A/N: My problem is is that I have too many damn ideas and my brain is malfunctioning due to the overload. I caught myself working on Daddy Won't You Please Come home and then a week later have about six different ideas for a story. It's annoying, I'll tell you that much. But none of these ideas will leave my head, and it's pissing me off. Um ... this little snippets is random and the story is AU so we don't really have a timeline, cept that this is after Buu Saga. This story don't really serve a purpose, just written for the amusement that is GokuxChi-Chi. I just wanted ya'll to see how she would be if she was saiyan for a year. Remember, I own nothing!
ADDENDUM. I HAVE CREDITED GOKU'S DONUT!
"Kakarot...what the devil is this?! Why does your woman have a tail?!"
~Vegeta.
Saiyan for a Year
Chi-Chi was scrubbing the dishes in the kitchen when she finally realized she was home alone. Again.
Despite having fallen into the traditional housewife role and that she gladly took up the amount of household chores she had to do, washing dishes would always be one thing she hated doing. She would, all rather sweep, dust, or even fold the laundry than wash dishes. It was somewhat of a disappointment when she found out that the only things her family could do were eat, sleep, and work; work being the most rare of the three. Gohan was out with his fiancee Videl on a double-date with some of his old friends from school, and Goten, thankfully, was with Trunks over at Bulma's.
And Goku...
Only the gods knew where he was.
Honestly, it made her angry!
Downright furious, actually!
She pushed a hand through her hair, fingering the ebony locks, frustrated by her own ineptitude. Indeed she did wear it down. She had been opting for something new; she was tired of wearing it in a bun all of the time, even if it was the most convenient style for her. Having her hair whipping in her face wasn't exactly something she wanted, if she was going to be running after Goten all the time. It had grown considerably longer than what it used to be, falling to her mid-back in a pool of charcoal.
"Oh, that tears it!"
Now, it flared about her face as she stomped out of the kitchen, leaving the soapy dishes behind. Opening her bedroom door, she retrieved a small pouch, the bag containing seven shining spheres. Well, if she couldn't find Goku, there was always another way to know where he was.
The Dragonballs.
She'd 'borrowed' them from Bulma for just such an occasion. Exiting the hut, she cast hem down them upon a grassy knoll just outside the porch, raised her arms and uttered the words of power.
"Shenron!" She commanded, struggling to quell her quivering upper lip. "Arise!"
At first, nothing happened.
And then it happened. They started glowing. Pulsing with light a heartbeat later, darkening the sky, the starry horizing fading to an eerie, pitch black. Despite having seen it many a time before, Chi-Chi gawped at the sight, wincing as golden lightning streaked across the sky. She was suddenly, intensely, nervous. She'd never summoned the dragon by herself before. She'd never had a reason to, until now.
"I! RETURN!"
A streak of light jolted up from the seven balls, hurtling the unfortunate woman into a tree before winding and spiraling its way into the sky above. Chi-Chi watched it take shape, assuming flesh and form. Imagine her awe when she saw the sheer size of the creature, in all its green-scaled glory. Baleful red eyes regarded her as though he were but an insect, a mere drop in the ocean of life. Goku's wife swallowed, her anger faltering beneath the weight of its almighty gaze.
"Oh. Its you." Shenron rumbled. "One of Goku's friends-
"His wife!" Chi-Chi shouted!
"Why have you summoned me?"
"I have a wish to make!" Chi Chi answered. "I want you to bring Goku back here, right now!"
"Very well!"
There was a silence.
"Son Goku does not wish to be summoned." Shenron answered after a moment. "He is sparring with the one known as Vegeta."
Of course he was! All her husband ever did was eat, sleep, and train. Honestly, he was worse than her children sometimes!
Hard-headed delinquents, the lot of them! she thought fiercely.
"That dolt." She mumbled. "Must be nice, being a saiyan." She sighed in a small voice. "All he does is eat, sleep, and train. Wish I knew how that felt...
Shenron inclined its head, eyes aglow.
"Wish granted, woman!"
