Warning: Inaccurate Portrayal of Espionage

The Story of How Cisco Met Barry, As Told by Their Disgruntled Employer

"Ramon, this isn't why I called you into my office."

"Oh, I know, but it's my personal mission in life to waste at least one hour of your morning every day and we're only," he looked at the nonexistent watch on his wrist, "forty five minutes in."

"I really don't know why I put up with this."

"'Cause you love me like the son you never wanted."

"That's not it."

"And because of that video you don't want anyone to see."

"That's it."

Cisco lifted his feet up to rest on Harrison's desk, only to have them promptly pushed off, not that this deterred him from continuing his one sided conversation about the cute guy he'd been stalking at the coffee shop.

So far, Harrison was privilege to the man's favorite movies and childhood cartoons, hobby of choice, the color he wore most often, that his best friend was his foster sister whom he'd had a crush on when they were teenagers, and was now married with a three year old daughter named Rose, that his foster father was a police officer, that the young man in question had a serious addiction to caffeine and chocolate, probably in that order, and that his favorite holiday was Valentine's Day because he was a hopeless romantic.

How Cisco had managed to get that much information in only two weeks and without saying one single word to the subject of his infatuation or using the Company computers was beyond Harrison. However, it was one of the many reasons he grudgingly and privately considered the boy one of his top agents.

"So, to continue, on top of all that, this guy is a major hottie. Not jacked like Jay or anything, but tall and cute in that skinny geek way that is just… and when he smiles… seriously, I could eat him up. I want to eat him up – like one of those cinnamon rolls they cover in too much icing."

"Ramon…"

"Anyway, the point is, I'm thinking about asking him out."

"And?"

"And advice." Cisco leaned forward in his seat. "Come on. You've been married and I haven't been in the game in… ever. I mean, I've dated, but never anything serious and I'm getting older…"

"You're twenty-four."

"I want something more serious and he could be serious. He's everything I could ever want in another human being that I've never actually talked to. Harry, please?"

Harrison took a deep breath, then closed his eyes and took another. "Be yourself, Ramon. No cheesy pick up lines, no gimmicks, no personas. If you want to be serious, then you want him to like you for you, not someone you pretend to be to get into his pants."

Cisco nodded curtly. "Good, okay, now; how do I do that?"

"I'm sure you can figure out how to be you."

"I haven't been me since you recruited me out of highschool. I've been a poolboy, a DJ, a limo driver, a drug addict, a drug dealer, an underpaid prostitute, a tattoo artist – oh, speaking of, I'm pretty sure I saw my handiwork on Bad Ink. I've been everyone but me."

"You are the person who wastes hours of my time every week updating me on the latest shows that I care nothing about. You insist on breaking every dress code we have with your vast t-shirt collection. You are responsible for the ant-infestation of 2012 because you decided to hide no less than thirty pounds of Twizzlers, two hundred Blowpops, and what I can only describe as an army of Sour Patch Kids in various air vents throughout the office because people kept stealing from the 'stash' in your drawer."

"They were." Harrison tightened his grip on his pen. "Sorry."

"To continue, you insisted that if no one could figure out what movie you were quoting, someone had to put a dollar in the quote jar and when that jar reached an adequate amount, you bought a karaoke machine for the break room. You used an entire year's worth of vacation, not to mention several thousand dollars, to nurse an injured cat back to health simply because you found it on your fire escape, claiming that meant, and I quote, 'he chose me.' You threw Snow a surprise party and when she discharged her weapon into the crowd of people who had jumped out at her yelling "surprise!" you paid Linda's deductible and drove her to physical therapy for two months. You will never hear me say this again, Ramon, but you have many admirable qualities. I'm sure you'll do fine."

"That's… thank you."

"Now, about your latest assignment?"

"Right." Cisco reached down and pulled a folder out from under his leg. "I wrote the report up last night. Pictures and everything. You do not want to know what I had to do to get a close up of that birthmark, by the way. Speaking of which, I've got a picture of the hottie."

He set the folder down and turned on his phone, holding it out. The background had been set to a picture taken from some distance of a young man with green eyes, brown hair, and a truly disarming smile, petting a dog on the sidewalk while he talked with the owner.

"You stalked him, took pictures of him without his knowledge, and then set one of those pictures as the background to your phone and you don't even know his full name?"

Cisco shrugged. "Considering what I do for a living, that's not even the creepiest thing I've done this week."

A valid point and one Harrison wasn't going to explore at the moment. "Rathaway asked me to send you to him when we were done."

"Did he say what he needed me for?"

"Something about his latest pet project – I try not to ask." Plausible deniability was his best friend when it came to Hartley. The young man was an undeniable genius, but Harrison often had cause to question his ethics.

