Note: This was originally three parts, but I split it into like six plus an epilogue when I went back to start editing. Maybe the shorter chapters will be more manageable XD There were too many line breaks before, anyway lol

Chapter 1

Yukine rested his arms on the railing and leaned against it, watching as laughing shinki wandered about the lawn below. It was cold and blustery down in the outside world, but seasons didn't mean much in Takamagahara. It was as pleasantly warm as always, with a cool breeze dancing about gaily. He basked in the nice weather and was determined to enjoy it to the fullest before having to return to winter. It was a cruel trick of fate that he was named after snow when he couldn't stand the cold. He could thank Yato for that one.

Yato, who was the reason Yukine was stuck waiting around. The stupid god hadn't even explained why he had wanted to talk to Bishamon, just said it was 'god stuff' and shooed Yukine off to amuse himself. To be fair, he would have assumed Yukine would take the time to catch up with Kazuma. Which was true, except that Kazuma had gotten called away to take care of something else and Yukine was left on his own again.

He had wandered around for a bit and then found a balcony jutting off one of the big second-floor rooms near the staircase. He'd been up here ever since, watching the shinki that meandered outside. They all looked happy as they chatted and laughed together. Yukine wondered what it would be like to be part of an entire family of shinki. It could be nice…although he also liked being Yato's only shinki and getting all the attention. Maybe that made him sound like a spoiled kid, but that was the way he liked it.

"Oh, Yukine," said a voice from behind him. "There you are. Yato's looking for you."

He turned and nodded to Bishamon. "Are you finished? I apologize for whatever my idiot master said."

Bishamon cracked a smile. "He's definitely a piece of work. He's wandering around looking for you."

"Alright, I'd better go." He paused as something struck him suddenly. "Oh, um…"

"Yes? What is it?"

Yukine turned away and frowned out at the happy family of shinki gathered on the lawn again as a flush crept up his neck and cheeks. "I just…wanted to apologize."

"It's alright, you don't need to apologize for Yato. His idiocy is all his own."

"No, I mean… I'm sorry that I said this place was hell," he mumbled. It had been a long time since then and a lot had changed, but it occurred to him that he had never actually apologized.

There was a long pause with only the indistinct but cheerful murmur of voices from below, but then Bishamon sighed and walked over to lean on the railing beside him. He snuck a glance at her, but she was looking out at her shinki as well, her eyes distant.

"It did get pretty bad," she said. "Maybe I needed a wakeup call. But Kazuma is helping me do things right this time so none of that happens again. I just…wish Suzuha was still here to see it."

Yukine's heart twisted at the reminder of his old friend. "Everyone seems happy," he said, clearing his throat. "Genuinely happy, this time. I think that would make him happy too."

"I hope so." Bishamon's smile was just a quick, melancholy twist of the lips. "It's not a family in name only anymore."

"Do you really see them like that?" Yukine asked curiously. "Family?"

Bishamon frowned and a little crease appeared between her brows. "It's…complicated. When we give our shinki a name, we use our own lives to do it. In that way, we give you your second chance at life after death. Some gods see shinki just as tools or protectors or companions, but many of us see them as something like our children because of that. We give you your second life and raise you when you're reborn without any memories and take care of you and protect you the best we can. It's always going to be a little more complicated than that, of course. You protect and guide us too, and the bond between god and shinki is often very fluid.

"And… To be honest, I'm not sure how well we gods really understand family in the traditional sense. We pick up the idea from the humans we see and the shinki we name, in the same way that we learn right from wrong. And maybe in the same way, we're above it or it doesn't quite apply to us. Traditional family roles can be impossible to apply to gods and shinki sometimes and…sometimes I think that we gods are incapable of nurturing the way humans can.

"My shinki are like my children, sometimes I feel like their mother, but I can never be a true mother in the human sense. I'll always also be a master and god, protector and charge, leader and follower. It doesn't always come naturally, being a parent, and sometimes it feels more like we're just building a village with us as the leaders. I can't give them everything a human mother would, can't fill that hole.

