A/N: Um... sorry its been so long ppl, i kinda lost the floppy disk this thing was on and couldn't remember nuff to write a new one.... but here it is!! Mwahahaha!!
Disclaimer: I own absolutely no one in this story.
Day Two:
Everyone's in the Great Hall eating breakfast when suddenly...
Zidane: *Bursts into room on fire* AHHHHH!
Professor Snape: Ehehehe.... *Smirks*
Dumbledore: Seveurs, what the heck do you think you're doing?!
Professor Snape: *Puppy dog eyes* Just torching students again, sir...
Dumbledore: Why?! For your own sick amusement?!
Professor Snape: Yeah! *Twitches*
Dumbledore: Well, will you please make sure the sprinkler systems are not activated next time!
Professor Snape: *Twitches* Okay! *Bounces off*
Professor Richards: Hey, that guy is... that guy is like... a kangaroo.... *Passes out*
Ron Weasley: I WOULD ONLY HAVE TO AGREE!!
Professor Manson: Shut... up...
Trent Reznor: Oh! THE COLORS! *Runs into wall*
Professor Manson: Ever since yesterday that guy's been acting like that. Maybe you should check him over for rabies or hemorrhage or something...
Professor Richards: No, I've seen him before. With that hemlock and coke.... GET HIM!! *Runs off*
Professor Manson: There's something incredibly disturbing about that guy...
~In the Kitchens~
Garnet: AHAHAHAHA!! I'VE GOT YOU NOW, MANSON!!
Dobby: This is being Dobby, Miss Garnett-
Garnet: AH! *Lunges with knife*
Winky: *Sighs* Dobby being a bad boy, must be punished for my actions! *Begins bouncing head off walls*
Professor Richards: Hey, I thought this was the loo... okay... I'll just leave you and your double homicides alone and go back... go back... to the... MICK, I'M COMING BACK TO THE BAND!! *Runs away shrieking*
Garnet: Why does it always seem like that guy's about to have a heart attack?
~Outside~
Quina: I FIND YOU! I FIND YOU!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Eiko: *Singing* It's a small world after all...
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Snape: YEEEHAW!!
Quina and Hagrid: Uh? *Look up*
Snape: Pardon me, stranger, but--AHHHHH!!! *Runs off*
Quina: Why he do that?
Hagrid: I don't kno-- AHHHH!! *Runs off too*
Quina: What? What he seeing? *Looks around* AHHHH!
Mr. Rogers: Oh, Won't you be my neighbor?
Quina: Stay away, you evil, gay man! *Makes sign against evil*
Mr. Rogers: HOW DARE YOU MISTAKE ME FOR ROSIE O'DONNELL!!
Quina: No, I say you evil *man*!
Mr. Rogers: Yeah, I know...
~Steiner's Class (Chess)~
Professor Manson: Today class, as you should know, is the begining of the Ozz Fest, so we will be holding a special celebration! Please welcome, demi-Ozzie Osbourne!
Oz from Wizard of Oz walks in: Hey, I'm the f*cking Prince of Darkness!
Professor Manson: Hey! Wrong Oz!
Oz: Uh?
Professor Manson: Trent! Get in here and drag this sad excuse of existance out of here!
Trent Reznore: MWAHAHAHOOOHOOO*Comes out and drags Oz off*
Oz: *Squeaky laugh* Ahahahahaha!
Professor Manson: Okay, now for the REAL Ozzie Osbourne!
Bono shuffles in wearing a long black wig.
Bono Ozzie: `Ey, come see the Ozz Fest. It's great fun for the whole family, and... *Passes out*
Professor Manson: *Sighs* SECURITY! WE'VE HAD A MALFUNCTION WITH THE BOZZIE PROTOTYPEE!
Class: WE WANT OZZIE! WE WANT OZZIE!
Professor Manson: Fine, we'll get the closest thing we can find.
Kuja walks in with a pink feather boa.
Whole Class: NOOOOO!!
Kuja begins to strip.
Whole Class Including Manson and Trent: NOOOOOO!!
Professor Manson: UGH! GET OUT! GET OUT! SEEECUUURITYYYYY!!
Reznor: *Twitching on ground*
Professor Manson: OH GOD, OUR SECURITY SYSTEM IS HAVING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES AGAIN!
Whole Class Including Manson: *Fall to the ground twitching*
~In Some Random Corridor~
Eiko: Gawd, finally that great fat shit spit me out! I thought I'd be trapped in the bowels of hell forever! *Hypnotized voice* And there was so much food...
