Hello!
Before we get started, I have a few things to mention.
First: This is my first fanfiction, so I`ll probably make some mistakes.
Second: This fanfiction is based off real life events, so I apologize if characters seem a bit OOC.
Third: WARNING: Some explicit language, Human names used
Disclaimer: I do not own hetalia or it`s characters.
Let`s get started, then!
September-
"You want to work with me?
"Sure."
October-
"It's kind of hard to imagine we only met a month ago."
"Yeah."
November-
"These are my friends from last year-"
"Nice to meet you."
December-
"Let's do a secret Santa! That's be fun,"
"Let's do it, it does sound fun."
January-
"Happy new year,"
"You too."
February-
It's been a while. Since then, I mean. We became friends fast, it's hard to imagine we've known each other for less than a year. It feels odd. I don't understand. I'm supposed to have a girlfriend, but I'm questioning myself.
But I think I've come to a conclusion.
Hey Antonio... you there?
Yeah. Sorry
It's okay... I just wanted to say something.
Ok. Go Ahead
Lovino. I'm kinda worried. Is something wrong?
I don't know if you care... but you're the one person I actually trust. But don't tell the others, I'll tell them when I want to
I promise
...Thank you
Lovino. What's wrong?
Nothing's wrong... I just need to day this
Ok. Go ahead.
i'm bisexual.
That was it. He knows. But I trust him.
Although, I don't think that's the truth. I think I'm just lying to myself because I want to be at least a little "normal"?
Yay!
?
Two bisexuals and a gay, Yay for sexual Diversity!
...I stopped. Two bisexuals. Me and Francis. And A Gay. Nobody came out as gay. How does that work out?
Who's the gay one? No one's come out recently.
Umm...
Can you tell me? I'd like to know, I'm a bit confused.
Me. I am. But... I'm sorry.
Why are you sorry?
I just am.
...?
You... were a good friend, but I've ruined it. Sorry.
Antonio.
Please don't go.
Antonio
Please
Antonio
Antonio
Please listen
I have something to tell you
Antonio
Please it's urgent
it's important
Antonio
Damnit. Had I lost him? Why did this have to be so complicated. I don't even know why I'm scared to lose Antonio. He's not mine, I'm not his, so why? But I really hope he didn't leave. I wouldn't be able to handle that.
Yes?
Thank the lord.
Please just listen. I just... want to say something.
Lovino. If I'm to be completely honest there's one more thing I've got to say first
Yes?
The reason I know you'll hate me is because... you're my best friend, but I also like you.
Antonio... I was going to say the same thing...
Everyone loves their friends Lovino, but that's not what I meant.
Listen, Antonio, I've been having a lot different thoughts, and I know I'm supposed to have a girlfriend. But I know I like you. Like... more than a friend.
I've got to go. See you later.
Ugh. Goddamn Antonio. Why'd he have to be so fucking oblivious? However I don't feel right. Besides the fact that I can clearly feel my face burning, and the corners of my eyes are kind of stinging, but something just doesn't feel right.
Well. I can think about it later. Maybe.
No! I will think about it later. I have school tomorrow, I'll see Antonio then.
I arrived at school early. I always do, so it's not a surprise. My friend group has a corner we like to go to so we can meet up before school.
I decide to pace around, I don't know If I want to see Antonio today or not. As I peer out from behind the corner, I can see Gilbert and Francis on their way over. I can hear them laughing, their respective laughs sticking out against the other voices around me. I put on the best face I can to prove I don't have problems and that I'm not overtired.
"Kesese, Lovi! What's been going on?" Gilbert's voice is kind of annoying at first, but you get used to it.
"Not much." I can only answer that, there's no way Gilbert or Francis know anything, Antonio wouldn't say anything.
"There's Arthur and Antonio." Francis waved happily. I sigh and sit down against the wall. Again, I can hear Antonio laughing, and quick footsteps lead me to believe that he's running over. I close my eyes.
" G-good morning Lovi!~" Antonio called. I try to look up, but I can't meet his eye. "Morning, Antonio."
I can feel Francis wanting to say something, but the bell rings, and he laughs and goes off with Gilbert and Antonio. I pick up my bag and go over to Arthur, and we walk back to the doors silently.
Arthur and I don't speak much, we haven't known each other too long. Francis recently "adopted" him into the friend group, just as Antonio did with me back in November.
