Summary: just really random things in Marik's day. Inspired by boredom, and myself, for doing wierd random things during a whole week.

Before we begin I would like to make a small note. Now stop throwing things at me and read it!! Or just scroll down. Its not that hard. Ok, like I was saying some of the things, well...alot of the things that happened in this story I acually did. Like, hating squirrels, and the smoothie thing. I love my inspiration. Thank you for your time, please enjoy this randomly wierd fanfiction.

Oh yea...disclaimers...AHEM I do not own smoothie mix anymore and I do not own Yu-gi-oh, or else I would be turning them all gay and Anzu would be dead by now. The only thing I own now is this bucket of fudge ice cream, which I bought for 5. 36 in the grocery store.

Saturday 7:13 a.m.

Mariks POV:

bleep...bleep...bleep...bleep...

"Bakura turn off that adamned alarm clock," I mumbled. I hate mornings, I can't think straight. My thoughts are more...curvy like...spatula's or something.
"What alarm clock?" Bakura said.
Oh no wait...we don't have an alarm clock. Probably my head or...WHY IS IT SO EARLY!?
I snuggled back under the covers. Stupid..head...clock thing. Should kill it. Throw it at some...thin.

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, the birds we're singing, and the squirrels were chattering endlessly. Mostly the sun was shining...right in my face. The dammed birds we're chirping endlessly. Agh! I can't stand it.

"Shut up you adamned things!!" I yelled out the window and chucked the nearest thing at them. Which just happened to be one of Bakura's dagger things. Well, at least thats what i thought it was. Anyway, it hit the nearest squirrel which fell out of the tree and started twitching violently. Oh well, one problem taken care of. Now I need to have Isis go make me breakfast.

"It's a beautiful morning!! ISIS!! WHERE'S THE COFFEE!!" I need coffee, coffee makes me run. Without my coffee I am a pile of uncoffeeless pile. Yes, I depend on Isis for everything. Well, almost everything. Why do I depend on her? I don't know.
It's cold in this house. Why is it cold? I don't know. It's already late summer, and cold! Oh look here comes Isis...

"Why don't you make your own coffee for once? It's not that hard and you don't have to get me up at seven in the morning...stupid freeloader," she said and started making coffee.

Coffee! My sweet coffee!! I'm not a freeloader. But who cares about that, I'm busy ranting about coffee!!

3 minutes later

COOOOOOOOOOFFFFFEEEEEE!! Caffinated. Isis should really learn not to give me caffinated beverages. I guess she doesn't know they make me crazy. Or, well, I'm already crazy so it would'nt make much of a difference. Why wouldnt it make a difference? I don't know.
Bakura comes down the stairs. I laugh at him. He's got funky bed head. It's like a white mass of...fluff. Which isn't like Bakura to be fluffy. I find myself poking his fluffyness. It's just so fluffy...and...out there. Like something fluffy.
"Get off my head," he growls.
OooOOoOoOoOoOooooooOOoh...Kura's angry! He's not a morning person as I can tell. What is the correct defintion..thing...for morning person? I will never know. I've got to figure out something to do today. Isis is mumbling something about kicking me out again, which means I'd have to live at Ryou's house. If Bakura isnt angry at me too. Then I'd go...somewhere. I havent thought that out quite yet. Oh I wonder if we have Oreo's.

I have found myself on the computer. Computery...Isis taught me how to use it. I pity her. Not really, MUAHAHAHA!! There's this thing called MSN instant messaging. See I memorized it! It's got all these people I despise but know on it who have nothing better to do than talk to eachother. Yea, that'd be me. Isis thinks I'm crazy. So does Kura though. Which makes things even out like pavement. Does pavement even out? I don't know.
3 hours and a bag of chips later

I'm now playing a fun game Isis likes to call 'mope around the house saying your bored every few seconds just to annoy the shit out of your sister and your boyfriend'. It's quite a fun game but it seems I never win. Or else if getting kicked out is winning, then I've won every time. Isis suggests a go out and have a healthy relationship with some woman. No thanks...women scare me. Especially that Anzu chick. I wish I could beat her head in with a stick...repeatedly...over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again! Till she bleeds! Then throw her in the ocean for the fishies to eat. Mabye they don't want to eat her though, she's icky. Besides, Kura works fine for me. We go together like uh...jelly beans. He doesnt like me at sometimes, which means that him and Isis work together to kick me out, but deep down he loves me! Like his hair, fluffy like.

I think Isis is only minutes away from kicking me out, which means I should quit my game and do something with myself. Does jacking off in the shower count? Eh, obviously not.

Hey I got kicked out. WOOT!! So did Bakura!! Hug time! O-o or not. Kura's yelling at me now.

"We could always go to Ryou's. He's got food. Then again most of my stuff is there," Kura says.
"Or we could just sit out here and kill things till she leaves," I suggest.

"Didn't you kill a squirrel this morning?" He looks at me evilly.
"Uh, yea I think I did, but I'm not really sure cause I didn't have my coffee yet."

"Sure..."

Kura went to go get his knife/dagger thing out of the squirrel. Oh ra I was in trouble. I'm not allowed to touch Kura's stuff. Well, only a few things. evil snicker Now back to the fact that Bakura's got that evil look in his eye and is slowly, yes I said slowly, walking twards me. Why is he slowly, yes I said slowly, walking twards me? I don...no wait I think I do know! No, wait...no I don't.