Draco Malfoy: Hey! Kid! Watch out! *Runs into her then catapults out a window*
Eiko: Hey, bitch! Watch where you're going! You almost knocked me out the window!
Draco: *Crack, crack, BOOM!* Ugh...
Eiko: Serves you right, Slytherin! *Begins to walk again* People around here should learn how to treat a lady...
Brahne who just happened to be sitting on a window sil: You ain't no lady
Eiko: *Gasp* Well you're one to talk, Brahne!
Brahne: Shut up, wo-MAN! *Flies off* Ehehehehe!!
Eiko: How rude! Well if no one here can tell the difference between a lady and a man, why am I so girly?! That's it! From now on I am Man-Eiko!
Eiko: *Runs into Great Hall and tugs on Dumbledore's sleeve* Old man, sir, how do I be a man?
Dumbledore: Wha...? Oh... My... God... THE LITTLE GIRL WANTS TO BE A MAN!!
Eiko: *Glares* If you say... one more word... I swear I will KILL YOU!!!
Dumbledore: Okay...
Eiko: Now, tell me
Dumbledore: Tell you what?
Eiko: How to be a man
Dumbledore: Oh right, well... I guess you have to... *Glances over at Richards* Swear a lot
Eiko: Swear a lot? Like, all the time?
Dumbledore: Uh, yeah...
Eiko: Like how?
Dumbledore: Like, uh... him *Points at Richards* Look at him. He even swears when he's sneezing
Richards: Fuh-fuh...Q!
Dumbledore: See?
Eiko: Oh! Okay! Thanks, KFC Man! You really saved my day!
Dumbledore: *Waves* No problem, little gi- KFC MAN?!
~In the Dungeons~
Professor Snape: HellOOOOOOOOO Class!
Class: HELLOOOOOOOOO, PROFESSOR SNAPE!
Professor Snape: What a lovely day it is. Why don't we all go outside and play!?
Class: YEAH!
Zidane: *Howling* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! *Falls to the ground unconcious due to hyperventalation*
Professor Snape: Now, now, what a troublesome student! *Shadow crosses face* He must be punished.... ehehehehe.....
Class: Ehehehehehe....
Professor Snape: Ehehehehehe....
Class: Ehehehehehe....
Professor Snape: Ehehehehe....
Class: Ehehehehe...
Professor Snape: SHUT UP, ALREADY! GOD, HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?!
*Madame Hooch runs in, flashes, and then runs back out*
Professor Snape: *Totally oblivious of what just happened* Now, for Zidane's punishment!
Class: YAYYY!!!
Professor Snape: *Switches to evil voice*AND YOU'LL HAVE NO PART OF IT!!!
Class: Awww....
Professor Snape: NOW GET OUTSIDE AND PLAY!!
Class: YAYYY!!!
Zidane: Ungh... must... escape... wrath... of... count... chocula...
Professor Snape: *Grins* Tisk, tisk. Not yet, Zidane! *Dark shadow passes face* We're going to have some fun...
Zidane: *Look of horror* NOOOOOO!!!
Professor Snape: *Twitches*
~The Basement~
Garnet: Hey, what's that noise....?
Bono: *Runs in and jumps on table* OOOOH OOOOH!! *Begins singing `Elevation'*
House Elves: *Go into some kind of trance* U...2.......U...2......U...2.....
Garnet: Whoa, how'd you do that?
The Edge: *Shrug*
~Herbology Class~
Professor Richards: Uh...hey, class...
Class: HEY, PROFESSOR RICHARDS!
Professor Richards: *Clutches head in pain* NOOOO!! SO.... LOUD!!!!
Draco Malfoy: *In a wheelchair due to his selfinflicted accident* He must have a really bad hangover, that's not even half as loud as we usally do it!
Professor Richards: *Whithers into a pile on floor*
A man clad in black leather suddenly jumps in.
Bono: Never fear, Bono's here!
~In the Dungeons.... again~
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Professor Snape: Yes, you monsterous fiend of inter-stellar space!!
Zidane But did you have to do... this...?
Zidane is sitting in a bathtub filled to the top with Gilderoy Lockhart action figures.
Professor Snape: ......YES!!!!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHOOOHOO!!!
Professor Snape: *Sits down on ground with a box of Junior Mints*
Zidane: *Long pause* ................ Hey, Professor, can I have one?
Professor Snape: *Pops Junior Mint in mouth and pupils enlarge to four times original size* Mmm...... minty.....
