Dear Journal,
I did it today. So many times I've told myself that I couldn't risk it but I just can't anymore. Its just like how it all started. I just had to! Elena deserved something, anything that I could give her. The note wasn't much but it said what I could tell her. Plus, I wasn't sure when he would come back from his transformation "activities." This was the first time I tried anything while he was away. I figured it would be safe since I came back and there was no way to track it. By the time he gets back, it will be halfway to her…I hope.
That isn't the only thing I hope for. After everything that has happened, I wonder if she will even want me back. It's not like what happened is in my distant past, not like last time. Its easier to forgive the distant past but this? How can she forgive this?
But of course, she'll make it too easy for me. She always does. Every time I try to hide from her or push her away, she always pushes through my defenses to the heart of me. Just like every time before, I will no we will become stronger for it. I have faith in that. I have faith in her. She has always trusted me and I will trust her. Together, our trust and our love will pull us through this. I just know it!
Stefan pulled out the only picture he has of Elena, the one he drew so long ago while she was sleeping. He imagined her reaction to his note, how her face would light up with utter joy. After putting his only possessions back in their hiding places, he drifted to sleep thinking of her and the next time he'd see her again.
Dear Diary,
I received the first glimmer of hope/joy in a long time today. A letter from Stefan! I had to read it at least four times before I could see through the tears in my eyes. It wasn't much but it was all that I needed.
Elena,
These four things you have to know: I'm alive. I'm sorry for what happened. I love you! And I will come back for you! All my love,
Stefan
Relief swept through me after each sentence but most important to me were the final two: He loves me and he's coming back for me! How can I give up or "move on" like some of my friends want when he isn't either? I just can't! I wouldn't have even if I hadn't received this letter! So many times I've almost lost Stefan but somehow he always comes back: after Damon's attack on Bonnie, after the Miss Mystic Falls event, after Jenna stabbed herself, after him getting trapped in the tomb with Katherine. We've always found a way to return to one another's arms. We'll figure out a way this time too! I'm even more sure of it now! I'm never going to give up on finding Stefan! Ever!
Elena smiled as she put her diary back in its place. Opening the note one more time, she touched the words he had written to her and imagined him writing them. She drifted to sleep thinking of his return to her arms, her bed, her life.