Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.

Chapter 1

Disappearing

I never knew how horrible my life was until this very moment. I was lying on my living floor with blood pouring out of my nose as my boyfriend stood over me. He had hit me and this wasn't the first time it had happened.

"I'm so sorry, Kristen. Are you ok?"

But he wasn't sorry. He said this every time he hit me and yet it always happened again.

"It won't happened again, I promise"

Liar. It will happen again, it always does.

"I'm fine. My nose is bleeding, but I don't think it's broken."

I picked myself up and went to the bathroom to try to stop the bleeding. He had never made me bleed before. I probably should leave him. I probably should have left a long time ago, but I couldn't. I love him.

I had been with Shane for 3 years, going to be 4 in June. He didn't start hitting me till after our 3rd year anniversary when we moved in together. My family didn't approve of our moving in together. That didn't stop them from adoring Shane though.

I met Shane through my father, Howard. My father and his father, Mitch, worked together in the business industry. Actually Mitch worked for my father. Howard is the Chairmen of the board and Mitch is vice president. That being said, we both came from very wealthy families. It was my mother, Emily, who came up with the idea that me and Shane should date. I was 18 at the time and he was 22. He was in college, majoring in business to follow in his dad's footsteps. Emily and Shane's mother, Debbie, were close friends. Debbie was always telling mother how smart he was and how well he was doing in college, but she wished he could find a nice girl to settle down with. Of course my mother brought up that I was single to. She was always trying to set me up with someone. She wanted me to marry someone from our social class.

I knew Debbie pretty well. She was always over at the house planning some sort of event with mother. They both belonged to the ritzy clubs that most of the rich women belong to. They did benefits and luncheons all the time. I was also best friends with Debbie's daughter Miranda. I had never met Shane though. He was 4 years older than me and Miranda. By the time we became best friends he had already went off the college.

Debbie was all for the idea of setting me up with Shane. She thought I was beautiful. Most people did. My chestnut brown hair is long and silky. My eyes change between green and blue. I'm pretty short, 5'3". I work out, so my body is amazing.

I agreed to the set up and my mother was ecstatic. Shane couldn't look that bad. Miranda is gorgeous with her dark hair and light blue eyes. Mother and Debbie had it set that next time Shane came home we would go out. He was coming that weekend.

He showed up right on time and when I answered the door I couldn't believe how stunning he was. He was quite tall, 6'2. He has Miranda's dark hair and light blue eyes. Though he was covered up I could still tell he had a muscular body and also a tan complexion like me. From the moment our eyes met I knew he would be the guy I would marry and we would have a beautiful life.

Boy was I ever wrong!

I had got my nose to stop bleeding when Shane walked in.

"Are you sure you're ok?"

"Yeah, it's stopped bleeding."

He looked down at the floor and back up at me.

"I love you, Kristen. I really do."

"I know."

But I really didn't know anymore. How can you hit someone you love?

"Please don't tell anyone about this."

"I won't. I never do."

And why would I? It's embarrassing.

"I don't mean to hit you, Kristen. It's just…sometimes you make me so mad."

I looked up at him

"I make you mad?! I didn't do anything!"

"You dress so….provocatively and guys stare at you! That guy was flirting with you tonight and you were flirting back right in front of my face!"

"I was not flirting!! He was our waiter for crying out loud and he was just making small talk! And now you're telling me how to dress? Well I'm not getting into this fight again. I'm tired, so I'm going to bed."

I pushed him out of the door way and went into our bedroom and slammed the door. I could feel the tears starting to well up. I wasn't going to do this anymore. I had had enough tears; I needed to get out of this relationship. I put on my pajamas and got into the bed. I knew I would be sleeping alone tonight. Every time we fight, he sleeps in the guest bedroom.

When I woke up the next morning Shane had already left for work. I found a note he left saying that he was going to be working late. This was my chance to pack up and leave. I wouldn't be able to leave while he was here. He wouldn't let me and I'm sure things would get physical. They always do when he gets angry. A part of me wants to stay because I love him. But I think about how scary he gets when he's angry, how scared I get. I shouldn't be scared of the one I love.

I know exactly where I'm going to go. I'm a petite model and my agent has got me jobs in Japan. But she told me I would have to move there for a couple months. It would be easier than flying back and forth. I had told her I couldn't because of Shane. She told me that I have a couple weeks to decide. I never told Shane about it. He hated me being a model. He didn't like other guys staring at me.

I picked my cell and dialed my agent's number.

"Hey Jordan, its Kristen, I decided that I do want the job in Japan."

"Awesome! I will call them and let them know your coming. How soon can u leave?"

"Today, I just got to pack my clothes and stuff and I will be ready."

"Ok! I had reserved you loft, so I will call them."

"Thanks Jordan I will talk to you later."

I hung up the phone and went to get my suitcases.

I wasn't going to leave a note or anything for Shane. I was just going to disappear. He wouldn't be able to find me. He didn't know Jordan's number. He didn't even know the name of my agency. He kept out of my modeling career. I guess it's because he despised it so much.