A/N: Mwahaha.... how was that? If i get enough good reviews ill add another chapter...
Disclaimer: I own absolutely no one in this story.
Day Two:
Everyone's in the Great Hall eating breakfast when suddenly...
Zidane: *Bursts into room on fire* AHHHHH!
Professor Snape: Ehehehe.... *Smirks*
Dumbledore: Seveurs, what the heck do you think you're doing?!
Professor Snape: *Puppy dog eyes* Just torching students again, sir...
Dumbledore: Why?! For your own sick amusement?!
Professor Snape: Yeah! *Twitches*
Dumbledore: Well, will you please make sure the sprinkler systems are not activated next time!
Professor Snape: *Twitches* Okay! *Bounces off*
Professor Richards: Hey, that guy is... that guy is like... a kangaroo.... *Passes out*
Ron Weasley: I WOULD ONLY HAVE TO AGREE!!
Professor Manson: Shut... up...
Trent Reznor: Oh! THE COLORS! *Runs into wall*
Professor Manson: Ever since yesterday that guy's been acting like that. Maybe you should check him over for rabies or hemorrhage or something...
Professor Richards: No, I've seen him before. With that hemlock and coke.... GET HIM!! *Runs off*
Professor Manson: There's something incredibly disturbing about that guy...
~In the Kitchens~
Garnet: AHAHAHAHA!! I'VE GOT YOU NOW, MANSON!!
Dobby: This is being Dobby, Miss Garnett-
Garnet: AH! *Lunges with knife*
Winky: *Sighs* Dobby being a bad boy, must be punished for my actions! *Begins bouncing head off walls*
Professor Richards: Hey, I thought this was the loo... okay... I'll just leave you and your double homicides alone and go back... go back... to the... MICK, I'M COMING BACK TO THE BAND!! *Runs away shrieking*
Garnet: Why does it always seem like that guy's about to have a heart attack?
~Outside~
Quina: I FIND YOU! I FIND YOU!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Eiko: *Singing* It's a small world after all...
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Quina: YEEEEEEEES!!
Hagrid: NOOOOOO!!
Snape: YEEEHAW!!
Quina and Hagrid: Uh? *Look up*
Snape: Pardon me, stranger, but--AHHHHH!!! *Runs off*
Quina: Why he do that?
Hagrid: I don't kno-- AHHHH!! *Runs off too*
Quina: What? What he seeing? *Looks around* AHHHH!
Mr. Rogers: Oh, Won't you be my neighbor?
Quina: Stay away, you evil, gay man! *Makes sign against evil*
Mr. Rogers: HOW DARE YOU MISTAKE ME FOR ROSIE O'DONNELL!!
Quina: No, I say you evil *man*!
Mr. Rogers: Yeah, I know...
~Steiner's Class (Chess)~
Professor Manson: Today class, as you should know, is the begining of the Ozz Fest, so we will be holding a special celebration! Please welcome, demi-Ozzie Osbourne!
Oz from Wizard of Oz walks in: Hey, I'm the f*cking Prince of Darkness!
Professor Manson: Hey! Wrong Oz!
Oz: Uh?
Professor Manson: Trent! Get in here and drag this sad excuse of existance out of here!
Trent Reznore: MWAHAHAHOOOHOOO*Comes out and drags Oz off*
Oz: *Squeaky laugh* Ahahahahaha!
Professor Manson: Okay, now for the REAL Ozzie Osbourne!
Bono shuffles in wearing a long black wig.
Bono Ozzie: `Ey, come see the Ozz Fest. It's great fun for the whole family, and... *Passes out*
Professor Manson: *Sighs* SECURITY! WE'VE HAD A MALFUNCTION WITH THE BOZZIE PROTOTYPEE!
Class: WE WANT OZZIE! WE WANT OZZIE!
Professor Manson: Fine, we'll get the closest thing we can find.
Kuja walks in with a pink feather boa.
Whole Class: NOOOOO!!
Kuja begins to strip.
Whole Class Including Manson and Trent: NOOOOOO!!
Professor Manson: UGH! GET OUT! GET OUT! SEEECUUURITYYYYY!!
Reznor: *Twitching on ground*
Professor Manson: OH GOD, OUR SECURITY SYSTEM IS HAVING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES AGAIN!
Whole Class Including Manson: *Fall to the ground twitching*
~In Some Random Corridor~
Eiko: Gawd, finally that great fat shit spit me out! I thought I'd be trapped in the bowels of hell forever! *Hypnotized voice* And there was so much food...
