A/N: normal font is buffy and italics are spike. Just about buffy's feelings about being chosen to be a slayer and spike's feelings about being chosen (by drusilla) to be a vampire, and the choices they make.

CHOSEN

I didn't ask for this

I didn't get to choose.

I was chosen

I was chosen

Chosen to hunt

To hunt,

Chosen to fight

To fight,

Chosen to slay

To kill,

I didn't choose to be a champion

to be a murderer.

I never wanted to fight anything

I never wanted to hurt anyone.

But they didn't ask me what I wanted

She didn't tell me what I would become.

They just chose me

She just chose me.

They ripped years from my life

She told me that our years didn't have to be numbered,

Because even if I'm stronger than the ones before me

And that if I was strong

I won't live

I didn't have to die.

One mistake

No mistakes

and I would die

and I would live forever.

and when I think

and when I would think

Of all the things I'll never get to do

Of all the people who never stood a chance,

Of all the days I'll never get to live

Of all the lives snuffed out by my hands,

I don't feel strong

I would feel strong.

I feel small

I'd feel omnipotent,

not super-human

Invincible.

Just human

Like a god:

mortal

Immortal.

I'm terrified

I didn't choose to love her

But here I am

Yet here I am

And I will not back down

And I'm terrified

Losing is not an option

Giving in is not an option

I may not have chosen this

I may not have chosen to become evil

But I choose not to run away

But now I choose to be good

For them

For her

I choose to feel fear

Once again I feel fear

And to stand my ground

But I cannot back down

I will fight demons

I will fight the demon inside me

And I will win

And win

I have to

I have to win

I was chosen