I wasn't going to tell my family or friends either. I love them, but I need to be by myself for a while. I need to start over. Of course I will contact them again, just not right away. My life feels like such a mess right now that I just need to start over. Japan will be my fresh start.

I think I should maybe write a letter to my family and Miranda letting them know that I'm ok. I don't want them to worry about me.

Dear Miranda,

I am leaving Shane and this city. Please don't be mad, you don't have the slightest idea of what has been going on. Please don't worry either; I'm going to be ok. I need to get away from all this. I need to be by myself. If you call I won't answer. It's nothing you did; you're my best friend and always will be. I will contact you, I promise. It might be a while though. I have to go now. I love you!

Kristen

I will mail this to her and she will receive it tomorrow. She knows me and how I am, she'll be ok. But I'm not sure about my parents.

I wrote my parent's note and sealed the envelope. I put their letter and Miranda's in my purse. I got my suit cases and started to load my car. It took a few trips as I was trying to take as much as I could with me.

On the last trip I just stood and looked at our apartment. I had lived here for a year. I loved this apartment, but I had to go. There was nothing here for me anymore, Shane had ruined that. I locked the door for the last time and left. I dropped my letters off at the post office before heading to the airport. Jordan had reserved me a ticket and it was at the desk.

I got on the plane and went to take my seat in first class. I looked out the window knowing this would be my last time here, last time for a while at least. I didn't know if I would ever come back to stay, but I knew I would have to come back eventually for my family and Miranda's sake. What I did know was I wouldn't be with Shane again, never again. He wouldn't hit me again; I would be safe in Japan.

I brought my pillow in my carry on. I was flying from Beverly Hills to Japan, a 12 hour flight. I would be sleeping most of the way. I'm not too big on flying. It's ok, but it's not my favorite thing.

I feel asleep shortly after the plane took off. I tried to think about my life in Japan. What would it be like? Will I find someone to make me happy? Will my career finally take off? So many questions I had. They would soon be answered.

I'm walking down the street in Japan and I see this little girl running down the street crying. I stop her.

"Are you ok little girl?"

"You ...can…see...me?"

"Of course I can."

The little girl turns to me and she has a chain hanging from her chest. I gasp. The girl keeps crying.

"Are you lost?"

"Yes and there's a monster chasing me. Please help me, I'm so scared!"

All of a sudden I hear these loud thuds coming from behind me. They stop and I hear a roar.

I slowly turn around and there is this huge thing standing there. It has a white face, maybe it's a mask or something and a hole in its chest.

"Wh...What…is...Th...That?" I manage to get out.

It roars again and then lunges at us with its mouth open.

"AHHHHHH!"

I jump up and notice that everyone is looking at me. I'm still on the plane.

"Are you ok miss" an elderly man asks me.

"Umm, yea, I'm fine. Sorry."

I set back in my seat. I must have been dreaming. That was a weird dream. What was that thing? Why did that little girl have a chain on her chest?

Just then the intercom came on. "Ladies and gentlemen please fasten your seatbelts. We will be arriving in Tokyo momentarily. Thank you for flying Delta airlines."

My new life was about to start. I was excited, but still I couldn't stop thinking about that weird dream.

The next couple weeks were crazy. I was trying to get settled and get worked started up. I had a lot of photo shoots and commercials lined up. I was happy about that. I really loved to model. Fashion was a big passion on mine. Runway was my favorite part, though I didn't get to walk in many shows because I was petite. Most designers liked the extremely tall girls.

My cell had been ringing off the hook. Shane had called me like a million times and left almost as many voicemails. The voicemails changed as time went on. Around the time he got home from work the day I left he said, "Hey, I just came in and you're not home which is odd. When are you gonna be home? I love you." After a few hours went by he said "Hey, it's me and you're still not home. Are you ok? I'm getting worried. I love you." Really late that night he said "It's me again. I went to sleep hoping that when I woke up you would be here. Where are you at? You haven't answered any of my calls all day. I was thinking that maybe you went somewhere where you didn't have signal. But it's really late and I'm getting worried. I love you." The morning after he said "Maybe you're mad at me about the fight we had. We never resolved it. Maybe you stayed at a hotel or your parents last night to cool off. I am sorry Kristen. Please come home. I love you." Around lunch time he said "Miranda called me and said she got a letter from you that said you had left me! What the hell is your problem? You tell my sister you're leaving me but you don't tell me! Do you know how worried I was about you? I thought something bad had happened. I was gona report you missing if you weren't home this afternoon! You're such a selfish bitch! You could have at least told me! Well I'm glad your gone if your gona act like this! You need to come get the rest of your shit out of my apartment!"

He called several times more, and the voicemails just got worse. He called me so many names. He thought I was cheating on him and left him for some other man. He accused me of everything, but that still didn't make me answer the phone. I didn't want to talk to him; I just wanted to move on with my life.