"But still… We won't ever fit into traditional familial roles and maybe I don't understand exactly how to be the mother I want to be, but we are family. A bit of an unconventional family, but a family nonetheless. I believe that."

Yukine blinked at her in surprise. He had been curious because he'd seen how different each god's relationships were with their shinki and had wondered how immortal beings so far above humans could really build such close relationships with them, and the answer seemed as complicated as the question.

It sounded like something Bishamon had really pondered and thought over before, something she had been searching for the answers to already. After what had happened with Kugaha and the massacres of her shinki clans, maybe that shouldn't be a surprise. She really had been working to figure out how to build a family the right way.

"That sounds nice," Yukine mused. "Even with everything. It really does seem like a family."

"Yukineee! Yukine, where are youuu?" Yato ambled into view down below, hands cupped around his mouth as he called for Yukine and searched the grounds. He sidled up behind Aiha. "Hey, have you seen my kid?"

Yukine sighed and shook his head. "I guess I'd better go before my idiot master gets into any more trouble."

"Please get him out of here," Bishamon said, rolling her eyes. She dropped her chin onto her folded hands, and her eyes softened as she watched Yato harassing her shinki. "He's a fool and it doesn't come naturally to him either, but he tries."

"Do you think so?" Yukine asked. He frowned down at Yato, who was waving his hands about in an exaggerated fashion and complaining loudly.

Yato was…different. Yukine wasn't always sure what to make of him when he seemed to slip between roles and personalities from one second to the next. Yukine didn't doubt he cared—they both cared very deeply despite their differences and had been through too much together not to—but sometimes he wondered.

When Yato called Yukine his kid, what did he really mean by that? Their relationship was complicated, and Bishamon's musings had raised some questions too. If she had such a complicated view of her shinki—she, one of the gods with the strongest and most obvious familial tendencies—then was Yato's view just as complex? What did he think about Yukine?

Bishamon turned her head and raised her eyebrows at Yukine. "Do you?"

Yukine was irritated. It was Yato's fault, of course. Yato had perfected the art of being a nuisance over the centuries. He had been making stupid comments and lazing around instead of helping out Daikoku and had bought more useless charms with their money. Like usual. And like usual, Yukine needed a break.

He had been pacing the streets, working through the worst of his frustrated energy so that he didn't strangle his idiot god, and was just calming down to the point of readying himself to go back when a voice piped up behind him.

"Poor Yukine. Yato can be a bit of a handful. Is he giving you problems too?"

Yukine stiffened and spun around. Nora was crouched on the railing of the bridge, her balance rock solid on the thin strip of wood, with her elbows propped on her knees and her chin resting on her hand in the position she seemed to favor so much. That small, unnerving smile pulled at the corners of her lips, and her dark eyes sparkled with something like amusement.

"No," Yukine snapped. He had the feeling that she meant something entirely different, that the problems she had with Yato were not nearly the same, and she wasn't someone he wanted to commiserate with. "Yato is fine. Go away."

Nora laughed. "You came to my bridge."

Yukine looked around and realized that he had, in fact, wandered across the bridge Nora often frequented. Why she had picked a favorite bridge to hang out at was beyond him, but it seemed like a place best avoided. If he'd been paying more attention to where he was going, he wouldn't have come.

"And now I'm leaving," he said flatly, turning to stalk away.

"If you're looking for a father in Yato, you'll be disappointed."

He whipped back around. "What? Don't be ridiculous!"

His cheeks flushed. Where would she even get an idea like that?

Nora only stared back, her smile gone and her eyes glittering solemnly. "Yato doesn't understand family. The only experience he has is with Father. Father called him his child and made him a tool, and Yato calls you his 'kid' and sees you as a tool. It's what he knows. That's what family means to him."

