3 Months Later She Tries To Creep Back Quietly...
HEY EVERYONE!
My Hugest Apologies For Not Uploading Anything In 3 Whole Months And I Know In The Grand Scheme Of Things 3 Months Isn't A Lot But I Feel So Bad If I Don't Update Regularly When I Used To Twice Almost 3 Times A Week!
So Yeah I Got Through The 3 GCSE's I Took And I Get My Results On The 21st (13 Days Away Oh My God!), I Went On A School Trip To Paris- Had An Amazing Time & Met Mickey Mouse At Disney Land! Had My Mock Week, Became A Prefect, Did My Week Of Work Experience & Officially Completed Year 10!
More Importantly Amber Made An Instagram Account So Go Follow Her theyellowframe & Keep Following Me friends_tow_all_the_pictures & On The Account I'm Co-Owning With 9 Of My Best Friends thefriendom So Overall Yeah A Lot Has Happened In 3 Months!
Yeah Anyway I'm In My 3rd Week Of My 6 Weeks Off & I Started This The First Week I Had Off & Finished It Towards The End Of Last Week But Completely Forgot To Upload It As Usual! Anyway I'll Let You Go Ahead & Read & Leave Me Some Of Your Wonderful Reviews Please & I'm Determined To Upload Twice More Before The End Of My Holiday & The Chaos Of Year 11 Begins!
I startle awake, panicking for a few short seconds, wondering why Monica is waking me at this ungodly hour until I realise it isn't Monica but a Cuban fellow who'd introduced himself as Andy Torres the minute I'd taken my seat.
"Sorry to wake you man" He apologies, "We touched down a couple minutes ago"
"Thanks" I mumble hoarsely, sending a grateful smile to the bald man who's visiting The City from Florida- God knows why he ended up in Tulsa though!
I'd almost asked him just after we'd taken off but he broke out into his life story deciding to tell me about his wife Ellie, their son- Stan, and some guy named Bobby, who he sounded pretty much besotted with.
Rubbing tiredly at my eyes I retrieve my briefcase from the overhead compartment as everyone begins to file into the aisles.
Taking a nighttime flight from Tulsa had seemed a brilliant idea at the time, now- not so much. Yes I'd get to spend almost an extra half a day with Monica, however I realise now that I'll spend all that extra time sleeping, pretty sure Monica will too.
Monica- my beautifully, talented and utterly perfect wife who I really do not deserve as of late.
Living in separate states for half the week- every week, is taking it's toll on the both of us. Sure I'm the one trekking between Manhattan and Tulsa while trying to run an office full time, no matter which of the 2 states I happen to be in, and while Monica has our 4 friends and our newborn niece to keep her company and her mind off our shitty situation, I am alone living it up in the sooner state.
I don't blame Monica for any of this though. I was the one who fell asleep in the meeting, I was the one who unknowingly volunteered to run the office in Tulsa, so I'm the one who's willingly talking the blame.
I mean at the end of the day it is my fault. I could have quit, or refused to move hoping they'd find someone else to relocate, or at the very least spoken to my boss and tried to convince him, but I didn't, and that's why it's now 1am and I'm trudging through JFK airport.
Wow. Didn't even realise I'd got off the plane. Time sure does fly when you're taking a recap of why you were stupid enough to let things get this far.
Life has been pretty much perfect for me since London. I'm married to my princess, my soulmate and my best friend in the entire world. I grin remembering Monica's wedding vows, remembering our wedding, and our honeymoon and the past year- our first as Mr and Mrs Bing, as a married couple and as a family- one we're hoping to extend.
We'd decided shortly after our wedding anniversary, on the day Emma had been born that we wanted a baby of our own, one to screw up in our own unique way, that would be half me-half Monica.
We started trying as soon as we could, every chance we got when I was home we'd lock ourselves away content on being with one another for as long as we could possibly get away with before someone came knocking.
The distance however created tension that we had no hold over.
We'd fought several times over the smallest of things that one of us had blown largely out of proportion and so came the decision that we wouldn't stop trying, but we wouldn't take it so seriously either. If Mon got pregnant- fantastic, we'd be over the moon, if not then we'd keep going like we'd always done. It lifted a weight I didn't know I'd been carrying and the dynamic of our relationship returned to it's usual carefree and utterly perfect state.
The distance still causes minor issues, lack of sleep between the both of us makes us extremely irritable- our newly found solution to that though is my first full day back in New York we spend sleeping and simply doing nothing, catching up on the sleep we lost on the days I was away.