"Well, does he wants my help or am I gonna get shot again?"

"As I said, I try not to ask, however, this is Rathaway, so fifty-fifty."

"Man!" Cisco mumbled under breath in Spanish as he stomped out of the office and headed down to the hall to Hartley's lab. Despite the front of animosity between them, the two actually worked very well together, albeit with a lot of bickering.

[]

"Dr. Wells, your two o'clock is here." Ah, the new transfer. He'd come highly recommended by Supervisory Agent Grant in National City, where he'd been since she recruited him out of college. According to her, he'd recently expressed an interest in returning to Central City to spend more time with his family and while Harrison was reluctant, he had enough respect and trust in Agent Grant to agree to the transfer.

"Send him in."

A knock was quickly followed by the door opening and in that moment, Harrison found himself cursing deities he didn't even believe in, because the person standing in the doorway was none other than the young man Cisco had been stalking for the past few weeks.

"Have a seat, Agent…?"

"Allen. Barry Allen." Allen took an overstuffed file folder out of the messenger bag he had slung over his shoulder. "Sorry about the secrecy, but I guess you're used to that."

"Indeed. Have a seat." With field agents that worked exclusively undercover, it was common for no picture or given name to be attached to file. A codename only was applied and Harrison honestly hadn't been entirely sure the agent in question was even a man – Agent Grant's use of masculine pronouns aside, the Flash was less gender specific than Supergirl. "How are you enjoying being back in Central City?"

"Oh, it's been great! I found an apartment in the city, a great coffee shop not too far from it and a stalker. I'm actually really excited about that. I've never had a stalker before. I mean, I should probably be freaked out or something, but it's not like I can't handle myself and he's super cute – trying to be sneaky, taking pictures of me when he thinks I'm not looking. Besides, with what I do for a living, who am I to judge, right? And that is way more information than you needed. Sorry. I over share when I'm nervous."

Harrison couldn't quite manage to stop the smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth. Damn. Barry Allen was absolutely charming. Cisco and him were perfect for each other.

"You do realize, Agent Allen, that you have nothing to be nervous about? The transfer's already complete, you have the job."

Barry blushed a little and ducked his head, smiling. "I know, but this is my first new job since Agent Grant recruited me and, I mean, with your reputation… it's a little intimidating."

Harrison could see his doom in too big eyes, filled with sincerity and genuine hero-worship. "Allow me to make it less intimidating. Would you like a tour of the facility?"

[]

"I can not stress this enough." Harrison looked around his office at the cluster of apprehensive, confused faces. "They are not to know about each other."

There was a moment of silence, and then Caitlin asked hesitantly. "I'm sorry, but why?"

Her question appeared to break the tenuous silence that had settled over the room when he'd invited them in for an incredibly important, top secret meeting that Cisco must not know about. Jay relaxed into his chair. "Yeah, why is that? I've only met him once, but he seems like a nice kid. Cisco and him would really hit it off."

Hartley nodded his agreement. "And he's bi, so people can finally stop asking when Cisco and I are going to 'give it up and start banging already.' And by, people, I mean you, Jay."

Jay grinned, but didn't deny the accusation.

Caitlin turned on Hartley sharply. "Please tell me you didn't hit on the new guy his first day here?"

"No, of course not. Linda tried to hook us up."

Linda Park, Harrison's Personal Assistant/Operations Coordinator, rolled her eyes from her position at the back of the room. "Which you rudely refused."

Caitlin shook her head in wonder. "Your gay-dar is spot on. I swear, you just know."

She beamed. "It's a gift."

Hartley was less than impressed. "Gay-dar, yes, however, it's your matchmaking skills that I find questionable. I've told you time and again that I will not date a fellow agent. It's just too complicated."

Jay scoffed. "Yeah, but you're barely an agent."

"That's enough!" Harrison slammed his fist on the table. "This has nothing to do with whether Ramon and Allen would get along. In fact, I'm certain they would, which is precisely the reason I won't let it happen."

Caitlin opened and closed her mouth a few times before she was able to put her words together. "How? They work together, in the same building and I know we're good, but even we're not that good."

"No, but I am." Garrick raised a skeptical eyebrow. "One of the driving reasons behind my agreeing to this transfer was that Allen's foster father works within the CCPD as a detective and is aware of his son's true profession…"

Jay finished for him, "And we need a new in with local law enforcement."

"Precisely. Agent Allen will be working part time as a CSI with the CCPD. Detective West will help to maintain that cover. The only time he will be here is when he's being briefed and de-briefed."