"Th-that's not true!" Yukine spluttered. He might be confused about Yato's feelings sometimes, but he knew the god saw him as more than just a tool. "He doesn't–"

"Yato is very good at wearing masks, isn't he?" Nora remarked, drawing Yukine up short. An uneasy feeling curled in his stomach. That was true. Yato was disturbingly good at hiding his true feelings and putting up fronts and keeping secrets. "He shows you what you want to see so that you're easier to control. But to be fair, it's also your fault. You're always so mean to him, aren't you? You call him lazy when he works so hard, selfish when he does so much for you, worthless when he's only ever wanted to be needed. To be wanted. It's not very fair to expect him to be a father to you when you're such a disrespectful, cruel child."

Nora's eyes had narrowed ever so slightly, and something like resentment flickered in their depths. Like she resented him for his bad behavior.

Her accusation shook Yukine to the core. All this time he had been wondering about Yato's views and imperfections, and he hadn't thought to consider what role he and his own behavior might play. He…did say mean things about Yato sometimes. But Yato never seemed bothered and surely had to know when Yukine didn't mean it. Still… Was Yukine doing damage with his words?

"It's not like that!" he protested. "He knows–"

"But it's probably a good thing. You wouldn't like it if Yato tried to be a father. The only example he has to follow is Father's."

Fury flashed through Yukine like lightning, burning away his unease and disorientation. He might have his doubts about some things, but he had absolutely no doubts about this.

"Yato would never be like his father," he spat.

"Oh?" Nora's smile was back again and her eyes gleamed bright with amusement. "You have no idea. I've known him for centuries, and you've only known him for a few months. What do you know? Disobey him and see what happens."

"I disobey him all the time."

"Not your silly teenage complaints and obstinacy. You still obey him in the end, at least when it's important. You've never pushed him to the point where he'll snap. When he disobeys Father, he's punished. When he wants to leave, Father drags him back. If you disobey him, do you think he'll let you escape punishment? If you want to leave, do you think he'll let you go?"

"He would never…" Yukine said weakly. He knew Yato would never be as cruel as his father, but it was also true that Yukine wasn't sure what would happen if he truly crossed his god on something important.

Satisfaction glimmered in Nora's eyes. "Yato doesn't understand love. No one has ever loved him, no one but me. And he has never loved anyone. He can fake it when he needs to, but he doesn't know what love feels like and certainly doesn't love you."

"That's not…"

"Poor little boy," Nora said with her cruel smile and knife-sharp eyes. "You're dead. You don't need a family anymore."

She slid back over the railing and disappeared from view, although he didn't hear her hit the water. He stared at where she had been, but it seemed like she was well and truly gone.

Yukine was left in turmoil. He shouldn't listen to anything she said—he knew better. She liked to stir up trouble. But it was also true that she had been with Yato since the beginning and might know him better than anyone else.

But everything she had said was ridiculous. Yato didn't see him as just a tool or fake his affection, and would never ever be like his father no matter how much Yukine pushed him. And it was just unbearably cruel what she had said about love. Maybe Yato's father had never loved him—and that only made Yukine angry and sad because how could that bastard call himself a father when he had only ever manipulated and abused Yato?—but other people had. And did. Hiyori did, at least, and lots of people cared about him. And Yukine was sure that Yato could love too. He was sure of it.

Still, he stared at the spot where Nora had been for a long time, his mind racing and his emotions raging wildly out of control as he tried to sort everything out.

"There you are!"

Yukine jumped a foot in the air and whirled around. The blood drained from his face as he found himself nose to nose with Yato, who had materialized behind him like magic and leaned down with a grin.

"Y-Yato!" Yukine squeaked.

Nora's words and Bishamon's musings bounced around inside his skull like alarm bells, and he realized quite suddenly that he was not ready to see Yato. Not while his brain was still going haywire.

"I've been looking all over for you!" Yato continued blithely, as if he didn't feel Yukine's unsettled emotions in his chest. "We have a job! Let me just get her again…"

Yukine opened his mouth, found no words, and closed it again. Yato still wore his trademark goofy grin as he pulled his phone out of his pocket to call back the client. The phone rang one, two, three times, and the corners of his mouth quirked downward. Yukine could practically hear him wondering if he had been forgotten already.

