The insane musings of the authoress: It seems to me I am writing this fic for five reasons. They are the following:
1) I do not like the newfangled series. I get lost in all the new names. Watch me write good, old-fashioned 01!
2) Jou and Mimi? Need more love.
3) I am fascinated by the idea of love letters.
4) It's about goddamn time I got into the Digimon fandom.
5) Jou and Mimi? Need more love.
Seriously, though, I hope everyone enjoys this fic. I'm new to the fandom, but not the show, if you know what I mean. It should hopefully be a short(-ish) project, about ten chapters, I'm hoping.
Disclaimer: I absolutely do not, in any way, claim any ownership whatsoever of Digimon.
For Sylphie, Lily and all the Joumi fans lurking out there.
Love Letters
Chapter One
A Riot of Pink
She can't really see anymore – tears are blurring her vision; and Hikari is melting into Takeru is melting into Taichi is melting into Jou.
"You – you didn't have to do this," she says, choking on the words.
"But Mimi-chan, we wanted to," Hikari assures her, all sweetness and light and fourteen years old.
The scent of the bouquet of flowers that she's clutching onto for dear life is thickening around her head, creating a kind of blanket. (Tai shoved them awkwardly into her arms when they all first caught up to her at the airport, with a muttered, "if you don't like them, don't blame me – Sora picked them."
"I love them," she had said, and it was heartfelt – they were beautiful, a riot of tiger lilies and Sakuras, pinks and plum blossoms and several other flowers she couldn't even name.)
This airport scene is a little surreal, she thinks; it happens in movies, especially the kind she likes to watch; but not to ordinary people. And yet here she is – having her very own little airport scene. It's because they're not ordinary people she thinks to herself, they're anything but ordinary.
They're all there, ranged around her – Taichi and Yamato, Sora, Takeru and Hikari, Jou and Koushiro – and she's less afraid to be leaving, somehow; because of this definite show of support.
(When she had asked them, a little earlier, why they didn't tell her they were going to do this, they replied that they had wanted it to be a surprise, so they arranged it in secret. She's sort of glad they didn't warn her, for some reason. It's better this way; because she hasn't had time to get emotional and prepare big long heartfelt speeches that never come out right anyway.)
The hustle and bustle of the airport fades into insignificance all around them and it's like the only people there are the eight of them. She's hugging them all in turn for what might be the millionth time since they caught her in the departures lounge.
"Thank you all so much for coming," she says as her arms close around Taichi, and she wants to yell it and smile despite the tears gathering in soft brown eyes, but it comes out like a whisper.
"Hey, hey there, princess," Tai says comfortingly, addressing her fondly with the nickname he coined as he pats her reassuringly on the back. He's surprisingly good with girls, even emotional ones. His boyfriend, on the other hand, is not. Yamato has looked slightly terrified ever since Mimi has begun getting emotional.
"You didn't think we'd let you leave without saying a proper goodbye, now, did you?" he asks as she pulls away from him just a little to look up at him with wide, wet brown eyes.
"Well, I thought – we had the party, after all, last night – " she began. Tai tutted.
"Now now, princess, you didn't seriously think we'd leave you to do this big scary airport thing all alone?" he says, and she realises he's right. She wouldn't expect it of them.
"Oh, Tai!" she says, and buries her head back in the comforting softness of his T-shirt, and he just holds her softly there.
When she emerges, she gazes around at everyone with those eyes and says, "I really don't think that this is a good idea, and I swore I wouldn't, at ANY point, make a speech, but I think I'm going to have a go."
She clears her throat desperately and wipes her eyes fiercely, taking a deep breath as she prepares to begin.
"We have –" she consults her watch, "five minutes (and her voice cracks on the words with the realisation) until I have to board. I just wanted to say thank you all so much for coming. We've been through so much and you all mean so much to me and –"
A sob wrenches her body and she is cut off for a second as she regains her breath, "we've fought monsters together, terrible evil that most people couldn't even dream of and we've won. I think it's created an unbreakable bond between us and –"
She chokes on the words and feels annoyed at herself. She can do this! She can!
"I consider you friends, but I also consider you family," she chokes out as she begins to cry desperately and realises that there's nothing that can be done about it, "you guys are the brothers and sisters I never had. I'm a better person today because of all of you. You better all stay in touch, because I can't imagine my life without you!" she jokes weakly, and they laugh amid the sadness.