Chi-Chi balked, hands flying to her face.
"What?! Wait! No! Don't!"
Too late.
"So be it!" Shenron boomed! "It shall be done!" His red eyes glowed, and a column of light shot up around Chi-Chiand enveloped him. She wanted to scream, but the words refused to come. She could feel, it; pure power, flooding her every pore. Energy, rushing through every cell in her body. It felt like she was self-destructing but at the same time revitalizing, being reborn. The sensation, lasted for only a instant, before the heavenly light faded and Chi-Chi found herself standing in the clearing again, utterly unchanged. She looked down at his hands, confused, relieved.
"Oh, thank goodness." She breathed. "For a second there, I thought you actually made me a saiyan-THE HELL?!"
Then she felt it.
Motion, just above her backside. Something stirring beneath her no. Oh no no nononono. Trembling fingers peeled back the hem of her gown, discarding the apron she wore like so much tissue paper. Ebony black orbs flew wide open as a something soft and furry was set free from her back. A tail. And then there it was. To Chi-Chi's initial dismay the tail-her tail!-swayed before her face, black as pitch a perfect match for her hair. Oh dear kami! This was bad. Thiis was very bad! This...why was she so concerned again? She felt strange. Giddy. Euphoric. As if she'd just won the lottery. Only better. She bounded on the balls of her feet threw a handful of punches, tossed a fews kicks, all in an instant. Grinned. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. No, this wasn't bad at all! She felt a niggling sense of worry, but it was oddly diminished, almost as if it'd never been.
"Alright!" she exclaimed. "I had no
"What is your next wish?" the dragon demanded.
"Hold your horses!" Chi-Chi shouted, her fierce words quelling even the eternal dragon. "I want to see something!" Swift as her newfound speed could carry her, she leapt off the porch and darted back inside. She came back out wearing her old blue gi from her very first tournament with Goku. She clutched a mirror in her hand.
"Now, lets see...
Chi-Chi examined herself in a handheld mirror, carefully observing every flaw and wrinkle. The crow's feet around her eyes, the lining of her face, the gray hairs, every evidence of age. The years may have been kind to Goku but not to Chi-Chi. Giving birth to two children had taken a terrible toll on her body, in more ways than one. She pushed her breasts up, scowling as they sagged. Gods, I've gotten old! She didn't look a thing, like the beautiful lass she'd been on her wedding day. She looked like an old hag! Old! Ugly! Inexplicably her newfound blood began to boil. How was it that Goku aged so well, just because he was a saiyan? It wasn't fair!
Well, she mused, that's easily remedied.
"Shenron!"
"Have you finally made up your mind, woman?"
Chi-Chi nodded. She felt like this was a terrible misuse of the dragonballs, but the opportunity was simply too good to pass up. She hadn't wanted to become a saiyan-far from it!-but now that she was she felt all of the old pride and confidence that came with it. There was power in her blood now, coursing through her veins. Fierce power. She could understand why Vegeta was so stuck-up whe it came to surpassing Goku. That was his pride. Chi-Chi's pride lay in her sons and her husband, but also in her appearance. In the end, it wasn't much of a surprise when her vanity won out.
"Make me young again so that I may never grow old!" She paused as the dragon's eyes glowed in warning. "Grant me eternal youth!" Kami, I hope I worded that right!
"It shall be done."
Chi-Chi hazarded a glance down at herself, blinking in surprise as the dragonballs wound back time. She held up the mirror and marveled at herself as everything began to change. First the wrinkles in her face vanished before her very eyes, dissipating like steam, rising off her face. Her sagging bustline became pert and her figure taut, her receding hairline full and long and lush. Even the old aches in her bones fell to the power of the balls, leaving her feeling fresh issapeared the ravages of times wiped out Within mere moments she was in her twenties again, full of the same youthful vigor she'd known before giving birth to her wonderful baby boys, before years of worry and concern and ruined her figure forever. The blue gi fit snugly now just as it had all those years ago.