But then the call was accepted. Before Yato could even open his mouth, a panicked jumble of words poured through the line. Yukine couldn't make out what exactly was being said, but he could hear the muffled terror and Yato's brows drew together in a deeper frown.

"Let's go, Yukine," the god said. "Sounds like it's an emergency."

He grabbed Yukine's arm, and the world disappeared and swirled around them and rematerialized before the shinki could protest. The popped back into existence right in front of a frightened girl with messy black curls, terrified green eyes, and a phone still pressed to her ear. She was racing through the grassy field of the park a few blocks from Kofuku's shrine, but stumbled to a halt just before running smack into them.

"Hello!" Yato chirped brightly. "What seems to be the problem?"

"B-bakagami!" Yukine sputtered. "Maybe those."

Half a dozen ayakashi were scuttling after the girl, chittering with their relentless chorus of "smells nice…", and judging by the horrified look she threw back over her shoulder, she could see them. Yukine slashed his hand across his body, and a borderline cut off the phantoms' headlong chase.

"Well, obviously." Yato rolled his eyes. "But it's unusual for humans to see ayakashi, so there must be more to the story."

Yukine groaned. "Why would you want to get the story first instead of killing them?"

Yato waved a hand dismissively. "I knew you could throw up a borderline."

Yukine just sighed. He wasn't sure if he should be flattered that Yato had so much faith in him or exasperated by the god's unwavering stupidity.

The girl gaped, her gaze darting between them and the ayakashi clawing at the glowing barrier. "That's…"

"A borderline!" Yato said helpfully. "The phantoms can't get through it." He threw an arm around Yukine's shoulders and grinned. "My kid's pretty great, huh?"

A small shudder ran through Yukine's body, and his irritation melted back into something insecure and nervous and uncertain. What did that mean? Bishamon thought Yato was actually trying to be family to Yukine, but even she had her concerns about gods making families. And Nora… Yukine didn't think that Yato saw him only as a tool, but he wasn't sure he saw him as family either.

So where did that leave them? Master and servant? God and shinki? Friends? Family after all? All of the above? None of the above? Something else entirely?

Yato was so complicated and had so many masks that Yukine wasn't sure of much of anything.

"Huh?" Yato frowned down at Yukine. "You alright, Yukine?"

"Fine," Yukine mumbled, shrugging Yato's arm off. He shoved down his tumultuous storm of unsettled emotions, hoping to throw Yato off the scent. He should trust Yato and not worry about silly things, especially not silly things that Nora, of all people, had said.

Yato opened his mouth, but the girl lurched forward then, scrabbling in her pocket until she found a five yen coin to shove at the god with shaking fingers.

"Here," she said breathlessly. "Please. These–these things, I can't…"

Gold danced in and out of Yato's fingers as he played with the coin absently. "We'll take care of your phantoms, no problem. But it's unusual for you to see them at all, and you have unnaturally strong ties to the Far Shore. We'll have to take care of that too, or the ayakashi will continue to be attracted to you. Do you have any idea what might have triggered it? A near-death experience or an encounter with someone a little strange, perhaps?"

"A-a week ago." She flinched back and inched toward Yato and Yukine as a snake-like ayakashi slammed into the borderline. "I started seeing them a week ago after a diving accident. I hit the water wrong and passed out and almost drowned, but a friend pulled me out. When I woke up, I had started seeing these…things." Her lips trembled and she wrapped her arms around herself. "They're terrifying. I thought I was going crazy… I came out here because it seems like there are less of them in places where there are fewer people, but some showed up and started chasing me."

"I see." Yato nodded to himself, calm and unruffled. "You probably came close enough to crossing over that you picked up some ties to the Far Shore. The ayakashi that sense you can see them are going to be interested in you and cause problems."

"Like Hiyori?" Yukine asked with a frown.

"Sort of, except that Hiyori's condition is more severe. This seems like a more minor case, with no indication of her soul slipping out. But even paying attention to ayakashi will attract their interest. We'll have to cut her ties. They'll take too long to fade naturally if she keeps renewing them by interacting with ayakashi."