Linda snorted into her hand and covered the laughter with a cough. "Sorry. Allergies."

Caitlin was barely containing her own smile and slapped Jay on the shoulder when he wagged his eyebrows suggestively. "Not that I'm questioning your leadership, but why does it matter if they know they work together?"

"I won't have them making out all over S.T.A.R. Labs and my desk."

Jay frowned. "Why would they be making out on your desk?

"Because this is Ramon we're talking about. He will do whatever it takes to get on my last nerve."

"Fair point."

"Not to mention what he'd do to poor Hartley's lab."

Hartley, who had been whispering something to Linda about acceptable times to play matchmaker, turned back around in his seat. "Wait, what about my lab?"

"He'll probably use it to develop more efficient lubricant or something equally as ludicrous."

Hartley raised an eyebrow. "I'm not entirely against that."

"And he'll test it in your storage closet."

"No. If anyone's getting laid in my storage closet, it's me!"

"That's right!" Jay held up a fist and Hartley shook his head. "Come on, don't leave me hanging."

"I don't fist bump."

"Hart. Hartley. The Hart-man. Hartmon. Pied Piper. Piper of Pieds. Pipes."

"Deodamnatus! If I fist bump, will you stop?"

"Only one way to find out." Jay held the fist out invitingly and Hartley cringed, but bumped Jay's fist lightly with his own. "There you go. That wasn't so bad, was it?"

Hartley shuddered. "I feel dirty."

Harrison barely managed to refrain from throwing something. "The directive to keep Ramon and Allen apart at S.T.A.R. Labs will be referred to as Operation Platypus."

Linda raised her hand enthusiastically. "Oh, oh, what about Operation Blueberry?"

Hartley rolled his eyes. "Could you be more obvious? It has his name in it."

"That's the idea. He'll never suspect it's about him if it has his name."

"Really? Why don't we just call it Operation 'Quick, Hide Cisco!'?"

Linda gave him the finger and Harrison's eye twitched.

Caitlin appeared to be thinking it over, gently chewing her lip. "What if we used a berry, just not one with the word berry in it?"

"Like what?"

"Red Currant?"

Jay shook his head. "We already have an ongoing operation Red Currant."

"We do?" Caitlin looked up and slightly left. "No, I don't think… really? Linda?"

Linda abruptly stop making the abort signal as Caitlin turned around and attempted to look natural with her hand up and by her shoulder. "No, no, we don't. No Operation Red Currant that you were never supposed to hear about, thank you very much, Jay."

Caitlin stared at her, eyes narrowing. Linda moved two feet to the left to put Jay between them.

Harrison felt his urge to throw something increase exponentially, but that would only encourage them. "It's Operation Platypus, end of discussion."

"But why?"

"Because it's unnatural and a clear sign that God, if he or she does exist, has a sick, twisted sense of humor."

Jay rolled his eyes. "You need to get laid – desperately – but, fine, you're the boss. Operation Platypus is a go."

[]

Of course, Operation Platypus was only going to be affective within the walls of S.T.A.R. Labs and Harrison could no more stop Cisco from doing something than he could stop a Tornado with the power of his stare. He could try, but it would only end in disaster and leave him feeling disappointed in his own inadequacies. There were times, however few and far between, when it was better to have never tried than to fail.

As such, he wasn't entirely unsurprised when, two days later, Cisco burst into his office, grinning manically. "I did it!"

"You finished the prototype that's been sitting on your desk for three months?"

"Uh, no." Cisco scoffed, closing the door behind him. "If I finish that, you'll just give me another boring project."

"You're a mechanical engineer, Cisco. I have to justify your continued employment somehow."

"Then give me something fun to work on. I'm young. I need to be stimulated."

Harrison looked up from his computer. "I refuse to stimulate you."

"Anyway, so not the reason I'm here. I took your advice and asked him out, as myself."

"And?"

"And I put my foot in it. It was horrible and embarrassing. There were Harry Potter references, Star Trek quotes may or may not have been thrown out there, and I briefly considered swallowing my own tongue to end my misery, but then he said yes and asked if I knew any good karaoke bars. We talked for an hour and he ordered a drink with enough caffeine and sugar to neutralize a small elephant and I think I'm already in love."

Of course he was. Harrison forced himself to smile. "Are you done?"

"Yes. No. He just moved here from National City and he's starting a job as a CSI. He has multiple degrees and not like that time I dated a hair dresser that had certificates in both cut and color. Harry, we can have real conversations."

"You had real conversations with the stylist. She taught you how to manage your hair."

"And she'll always have a special place in my heart for that."