Draco Malfoy: Hey! Kid! Watch out! *Runs into her then catapults out a window*
Eiko: Hey, bitch! Watch where you're going! You almost knocked me out the window!
Draco: *Crack, crack, BOOM!* Ugh...
Eiko: Serves you right, Slytherin! *Begins to walk again* People around here should learn how to treat a lady...
Brahne who just happened to be sitting on a window sil: You ain't no lady
Eiko: *Gasp* Well you're one to talk, Brahne!
Brahne: Shut up, wo-MAN! *Flies off* Ehehehehe!!
Eiko: How rude! Well if no one here can tell the difference between a lady and a man, why am I so girly?! That's it! From now on I am Man-Eiko!
Eiko: *Runs into Great Hall and tugs on Dumbledore's sleeve* Old man, sir, how do I be a man?
Dumbledore: Wha...? Oh... My... God... THE LITTLE GIRL WANTS TO BE A MAN!!
Eiko: *Glares* If you say... one more word... I swear I will KILL YOU!!!
Dumbledore: Okay...
Eiko: Now, tell me
Dumbledore: Tell you what?
Eiko: How to be a man
Dumbledore: Oh right, well... I guess you have to... *Glances over at Richards* Swear a lot
Eiko: Swear a lot? Like, all the time?
Dumbledore: Uh, yeah...
Eiko: Like how?
Dumbledore: Like, uh... him *Points at Richards* Look at him. He even swears when he's sneezing
Richards: Fuh-fuh...Q!
Dumbledore: See?
Eiko: Oh! Okay! Thanks, KFC Man! You really saved my day!
Dumbledore: *Waves* No problem, little gi- KFC MAN?!
~In the Dungeons~
Professor Snape: HellOOOOOOOOO Class!
Class: HELLOOOOOOOOO, PROFESSOR SNAPE!
Professor Snape: What a lovely day it is. Why don't we all go outside and play!?
Class: YEAH!
Zidane: *Howling* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! *Falls to the ground unconcious due to hyperventalation*
Professor Snape: Now, now, what a troublesome student! *Shadow crosses face* He must be punished.... ehehehehe.....
Class: Ehehehehehe....
Professor Snape: Ehehehehehe....
Class: Ehehehehehe....
Professor Snape: Ehehehehe....
Class: Ehehehehe...
Professor Snape: SHUT UP, ALREADY! GOD, HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT?!
*Madame Hooch runs in, flashes, and then runs back out*
Professor Snape: *Totally oblivious of what just happened* Now, for Zidane's punishment!
Class: YAYYY!!!
Professor Snape: *Switches to evil voice*AND YOU'LL HAVE NO PART OF IT!!!
Class: Awww....
Professor Snape: NOW GET OUTSIDE AND PLAY!!
Class: YAYYY!!!
Zidane: Ungh... must... escape... wrath... of... count... chocula...
Professor Snape: *Grins* Tisk, tisk. Not yet, Zidane! *Dark shadow passes face* We're going to have some fun...
Zidane: *Look of horror* NOOOOOO!!!
Professor Snape: *Twitches*
~The Basement~
Garnet: Hey, what's that noise....?
Bono: *Runs in and jumps on table* OOOOH OOOOH!! *Begins singing `Elevation'*
House Elves: *Go into some kind of trance* U...2.......U...2......U...2.....
Garnet: Whoa, how'd you do that?
The Edge: *Shrug*
~Herbology Class~
Professor Richards: Uh...hey, class...
Class: HEY, PROFESSOR RICHARDS!
Professor Richards: *Clutches head in pain* NOOOO!! SO.... LOUD!!!!
Draco Malfoy: *In a wheelchair due to his selfinflicted accident* He must have a really bad hangover, that's not even half as loud as we usally do it!
Professor Richards: *Whithers into a pile on floor*
A man clad in black leather suddenly jumps in.
Bono: Never fear, Bono's here!
~In the Dungeons.... again~
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Professor Snape: Yes, you monsterous fiend of inter-stellar space!!
Zidane But did you have to do... this...?
Zidane is sitting in a bathtub filled to the top with Gilderoy Lockhart action figures.
Professor Snape: ......YES!!!!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHOOOHOO!!!
Professor Snape: *Sits down on ground with a box of Junior Mints*
Zidane: *Long pause* ................ Hey, Professor, can I have one?
Professor Snape: *Pops Junior Mint in mouth and pupils enlarge to four times original size* Mmm...... minty.....
A/N: Mwahaha.... how was that? If i get enough good reviews ill add another chapter...