So, readers, my name is Maria and I'm an author from Panama (you probably won't know where it is lol), and I love Harry Potter with passion, and I heard this song while watching a picture of Christian Coulson (who plays Tom Riddle in the second movie) and immediately thought of Bellatrix. I don't know if you've Heard the song "In the Dark" by Jojo, but I honestly suggest you to look for it and listen to it while you're Reading this, besides, the song is freaking amazing, but I know most of you probably don't have the same tastes in music as me, so enough with the rambling and let's read xD. Also, I'm fifteen and I don't really know how to properly write sex references, so excuse me if it sounds naive or innocent xD (I'm blushing right now xD).
Disclaimer: HP is property of the genius J.K. Rowling. I just play with it.
This ain't the first or last time
We'll meet up this late at night
To let my fate intertwine.
Casually I'd rather be
Detached from all tragedy
This don't need to be define.
Bellatrix POV.
I remember the last time we met. I can still taste the last kiss we shared. He wasn't Lord Voldemort yet, for me anyways. For me, he will always be Tom Riddle. I had left Hogwarts behind me as he did some time before me, looking for recognition, revenge, evilness, while I was just following him. No one else had taken that risk, and I was proud of it. We met in the Diagon Alley. It was around midnight, his favorite time to meet with me, when I felt a cold hand grab my cloth covered arm. When I turned around, I saw him, as handsome as always. The glint of evilness in his eyes had always made him more interesting for me, but that night they seemed to be shining even more under the moonlight. The sight of him almost made me regret the fact that I was going to stop our hook-ups that night.
"Bella…" He whispered with so much love that it was unthinkable to believe that he was going to become the true reincarnation of everything that we call evil, yet, all the wizards that got to know him knew it was going to happen.
"Tom, this has to stop." I hissed as he started to stroke my face gently, and then running his hands up and down my arms. His eyes flashed when I called him 'Tom'.
"I've told you not to call me that." He scolded, so calmly and lowly that it seemed that he didn't mean his words. Before I could have said something else, he took my hand and guided me through the dark Alley, whispering a spell so the tip of his wand lightened. I took a look at his outfit and noticed his robe was covering him more than usual. It was reasonable; muggles and wizards were looking for us, we were convicts. We couldn't take risks. We apparated to London, and to a place I knew too well. Tom's father's mansion, that stood proudly on top of a hill. Tom took my hand again and guided us inside. It looked exactly like how we had left it the night of the murder.
Before I had the chance to look around, Tom came to me and stood right in front of me, so close that I could feel his breath on my face. He took my face in his hands and kissed me breathlessly, making me go weak at the knees. I kissed him back with all my might, trying to feel as if he returned my feelings, which I wasn't sure of.
And I know that it's wrong
I do, I do
Once sun comes up I'll be gone
I only know him in the dark
His lips pressed against mine repeatedly, both of us used to the feeling. There was no way of fighting it any longer, it was already happening, so I forgot about denying him. All I could think about was how different I would see life if I got to have these kind of moments with him without any repression, with all our freedom, but I knew he would never love me like I loved him. We slowly took each other's clothes off, and soon fell into rhythm with each other, the clumsiness gone completely. We gave into each other, losing ourselves in the mean time.
When it was over, and we were both lying into the king sized bed, the thoughts started assaulting my mind. Why didn't I say 'no' tonight? Why didn't he? I knew deep down that it was wrong and that we would never be together like I wanted us to be. Severus, Lucius, Peter, Rodolphus, Narcissa… They would all hate me if they found out I was in love with the "Dark Lord". While thinking, I felt Tom shift in the bed and turn to me in his sleep, throwing his arm across my stomach and resting his head next to mine, his warm breath tickling my temple. Finally, sleep took over me and I fell into slumber looking at my lover's beautiful face.
The next morning I woke up, and Tom was still sleeping. I disentangled myself from his embrace, instantly missing his warmth. When I got up, I couldn't help but stop and stare a bit at his beautiful face in the relaxing sleep, smiling at how much I liked to just stare at him. I leaned down and gave him a kiss on the cheek, mumbling the words I would never be able to tell him; 'I love you.' I lifted myself off the bed and got dressed. Had I known this was the last time I would see him as the gorgeous man he was and that it was going to be the last time I would be able to kiss him and be intimate with him, I would have stayed much longer. Because that night, murdered the Potter's, but couldn't kill their little son, Harry, who returned the spell to Tom, causing him to almost die and lose his human body, turning him into almost nothing, causing his soul to be pulled apart. Because since that night he was known all over the magic world as Lord Voldemort, and Harry as the boy who lived. Because since that night all Tom cared about anymore was to get revenge, and forgot about everything. That's why I created such a big hate for the boy, because he took away the only person I cared about and loved. He turned into Lord Voldemort, and I turned into Bellatrix Lestrange, a Dead Eater.
Try to keep desensitized
Keep my feeling out of mind
My body won't be denied
Never been this road before
Love was always at the core
Of everyone I've been with before.
I only know him in the dark.
"Bellatrix" I felt someone shake my shoulders, as I stared absently at the lake in Hogwarts, a little while before my last meeting with Tom. I looked up with a glare to meet a pair of blue eyes staring down at me. Lucius sat next to me, handing me a paper that I even bothered in reading.