"Um…" The girl looked between them, wetting her lips nervously. "What–?"

"Don't worry about it." Yato flashed her a grin. "We'll take care of everything. Alright, Yukine. We'll kill the ayakashi first, so you can release your borderline."

"Okay."

"Come, Sekki."

The borderline shimmered out of existence as the familiar transformation took over Yukine's body. His doubts and worries evaporated into thin air as he focused on the fight. Yato led, as usual, centuries of swordplay guiding the blades in a deadly dance. In the beginning, Yukine had sat back and stayed sharp and that was about it. Yato was the master swordsman, and Yukine knew nothing of fighting.

But after months of working together, Yukine had learned how to join the dance. Yato fought with smooth, controlled, fluid movements, usually, but sometimes the rhythm was disrupted. When he was particularly infuriated, he became more vicious and wild. Sometimes it served him well, but sometimes it led him to make mistakes. When he was injured, he had to work around his wounds and adjust his style. When he was intently focused on the fight, sometimes he missed another phantom sneaking up behind him.

These were things Yukine could help with. He followed Yato's lead, but he now had enough confidence to hold back or throw everything he had at a foe, redirect his trajectory, act on the things he noticed that Yato missed. Sometimes the two talked back and forth to coordinate, sometimes they worked in smooth silence, but always—almost always—they worked as one united force.

Yukine enjoyed it. He liked protecting Yato, even if sometimes he had to knock some sense into the idiot god when he was trying to protect Yukine from something silly instead of using him. Yukine was a weapon and a protector, and he wanted to be used like it. He felt needed and useful, and this was something he shared with Yato and only Yato.

It was something intimate and personal, becoming two halves of one whole. He didn't like to think about Nora fighting with Yato like this. Or any other shinki, to be honest. Call him jealous, but he didn't want anyone else encroaching on this bond. He was Yato's and Yato was his, and he didn't want to share.

It was a matter of trust, Yukine decided. He trusted Yato to take care of them and have the skill and spirit to win their battles, and Yato trusted him to stand by him no matter what and do what he thought was right and protect him. They trusted each other, and never was that more obvious than when they came together as extensions of each other in battle.

They slashed through the ayakashi effortlessly, Yato easily twisting out of the way of being blighted and Yukine dispatching the phantoms before they got too close to his god.

The girl was gaping at them in awe as the last of the ayakashi went down. "You… That's…"

"Pretty cool, huh?" Yato said cheerfully. "My kid's pretty awesome."

A small shiver of discomfort whispered through Yukine, but he was still too at peace to get too worked up.

He did wonder why Yato always seemed to give him the credit in their battles. Shinki were important, but Yato was the one who directed the fight and took the damage when something went wrong and used his skills to wield the blades. The praise always made Yukine feel proud of himself, but it wasn't like he did it all. They both needed each other.

"Thank you," the girl said. She looked torn between being impressed, grateful, and terrified out of her mind. "What are you…going to do?"

"Sever your ties to the Far Shore," Yato replied. "Don't worry, it won't hurt. You won't be able to see the ayakashi anymore, and they'll have no reason to take a special interest in you. Ready, Yukine?"

"I don't know…" Yukine mumbled, eyeing the girl uneasily. He didn't see bonds like Yato did, which made it hard to judge what he was doing. This was one particular task that he rarely felt comfortable with.

"Don't worry," said Yato. "Cutting ties is my specialty. I'll guide you. Just trust me."

The girl was starting to look more and more spooked, like she was considering running away from the crazy man with the swords, but Yukine's resolve hardened. He might have his doubts about some things, but in moments like these he would follow Yato to the ends of the earth.

"Okay," he said.

Yato wasted no time, and the girl flinched back as he swung the swords through the air around her body in sharp, precise arcs. Yukine saw nothing, but he thought he felt the slightest resistance and then a quiet breaking. Yato circled around behind the girl, lowering the blades as he watched her.