As much as I love those days it pains me knowing that Monica is unable to sleep because of, yet again, my stupidity. We should be curled up in our bed now, side by side, Mon tucked under my arm with my head resting in the crook of her neck as we sleep. Instead Monica's probably awake, or has fallen into a restless sleep- she's worked double shifts on all of the days I've been away this week and I can tell by her voice every time we speak that she's utterly exhausted even though she refuses to admit it. And me. Well I'm stood on the edge of the sidewalk, briefcase in one hand, suitcase in the other, waiting for a cab to pull up alongside me.
Again I have no idea how I got here, clearly I'm unable to focus on anything around me for longer than a few seconds unless it somehow relates to Monica. I seem to function without thinking when a cab stops in front of me because before I know it my suitcase has been packed into the trunk and I'm sat in the back, my head once again filled with Monica and finally being home.
The weight of being away from Monica has lifted knowing she'll be in my arms again within the hour, it's been replaced though with the thought of having to leave again in 3 days.
Why can I never let myself enjoy the time I actually have at home rather than making myself dread having to leave the entire time?
It's only a little past 1am and still New York City seems to be wide awake, that's if it ever sleeps. The blinking lights comfort me in ways I don't even know how to describe, it's as if they've become apart of me, just like Monica has, that leaving the city and my beautiful wife behind even just for a few days somehow makes me feel completely lost.
I don't even know who I am without Monica, she's the first and last thing I think about every single day without fail, she completes me and without her I feel like I've lost a huge chunk of myself, of my personality. She's been apart of my life since 1987 and now 15 years later she's the biggest part of my life, nothing is more important than Monica, she is my whole world and god I love her more than anything.
I never thought it was possible to actually love someone this much and then to top it all off have someone feel that exact same way about me. As if Chandler Muriel Bing being in love with someone wasn't big enough already, someone- a Mrs Monica Bing to be precise, loves him as much as he loves her.
Not just loves him though! Loves him enough to move in with him, become engaged to him, marry him, prepare to have children with him, put up with all his stupid insecurities and flaws- which she happens to find adorable anyway. Well at least that's what she tells me!
I know she's telling the truth though simply because it's the exact same way I feel about all her flaws- not that I'd call them flaws because being neurotic, motherly, and competitive is what makes Monica who she is and I love her for that.
The fact that we're the complete opposites of each other is what makes us work so well and I truly think it's one of the reasons why our relationship has survived this long and is still going strong. Being friends for over 10 years first benefitted us hugely too- Mon knew everything about me prior to us getting together, just like I did with her, and that's probably the sole reason why we've gotten this far.
Next year will be our 5 year anniversary- 2nd of marriage, and I can't wait for the next step to finally happen, for that day when Mon is finally able to tell me that the test was positive, that's she pregnant with our baby. For that day when I'm stood in the delivery room as Mon delivers our child, watching as the doctor announces whether it's a boy or a girl as she places our baby into Monica's arms. That day when finally Monica and I are parents, completely responsible for the life of one tiny person, the day when we start the rest of our lives together as a family, as the Bing's.
Just the image of a mini-Monica stood in the kitchen beside Mon, our son resting on her hip, flour dotted across all of their faces as Mon helps our daughter add the correct amount of each ingredient, helping our son mix all the ingredients together as she kisses his head of sandy brown hair, praising them both as she slides the tray of cookies into the oven settling both children on the floor, both of them immediately scrambling to watch over their creations.
I never thought I'd ever want to be a Dad and have children, now it's all I want for my future- that and to grow old with Monica. I'm itching to finally have that little person call me Daddy and Monica Mommy.
God I'm beyond scared though.
I have no idea how to be that person who another human depends entirely upon for the first part of their life. What if I mess up? I quickly dismiss that thought because I know Monica won't let me, we'll learn everything together and we'll be the best parents we can possibly be. I'll be there at every assembly, every sports game, I'll be that embarrassing parent on the front row who claps and cheers the loudest with the camera in hand taking as many photos as humanly possible.
I never got that growing up. Sure I had the embarrassing parents but never in the way I intend to be to my children. My parents were always too busy to care about me and what I was up to ninety-nine percent of the time and I will never stoop to their level, ever, when it comes to my children, and I'm one hundred and one percent sure that I will never abandon my children because I'm gay and leaving to headline a gay burlesque show in Las Vegas.
As much as I love my parents and respect their decision to get divorced now that I'm older and am finally able to realise that it really was the best solution at the time, it's still hard for me to trust them. I know both my parents will jump at the chance of finally being grandparents, I know they'll compete to buy gifts every holiday, trying to be my child's favourite, and I know I can't do anything about that because I know it's who they are but it'll take a lot of work for me to be able to trust them to be alone with my children.