4 hours and a rotting squirrel later

Isis finally let us back in the house. She felt sorry for me. Or maybe it was the squirrel. I don't know, but she went out to this strange art exhibit thing. Which left me, hungry, and looking for something fruity to eat, since I had been on the computer, staring at this bowl of fruit. I think Isis calls it a saver screen or something. I'm desperately searching through the fridge. Mayo,cheese, eggs, butter, coke, somethin moldly...nope, nothing fruity. I wonder if Bakura can cook? I won't ask. There's Mr. Clean magic erasers underneath the cubord. I wonder if they taste any good. Last time I ate windex though, Kura and Isis put me on medication. shudders (1)

OH HAPPY DAY!! I found some frozen..splurshie? Slurpie...spur...moth...SLUSHIE! No wait thats not it either. smo...smoothie thats it.(2) I found frozen smoothie mix in the freezer. It has pictures of fruit on it, so I'm sure it tastes fruity. Yet again, I can't cook, nor even make myself a bowl of cereal. But I would prevail at this!! What does prevail mean? I don't know. (3)

Instructions: dump whole bag into bowl...check! Add packet of mix to bowl..check! But what the crap is this white stuff? It looks like crack or maybe some illegal drug..(4) oh well, step three...add 2 cups of water to bowl. Uh...how much is two cups? and of water? Time to bounce over to Kura!!

Kura doesnt know either. And the lady who's writing this fic doens't include him enough!! (a/n: IM SO SORRY!! cries I can't do Bakura very well. Other than when he's being really evil!) Uh, I found this one thing called a measure cup. I think it could do with a cup. But I can't read so I don't think it does. How did I read directions and not the measure cup? Well, its simple acually. Sometimes the gods feel really sorry for me cause I'm so crazy, so sometimes they insert intellegent thoughts into my mind so I can funtion relyably for a few seconds. In other words I don't know.

Filling up the measure cup. Hehe! I rhymed. If it weren't for my wierd sadistic side that kills squirrels, Kura would have killed me a looooong time ago. Or not. Ok cup is filled to 2 cups. So I pour it in the bowl. Next step!! Blend until fruit is mixed into mulch. What the crap is mulch? I guess I blend it till it looks like slop. Or mulch.

"AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!! DIE EVIL FRUIT DIE!!!!" I yell.
"MARIK SHUT UP!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THERE?" Kura's not a happy camper.

"Nothing kura-KUN!"

Die fruit die!! ehehehhe!!! This is kindof fun acually, if I didn't get fruit crap all over the...everywhere. I think Kura's mad. Well, worse than usual. I'm going to sleep on the couch tonight. I just know it.

the fruit smoothies are done!! somewhat...

Yup, even though this is Isis's house, I'm sleeping on the couch tonight. It's not that bad. I've got my smoothie thing!! It tastes yummy too, so I stuck it in the freezer. Bakura threw out my yummy cup of the stuff, so I stole all his clothes while he was taking a shower. That led into him tying me upside down from the ceiling fan, which led to me giving out Yami blackmail, which led to him killing my pet kitty, which led to me duct taping him to the couch, which led to him putting me in the freezer, which basically led to us making out on the couch. (5)

Isis came home and yelled at me again. So now I have to clean the kitchen. Scrubbing the dishies is quite fun, I even got to eat a Mr. Clean eraser thing. They taste like foam. How do I know what foam tastes like? I don't know.

11:23 pm

I'm sleeping on the couch, SLEEPIN ON THE COUCH!! Singin to myself! Yes, I get to sleep on the couch, and now I'm suddenly getting a craving for that fruit crap. There is no spoon. Acually there is, its right in front of me. I've been watching the matrix all night now, since I get to sleep on the couch. Ehehhehe. You know, I learned now not to freeze things. Its hard as a rock!! gaaaaaah!! Or other hard things that are hard! Waiting waiting...this stuff isnt going to melt. Maybe if I glare a little harder. grrr...no that just gives me a headache. So I guess I need to start scraping.

bang...bang...bang..bang...bang...bang...bang...ban...g....

my spoon broke. I shall need a new one!!

bang bangbangbangbang...bang...bang....

It looks like raw meat now. Skishy raw meat that Kura would eat. haha! More rhyme! I'm gonna pound it with my hand now, cause the spoon aint working.

a freezerburned hand later

My hand is freezerburned. oh well I get yummy fruity stuff!

"What are you doing," I hear a voice strangely similar to Bakura's behind me asking me what I'm doing. Odd.

"Nothing," I reply ever so inocently!

Ahem, next thing I know, the bowl is on the floor and I'm going to end up really sore in the morning. The bowl sat on the floor, untouched, and still with frozen goo in it. I guess I'll leave it for in the morning, I'm 'busy' now, leave a message after the manical laughter. And if this is Yami, I DON'T WANNA TALK TO YOU!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

The smoothie, in the bowl, on the floor, left there for hours...

BAD

IDEA.

(1) I've been reading too many other fanfiction

(2)yes i cannot remember the word 'smoothie'

(3) over used word of mine

(4)IT DOES LOOK LIKE SOME ILLEGAL WHITE POWDER!! LIKE ANTHRAX!!

(5) which then led to...

Ok!! I've been wanting to write this for uh...a day. But still. I CANT PRODUCE GOOD FANFICTION!! Evil, pah. Anyways, I'm guessing I'll do this for a whole week. I finally have something to do with my boring crappy life. This was a very short fic. It took me an hour to write. and there will be more graphic yaoi in the following chapters I promise! Oh well yawns I love Marik, he and Kura are my role models. That's why I'm being sent to the insane asylum. Goodbye all! DONT FORGET TO COMMENT YOU WORTHLESS FOOLS!! oh look hot pockets.