"You failed in Herbology." He said as a matter of fact. I shrugged. "I don't understand what's wrong with you. You barely care about school now."
"So what?" I spat at him. "I do what I want to do, mind your own business. Why don't you go see Narcissa or something?" I said angrily. A smirk grazed his features.
"Is it about Rodolphus?" My glare got more intense. I swear sometimes Lucius looked like a little girl asking about those things. This is the side of me I've always shown. I saved my sweet, tender, vulnerable and fragile side for Tom. I didn't even save it for Rodolphus, who would eventually become my husband. I just didn't feel a thing for him, I only loved Tom. "Okay, you don't have to kill me, okay? I came here to tell you that the Dark Lord wants to have a meeting with us today. Same place, same time, just be sure to be there, okay? It looks like something important." He said before getting up and leaving. Maybe he noticed how my eyes lit up at the sole mention of his name. I didn't really care, but my heart swelled at the thought of seeing him again. If I felt this way for him, why couldn't he love me? What was so wrong with me? The evilness was his only love, and I was nothing.
That night, after the meeting, Tom asked me to stay. I knew where this was going, but I didn't object. He came over to me and gave me a tender smile that scared the hell out of me. Even in his sweetest moments, he would still intimidate me. He took my hand in one of his and slid his other arm around my waist. His scent made me dizzy and my breathing got heavier. When we were close enough, he leaned down and kissed me sweetly, trying not to scare me when he saw my fear. Before I knew it, his mouth started going down my neck, leaving an ice-burning sensation. Once again, we were in the same compromising position we'd found ourselves in so many times before. Sex with someone slightly older than me seemed creepy for me, a 16 year old, but with Tom, it felt so right, like our bodies were made for each other. I seriously doubt someone else had gotten to see what was behind the excessive clothes and robes he wore, but it was the body of an angel, he had a rock hard athletic body. The thought of ever being intimate with Rodolphus made me sick, even though I had to do it eventually.
When it was over, and we were both spent and tired, he pulled me against his chest, running his fingers through my curls, something he rarely did, but felt very soothing.
"Do you remember… our first time? It was like this, wasn't it?" All I could do was nod against his chest as I summed into a sea of memories.
The shadows across his face
His lips a familiar taste
Stay focused I'll try
Can't get this out of my mind
I revolve in what this is, whatever we're calling this
The truth just breaks my heart
Flashback.
It was the night of the murder in the Riddle household. It was close to midnight as we walked up the hill, silently, with wands in hand. No one ever knew, but Tom asked me to go with him, and told me not to tell anyone. It kind of gave me hopes that he would be interested in me sentimentally. When we were outside the house, we looked through the window at the family gathered in the living room. Tom looked nervous, but decided.
"Bella, stay here, please. I promise it won't be for long." He whispered, knowing that I was only 15 years old and very naïve, and then gave me a kiss on the forehead, before entering the house. I hid as I heard the shattering, the yelps of pain, the screams for help and the "avada kedavras". When I stopped hearing the mess, I looked through the window again, and I saw everything was over. I came into the house and entered the living room, where Tom was sitting, deep in thought. He was sitting on the floor, looking down, hugging one of his knees tightly to his chest. Around him, the corpses of his father, step-mother and grandfather lay on the floor, lifeless. I examined the look in his eyes, and I could have sworn I saw a glint of regret in them, but I wasn't able to make sure of it. The moonlight entering through the window, coming across his face, made him look breathtaking, but like a heartbreaking beauty. I was mesmerized by him, but felt deeply sad for him. I got closer to him hesitantly, trying to give him some space.
"Tom? Are you okay?" I asked, looking down at him. He looked up at me, and gave me a crooked smile, the kind of smile you would like to see right before you die because it's so comforting.
"I am." He replied, standing up. He walked closer to me, and I saw his eyes examine my face. "You're so beautiful, Bella." He whispered, his voice shaking with unshed tears. He stroked my cheek and I unconsciously, leaned into his touch. He put one of his hands in my long hair, bringing me close, while the other circled my lower back. And then, he kissed me. The kiss that started everything, the kiss that made my heart pound so fast that I thought it was going to hammer through my ribcage. I put my hands in his pitch black hair, and kissed him back as best as I could.
That night was the beginning of the most breaking part of my life, but I wouldn't change it for anything. He touched me, and I touched him, and it all felt so right. Then, he put me to his chest and I fell asleep with him, just to leave right before he woke up.
End of Flashback.
I only know him in the dark
I only know him in the dark
I only knew him in the dark, because darkness was all around him. In the morning, I was Bellatrix Lestrange, and he was the Dark Lord, but only I learned how to love him. I loved him like no one could have ever, and now that he's back, there is no trace of the Tom Riddle I used to know, and all thanks to Harry Potter.
I missed our nights together, and I never thought I would fall in love with him out of nights full of passion, or waking up next to him in the mornings. I missed him telling me how beautiful I am, even though I lost my beauty in all these years of pain and hate. I miss him consoling me after I tortured the Longbottom's. But the real truth is that I only knew him in the dark.
So, what do you think? Good or bad? Please review, and thanks for reading, God bless you all! :)