"Mine, as well, although, I'll admit to a certain amount of disappointment that we never had the chance to initiate Operation Mercy Kill. It was the first time I'd ever seen the team really work together for a common goal."

"What goal was that?"

"The severing of your man-bun. They'd even agreed to let Hartley do the honors."

Cisco's hand moved involuntarily to his hair, stroking it protectively. "Seriously?! There's nothing wrong with a man-bun!"

"Is a phrase only ever uttered by people who wear man-buns."

"Don't think I won't bring it back."

"Don't think I won't re-initiate Operation Mercy Kill. It could be Hartley's Christmas bonus."

They stared off for several minutes, but it was Cisco who broke eye contact with an over-exaggerated groan. "Fine, whatever, I don't want the man-bun, anyway. I'm just saying, when I told Barry I was a mechanical engineer, he was all over it."

Only Harrison's years as a covert operative stopped him from tensing. While his agents maintained their employment at S.T.A.R. Labs as cover, it was also common practice not to discuss their place of employment with anyone outside of the facility. If pressed, the official line was that they worked at a private research facility. It often led to complications in their personal lives, but Harrison doubted he'd get lucky enough for that to deter Barry.

"We spent half the time talking about physics. He totally gets it, like he's not just putting up with it so he can get in my pants later. He's really interested in what I have to say. Not that he doesn't want to get in my pants – I caught him staring at my ass on the way out, so, yeah, I'm in there. Oh, hey, when is it socially acceptable to sleep with someone you want to have a serious relationship with? I'm thinkin' first date is too soon, but what about the second and what if we go on two dates in the same weekend, does that count as the same date?"

Harrison tapped his pen on the desk impatiently. "You do realize I actually have work to do? S.T.A.R. Labs isn't just a front. I have to turn a profit or I answer to a board of directors, none of whom are aware of my other affiliation, and who would be well within their rights to fire me. Now, was there anything else, or were you just…"

His phone beeped loudly followed by Linda's voice, monotone in its treachery. "Dr. Wells, you have a platypus on line two."

Cisco stared at the phone incredulously. "A what?"

The phone beeped again. "You heard me."

"Harry, what is she…"

Harrison was already out of his chair, though, ushering Cisco across the room and through the door, shutting it in his face as he sputtered questions.

He took a moment to pull his thoughts together before answering the call. "Allen, what can I do for you?"

"I was wondering when I could stop by for my physical? I have the next few days free, so I thought…"

He'd forgotten about the physical. How had he forgotten? It was mandatory before Barry could go out in the field, but if he came in now, he was bound to run into Cisco.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Snow isn't feeling well and there's really no rush. You'll have to complete your two month probationary period first."

"Right, of course, sorry. I'll get back with you next week. I hope she feels better."

This was going to be more difficult than he'd thought.

[]

"Ramon, I really don't have time for…"

"Okay, so, hypothetically, if you have sex on the first date, that doesn't mean it isn't a serious relationship, right? Like, it doesn't change anything other than the fact that now I know he has a six pack and a throat that can make me forget the English language."

Harrison moved his pen through his fingers in an effort not to throw it. "Explain to me, in detail, how you've made it this far into adulthood without getting killed?"

Cisco pulled the absurd Blowpop out of his mouth and grinned. "Not for lack of trying, am I right? Remember the time I thought the Russian double agent was a high priced escort? The look on your face when she tried to stab me? Priceless. No, but seriously, it's still good, though, right? Because I want it to be good. Do you know what we did after sex? We discussed the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow. He knows Monty Python. He has it memorized, Harry. We stayed in bed reciting every line and after that, we had sex again. Which brings me to my next hypothetic. If you spend an entire weekend with someone you've only gone on one date with and the only time you leave the bed is for food and a shower, can it still be serious?"

He threw the pen and Cisco wisely ran out of the room, yelling something about HR and abuse.

"Not to be pushy, Dr. Wells, but I'm getting near the end of my probation and I'd really like to get the physical out of the way so you can put me on the roster for field work."

"No."

"Uh… okay, but can I ask why?"

"You sound congested."

There was a lengthy pause. "Congested?"

"There's no use taking the physical if you're not a hundred percent, Allen."

"I'm not sick. Actually, I almost never get sick. I don't even really have allergies, so…"

"Get some rest and call back in a few days."

"But…"

Harrison hung up the phone and dropped his head to his desk.

[]

Why had he never realized how much time Cisco spent in S.T.A.R. Labs? He was always there, even when Harrison didn't think he was and he was never doing what he was supposed to. He could be anywhere at any time and the physical took three days minimum. There was no way he could hide Barry from Cisco inside of S.T.A.R. Labs for three days and no way he could keep Cisco out for that amount of time. Unless…

He pressed the intercom. "Linda!"