I squeeze my way in the doors after Arthur. And a few other people. Actually after a lot of people, I don't like pushing people out of my way, it feels wrong. But, I'm in, so I head down the hall to my locker. Number 13. Ironic, I get the unlucky number. But I'm not complaining. Undoing my lock, I pull the door open and hold the lock in my teeth like always, I have a weird habit of holding my lock like this, don't judge. I keep all my school things in my locker, my bag is just for transporting my art supplies, since I like to draw during breaks. I throw my bag in (Kind of carelessly), and pull out my math binder and pencil case.
Before Antonio can stop to wait for me, I hurry upstairs to the math room.
I forgot we sit beside each other.
Shoving my things in the desk, I pull my bangs (can you call them that?) in front of my face and look down. I can hear the chair next to me get pulled out then back in.
"How are you, Lovi?" Antonio whispers to me.
"Don't call me that, you bastard." I murmur, almost indecipherably back.
Antonio doesn't say anything to me for the rest of the period.
As soon as the period is over, I grab my things and leave. Not because of Antonio, but because I actually fucking hate that math classroom. And I have art next. "Lovino! Wait up!" Antonio calls behind me. I stop, but don't face him. He joins me, and we go back downstairs to the art room. It`s actually our homeroom, which is nice I guess? Everyone goes in and we take our seats.
We're working on a carving/stamping unit, where we carve something out of a small rubbery square, then we stamp it with ink on a piece of paper.
Everyone gets their things out, and starts carving. It's pretty loud in the classroom, except my table. My brother notices this and brings his friend Ludwig over to join Antonio and I. As much as I fucking hate that potato bastard, I'm kind of glad that at least Feliciano's here to talk now. I don't quite like awkward silences.
"Ciao Lovi!~" Feliciano said happily while transferring everything over to the desk next to me. "Ciao, Feli."
"Mierda! " Antonio seethed. I looked over, and what do I see but a small bit of skin missing from Antonio's hand and a bloody carver. "How the fuck did you do that?!" I gasped, and rushed to get some paper towel. I got back, grabbed Antonio's hand, and began furiously wrapping it in a shit-ton of paper towel. "You need to be more careful, you'll get yourself killed, I swear."
Feliciano laughed a bit, "Wow, I didn't realize you cared about anyone other than family and cute gir-"
"Shut up!" I yelled at him, Antonio's hand still in my hand, and the paper towel in the other. I could feel the class's gaze and everything was silent. I felt like burning up, and I could feel my face turning red. I looked down at the desk and shoved the paper towel back on to the desk, then dropped (Careully set down) Antonio's hand.
Our group went back to silent, pardon for a few exchanges between Feli and Ludwig, and the room went back to normal, although I heard my name tossed around a few times. I plunged my carving tool down into the rubber and just scraped at it until period ended.
Briingg
Finally. I hurry to put my things away, grab my things and leave. I practically broke my lock trying to open it, shoved it between my teeth, and threw my things on the top shelf. I slammed the door and ran outside.
My group and I have a corner we always go to. Gilbert, Francis and Arthur are already there, and I run over as quick as possible. "Bonjour, Lovino." Francis said with a pleasant smile. I open my mouth to say something, but choose not to. I try to make sure my back is to the field, although I can already sense Antonio coming over.
"Antonio, what did you do this time? the Frenchman called. Antonio made the "what'd you say?" motion, and ran over. "Sorry, what'd you say?" Antonio said. "What did you do to your hand?" Gilbert repeated for Francis. "Oh, this?" He held up the hand with paper towel around it. "I just nicked my hand with the carver."
"Why so much paper towel?" Gilbert questioned. "Lovi..no did it."
I put my head down. I honestly don't want recognition right now, however my wishes aren't granted. Although I must praise him for correcting himself. "I was just trying to help... bastard."
"I know Lovino." Antonio said quietly, and I swear I could hear a hint of... sadness? Recalling? I'm not quite sure.
I still don't face him, and despite the small amount of snow on the ground, I sit down. Arthur sits next to me, followed my Gilbert, then Francis and Antonio until we're all sitting in a circle. It's all rather silent, until Francis speaks, which seems to surprise everyone a little. "What's going on between you two?" Everyone turns to look at him with a questioning stare. "I mean Antonio and Lovino." We look at each other, and then back to France. I can see Antonio open his mouth at the corner of my eye, so I cut him off just for safe measures. "Nothing. Nothing at all, Francis." I say loudly. I feel Antonio's gaze burning into the side of my head, but I try to ignore it. " I see." Francis replies.
The rest of the school day was more less just a blur. I don't remember it.
"Feli, hurry up, I want to get home." I called over to Feli from the front of the school. "Hold on a second, fratello!" He puts his phone back up to his ear. "Grazie!" and he hangs up. He bounded over to me, followed by Ludwig. "Ludwig's coming home with us today, okay?" he said happily. "Tch, fine."
