I'm so sorry it's been ages since the last time I updated anything. I have had writer's block forever now and I've been so in the mood to write Blackcest, but this is the best I could spurt out with writer's block. I know it's not my best, but oh wells XD

The Last and the First Time

Regulus stared intently at his own reflection in the mirror – one last look. He looked the same as he always did – black hair, grey eyes, pale face, high cheekbones. But even as Regulus stared at himself, he felt that there was something different about his reflection. Maybe it was the dark circles under his eyes from stress and lack of sleep, or maybe it was the fact that he knew he was going to be dead before the day was up. Either way, Regulus felt unnerved and averted his eyes.

He checked the time and grabbed the bag of things he needed for his journey to retrieve Voldemort's horcrux. He had half an hour before Kreacher was meeting him outside the cave. He had half an hour left of freedom but he felt bound to his responsibility to tell Sirius the truth about his feelings.

Regulus had tried to tell Sirius that he was in love with him in a much more than brotherly way many times, but every single time he would freeze up and change the subject. This time he knew he had to tell Sirius the truth. He knew it wouldn't change anything – Regulus would still die. But at least he could die knowing that Sirius knew he was loved.

Taking a fleeting glance back at the room he had grown up in, Regulus closed his bedroom door behind him and closed his eyes. He thought of Sirius's flat and disapparated, leaving Grimmauld Place behind forever.

He appeared just outside the door of Sirius's flat. Lifting a shaky fist to knock on the door, he froze up. He couldn't do this. How would he even form the right words?

Regulus stood for a good five minutes in terrified silence until the door opened and Sirius was standing in the doorway giving him a confused look.

"Reg, are you alright?" Sirius asked.

"Mmhm," Regulus replied quickly, smiling slightly and running his hand through his hair nervously.

"Come in," Sirius said. "I was just heading out so it'll have to be quick."

Regulus stepped inside and nodded quickly. He paced back and forwards trying to think of what to say.

"Reg, you look worried," Sirius said softly. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I – I just… I need to tell you something and I don't know how," Regulus said quickly.

"You know you can tell me anything," Sirius said. "You don't have to worry."

"I know, but you say that now and then when you hear what I have to say you'll change your mind," Regulus replied.

Sirius sighed. "Hey, I really have to go. How about you wait here and think of how you're going to tell me? I'll be back in about an hour or so."

Before Regulus could respond, Sirius was halfway out the door.

"Sirius, wait!" Regulus yelled after him. "Don't leave. Please."

"I have to," Sirius said. "I'll lose my job if I don't go."

"I can't wait for you to come back," Regulus said desperately. "Please just let me tell you now."

"Okay," Sirius said. "Tell me."

Regulus tried to say the words. He tried to say "I love you", but nothing would come out.

"Sirius," Regulus said. "I—" He bit his lip. He knew what he had to do. Before he could talk himself out of it, he lunged forwards, wrapping his arms tight around Sirius and crashing their lips together. Regulus kissed Sirius with every little bit of energy he had in him – he'd been waiting for this for years and he needed it.

He felt Sirius resisting and he felt his questions answered without any words spoken – Sirius didn't feel the same way. But at least Regulus wouldn't have to deal with the consequences. He held onto Sirius tighter and deepened the kiss, letting himself forget for the briefest moment that he would soon be dead.

For the briefest moment, Regulus was truly happy.

They broke apart and Sirius stared at Regulus in stunned silence. Just as Sirius opened his mouth to speak, Regulus disapparated.

When Regulus arrived at the place he was going to die, he couldn't help but smile. And suddenly, he was no longer scared.

~The End~