A/N: This is a companion piece to Just As You Are, which in turn was an expansion of a shorter scene in Cheer Up Danny. Basically, this is a look at the first time that Danny and Lindsay are fully intimate after he is out of the wheelchair. It is told from Lindsay's POV, and has some insight into her feelings and thoughts during the difficult time for the both of them. It's a little bit fluffy, a little bit smutty, and hopefully, a lot enjoyable.
I decided to write this story thanks to the encouragement of Brinchen86, who asked to see these little scenes expanded into their own oneshots. I'm sorry it took me so long... I was kind of dragging my feet, waiting for inspiration to hit. Thanks for your patience, lady! This one's for you.
Disclaimer: Sadly, despite all my cunning plans, Danny and Lindsay still don't belong to me.
Lindsay stepped out of the shower, grabbing a large bath sheet from the towel rack and drying off a bit before wrapping it around herself. She then took a smaller towel from the shelf and bending forward, she wrapped it around her hair, tucking it under at the back so it formed a kind of turban. Stepping forward, she wiped the fog from the mirror and took in her appearance.
With all the stress of the last few months, Lindsay felt that she was looking older, far older than her 31 years. She sighed as she began her nightly skin care regime. As she did so, she listened to her husband and daughter over the baby monitor that was sitting on the bathroom counter. Danny practically glowed with pride at finally being able to take on a simple task like putting his daughter to bed, and seeing him getting back to his old, confident self made Lindsay smile.
The doctors had told her that not only would Danny have intense and difficult physical obstacles to overcome as he regained the use of his legs, but there would also be some emotional issues that she would have to be prepared to deal with. He would be frustrated, irritable, and possibly depressed as he struggled to grasp the effect that his physical limitations would have on his daily life.
And to some extent, they had been right. Danny had been frustrated, he had been angry and irritable at times, and there had been moments where she sensed that he might be slipping into a depression. But he had surprised her. He had leaned on her when things got really hard for him, and he had clung to their little family like a life preserver as he bobbed precariously in an ocean of uncertainty.
And through it all, Lindsay had been astounded by his focus on keeping both herself and Lucy happy. She knew he felt guilty about not being able to do a lot of the things around the house that he used to, but he rarely took it out on them. Instead, he poured his energy into his physical therapy, some days working himself to exhaustion. But he always made time to do what he could with Lucy. He would lay on their bed and read her stories, or cruise around the apartment with Lucy on his lap, smiling as the little girl gazed up at him adoringly.
And at night, after Lucy had been put to sleep, he would make time for her. They would lay in bed and talk about anything and everything. Everything, that is, except the physical connection that they were both missing. After a few weeks, Lindsay had started to take matters into her own hands, thinking that she was being very discreet about it. But Danny knew her better than that, and he called her on it.
She knew that she had hurt him by not telling him how she felt. Her heart had broken when he had confessed that he felt that she was taking away one of the few things that he could do for her by not letting him be a part of the physical release that she needed. And that night, she had let Danny help her, and she had been immensely satisfied by what he was able to do for her with only his fingers.
But still she had felt selfish. Like she was taking without giving anything in return. And now that Danny was back on his feet, albeit with the help of a cane, she was just waiting for the moment when he would give her some indication that he was ready, so that she could return the favour.
After finishing her nightly regimen, Lindsay stepped out into their bedroom. She stood by the side of their bed and removed the towel from around her head, using it to wring the last of the excess water from her hair. As she did so, she heard the distinctive shuffling sound of Danny slowly making his way down the hall. The shuffling stopped and Lindsay looked up to see her husband standing in the doorway, leaning against the doorjamb, his body sagging with exhaustion after a long day.
"Hey baby," she said, smiling at him. "You almost ready for bed?"
She felt suddenly very self-conscious as Danny took in her appearance, grazing his eyes up her body until his blue eyes met her brown ones. She gave him an uncertain smile, and was taken aback by the words that left his mouth.
"Lindsay, I want you," he said simply.