"What are you doing?" Yukine asked.

Yato didn't respond, and the girl's head swung back and forth. After a moment, she shook her head more sharply and turned to walk right past them, her eyes glazed with confusion.

"That's weird," she was muttering to herself as she walked away. "What am I even doing here?"

"Revert, Yukine," Yato said, and Yukine shifted back into his human form beside him. "Good job. We just cut her ties to the Far Shore, so there's no need to go strengthening them again. We were just talking to her, so she might have still seen us if we stayed there. She seems pretty susceptible to connecting with the Far Shore. Since there was no one there, she assumed no one had been there at all and forgot all about us. Hopefully she'll stay out of trouble."

"Huh." Yukine watched the girl hurry away across the grass. "Does that happen a lot? Making ties like that?"

"Not really. Most people have a hard time making a connection with the Far Shore that lasts for more than a few seconds or minutes, but some people are more susceptible to making those ties than others." Yato grinned widely and shifted gears fast enough to give Yukine whiplash. "Heeey, let's go get some food!"

"…You just ate a couple hours ago."

"So? You can never have too much food! Mm, I wonder if Daikoku will make us something…"

Yukine shook his head. He knew it was no use to fight Yato on something like this or lecture him on his freeloading tendencies, so he just fell into step beside the god as he headed for Kofuku's shrine. They had walked for a couple minutes before Yato cleared his throat.

"So… Did something happen earlier?"

"What?" Yukine started, his heart doing a funny flip-flop in his chest. "No, not really."

"Really?" Yato's gaze slid sideways, skepticism shining bright in his eyes. "My chest has been aching, and your emotions are all over the place."

"Nothing happened," Yukine said firmly. No way was he going to tell Yato about everything Nora had said.

Yato winced, and Yukine realized too late that the god was going to know if he was lying.

"Look," Yato said carefully, "it's better if you just tell me. You can tell me anything, you know."

"There's nothing to tell," Yukine said. It was a half-truth at best, because there was plenty to tell even if he had no intention of telling it, but either it didn't register as a lie or Yato concealed his reaction to the sting.

"Yukine…"

"I'm fine," he snapped, and Yato's eye twitched briefly. "Everything is fine."

He quickened his pace, and Yato clamped his mouth shut despite his obvious skepticism.

That should have been the end of that, except it wasn't. Yato was the most annoyingly tenacious and stubbornly determined person on the planet when he decided to set his sights on something, and apparently he had set his sights on figuring out what was bothering Yukine. Maybe it was because Yukine's excuses had been so unconvincing that they necessitated further prodding, maybe it was because his emotions were still so unsettled that it had turned into an ongoing problem that needed to be solved, maybe Yato was just stubbornly annoying.

Whatever the case, the god would not drop it. Every time Yukine thought Yato might finally be giving it up, he'd casually ask what had happened or what was wrong as if trying to catch the shinki off guard and startle him into answering. Yukine inevitably responded with his go-to answers of nothing and I'm fine and stop pestering me already. Occasionally he would catch Yato wincing, but usually the god seemed fine and these were just small lies. Yukine was holding out hope that the minor stings would encourage Yato to leave it alone already.

Yukine just wanted some time to himself to think everything through and sort things out, and Yato's pestering wasn't helping. Yato asked after lunch, before dinner, before they went to bed, the next morning, after a tutoring session, on a job. Yukine shut him down each time. Yato was good at dropping subtle hints or questions into casual conversation, but Yukine wasn't fooled.

A couple nights later, Yukine was already tucked into bed reading by the light of the lamp when Yato drew in a breath.

"So, Yukine–"

"Just drop it," Yukine groaned. "It has nothing to do with you."

He flipped over and pulled the covers over his head, just missing the way Yato winced and frowned at his back.

Note: The more prescient of you might have some idea of where I'm going with this lol But it was fun anyway :3

Poor Yukine, being all insecure lol Just trust Yato, baby ;_;
Don't worry, they will both suffer by the end XD