Maddie and Arizona said their goodbyes and Arizona went to bed happy.
The next day…
Arizona walked into school her usual beaming self. As she walked down the corridor she noticed some people giving her dirty looks as she walked by. She shrugged them off and kept smiling as she approached her friends - the cheerleaders.
"Hey guys!" Arizona said cheerily. As one everyone turned to face her, sneers on their faces.
"Oh it's you" Katie (the head cheerleader) said dismissively. "You aren't on the squad anymore, we don't have lesbians on our team." Katie continued as if it was the most normal thing in the world to be doing, outing Arizona to everyone and punishing her for something she couldn't help.
"WHAT? HOW DO YOU KNOW? YOU CAN'T DO THAT TO ME!" Arizona yelled horrified as to what was happening. How could this have happened? She'd only told one person beside her family. 'Maddie' she thought, shocked and hurt she ran away from the cheerleaders as fast as she could to the bathroom and hid in a cubicle. She hid in their sobbing when 2 girls entered and stood talking;
"Can you believe Arizona is a lesbian?" One started.
"I know! She always seemed so normal and happy to me! Do you think she came out because she fancies someone here? OMG! She fancies someone! Who do you think it is?"
It went on and on and all Arizona could do was sit and listen to what was being said about her. She sobbed silently in the cubicle until the bell went and the girls were forced to leave the bathroom. How could Maddie have betrayed her like this? She trusted her and was so happy everything had gone well and now her life was falling apart within 24 hours of the words leaving her mouth.
'I am better than this. I can deal with this' Arizona gave herself a mental pep talk and made her way out of the cubicle to clean herself up over the sink, plastering a smile on her face she left the bathroom to get through the rest of the day. She ignored the looks and the quiet whispers wherever she went, keeping her smile in place even as it got more fake and hard to keep in place as the day went on. Not soon enough the bell rang and Arizona was free to leave, she practically ran to her car only to be horrified by what she found. It was covered with spray paint with 'DYKE' and 'LESBIAN' along with other offensive terms covering her paintwork. Holding back the tears the best she could Arizona dived in her car and drove as fast as she could home. She spent the rest of the night scrubbing with sponges and polish and whatever else she could find trying desperately to remove every trace of her day from her car. Finally grateful her parents would not be home until very late.
Her weeks continued like this, with the stares and snide comments wherever she went. Arizona did her best to look happy even though she was dying inside. She could survive the little things but at least once a week someone would find some way to torture her that made it all worse. From notes in class, to being cornered in the corridor, ignored by everyone, things thrown at her in the dinner hall. She tried her best to stay above it all but it was just too depressing. She started pretending to be sick so she wouldn't have to go into school. It was hell; her entire senior year was torture for her. She endured it because she had to and kept thinking about how she would be able to leave it all soon.
College came around and she was finally free, she was moving to study medicine at Harvard. Away from the horrors that Indiana had faced her with for a year of her life. During the first term of college she met Joanne and they hit things off great. She'd turn over a new leaf in her life and she wanted something to remind her of that, how strong she was to overcome such problems and to be proud of herself always because she had nothing to be ashamed off. After some google searches on gay pride she decided to head down to the tattoo shop to have it with her permanently. She chose her wrist because it meant that she could see it easily and look at it in difficult times to remind her that she is stronger than whatever life forces on her and she can always survive.
"So I had a butterfly tattooed on since it's my favourite gay pride symbol and it reminded by that I escaped and was free of the torment and I was better for it at the end of the day." Arizona finished up her story and finally looked at Callie, she'd been avoiding her gaze while she told the story she knew if she saw Callie's reactions she wouldn't be able to continue with her tale.
Callie's eyes were full of tears, "I'm so sorry that happened to you baby, I love you so much. You're my hero you know that baby? You never stop having ways to show your strength and perseverance, you are amazing, you have nothing to be ashamed of at all. Anyone would be lucky if they were just a tiny bit like you. You are the most awesome person I have ever met. I'm lucky to have you. Why did you hide it from me though?" Callie whispered.
"I never really meant to, it just became habit. My professors frowned upon it at med school and I just learnt to cover it up to be professional especially around the children. Parents don't really appreciate it when their child's doctor rolls up with tattoos on their arm. I don't really think about it anymore, it's just covered all the time. Plus you know what gossip is like round here as soon as one person knows the entire hospital knows and there's so many different stories that people pull out of the air. I just don't want to have to hear the whispers and stares again, y'know?" Arizona explained. "I found other ways to express myself, like my scrub cab. People think that's just because I'm perky but it also shows my pride for who I am today."
"Ok baby, but could you do me one favour?"
"Anything for you baby."
"Don't hide it around our apartment anymore, it's a piece of you, your past and what you are today. I love what it says about you. Plus it's kinda hot," Callie said suggestively before pulling Arizona in for a passionate kiss.