"What?!"

"Get in here!" She groaned, but dutifully marched the three feet to his door. "I need to send Ramon out on an assignment."

"Didn't he just get back from one a few months ago?"

"Allen needs to have his physical and I can't risk them bumping into each other."

"Okay, but our only open assignment is in Russia."

"Then send him to Russia.

Linda hesitated. "Are you sure? We already have an agent there under cover and Cisco has a history with Russia. Like, the entire country. Every time he goes there, he gets into trouble. Remember when he was on vacation and stumbled across a human trafficking ring? Or the time he accidently slept with the son of a mafia boss? Or, my personal favorite, when he tried to convince the double agent it was okay he'd mistaken her for a prostitute because he wasn't thinking 'the cheap kind you get off the street, more like the really expensive ones that come to your hotel room.' The look on your face when she tried to stab him…"

"Linda…"

"I'm just saying there's a reason we all agreed to keep him out of Russia."

"Put a package together for Stein and have Cisco deliver it. That gets him out of the office for a few weeks and he isn't actually engaging the enemy. He should be fine."

"Yeah, but Cisco. In Russia."

"Send him."

[]

When Linda walked into his office two and half weeks later with a smug smile and two folders in hand, Harrison knew what she was going to say before she said it. Of course, he'd hoped he was wrong.

"Yes, Linda?"

"I've got good news and better news. What do you want first?"

"I will not hesitate to shoot you."

She rolled her eyes and approached him, setting the folders on his desk. "Agent Allen passed his physical with flying colors and is officially on the roster for upcoming missions. And might I add. Yum. Seriously, I would hit that in less than a heart beat. Too bad he's hopelessly devoted to his mystery boyfriend I've never met."

"Boyfriend?" It shouldn't come as a surprise really. They'd been seeing each other exclusively for nearly two months.

"Oh yeah, it's been official since the second date or the first, depending on who you ask. So, now, the better news. Remember when I said sending Cisco to Russia was a bad idea? Yeah, Agent Stein just called an extraction in for him and you know what that means."

He closed his eyes in a futile attempt to block her out.

"I get to say," she took a deep breath in, "I told you so. You hear me? I told you so. I. Told. You. So. God, just like sex, it gets better every time."

"Are you done?"

"No, hold on." She dropped her voice to a whisper. "I told you so."

"…"

"And now I'm done. I already dispatched the team. We should have Cisco back by tomorrow."

[]

His door flung open and he had just enough time to register Caitlin Snow in the doorway, whispering, "Platypus, platypus, platypus!" as Barry came in, staring at her in confusion.

"I'm sorry were just saying platypus?"

She blinked at him a few times before answering, "Yes. Yes, I was," then crossed her arms over her chest and stared at Barry with her lips tightly sealed.

Barry stared back, clearly expecting some kind of explanation that she had no intention of giving.

Harrison cleared his throat loudly enough to get the young man's attention. "You wanted to see me, Allen?"

"Huh? Oh!" Barry glanced at Caitlin again, but she clearly wasn't moving from the doorway, so he sat down and lowered his voice. "It's about my boyfriend."

Of course it was. "Your boyfriend?"

"Right, um, he works for a lab doing research and he went to Switzerland for three weeks to help with a study and when he came back, two of his fingers were broken." Harrison didn't need to be the head of a team of spies to know where this was going, but he was and he did. "He says some of the guys took him skiing and there was an accident, but the thing is, I got a look at his x-rays and the breaks are clean; almost like they were professional. In fact, if I didn't know better, I'd say it was done by the Russians, but…"

"Let me stop you right there, Allen. I highly doubt your boyfriend ran afoul of Russian Interpol while doing research in the Swiss Alps." It had, in fact, been a small town outside of Moscow.

Barry's frown deepened. "I guess."

Harrison allowed himself an indulgent sigh. "If it would make you feel better, I can look into it."

There was instant relief and Barry relaxed into his chair. "That would be great. It's just… I get the feeling he's hiding something. The injuries aren't really consistent with a skiing accident."

"I'll let you know what I find. In the meantime, why don't you and Agent Snow go out? Get to know each other a little better?"

Caitlin's eyes widened in panic, but she managed to smother it with a welcoming smile before Barry turned around. They needed to distract him from his concern and a night out would do just that.

She shrugged. "Sure, why not."

Barry hesitated, but gave in. "Okay, but promise you'll look into it? His name is Francisco Ramon, date of birth…"

"I have your boyfriend on file, Allen. Go, have fun."

[]

"Dr. Wells, have you seen Caitlin? I've been with accounting all day and we finally sorted out the expenses, but there are a few receipts I need her to sign off on."