Confusion swept over her, and she had to seek clarification. "You want me to what, sweetie?" she asked.
He gave her a soft smile. "I want you, Lindsay," he said, slowly shuffling his way over to their bed and lowering himself down with a groan so that he was sitting on the edge. "Just you. I want to make love to you."
Lindsay straightened up, taking in her husband's appearance. Tossing the small towel she had been using on her hair over into the laundry hamper, Lindsay moved to sit beside Danny.
She had waited for months to hear those words come from his lips, but she was worried that he was pushing himself too far, too fast. "Are you sure?" she asked tentatively.
"I'm so very, very sure," he said, nodding his head to emphasize his words. She heard him swallow nervously before he turned to her, lifting his hand to cup her cheek. "You are so wonderful," he whispered, "And I love you so much, Linds. I just want to be able to feel you again."
Lindsay could feel her chest constricting with his heartfelt confession. She raised her own hand and placed it on top of his and turned her face so that she was kissing his palm, keeping his hand in place with her own.
"I want to feel you again, too, Danny," she murmured into his fingers, "but I don't want to hurt you."
"Linds, I promise that I'll tell you the second it gets too much. But please," he pleaded, "let me try."
Lindsay continued to nuzzle her cheek into his hand, feeling his warm fingers on her face. She wanted this, oh God, did she ever. And hearing the desire in his voice was doing things to her, raking up sensations in her that she hadn't dared to let herself feel since he had been injured. She closed her eyes and nodded her head slowly, hearing Danny exhale the breath that he had been holding while waiting for her response.
Opening her eyes, she reached up and took Danny's face in her own hand. "But you promise me, Danny, that if there is any pain, you tell me right away and we'll stop. Promise me," she demanded.
He gave her a shy smile before nodding his head in agreement. "You got it, babe," he said.
"So, how do you want to do this?" Lindsay asked, running her fingers through Danny's hair.
Danny chuckled, "I don't know, Linds," he admitted. "I figured you'd tell me no, so I didn't really sit down and make a plan."
Lindsay felt her heart flutter at his words. He thought she would deny him? That she didn't want him just as badly as he wanted her? She leaned in nipped at his earlobe, drawing it into her mouth and sucking lightly before releasing him. "Do you want me to be on top? Would that be easier for you?" Lindsay whispered against his neck.
She heard Danny's breath hitch in his throat at her words. She pulled back to look at him as he nodded his agreement. "Yeah, that... that would be... I would like that," he said.
Lindsay leaned forward and placed a timid kiss on his lips, as Danny's hand slid up to tangle in her damp hair. He slid his other arm around her waist, holding her to him and deepening their kiss. At the feeling of his arms around her and his lips working against her own, Lindsay couldn't help but release a soft moan as she felt a heat rising up inside of her.
She moved her hand down from Danny's face, trailing it down his neck until she came to the buttons of his shirt. Loosening the first two buttons, Lindsay slid her hand inside, feeling his warm skin against her cool hand. She felt Danny's muscles flex and tense at her touch. He groaned as her fingers found his nipple and she began to pinch and flick the delicate nub, causing it to tighten and harden.
Lindsay moved her other hand to undo the rest of the buttons on his shirt, pushing the offending garment off his shoulders and exposing his upper body to her. Gently, and without breaking their kiss, she pushed on Danny's shoulders until he was lying down flat on his back on the bed. She straddled his lap and began to move her lips downward, starting from his lips and heading down to his jaw, his neck, his collar bone.
When she reached his chest, she slid down until she could close her mouth around one of his nipples, sucking on the now rock hard nub until she had Danny writhing beneath her.
"God, Lindsay," he breathed. "That... that feels amazing. Oh, God, I missed you."
Lindsay lifted her head momentarily to look up at Danny who was lying with his eyes closed, biting his lower lip as she moved above him, trying to bring him the pleasure that he had been denied for so long. "I missed you too, baby," she whispered. She stuck out her tongue and licked his other nipple before blowing lightly over the wet skin.
