Don't run away.
I could feel his breath on my lips. He was that close to me. I could smell the coke that he had drunken earlier on his breath and I could smell the gel in his hair. It was so beautiful but yet somehow bitter sweet, for I knew nothing would come from it, I knew it meant nothing to him and for the briefest moment I believed it meant nothing to me, but yet it did and there was nothing that I could do to change that even denial could only last awhile.
A tear slid down Maddy's cheek as she sat on the sand looking out into the ocean.
Things had only become more complicated since Cassie and Ric's breakup and if she was going to be completely honest with herself.
She ran her fingers through her hair
She had been feeling the suppressed feelings arise again as soon as she knew that her best friends were no longer together.
She lay her head on her knees again as the feeling of guilt succumbed her again.
She had been living in secret sin all this time. Everyone knew it was a terrible and unforgivable thing to be, Maddy gulped in love with her best friends boyfriend, the tears shook her body and it was extremely unacceptable to even think of dating your best friend's ex.
"Maddy"
And here he was. He had come after her, just like any best friend would. He sat down beside her.
"Oh Maddy I'm so sorry"
She wiped at her face, leaving behind any traces of her hurt.
She forced an understanding smile upon her face.
"It's ok"
He shook his head, seeming extremely upset with himself
"No Matilda, it's not ok" he bit his lip. "I just wanted to" he took in a deep breath. "So badly wanted to hurt her as much as she has hurt me"
He covered his eyes with his palms "I know that's a terrible thing to say"
Maddy looked out into the ocean again.
"It's a humane feeling to feel" she turned back to him "A lot of people would feel the same way and frankly if you guys didn't feel this way I would be concerned, as annoying as it is for me"
A look of guilt washed over his features "I'm sorry Maddy and I'm sure Cass is to, we've been so selfish we've forgotten how this would affect you and how it would make you feel, can you ever forgive me"?
Maddy gave a genuine smile, how could she not forgive him, as much as he had hurt her. He had never ever given them the real chance they deserved, she placed her hand atop of his for a brief moment " Of course I can" then as quickly as she had placed her hand there she quickly removed it and Ric found himself missing the warm contact.
Maddy stood up and scuffed her shoes in the sand, the warm grains filling her sandals.
"Well now this is all understood you should go and sort things out with Cass"
Ric stood up beside her, sending chills up her spine, she only hoped he didn't notice the change in her body language. The last thing she needed was for him to be aware of her unmentioned and forgotten feelings she had for him and clearly still had for him. One painful rejection was enough.
"I agree," He answered
And the little of her heart she had left broke. She could practically hear the shattered pieces hit the ground.
He placed her hand upon her shoulder.
"Thanks Maddy"
"Anytime" she whispered.
She silently cursed herself; it hadn't meant to come out that soft.
She cleared her throat.
"Now everything can go back to normal" she forced a grin. And I can forget all about this. Cause the best way to forget her feelings would be for her best friends to get back together which would equal no more complication and she could once again pretend and eventually forget like she had before that she had feelings for Ric Dalby. And as they say there is nothing like the reality that hits a person of seeing someone they love be with someone else force you to move on and eventually have all feelings they had for that person to fade away.
And after all they did make a good couple
Cassie was a feisty and adventurous girl and Ric was a somewhat dangerous guy. Of course that would make a better match than herself and Ric.
She couldn't believe she was going to say this, but as the sunset and her friend still stood next to her she had to make an escape
"You and Cass were made for each other," she said finalizing this meeting, this moment and this day. She could go to sleep tonight just for one night with a broken heart and wake up the next day forgetting that any of this had happened.
Ric who had been silent all this time, turned Maddy to face him.
"Matilda things won't go back to the way they were"
She gave him a confused look
" I'm not going to get back together with Cass"
Matilda couldn't hide the frustration in her voice
"Why not"?
He shoved his hands in his pockets.
"Someone once told me" his breath shook " That when something has ended it's best to not go back but go forward and that's what I'm doing"
"But you and Cass"
He shook his head.
"Maddy even if Cass and I did get back together it wouldn't be the same all the trust and respect I had for her I have no more."
"That can be gained back, you love each other"
He shrugged "Maybe so, but I don't want to even try". He squeezed her shoulder "Maddy it's over for me and Cass"
Maddy let the tears fall this time and Ric bit his lip unsure why his friend was suddenly crying.
"Maddy"?
She held up her hand and wiped her tears away with the other.
It wasn't that she was upset with what he said, but it was the reality that it brought.
What did this mean for him and her?
"What about us"?
Ric ran his fingers through his hair.
"We're friends forever Maddy and I don't expect you to stop being friends with Cass"
She shook her head
"That's good to know Ric," she answered with her head down
"And I'm open this time to anything else that may come from our friendship Maddy"
Maddy lifted her head
"But what about never going back"?
He shrugged "It seems to me we never went forward"
Maddy brushed her hair behind her ears, this day happening seemed to much to take in, especially these last few moments. Ric was openly giving an indication that he liked her in someway more than a friend. He looked at her questionley
And now it was her turn.
Maddy forgot the circumstances and grabbed his hand
"Lets just see what happens"
He nodded.
"One day at a time"
She smiled and nodded as well. She glanced down at her watch
"I guess I better go home"
"Me too"
"I guess I'll see you tomorrow"
"Yeah"
She turned and started to walk away when he called her name
"Maddy"
She stopped and turned around
"Just promise me you'll take all the chances and that you won't run away"
Maddy nodded
"I will if you will"
Ric smiled
"I promise"