"She went out with Barry." Linda stared at him in utter silence until he finally looked up. "What?"

"Where did they go?"

"Out? She's distracting him from his concern over Cisco's injuries. I'm fairly certain I heard Barry mention karaoke."

Linda pressed a hand to her hip, eyes narrowed in a glare. "You realize Caitlin has stage fright and the only way she's getting up there is with large amounts of alcohol?"

"Probably. Why would that…" matter. Oh, dear god. "Operation Red Currant."

Linda groaned out her frustration for a full five seconds before pressing the blue tooth in her ear. "Jay Garrick. Jay, we have a Red Currant. I don't know, but she's with Barry and there's karaoke involved. Well, that's your job and one of the many reasons I've never signed up to be a field agent."

She crossed her arms over her chest maintaining unwavering and accusing eye contact with Harrison as Jay spoke in her ear. "Then you can debrief the witnesses when she gets drunk and starts regaling the entire bar with details of her missions as a super secret spy, 'Shhhh, don't tell anyone.' Uh hu, that's what I thought. Take Hartley. Because you're too polite to tell people to fuck off, that's why."

And despite being her superior, Harrison felt suddenly very small under her piercing glare.

[]

Thankfully, they were able to locate them in time to run interference. While Harrison would have argued that staying until last call, getting hammered and singing a range of James Bond songs was not under the scope of Operation Red Currant, he couldn't argue its effectiveness. It had, among other things, impressed upon Barry the importance of said Operation, whereby Caitlin's low alcohol tolerance should be deemed a threat to national security, but they all loved her too much to let that happen.

Barry, on the other hand, had the tolerance of an eight hundred pound gorilla. He drank even Jay Garrick under the table and apparently had no hangover to speak of when Linda dropped by the CCPD to check on him the next morning, which was, as far as Harrison was concerned, definitive proof that there was no such thing as karma.

[]

"You have a pet platypus."

Harrison looked up at Cisco who'd marched in and slapped his palms on the wooden surface of his desk as if issuing a challenge. "I'm sorry, what?"

"You have a pet platypus and I will find it."

"Don't be absurd, Ramon."

"I'm not absurd. You're absurd for having a pet platypus. They're dangerous."

"They're not dangerous."

"They're from Australia and everyone knows that anything coming out of Australia has evolved to be terrifying."

"Are you done?"

"With that, yes." Cisco sat down in a chair and made himself comfortable. "So, ask me how my night went."

"I'm not asking how your night went."

"It was awesome, thank you very much! You know how I was all bummed out 'cause Barry had to miss our six month anniversary for that CCPD seminar?"

"Yes and I also distinctly remember telling you that it was ridiculous to celebrate an anniversary at only six months."

Which had, perhaps, been unfair. Despite the heartless demeanor Harrison presented to his employees and the world at large, he did remember what it was like to be young and in love. However, the seminar had been a cover for Barry's first field assignment and Harrison hadn't wanted to fuel Cisco's pouting, especially seeing as he'd chosen to do it in Harrison's office.

"Is there a point, Ramon?"

"Well, he got back late last night and he had a surprise for me." Really? That was the first he'd heard of Barry being back from Opal City. He must have skipped check in and gone straight home to see Cisco. "Tickets to comic-con, the really expensive, all access ones – he's already booked a hotel room and everything. The convention isn't for another six months, Harry, which means he still expects us to be together then."

Silently, Harrison calculated the chances of maintaining Operation Platypus indefinitely. Theoretically, they could manage. The two were so blindly in love with each other they overlooked things that would give even the most novice agent pause.

"I think… Harry, I want to ask him to move in with me."

And just like that the odds dropped dramatically. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why? He practically lives there now. We'd just be making it official."

"Yes, but practically is very different from officially. Practically, if you go off on a mission and get injured, you can come home to an empty apartment and get yourself pulled together before you see him. Officially, means he will be there the moment you walk in the door and there will be no hiding it from him and do we need to go over the secrecy clause of your contract again?"

"You're probably right." Cisco slumped down dejectedly and Harrison almost regretted bursting his happy little bubble.

Thankfully, before the guilt could attempt to settle in, Linda interrupted them. "Dr. Wells, there's a platypus on its way to see you."

"So, you do have a pet platypus."

"I most certainly do not."

"Then what…"

"It's none of your concern, Ramon. Rathaway needs you in his lab."

Cisco cursed, but didn't say anything else as he stormed out of the room. When his footsteps had faded to a reasonable distance, Harrison turned his glare on the smiling Linda. "Why do you insist on making this so difficult?"