Danny moaned softly, sliding his hands up Lindsay's bare thighs until they disappeared under the edge of the towel. Gently he cupped her backside in his hands, kneading the soft flesh he found there with his fingers.
"Linds, please," he said as she pressed kisses to his torso, slowly making her way down to his belt. "Lindsay, I... I can't..." His sentence was cut off as a loud gasp escaped his lips as Lindsay moved her body above him, rubbing herself against his growing erection. "Shit! Oh my God."
Lindsay froze, fearing that she'd gone too fast, that she'd done something to hurt him. "Danny?" she asked anxiously as she made her way back up his body to gently caress his cheek.
He opened his eyes and looked up at her, giving her a timid smile. "I'm fine," he said, his cheeks blushing red as he tried to explain. "It's just... it's been a while and I'm a bit... sensitive..." he turned and looked away as his word's registered in Lindsay's mind.
"Did you... did you already..."
Danny looked back at her, shaking his head and smiling. "No, not yet," he said. "But I'm pretty close... and I don't want to waste it. I want to be inside of you."
Lindsay leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead. She pulled back and gazed down at him. "Let's get you comfortable," she whispered as she kissed his lips. She pushed herself off of him, standing beside the bed. She helped Danny to sit up, noticing that he winced at the sudden change in position. "You okay?"
"Fine," Danny replied as he bent forward to try to untie his shoes.
"Danny, you promised," Lindsay said, her hands on her hips as she watched him grimace as he struggled to reach down to his feet.
He sat up and looked at her, leaning his elbows on his knees. "I'm okay, Linds," he said. "It's nothing new. No more pain than I was in before we started."
She raised her eyebrows at him and he held up his hands in surrender. "I promised, okay. I know. But it's really just the same pain I feel at the end of every day," he said. "I'll be fine. And if it gets worse I give you my word that I will stop you, okay?"
Lindsay stepped forward and stroked his hair before pulling him toward her and resting his cheek against her towel-clad stomach. He wrapped his arms around her and she ran her hands over his shoulders, gently pushing him back so that she could see his face.
"Do you want me to help you?" she asked. She knew how much Danny hated asking for help, but he had gotten better since his injury. But now that he was more mobile, he was once again trying to prove his independence. She waited for his response, gently massaging his shoulders as she did so.
He grinned up at her. "Could you help me take off my shoes, please?" he asked.
She breathed a sigh of relief, nodding as she bent down and knelt in front of him, untying his shoelaces and helping him to slip his feet out of his runners. Then she slipped a finger inside his socks, one at a time, and pulled them off his feet as well. When she was done, she looked up and saw Danny smiling down at her.
"Thank you," he said before shimmying backwards on the bed so that his legs were no longer dangling off the edge. He lay down and began to unbuckle his belt. When that was done, he moved to his button and fly, undoing them in record time. With another grimace, he slowly lifted his hips and began wiggle out of his pants and boxers. Panting, he lowered himself back down to the bed once he had pushed the fabric down to his upper thighs. Lindsay could tell that he was steeling himself to sit up and get himself undressed the rest of the way, but she couldn't simply stand by and watch him struggle.
"Babe, can I help?" she asked, kneeling on the bed beside him.
Danny collapsed onto his back, giving her a weary smile. "Could you, maybe... I can't get my pants off fast enough," he admitted giving her a wink.
Lindsay reached down and tugged on the fabric until his legs were completely free. Dropping the clothing on the floor at the foot of the bed, she turned her attention back to Danny. He was gazing at her with unabashed desire in his eyes and she blushed as he raked his eyes over her body, still wrapped in the towel, and licked his lips.
"What are you thinking, Danny?" she asked.
"I'm thinking that it's about time you got yourself over here and on top of me, Montana," Danny said.
She grinned at him as she straddled his legs, carefully lowering her body down onto his thighs. She placed her hands on his stomach, stroking his muscular torso with her fingers.
