Endless, endless. The sky just crashing down on the ol' farmhouse. I looked out at the heavy rain which showed no signs of letting up and thought of all the other ponies who may just be sharing the same experience. Ponyville, after all, was the active sort of town. You ground a bunch of outdoors-y- types due to weather and they will all be breaking the same ol' routine. Too listless to curl up with a nice book, the solitude was concerning and comfortable at the same time, somehow.

The pegasus ponies really outdid themselves this time. Oh we were scheduled for a rain all right, but this... Today was really the first day when I felt that summer was truly over. It's already the first of October, but Ponyville tends to stay warmer for a bit longer. The leaves aren't even due to change for a few more weeks, I'd reckon.

Big Mac and I would not need to start apple bucking for at least another few weeks after that. And then we would keep busy until the start of winter. Gathering firewood, making sure we would have enough warm clothing, storing food in jars... The work truly had no end. I don't mean to say that like it's a bad thing. Hard work is what makes the world go 'round, and though I'm far too polite to go out and say it, I think Earth Ponies are the ones who work the hardest.

But no work today, or any day in the foreseeable future. Granny Smith pretty much insisted upon that. She said something to the like of, "young fillies like you need to relax now and then, else you'll look at your reflection one day and you'll be old as me. Take the month, find out something about yourself. Why, back in my day..." There was more to it of course, but once Granny Smith starts a sentence with 'back in my day...' or something to that effect the coherent part of the speech is pretty much done.

I was doing just what she said, though. Looking out the window at the endless rain, I saw my own reflection. Same ol' pony, long golden mane, cowgirl hat cleverly bobby-pinned to my mane to hold it in place, freckles, green eyes... The prospect of getting old actually frightened me much more when I was a younger filly. I used to ask Ma'ma all about what is what like to change and grow and the big impossible question that all ponies eventually ask 'what happens when you die?' Ma'ma would scold me and say things like, "if you spend all your time worrying about the future, you will miss out on living in the present."

Worldly wisdom, I suppose. I have certainly taken it to heart more in the last few years. Since the accident...

-0-

I'm still not ready to talk about any of that, though. So this journal I keep of my month of forced r&r will hopefully give me some insight into what I really want out of life. Or so Granny Smith thinks.

Was this Granny's way of finally confronting me about my impromptu Manehattan trip? After I came back, she was so happy and relieved but I could tell she was hurt. It truly is my biggest regret. Apple Bloom was so young at the time. To decide to up and move to run away from my problems on a whim, what was I thinking?

I shook my head a bit. It never seemed healthy to me to spend your spare thoughts to think of the past. I need to take Ma'ma and Granny's advice to heart and see what I can find out.

I took one last long look at the rain before deciding to head off to bed. Not a great start to my month of self-reflection, but it didn't feel like an omen, either. I will keep an open mind and maybe some new experience will get in that will change things.

Author's Notes

Takes place a few years before the start of the series. Will follow Applejack as she does some self-reflecting and meets a new friend by the name of Autumn Nocturne. This was really just a world building chapter, hopefully after I shake off some rust it will get more interesting.