She lowered her voice to a whisper. "Because I can."

[]

"Agent Stein!"

At Linda's cry of delight, Harrison came out of his office and indeed, Martin Stein had returned from Russia and was currently wrapped in Linda's overzealous embrace.

"It's good to be back, Linda."

"How was Russia?"

"Productive, as always. I brought presents." He held up the bags in his hands. "Somewhere in there is a Russian National Hockey jersey worn and signed by Pavel Datsyuk. I was assured that was a 'big deal.'"

While she squealed happily, taking the bags from his hands to set them on her desk, Harrison offered his hand in greeting. "Welcome back."

Martin had come out of retirement at the request of the company and Harrison had agreed to take point as the Supervisory Agent, though technically, they were equals. "How have things been in my absence?"

"As well as can be expected."

"I'm to take it that, as you put it, the inmates are still running the asylum?"

"Unfortunately."

There was a soft knock on the door, barely a warning before Caitlin and Cisco came in, both rushing eagerly to hug Martin, exclaiming in unison. "You're back!"

Jay and Hartley were close behind and Harrison watched in amusement while Martin passed out the various souvenirs – an experimental, lab created metal for Cisco; a Venus Fly Trap that had been cross-pollinated with a carrot for Caitlin; the latest on their research into cold fusion for Jay; and for Hartley, "A signed record of a live performance by Alexander Scriabin – arguably the most difficult item to smuggle out of the country, as I had to liberate it from the private collection of a very prominent General."

"Thank you, Agent Stein."

Cisco gawked at the vinyl album that Hartley held with reverence. "I think he missed you most of all, Scarecrow."

Hartley elbows Cisco in the ribs.

"Dick!"

With Cisco nursing his bruised side, Harrison stepped in. "That's enough for now. You can harass Agent Stein when he's been properly debriefed and you're not on the clock."

Linda perked up. "Oh, a dinner party! What about tonight?"

Cisco shook his head. "Can't, I have plans with Barry. Can we do it tomorrow?"

"Barry?" Martin raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Would this be the same young man you were telling me about in Russia."

Cisco's grin as he nodded was a little too enthusiastic.

"That would mean you've been together… nearly ten months now? That's a new record for you, Cisco. Am I to take it this is serious?"

No, absolutely not. Harrison wasn't going to sit through another speech about how perfect Barry Allen was or how much Cisco loved him. "You can discuss Ramon's love life over dinner tomorrow. Now, back to work."

[]

"Operation Platypus, Harrison? Really?"

"What would you have called it?"

"Certainly not that. You really should leave the naming of operations to Cisco, he has such a knack for it."

Harrison would do no such thing. While he had say over the codenames for the agents under his employee, Ramon had taken it upon himself to give some of the more renowned criminal their own codenames.

Captain Cold, indeed. Snart had never looked so smug.

Martin shook his head. "While I find myself reluctantly impressed that you've managed to keep this going for as long as you have, you do realize they will eventually find out and when they do…"

He trailed off, leaving the ramifications to Harrison's imagination. "Of course, I'm aware. However, I intend to enjoy the peace and quiet for as long as I'm allowed."

[]

Cisco sat across from his desk in silence for a full ten minutes before he got up the nerve to speak. "I asked him to move in with me."

"Ramon, we talked about this."

"I know! But it's been a year and I love him and we were in our hotel room at comic-con after meeting George Takei and it just… it slipped out and he said yes and I don't want to take it back. I'm not taking it back. He already put in his one month notice with his landlord."

Harrison put his pen down and pressed his hands together on his desk to show exactly how serious he was. "How exactly do you expect to keep your identity as a spy for this facility a secret if you are living with the man?"

Cisco sat straighter, confident and determined in a way Harrison had rarely seen him and never when it involved someone he was dating. "I don't know, but if Martin Stein can do it, so can I."

[]

"Rathaway, this had better be important." Harrison gripped the phone tightly in his annoyance.

"Yeah, no, it is. Um… Apparently, the Russians found Cisco."

"They what?!" Although, to be fair, if anyone was going to interrupt Harrison about anything during the Company's annual budgetary conference… "How?"

"No idea, but one of the double agents saw pictures of him with Barry going into Cisco's apartment building on the desk of what she described as a very bad man. Sir, I know this isn't a great time, but…"

"I'm in Japan."

"Yes, be that as it may, I need your authorization to do an emergency retrieval and considering they know about Barry…"

"Operation Platypus is in the can. You have my authorization. I'll text Cisco that a helicopter will be waiting for them on the roof in fifteen. I'll be on a plane within the hour."

