Clare braced herself for the conversation she needed to have with Drew. She texted him that she needed to talk. With Eli back in town, she began to realize just how much she might be losing if she decided that she would be with Drew.
Nearing the door, her stomach got queasy Clare was sure that it was just stress. Stress put on her by Drew. That's it; she needed to end this now.
She walked up to the Dot and saw Drew sitting there at the table. Sure, he looked handsome sitting there, but she had to ignore that.
She walked up and sat on the chair opposite his without saying a word.
"Hey Clare, I got your text. You said you wanted to talk?" Drew asked. He reached over to begin rubbing her hand, but Clare pulled back.
"We need to talk…" Clare said. She gathered her thoughts before continuing.
"I don't think we should hang out with each other anymore," she said bluntly.
Drew sat back in his seat. He was tired too. He was tired of the games Clare kept playing with him. One moment they were having fun, the next she was telling him to back off.
"Why?" he asked.
"I have a boyfriend!" Clare said.
"Yeah, so? That doesn't change how you feel about me, and it doesn't change how I feel about you!" Drew said.
Clare sighed.
"Well it should. No matter how I feel about you, I love Eli. Nothing will ever change that, and if I throw it away because of some high school crush, I won't forgive myself. I want to be with Eli, not you," Clare said harshly.
Drew felt stabbed with her words. 'I want to be with Eli, not you.' 'I won't forgive myself'.
"Did you ever even care about me?" Drew asked.
Clare looked off before speaking.
"Not like that. Not like I care about Eli," she said.
Drew tried to swallow his tears. When that didn't work, he walked away.
Clare gave sad but relieved sigh. She finally had gotten it off her chest. Now she could focus on her senior year so that she could hopefully be with Eli.
As she got up to leave, Clare's eyes widened with shock; standing behind was Eli, with tears streaming down his face. He wiped his cheeks once before running home.
Clare fell back into her seat. How could she have possible been so stupid? All this was her fault. Now she was the unfaithful one. She needed to fix it now.
Half an hour later, Eli sat on his bed, flipping through comic books. Adam was dead, Clare loved someone else, now what? Will his parents get divorced? Will someone plant drugs in his backpack and get him kicked out of NYU? What's next?
As he wallowed in self-pity, he heard a soft, long knock on his door.
"Yeah, come in," he said, expecting his mother or father. He didn't take his eyes off his comic book.
Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw a pink mob come into his room, and looked up, his eye's focusing on Clare.
Eli's blood boiled.
"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be off… making out with Drew or something?" he asked, going back to his comic book, ignoring Clare.
"Eli, I need to explain what happened," she said.
"Don't bother," he said.
Clare ignored him and sat next to him on his bed. He tried to lay her hand on his leg, but he moved away from her, making Clare's heart break all the more.
"When I found out you cheated on me, I was really, really sad. When I went to the Thanksgiving Feast, Drew was there and he had just broken up with Bianca. We both felt so sad… we kissed. It only lasted for a couple seconds. After we made up, I tried my hardest to forget that it ever happened, but everywhere I turned, he was there. I'm his VP, we have the same classes, we have the same friends… it was almost like having you here. You used to always be here and… now you're not, and I just miss you," Clare explained.
"So you went and, what, slept with him?" Eli asked.
"No, no," Clare assured him.
"We only kissed once. It was just a onetime thing. I would never do that to you," she said.
"So then what's going on with you guys?" Eli asked.
"We've just been hanging out, the same that friends do, but we have feeling for each other." It was extremely hard for Clare to get her words out.
"I am so sorry," Clare said.
She watched as Eli shook his head with tears in his eyes.
"You just admitted to me that you have feelings for another person," he said.
Clare sighed.
"Come on Eli, you have to admit, haven't you ever had thoughts about someone else?" Clare asked.
"Of course, but I would never act on it!" Eli said.
"And neither would I!" Clare said.
"You know, me hanging with Drew is a lot less bad than you making out with Lenore," Clare pointed out.
"But it's different," Eli said.
"You actually have feelings for Drew. I never had feeling for Lenore," he said.
Clare felt in her heart and knew in her head that he was right.
"Eli, I don't want to be with him. I want to be with you. I love you. I don't love Drew," Clare said.
"How am I supposed to just get over the fact that you like someone else?" Eli asked.
"I'll do whatever it takes Eli. Whatever it takes to make you believe that I don't want to be with him. I just want to be with you," Clare said.
Eli thought of all the things Clare could do that would make him feel better, and a few ideas popped into his head.
"I don't want you with him. I don't want you talking with him unless you need too. I want him out of your life," Eli said.
Clare wasn't exactly sure what he meant by that vague statement, but she would do whatever it took to make it happen.
"Fine, but can I ask something of you?" Clare asked.
"What can you ask of me?" Eli asked.
Clare sighed, again.
"That you'll do the same with Lenore," she said.
"Clare, Lenore and I are just friends!" he said.
"So are me and Drew, but you want me to completely distance myself from him. You actually made out with Lenore. We've both been unfaithful, you physically and I emotionally, so why am I the one who has to make changes?" Clare asked.
Eli tried to see things from Clare's side and decided that perhaps she was right. Perhaps he was asking a lot of her, especially since she didn't ask anything from him.
"Fine. I'll distance myself from Lenore if you distance yourself from Drew," he said.
"Done," Clare said.
She scooted closer to Eli and put her hand on his shoulder.
"Now, can't we just go back to being happy and normal?" she asked.
Eli was still hurt, but he nodded his head. He figured it would be best and easiest to just let it go.
"Good," she said.
She wrapped her arms around her boyfriend and placed her forehead against his.
"I've missed you," she said.
Eli looked into his beautiful girlfriend's silver-blue eyes and smiled.
"I missed you too," he said, placing a hand on his girlfriend's waist.
"You know what I want to do?" Clare asked.
Eli shook his head.
Clare leaned in, kissing her sexy boyfriend passionately. She ran her cold hands against his warm abs, as he rubbed his hand on her side.
They fell back into his bed, ready to spend a night of passion together, which at this point, was much needed.