One day in little old Inaba, Hanamura Yosuke was walking down the shopping district.
"I want to see if the book store has that book" he presses square and goes to the southern part of the district. He then see's Souji, his crush/partner/BFF/bowelcut standing by the tofu place.
"Souji! " Yousuke calls. Souji doesn't hear him because souji's too busy chatting up Rise whilst Yukiko is on one of his arms and Chie is on the other. Yosuke's heart sinks, why couldn't Souji love him… Yosuke stomps up to the three.
"SUP." He greets them bitterly. Souji wriggles his bowl cut and Rise wriggles her pigtails.
"you need something yosuke?" Yosuke turns at the sound of Kanji's voice coming from behind him. The tatami walks up to yosuke with a big ol' smile.
"im feeling a bit like crap, Kanji" Yosuke tells Kanji. Kanji walksup and embraces him. Souji starts sobbing because hes been with many girls during his highschool time but deep down he only wanted Yosuke, now he had lost him to kani-kun.
"cmon yosuke, lets go eat out." Says Kanji. Yosuke was close to making a stupid sex joke out of that, but thought itd bee cooler if he left Souji and his bowelcut, sobbing in the street with his three hussies.
"K, babeh" yosuke winks at Kanji, winks at Souji then winks at himself before linking arms with kanji and heading to a aiyas restaurant. Souji speeds after them, the speediness of his speed making a wind fly up the girls' skirts, except Rise cause I think she wears pants.
"open wide for the meat train!" Kanji says. Yosuke trys hard not to make another joke as Kanji feeds him that meat dimension stuff Souji always eats but can never finish cause he hasn't maxed out his stats yet.
"mmM! Tastes goob!" Yosuke says, happily eating. Souji busts into the aiya. The guy who works at aiya is like;
"hey! Get out! Don't bust in here like that!" Souji's bowlcut growls at the guy and guy shuts up.
"Yosuke! Youre coming back with me!" Souji informs the redhead (yosukes hair is actually brown) Kanji holds yosukes hand and yosuke blushes cause no ones held his hand before.
"you aint havin him, Senpai! He doesn't need someone Like you!" Kanji yells, desperate to keep Souji away from
Yosuke: The Greatest Man In Inaba.
Souji's hair does a 360.
"are you crazy? Those girls mean nothing!" he gets down on his knee then stands back up.
"theyre using me… they don't care about whats inside… they only care about me.. putting out." Souji admits, looking at the floor. Yosuke blows chunks all over Aiya floor because that's so slutty of Souji and the other girls. Yosuke stands, Kanjis hand in his.
"Lets go, Tatami, classy sophisticates such as ourselves need not associate with such a repulsive creature." Yosuke heads out.
"here here." Kanji replies, adjusting his monocle and scoffing at the miserable pile of Souji sitting dejectedly by the entrance. Yosuke and Kanji head out and walk off down the street. Souji sits sadly on the Aiya floor all regretful-like. He looks all pitiful and useless, The aiya man looks over the counter, spotting the poor excuse for Splooji sitting like a sadsack on the ground. He yells to cook.
"AYE YOU! TAKE OUT THAT TRASH IN THE ENTRANCE WAY, ITS STARTING TO STINK!"
It starts to rain as Yosuke and Kanji walk to yosukes house. Kanji pulls out a clear umbrella that he shoplifted and pops it up, pulling Yosuke under it all romantic like. Yosuke blushes cause Kanji is so big and tough and cool yet like a kitten inside cause he's all nice and stuff.
"Im so happy I picked you over Souji Seta" The redhead smiles. Kanji looks at him puzzled.
"Souji who?" he asks, then laughs. They both laugh cause its funny. Kujikawa, Satonaka and Amagi stand dripping wet in the rain in the street, waiting like sheep for their King Souji except they were sheep with a wet dog smell. Yosuke and kanji walk past all snuggled like. The three girls smell like wet dog.
Yosuke and kanji reach Hanamura residence. The house is exactly the same as Soujis cause inaba has one architect. They walk in and go upstairs to yosukes room.
"Damn, this room is nice" Kanji says, admiring the very BLAND room (it's the same as souji's)
"its not that great. Yosuke" Shrugs. Yosuke goes up to kanji and kisses him and Kanji yawned in yosukes face.
"im tired, Hanamura" Kanji says, flopping back on to the futon/bed/bluething in the cornrer but he hits his head on the wall and falls asleep or maybe unconscious who cares.
"sleep tight, beautiful" Yosuke says fondly, smiling down and Kanji Tatsumi who is oh so handsome.
BANG .BANG .BANG BOOOOOM!
The front door smashes open, splinters flying everywhere as Chie uses her manly force and Souji as a battering ram to get into the house. She sets Souji down, dusting off her hands. Souji shakes the splinters out of his bowelcat and struts into the kitchen.
"what are you doing?" asks yukiko politely. Souji flings open the fridge door, fetches a carton of milk and chucks it at Yukiko. the carton explouds! as it hits her mid section, the contents splattering all over her.
"Keep quiet!" King Souji commands. Yukiko cries and Rise embraces her. The milk was sour which made it funnier.
"we have to infiltrate Yosuke's bedroom, fell the beast Kanji and reclaim my Hanamura." Souji informs the girls, who nod in unison, save for yukiko who is sobbing over her red dress that's actually kinda cute but smells bad now. What they didn't know whas that yosuke was standing at the foot of the staircase all grumpy.
"what do you guys want." He asks angrily. Souji takes his stance, looking about.
"wheres Kanji?" he asks. Yosuke smirks.
"passed out in bed. Guess im amazing."
Souji's heart twists.
"you… and him… but.." Souji fell to his knees, shocked and distraught. Souji had wanted their first time to be together… now.. it wasn't gonna happen..
Suddenly, the walls broke away and cameramen ran in and some guy that's NOT ashton kutcher ran in, maybe adachi. Yeah ADACHI ran in with a mic and he ran up to Souji and was like
"you just got PUNK'D." Souji looks up at the camera and makes a face like 'aughh you got me, im so embarrassed' and Kanji runs down the stairs and hugs Souji and yosuke goes up to Souji and kisses Souji and is like;
"im sorry, honey, its you I wanted. All along" and Souji shakes his head laughing cause it was such a good punking. Everyone laughs cause its so funny and yosuke and Souji are a cute couple now and then Dojima walks in drunk and trips on the step.
"who built a step ther?" he asks with a horrifically drunken slur.
"thatd be the carpenters, sir" everyone choruses.
THE END