Knowing I'm probably not going to be needed for conversations, I put my earbuds in.
I broke my only pair of headphones, so all I had left was earbuds. And then I broke one of the earbuds, so there's only one working left.
I put the working earbud in, and wrap the broken one around the back of my neck, and we all start walking home. I was right about not being needed in the conversation today, so I walk ahead a bit, in front of Feli and the potato bastard. Our house is around 20 minutes away when we walk, so it's not too far.
I started to just tune everything out and focus on my music after we crossed the major roads.
"...Lovi?"
"Hm? Yeah?" I turn around and start walking backwards, to face them. "Who?" Feli asked. "Wait, what?" I answered. I didn't hear his first question. "Do you have anyone you like?"
" I have a girlfriend, Feli." I almost choked out. "Oh yeah. Sorry," He went back to talking with Ludwig.
You know, now that I think about it, our school has so many different nationalities. Feli and I are Italian, Francis is French, Gilbert is German, however he claims to be 'Prussian', Arthur's British, Ludwig's German, and Kiku (one of Feli's other friends), is Japanese. There's even an entire group of Scandinavians, one from each of the Scandinavian, or 'Nordic' countries. Our school is interesting.
Pressing the buttons for the key pad on our door, I unlock it, throw it open, and head upstairs to my room. I put my bag down on the floor and lie down on my bed. Feli and the potato bastard are in the next room over, Feli's room. Anytime someone's over, my door always needs to be closed. Let's say my room isn't to neat. As for Feli's, I swear it's spotless.
I just lay there for a while, listening to music and staring at the ceiling. Eventually I just get bored and go over to my other brother, Marcello, who's in his room, probably drawing. Yeah, both my brothers can draw, however the artistic abilities seemed to have skipped over me.
Anyways, I push open my Marcello's door and walk in. He's younger than me by two years, so he's in grade five. We don't go to the same school. However I suspected correct and he was just drawing on the floor. "Hey Lovino. " his voice was calm. "What's going on?"
"I don't know, I'm bored."
"Want to draw with me?"
"I can't draw."
" I can teach you."
"Well it's better than nothing." I go over and sit next to him, and he gives me a piece of paper and a pencil.
"What do you want to draw?" Marcello asked me. I thought a bit, and decided to go with something simple. "Show me how to draw a tomato." Marcello nodded. "No problem."
Time went by and Marcello showed me how to draw a tomato. I stared at my finished drawing. "Are you fucking kidding me..." I murmured under my breath. "How am I this fucking bad?" I sigh and fold the paper up. I nod to Marcello, "Thanks Fratellino." I stand up to go back to my room and put this shitty drawing away. "Anytime Lovino."
As I was closing the door, my phone began to vibrate in my pocket. I whipped it out while closing the door, seeing as it was probably Antonio.
It was.
I didn't have anything to do, so as much as I might not have wanted to, I picked up. "Ciao.." I hissed in a somewhat monochrome tone.
"Hola Lovino."
"What's going on?"
" I just wanted to talk."
"About what, you damn Spaniard."
"... Yesterday."
"...Of course."
"Listen... I just, I just wanted to know if you meant it."
"What do you mean by that? I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."
"...Thanks."
There was a long pause.
"L-listen. I-if I were t-"
"Leave me alone, João! Sorry, what were you saying?"
"Nevermind, bastard! I-it's not important!"
"Lovino! Please tell me!"
"No! It's not important!"
I could honestly feel my face burning at the thought of what could've happened if had finished asking.
"Lovi!"
"My name is Lovino!"
"Lovino!"
"... No, it wouldn't be right anyways. I have a girlfriend anyways."
Wow. I said that really quiet for me.
"Lovino..."
"I... I just wanted to know if- if...after I... broke up- of course... i-if I-'d a-asked- just, what would you say?"
Barely a whisper.
" Of course!"
"You sure?"
"I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."
"Thanks. Bye, Toni, I have things to do."
And I hung up. Damn. Using my own words, I'm almost impressed.
I realized it seemed eerily quiet. I sat up on my bed, looking around, and then I heard laughing. To be honest, I tensed up and blushed heavily. "You got me, Ludwig!"
Oh. They were playing chess again (They did frequently). I sighed, relieved and my normal skin tone returning.
"Ludwig, You're father's here!" My mother, Rosetta, called from downstairs. "Ja," Ludwig called back. I hear him grab his bags then head downstairs. Good. I don't like that guy. He did something to my fratellino's head.
I laid back down and closed my eyes.