A/N: So I'm like really bored and is still working on chapther 4 of a happy family. SO I decied to do this :D I DO NOT OWN APH OR ILAMAS AND HATS

Day 1

Alfred (America) was walking home from a local Mac'Dolands. Ivan (Russia) had came to stay with him and he didn't like the smell of gressy foods. When Alfred walked into his house he smelt something..awful. Then he saw it. A (a/n: PLEASE FORGIVE ME KIKU (japan) FANS ) dead Kiku on the floor.

"…IVANN THERES A DEAD JAPPENSE BOY IN MY HOUSE" Aflred poked him with his foot.

"Oh..hey..how'd did he get here" Ivan waved abit as he threw the large knife behind him witch stabed poor Arther in the head. (A/N: poor poor England)

"IIVVVAAANN what did you do" Alfred pouted.

"Me? Nothing. I didn't do this."

"Okay then explain what happened then" Alfred taped his foot.

"I've never seen him before in my life"

"Why did you kill this person Ivan?" Alfred once again poked Kiku.

"I do not kill people…th-that is my least favorite thing to do. Da" He put on that smile.

"Tell me then Ivvan extacly what you where doing before I got home"

"Alright..well I was up staris-"

"Uh huh"

"I was I was uh sitting in my room-"

"Yea"

"I was reading a book-"

"Go on"

"And uh this guy walked in-"

"Oookay"

"So I went up to him-"

"Yes?"

"And I uh well I stabbed him thirty-seven times im the chest" Ivan looked around.

"IIIVVVAAANN that kills people"

"O-oh oh wow I I did not know that Da"

"How could you not know that" Alfred did that thing where they stick out there arms.

"well uh.. I guess I ug suck?" Then Alfred noticed something about Kiku

"what happened to his hands?"

"Whats that?"

"His hands, those things we use to hold stuff with, wh-why are they missing" alfred eyes narrowed

"Well I uh I uh kinda cooked them up and ate them" Ivan patted his stomach.

"IIIvvvaaan" Alfred stared at him like 'wait-what?'

"We-well I was uh hungry well you know and crave hands"

"WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU DO THAT?"

"I was hungry for hands give me a break"

"IIIVVVVAAANNN"

"My tummy was maken the rummbies"

"Ivan"

"that only hands would staify"

….

"What is wrong with you Ivan" Alfred stared and like Ivan had just kicked a puppy. And not a ugly one ethier a very cute one.

"Well I kill peopl and eat hands that could be one thing"

A/n: poor poor Alfred ..OK so imma make this like a 7 chapther thing ~one week with Ivan~ and its gonna be based off of the funny stuff I see and hear oh and the whole think about Japan is cuz of the Russo-Japnese war