Disclaimer: I don't own the Slayers…;)
This is just a short little sad story about Lina and Gourry as the beginning of her quest of loneliness. Of course Xelloss will come to eventually comfort her, who else?
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Lina Inverse squinted into the sunset; her treasures that hung from the bag strapped to her back gleamed in the light of the fading sun. The bandits that she'd only just recently turned into ash were your local, stupid bandits. But stupid bandits find ways to get their hands on treasure no matter what.
The setting sun had always brought a sense of sadness to her, she'd never known why. Maybe it was because with each passing day she realized that it was another day that Gourry wasn't hers.
Gourry was one of the only people in this world Lina trusted, or loved. Yes, love. It was such a hurtful thing. She hated it.
Love hadn't ever gotten her where she wanted to be…in fact it was the only thing keeping her from moving on. She looked back at Gourry, who was gazing up at the sky in awe as he always did at the end of each day.
She sighed and turned her head away from him. Here with him was the only place she wanted to be, but at the same time it was killing her to stay.
He, of course, was oblivious to the reasons of her change in mood. "What's wrong Lina? Are you hungry?" She smiled sadly at him; it was all just so ironic.
He cared about her; he cared about her a lot. But it was the kind of care that you gave to a little sister or a pet; it was not the care of a lover, the care she longed to receive from him.
Gourry shrugged and dropped down onto the log opposite of Lina, and stared into the fire. She watched him closely, noting his every move, drinking in his very essence.
Lina could never admit to anyone but herself the way she felt about Gourry, for it would only be in vain to tell anyone of them. So she kept to her usual facades and pretended to not care whether or not he traveled with her.
She stood up and mumbled a goodnight to Gourry before walking towards her tent to lie down for the night, but Gourry's voice stopped her. "Lina, I love you." Her entire body froze to the core and she suddenly felt a small buzzing in her stomach. Lina started to turn to face him with a smile, but his voice sounded again before she could open her mouth.
"You are like a little sister to me, I love you alot." Lina didn't turn around, and she only nodded while biting her lip so hard that she drew blood. She kept walking to her tent and as soon as she was safely inside she fell to the ground in a silent mess of tears.
How could he do that to her? How could he mess with her feelings like that? Another silent sob shot through her and she whimpered. Gourry had never felt anything for her at all, had he?
OoO
Lina awoke slowly, blinking several times before her eyes focused and she rubbed her face. She knew that her eyes were probably still puffy from last night's fit of tears, but Gourry probably would just think she had a cold.
Before she could crawl out of the tent she noticed a note sitting next to her. When did that get there?
She sat up and rubbed her eyes before picking up the paper. Not bothering to open it she left the tent, deciding that if Gourry wanted to tell her something he could say it to her face.
But Gourry wasn't there. She looked around the camp they'd made the night before, but there were no signs of him anywhere. His bag and sword were not near the burnt out fire, nor was his tent still set next to hers.
Where had he gone without saying goodbye? Before running off down the road screaming after him, Lina realized that she was clenching something in her hand-the note.
Tentatively she held it up; eyeing it suspiciously…she was not looking forward to what lay inside.
The scribbled handwriting she immediately recognized as Gourry's proceeded as so:
Dear Lina,
Sorry to leave you all by yourself. I left some food next to the fire so you wouldn't be hungry when you woke up. I had to get back to Sylphiel as soon as possible, because we are to be married in two weeks. I'm sorry for not telling you Lina, but I forgot. You are invited to the wedding, so don't be mad at me, ok?
Gourry
Lina stared mutely at the little piece of paper, it felt like someone was twisting her heart so tightly that she lost her breath. A burst of anger shot through her and she threw down the small slip of paper, cursing Gourry with every swear she could think of. He'd done it again..hurt her without ever realising it.
The feelings that rushed through her were fighting over control and she lashed out at anything she could find, tearing everything up with her sword. Before she had realised it she had been shouting Gourry's name the entire time in a blind tyrade. This was so painful.
She wiped away at the tears that were now pouring down her face. This was not like her at all. It's not like this wasn't expected; Gourry had probably been planning to marry Sylphiel for a long time now.
The thought didn't help as she still felt her knees buckle and she collapsed to the dirt floor. Pain tore through her shattered heart, and the sobs that racked her small body could be heard through out the small clearing.
Crying had never been a habit for Lina, she almost never cried. That was weakness, and she didn't accept any weakness. That façade wore down as soon as she'd allowed herself to fall in love with Gourry. Love, she decided, was a weakness.
OoO
After crying for what seemed like an eternity Lina regained her composure and packed her belongings. It was very hard for her to pack all her things considering almost everything held a memory of Gourry.
She sniffled a little as she stood with her accessories now in tact, and moved onward. Her pride was bruised but now at least she could say that she knew the definition of love-
When you could hardly breathe without feeling that person like a dagger, sink themselves deeper into your heart.
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Author's Note: I didn't like this one too much, but at the time it seemed like a good idea to have Gourry leave without saying goodbye…I thought it would make it a bit drearier. Expect the next story to have a lighter tone to it and a happy, lemony ending;D