I wrote this for someone on deviantART, but decided to post it here as well...
It was inspired by a conversation with someone on dA... yeah.
Pairings: (sort of) LegaultHeath, (suggested) MatthewGuy and ErkSerra.
Fire Emblem (c) Nintendo/Intelligent Systems
Alihi (c) Me
"It's common knowledge now that our tactician, Alihi, knows all. But did you ever wonder how?" Heath rolled his eyes at Legault.
"No. Now take off that professor outfit, Legault. It looks ridiculous." Legault sighed and tore the outfit he had off, revealing his normal attire. He ran a hand through his hair.
"But Heath, it's just not right! She knows things that anyone normal shouldn't know!" Heath raised his eyebrow.
"Then again, when can we ever say Alihi is even remotely normal?"
"I heard that, Heath!" The wyvern rider and the thief jumped at the sound of the tactician's voice. After a long silence, Legault spoke.
"… You see what I mean?!"
"That could have been just a coincidence. She could have just walked by right when I said it…" Legault grabbed Heath's hand and dragged him away towards the tactician's tent. "What are you doing?!"
"We're going to get to the bottom of this."
--
"Ah, Heath, Legault, how nice to see you!" The said men's eyes widened. Alihi gave them a puzzled look. "What's wrong?"
"H-how did you know we were coming?" Alihi sighed.
"First of all, poor Heath didn't have a choice; you dragged him here with you because you were worried about what I do. Second, Alihi knows all."
"But how, Alihi, how?!" Alihi grinned mischievously.
"I guess I can tell you… if I can do something." Heath stared at Alihi, then Legault, then back at Alihi.
"… What kind of something?"
"It won't be that bad, Heath. I won't kill you or anything like that." Legault stared at the tactician as well.
"I might regret saying this, but alright." Alihi grinned and walked towards the back of her tent.
"You won't regret it, trust me…" The tactician mumbled to herself as she searched through her pile of papers. "Where is it…?" The wyvern rider and the thief peered over her shoulders. "… Ah-ha! Here it is!" She turned around; in her arms was a thin book. Alihi showed the two the cover, which read, "Fire Emblem".
"… What is that?"
"It's called a strategy guide, Heath. It's hard to explain it, but it helps with a lot of my duties." She quickly flipped through it, and then tossed it back onto the pile of papers. "Any other questions?"
"I've got one."
"Yes, Legault?"
"How do you know who likes who? Like with Serra and Erk, and Matthew and Guy?" Another smile crossed Alihi's face.
"Oh, that? That has to do with the rest of my papers…"
"Can Heath and I see them?" Alihi chuckled.
"Only if you want to be mentally scarred." Heath took a small step back, tugging lightly on Legault's cape.
The thief understood the wyvern rider's message; "Let's get out of here NOW."
"We'll pass… Thank you, Alihi!" The two hurried out of the tent. The tactician waved at the two until they were out of sight, and then turned to the stack of papers. She picked up her pen and one of the sheets of paper, and started to write.
"As soon as the two returned to the tent, Legault pounced on Heath, kissing him hard."
She grinned naughtily.
"Oh, I LOVE being the tactician!"