Danny had always been fit and lean, but since being in the wheelchair, he had worked hard on his upper body strength, compensating for the lack of movement below his waist. This meant that his already fantastic chest, abs and arms were now at an almost Adonis-like state of fitness, and Lindsay never tired of running her fingers over his hard, toned body.
She felt Danny shifting underneath her as her fingers moved down to explore his hips. Her head snapped up and she looked at him.
"I'm not hurting you, am I?" she asked, worry evident in her voice.
Danny grinned down at her. "No, you're tickling me," he chuckled.
She smiled back at him. "You want me to stop?"
"No way. I've waited for months to be able to feel your fingers on me again. Don't you dare stop, Mrs. Messer," he said, his eyes glinting with mischief.
A huge smile spread across Lindsay's face at Danny's words. Slowly, she moved her hands down to his thighs, squeezing them lightly before she brought them back up to his cock, her fingers gently exploring his length and hardness, her insides tingling at the prospect of feeling him moving inside of her again.
She closed her hands around him, stroking him slowly and firmly. Danny let out a groan of appreciation, which caused the heat in Lindsay's belly to increase tenfold. He'd spent so much time making sure that she got her satisfaction, that she hadn't felt neglected, never asking for anything in return. And now that he was able to feel again, she wanted to make sure that he knew how much she appreciated what he had done for her.
"You like that, baby?" she asked as she increased the pace of her strokes, feeling his cock strain and harden even more in her hands.
"Fuck," Danny croaked out. He swallowed hard, closing his eyes as Lindsay continued to massage him. Keeping one hand working on his shaft, she slipped the other down between his legs and gently cupped his balls. She felt his entire body tense at the contact, and judged from the way Danny had begun to pant that he was enjoying the sensations.
"Baby, talk to me," Lindsay whispered as she continued to move her hands over his most sensitive areas. "Are you close? Tell me what you want."
"I want... oh, fuck, Lindsay," Danny moaned, his hips bucking up into her hand involuntarily. "Shit, I'm close baby."
"What do you want, Danny?"
Danny's hands moved from where they had been gripping the sheets at his sides, his fingers seeking contact with her body. He found her knees and his hands slid up her legs until he was gripping her hips, squeezing her tightly.
"Shit, baby, stop," he panted, his eyes screwed shut, his body tense.
"Danny? Dan, are you okay?" she asked as she stilled her hands, moving them to rest on his thighs. She rubbed his legs, hoping that the gesture would comfort him.
"I'm good. I'm good," Danny said, opening his eyes. He looked at Lindsay, his cheeks flushed. "Sorry if I scared you. I just... I'm not used to getting this close this fast," he mumbled, clearly embarrassed.
"You've got nothing to be ashamed of, Dan," Lindsay said, giving him a supportive smile. "Your doctor said that the first couple times you might get a bit of a sensation overload. I'm the one that should be sorry, baby. Not you. I got carried away. Do you need a minute?"
Danny squeezed her hips, his fingers gripping her underneath the towel that still covered her. "I'm good, Linds," he said. "I just... maybe we should..."
"Maybe we should stop all the foreplay and fuck already?" Lindsay asked smirking at him.
"Well, I was going to try to find a more delicate way of putting it," Danny chuckled as he ran his fingers down Lindsay's thighs, playing with the hem of her towel. "But yeah. Basically that's what I'm thinking."
Lindsay moved her hands up the front of her body, grabbing the edges of the towel and untucking them, sighing as the cool air of the room hit her now fully exposed body as she dropped the towel on the floor behind her. She sat up on her knees and scooted up the bed so that she was positioned directly over Danny's cock. She gave him a flirtatious wink before slowly lowering herself onto him.
As she felt Danny's hard erection slide inside of her, she let out a satisfied moan as she felt herself stretch around him.
"Montana, oh, God," Danny called out as she took his full length inside of her.