[]

He left Linda to finish the conference on his behalf and was ascending the narrow steps to the private jet when his phone started buzzing in his back pocket. He expected Cisco, ready to yell obscenities at him for forcing him to unnecessarily lie to his boyfriend for a year. Instead, he saw Hartley's name.

"I'm getting on the plane as we speak. Tell Cisco…"

"They didn't meet up with the helicopter. The apartment was empty. We found Whiskers outside on the balcony."

Cisco never would have allowed that stupid cat out and for all that Harrison complained, loudly and often, he did care about Cisco. The boy was immature, reckless and purposefully annoying, but he was also the closest thing to a son Harrison had.

"Find them."

[]

"They're fine."

He'd been barely stepped foot inside S.T.A.R. Labs before he was intercepted by Caitlin. Harrison had never felt more relieved to hear those words.

"They're in medical right now, a little roughed up, some bruised ribs, but nothing's broken. I gave them IV's and pain killers just to be sure."

"Have they said anything?"

"Not really. Well… Cisco did threaten to shove his foot up your ass, but I'm pretty sure that was metaphorical. Go, apologize if you can manage, and I'll be by to check on them later."

He stepped through the secure doors that led to their private wing and was immediately greeted with stifling silence. Apparently, the other agents had made themselves scarce in an effort to give Cisco and Barry privacy. He stopped just out of site of the door to Caitlin's medical lab and listened to the steady, reassuring beeping of the heart monitors. It wasn't as if Cisco had never been in danger, they faced life or death two, occasionally three times a year, but never this close to home.

The silence was broken Barry, his voice soft and nervous. "Hey."

Cisco's followed shortly after, just as tenuous. "Hey."

A rustling of clothe indicated movement and a moment later, Cisco asked, "What are you doing?"

"Here, shake my hand."

"Why?"

"Just do it."

"Okay, now what?"

"Hi, I'm Barry Allen, codename the Flash due to an incident involving a dare that Supergirl thought I would be too embarrassed to follow through with. Unfortunately, she vastly underestimated my nineteen-year-old-self's need to be accepted by my piers. She swears they erased the security footage, but I have my doubts."

"I was recruited halfway into my first year of college by Agent Cat Grant. My dad was in prison for a crime he didn't commit and the company offered me the money and resources I needed to prove that. When he won his appeal last year, I transferred here to be closer to him and my foster family. I have no car, an apartment I hate, but I'm never there, and an addiction to caffeine that rivals a crack addict."

Cisco chuckled and then groaned in pain.

Barry continued, undeterred. "Seriously, I can't even function in the morning. I literally crawl to the kitchen. I also have an amazing boyfriend that asked me to marry him and I said yes."

"Did you?"

"Yeah, only I'm kind of worried, because I think his cat is trying to kill me."

"Whiskers is not trying to kill you."

"He hides behind the chair and attacks my ankles every time I go to the bathroom."

"That's how he shows his love."

"I'm also really concerned about what you consider an appropriate display of affection." Cisco laughed again, softer. "Now you."

"You want me to…?"

"Mhm."

"Okay, um, hi? I'm Francisco Ramon, but friends call me Cisco. My codename is Vibe because I said so and Harry doesn't have the patience to put up with my bullshit. Full disclosure, I can be really annoying when I want something. He recruited me out of highschool, took me in and supported me when no one else would. My family, they love me, but they don't understand me. He gets me and, yeah, he's a total dick and he throws things at me sometimes…"

"I'm beginning to understand your relationship with Whiskers."

"Shut up." Said with enough affection that Harrison could practically see the smile behind the words. "I have these crazy awesome friends that I've been dying to introduce my boyfriend to. They would totally love him. And I think my boss has a platypus."

"For real?!"

"Yeah, Linda's always rushing in saying it's on the phone or coming to see him and now that I'm saying that out loud, I'm beginning to think it's not really a platypus."

"Bro, I'm pretty sure I'm the platypus."

"That makes a lot more sense."

"So, you still wanna get married?"

"Totally."

"Awesome. Can I kiss you now?"

"If you don't, I'm filing a complaint with HR."

"We have an HR?!"

There was muffled laughter, followed by the unmistakable sound of kissing and Harrison decided against interrupting them. He did, however, position himself at the end of the hallway and wait for Caitlin to return.

She gave him a curious glance, but continued walking without word. Harrison silently counted down as she turned the corner into the room and…

"Cisco, Barry, it time for… oh, my god! That is not… One patient per bed, Agents! Cisco, get your hand out of his pants and, Barry, put your shirt back on! This is a professional clinic!"

And that was the story of how Cisco met Barry and how, for the first time, Harrison got to be the one to say 'I told you so.'

-the end-