Maybe that'll change when I do actually become a Dad but right now I can't even imagine ever leaving my child with anyone, not even any of our friends, and I'm pretty sure that establishes that I'm going to be one of those fathers who stands ready with a shotgun every time his baby girl goes on a date.
That's a long way off for now though. Maybe things will change over time and I'll learn to become more laid back, especially considering Mon will probably adopt the role of the stricter parent, I'll be the good guy.
Although I do think parenthood will make Mon a lot more carefree and less controlling, if it doesn't then I'll just have to teach our kids to either deal with it or ignore it completely, although I don't think Mon will appreciate the latter.
She'll definitely appreciate me being home though.
I hand a wad of bills to the driver before scrambling out the door, retrieving my suitcase from the trunk before turning to move towards the entrance. A quick glimpse into Central Perk reveals complete darkness, as expected at this time, although you never know what to expect in New York City.
I don't think I've ever moved so fast in my life because before I know it I'm inside, the door unlocked with a quick 4-digit code and I'm racing up the several flights of stairs, trying to be as quiet as possible so as not to wake the neighbours.
My heart rate seems to increase dramatically as I stand between the doors to apartment 19 and 20, fumbling with my keys knowing that Monica locks the apartment door the nights I'm not home.
Everything finally falls back into place as I turn the key in the lock, stepping into place I've called home for a lot longer than I've actually lived here. Abandoning my suitcase by the door and my briefcase on the dinning table, I guide myself towards our bedroom door, which is slightly ajar, using only the light of the moon that streams through the bay window.
Pushing the door open fully I can't help myself as I grin like some sort of maniac at finally being able to see my beautiful wife again, even though she's currently dead to the world, completely oblivious to the fact that her husband is home.
If she knew she'd have jumped me already!
I stand in the doorway for several moments admiring Monica's sleeping form. She's curled up on her side, facing out towards me on her side of the bed, wearing one of my shirts- a slightly washed out blue one that she forces me into wearing again when it loses 'my smell', and a pair of mismatched socks- one white, one grey. Her hair falls across her face slightly blocking most of my view of her gorgeous features, one of her arms is tucked under her pillow while the other rests out in front of her, both of her legs curled up into her body.
From her current position on top of the covers I can see all this perfectly but also determine that she'd attempted to stay up until I got home- as I'd predicted she'd fallen asleep after the exhaustion of the past few days had caught up with her.
I close the bedroom door as quietly as humanly possible before removing my shoes followed closely by my suit and pants, leaving me in only a pair of boxers and...
Mismatched socks.
Pretty sure this proves we were always meant to be, that it was always going to be the 2 of us from the very beginning.
Smiling at that thought I slowly make my way over to our bed- god how much I've missed this bed in all it's comfortableness and glory, but god how much I've missed sleeping with Monica beside me even more than that.
Giving a gentle tug to the duvet I successfully free it from under Monica's body draping it across her. Climbing under the covers too I try not to jostle the bed too much, not wanting to wake Monica when she looks so peaceful. I settle down behind my wife, wrapping my arms around her waist pulling her towards me as gently as I can, spooning her against my chest.
"Chandler...?"
So much for trying not to wake her, although Mon is a very light sleeper, I'm surprised me pulling the duvet from under her didn't disturb her sleep.
"Yeah baby it's me. Sorry for waking you, go back to sleep" I whisper pressing a kiss into her hair.
"Welcome home" She mumbles and I can see the hint of a smile playing on her lips as she attempts to turn in my arms.
"Go to sleep baby" I say softly tightening my arms around her, "I'll still be here in the morning"
"No" She groans softly fighting my arms, "I wanna kiss you" She mutters still half asleep as I finally relax, smiling at her reasoning as she turns to face me.
"Hey Gorgeous" I smile brushing her hair from her face.
"Hey Handsome" She counters before closing the small amount of space between us pressing a kiss to my lips.
We get lost in our kiss for a moment, exhaustion the last thing on our minds as her lips press against mine softly, asking nothing more or nothing less of me.
Finally we break apart and I move to pull her closer to me, if that's at all possible. She yawns as she rests her head on my chest, intertwining her limbs with mine. Her yawn seems to be catching as i yawn too, pressing a final kiss to the top of her head before allowing my eyes to close peacefully.
Life may not be perfect right now but in this moment it almost feels like nothing's wrong. Like we could lay here forever and everything would just go on around us, letting us continue this moment forever.
God- I'm the luckiest man alive.
And I know it won't feel like that in a couple of days when I have to leave again but at the end of the day I actually have a job. Yes I hate it, but some people aren't lucky enough to be able to earn money for themselves. And most of all I have Monica.
The distance will never be a problem, nothing will ever be a problem, as long as I have Monica beside me at the end to the day.