"You okay, Dan?" she asked, as she let herself adjust to accommodate his width and length. It had been so long, and she felt as though she could feel every ridge of his erection, and it felt amazing.
"Oh, so much better than okay, Linds," was Danny's response. "God, baby, you are so fucking tight."
Lindsay knew that in their current state, neither of them was going to last much longer, and she wanted to make the most of it, so she slowly began to rock her hips against his. She leaned forward so that she could support more of her weight on her arms, not wanting to strain Danny too much their first time.
"Just relax, Danny," she said, "Let me do the work, baby."
Danny nodded his head, squeezing his eyes shut as she moved on top of him, her pace increasing. She leaned forward and rested her hands on either side of Danny's head, deepening the angle of his penetration, causing them both to call out in ecstasy.
As her hips rocked faster and faster against his own, Lindsay captured Danny's mouth in a searing kiss, her tongue thrusting into his mouth in time with the rhythm of their hips. She felt Danny's hands trail up her back, his short nails digging into the soft skin on her back, causing her to arch toward him, pressing herself more firmly against him.
"Oh, Danny," she breathed against his lips as she continued to ride him at a frantic pace, "I'm so close. So close."
Taking the hint, Danny moved one hand from her back and brought it down between their bodies, his fingers seeking the familiar bundle of nerves. Her body tensed in anticipation of feeling his fingers on her clit, her mind reeling at his ability to send her over the edge.
She felt his fingers slide in between her wet folds and her whole body jerked as he began to draw firm circles around her clit with his fingers.
"Oh, yes! Yes! Yes! Danny, yes!" she cried out as the tingling in her belly began to spread outward. "Oh, God. Baby, I'm going to come!"
Danny brought his other hand down from her back and cupped her breast, pinching her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. "Come for me, Montana," he whispered in her ear, sending a delicious shiver through her body.
She continued to thrust her hips down onto Danny's as she felt the first throes of her orgasm ripple through her body. The feeling of Danny's cock inside of her, and his fingers stimulating her clit and her nipples was too much and she came hard and fast, shouting out his name.
As she came down from her high, she continued to squeeze her inner muscles around Danny's throbbing cock, and she could tell by the tension in his body and the way he was panting that he was close. She pushed herself back up so that she was straddling his hips, her hands resting on his stomach and she began to rock back and forth on top of him again.
"Come on, baby," she whispered. "I know you're almost there, Danny. I can feel you. Just let go, honey."
She watched as Danny panted and writhed before he finally let go.
"Linds!" he shouted as his orgasm tore through his body. She continued to rock gently on top of him, squeezing her inner muscles around him to prolong his release. "Oh, Jesus! Montana!"
When she felt the last of the tension ebb out of Danny's body, Lindsay leaned down and placed a soft and loving kiss on his lips.
"Oh, Mary, mother of God," Danny panted as he gazed up at his wife. "Fuck, that was amazing, Linds. Thank you, baby."
Lindsay carefully lifted herself off of Danny, noticing how he winced as he repositioned himself on the bed.
"You sure you're okay?" she said as she lay down beside him, reaching out to stroke his face with her fingers.
"I feel fantastic, Linds," he said, turning his head and smiling at her.
"You're not sore?" she asked tentatively.
"Lindsay," Danny's voice was serious as he took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers and resting their joined hands on his chest. "I feel like a whole person for the first time in a long time. And I'm not just talking about the sex. Over the past few months, I think we've gotten to know each other better, and I love that. I love finding out new things about you everyday. But I've missed... this. This feeling of having a connection to you that nobody else has."
"I've missed you too, Danny," Lindsay said pressing a kiss to his chest before nuzzling down onto him once more. She pressed her body up against his and smiled to herself as she felt him move to tangle his legs in with hers.
I would love to know your thoughts on this one. I hope I didn't get too carried away with the fluffiness... Please feel free to leave a review or a comment - you know that they're always appreciated!
Oh, and if you haven't already, please have a peek at the companion stories to this one - Just As You Are and Cheer Up Danny!