She slowly closed the door of Mr. Carson's pantry, what made him look at her and smile as he stood up from his chair. Mrs. Hughes showed him a letter and smiled with tears in her eyes.
-Did you read it?
-No. I wanted to read it with you.
He slowly took it from her hand, opened it and read it quickly. When he finished he looked at her with a small smile on his lips.
-My mother says that she has started school, and she has a few friends already. She hopes to see us by Christmas.
-Maybe we could take some time off before Christmas, take a train and see them.
-Like we do always?
-Yes. She would be happy to see us, no?
-My mother or Jane?
-Both. But I think Jane would be happier.
-Do you know what she wants for her birthday?
-I saw a doll in a shop, and she's always telling us how much she would like to have a doll.
-How much?
-50 £.
-Well, is more than what I had in mind.
-But think of how happy the doll will make her.
-Alright. You go this evening and buy it.
She nodded, approached him and looked at the letter. She took it from his hand and read it herself. At the end of it a small hand had sign it with the name Jane. She looked at Charles and then back to the letter.
-You miss her no?
-How not to miss her. She's our little one.
-I know, and I wish she could be here with us, but remember that no one knows about us or her, and it must remain like that for as long as we can hide it.
-Sometimes I really wonder how we both agreed to do something like this.
-Because you were young, and I didn't want to fail my father.
-But it's not a sin. We did it because our families arranged it, and I don't think we should be ashamed of it. Why hide it?
-I'm not ashamed, but I don't want you to be out in the street if they find out about Jane, or about us. God knows we need the money for her, and for your sister. It must remain like this Elsie, and I know that you don't like it, but it must be this way.
-I know. Stupid rules.
-Elsie!
-It's true.
-I know, but we must be careful. There was just one time we weren't careful and now we have Jane.
-I hope you don't regret it.
-Of course I don't. But we must be careful.
-Alright.
She kissed him on the cheek, and smiled.
-You still have it Charles?
He nodded and walked to his desk. He took a small picture from one of the drawers, walked back to where she was standing and showed it to her.
-Isn't she beautiful?
In the picture there was a small girl, laughing, with a pair of beautiful blue eyes, pretty auburn curls, rosy cheeks and with a snub nose, in Elsie's arms, who was smiling at her.
-I'm sure that when she grows up she will look like you.
-She will be like you Charles. She has always been very loyal.
A tear escaped from Elsie's eyes, which Charles saw and wiped away with his thumb.
-We won't be able to see her for her birthday, will we?
-I don't think so. But we can give the doll to my mother and she can give it to her in her birthday.
-It won't be the same. But well, we can't help it can we?
-That's the price we must pay.
More tears fell from her eyes, and she turned away from him so he wouldn't see them. She was a proud woman.
-Elsie, I know how you feel. And there's no need to hide the tears from me. After all I'm your husband, no?
She turned and hid on his chest, crying.
-I'm sorry, but I'm her mother and I'm not with her. And it hurts.
-I know, and I'm here.
He kissed her hair, and held her until he felt she had stopped crying. He placed a finger under her chin and made her look at him.
-Don't cry, you are too beautiful to cry.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door, they quickly run to opposite sides from the room and made it look as if they were busy. Mrs. Patmore entered the room.
-Mr. Carson his Lordship is in the kitchen. He wants to talk to you.
-Of course. If you'll excuse me Mrs. Hughes.
He left the room, followed by Mrs. Patmore, leaving the poor Mrs. Hughes alone with the picture still in her hands. She looked down at it and after a few seconds she left it in the drawer, left the room, closing the door, and run upstairs.
She stumble into Anna in the stairs, and looked at the ring in her hand. Her wedding ring. She smiled at her and hurried upstairs faster. Not very sure how she found herself in front of the door of her room. She opened it and walked to her closet, threw everything out of the drawers, and as soon as she found the little box she sat on the bed with it in her hands.
-Forgive me Charles, but God knows that it's killing me.-She opened it and found a beautiful golden ring. She took it out and placed it in her third finger, admiring it.-After all, I'm a mother and a wife, not just a housekeeper. And I'm sorry I haven't done it before. Really sorry.
She walked back downstairs, and saw that there was no one. She thought that maybe they had gone upstairs. She was walking to the kitchen when suddenly there was a knock on the door. She looked around and walked to open it to find a woman with a little girl in her arms, and a few suitcases on the floor next to them.
Mrs. Hughes's breath caught in her throat, and thought that maybe she had fallen asleep in her sitting room and was dreaming.
-Mum!-The little girl jumped from the woman's arms and run to Mrs. Hughes, hugging her legs.
She looked down at the little girl and then back to the woman. She kneeled and took the little girl in her arms, hugging her close to her chest.
-Mummy, I can't breathe.
-Sorry sweetheart. What are you doing here?- She looked at the woman, whose eyes were full of tears.
-You better tell Charles to come here.