"Thank you all so much, for everything. For all you've done. For putting up with me for six whole years. For – for being the most wonderful friends anyone could ever have. Iloveyouallsomuch!" she finished on a wail as she began to cry even harder.
"That was a beautiful speech," she vaguely hears a voice compliment her. She blinks her eyes rapidly to try to see past the tears as she feels a handkerchief be pressed gently into her hands.
"Thank you," she says as she wipes her eyes and smiles weakly up at the person. Jou smiles a little uncertainly back down at her.
"Oh, Jou!" she says wetly and hurls herself at him. To his credit; he doesn't panic, but instead strokes her hair slightly awkwardly while murmuring something vague in a low voice that she supposes he thinks is comforting. It is, rather strangely, although it might just be the way he's speaking.
"Last call for flight number 302, non-stop to New York, USA. All passengers will now please board. I repeat; this is the last call for flight number 302, non-stop to New York, USA. Thank you."
Mimi looks up immediately at the sound of her voice; her head snaps around to the source of it and she pales. It sounds like a call to go to Death Row.
She looks around almost wildly at her friends and they smile back, encouragingly, comfortingly, but sad too. Jou's shirt is scrunched into her fists, she realises vaguely, and she's not sure how it happened. There's panic in her eyes; she can feel it, but she can't rid herself of it.
She catches sight of her parents just a little ahead; they're waving to her and the waves are treading that thin line between hurry up, we'll miss the flight if you don't get over here RIGHT NOW! And dear, we know this is hard for you, but we need you to come now. We're sorry, but we need you to come.
She looks at them, clutching the various documents they require for boarding and walking towards the departure gate and she knows she has only a few seconds. She can feel them passing extra-slowly, like time has been slowed, slowed and they're all under water. When she turns her head it takes an effort.
"I love you all," she repeats, and they echo her words we love you too, Mimi.
She takes one last glance at those she loves and has to leave behind and she begins to cry again, but she can't stop it and she doesn't want to stop it anyway. Jou's handkerchief is clutched in her fist, still, along with twin handfuls of his shirt. He smells like peppermint, and she tries to memorise it. She takes a deep breath and tries to memorise the way Hikari and Takeru stand shoulder-to-shoulder all the time without even realising it; the way his hand almost touches her shoulder, almost but never quite makes it.
She tries to forever engrave on her mind the image of Yamato and Taichi as they stand before her, fingers casually entangled, effortlessly and wonderfully in love. And Sora, Sora with her heart of gold - Mimi wants to take away the memory of her brilliant smile. And Izzy, standing there, already telling everyone that he'll search out the best prices for flights on the internet so they can all go visit as soon as possible – she wants to remember his kindness and patience in dealing with a ten-year-old little airhead of a spoiled brat who was as different to him as could be.
They are her friends, they complete her.
She looks up at Jou again, finally, with panic and desperation in her eyes and they cry please don't make me go, I can't leave you all, please don't make me go but he is the voice of reason, as always. He gently reaches down and takes his shirt back from her hands and there is absolutely no coldness or curtness in the action as he places one hand on each of her shoulders and turns her right around.
"They're waiting for you," he says, gently but firmly as he pushes her forward, just a little. "Go on. New York might be fun – an adventure. But you'll never know if you don't ever board the plane!"
She takes a few tentative steps forward and they call after her all the way, good luck, Mimi! and stay in touch, you hear! and we'll see you again soon, for definite, especially if Izzy goes on one of his infamous internet trawls!
She takes heart at this and squares her shoulders; her steps becoming more purposeful and she doesn't let herself look back, even once.
She meets her parents at the gate, and they share a little, tense smile before they cross the gate, walking past the beaming attendant (they are the last people to board). For Mimi, it feels as though she is walking into the unknown.
When she is settled into her seat, she looks at the bouquet lying on her lap and at Jou's handkerchief, still clutched in a tight fist. And she falls apart.
…
A.N. This is quite a short chapter, to open. It really should be labelled as a prologue, except having prologues annoys me – I always get mixed up as to what chapter I'm on, if you know what I mean. Because part two is chapter one, and, well…
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and that you'll come read the next chapter!
Shattered Midnight Dreams…zzz…