"Your wishes have been granted!" Shenron thundered aloud, ascending ever higher into the sky. "Until we meet again, mate of Goku! Fare thee well!" Chi-Chi looked on in silence as the eternal dragon came apart, splitting into seven bars of light, and became the dragonballs once more. As one, they blasted outward, splitting off in seven simultaneous directions. Dark skies brightened once more, and the winds abated. All was normal. Almost. Chi-Chi heaved a hearty sigh of relief. She was awfully hungry all of a sudden. Thankfully, she still remembered how to cook! If not, she could always hunt something. Like...fish! She was certainly in the mood for fis-
She paused in midstep, her attention riveted upon the horizon. She stood and watched as distant speck grew larger and larger still, until at last, she could discern some measure of it. The white cape, fluttering against the harsh breeze summoned by the speck's movement, was a dead give-away. She bit back her initial disbelief as that speck resolved into the turban-clad form of Piccolo. He did not look pleased. It took all she had to appear nonchalant as those eyes fixated upon her, pinnioning her with a gaze. He descended abruptly before, the sudden motion elicting a sharp gust of wind as his pointed shoes settled upon the path leading to their porch.
"Hello, Piccoolo." Her usual animosity for the green-skinned warrior was practically non-existent in her greeting. "Goku's not here-"
"I'm not here for Goku."
"Ah?"
The namekian warrior scowled at her, then stole a glance at the sky.
"Dende sensed that the dragonballs were being used." His stare spoke volumes. "In this location."
A butterfly of dread fluttered in Chi-chi's stomach.
"Oh...
"You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?"
"N-Not at all!"
Piccolo scowled at Chi-Chi as he paused in his observation of the clouds. "I suggest you cease in this foolish game of cat and mouse and tell me the truth," the pointy-eared Namek berated, his mouth transfixed into an annoyed frown. "I'll ask you again. Do you know who used them?"
Chi-Chi fidgeted, pushing a booted foot into the ground, as though she could quash all her worries beneath her heel.
"I...might have borrowed them from Bulma...
Piccolo growled in frustration at the woman in front of him, curling his knife-like fingers into fists.
"Dd you use them?"
Chi-Chi stuck out her tongue in mild embarassment; the expression was oddly Goku-like.
"Maaaaybe...
As if on cue, he saw Chi-Chi's tail, peeking out from beneath her gi. Now, Piccolo was now fool. He'd been wise-exceptionally so-long before his union with Kami. When they were finally forced to reunite out of necessity his already considerable powers of observations were boosted to unimaginable heights. Even without them he knew what his eyes were telling him. What the tail meant. He'd never seen Chi-Chi with a tail for as long as he'd lived and he'd visited the Son household many number of times. That she'd used the dragonballs and suddenly had a tail could only mean one thing...
It took all Piccolo had not to roar in disbelief; because he was absolutely furious!
"Are you insane?!" Piccolo shouted, his burly voice halting the playful banter in mid-flight. "You summoned the dragon and wished yourself to be a saiyan, didn't you?!" he finished, the word 'idiot' caught in his throat. A small 'meep' of surprise escaped the gi-clad woman, faltering beneath his stare. She knew the tail was obvious, but even she didn't except the Namekian warrior to suss her out so swiftly.
"The second wish." Piccolo growled. It was not question.
"I may have-
"Stop fooling around!"
-wished for eternal youth." Chi-Chi finished meekly.
"You did what?!"
"It's not my fault! I didn't mean to wish for it! It was an accident, and the dragon wouldn't take the wish back! The eternal youth...well, its not fair that Goku should age so well and I can't! I mean-
Chi-Chi's stomah growled just then, interrupting her. Piccolo sweatdropped. He knew that sound all too well.
"Lovely," she sulked, coming back to herself. "I've even got a saiyan's appetite!"
"Oh, Goku's going to love this!" The namek threw up his hand in exasperation. "Finally,someone with an appetite to match his!"
"Do you know where he is?" Chi-Chi asked, eyes shining.
"Of course I know where he is!"
"Take me to him!" She demanded.
"You're unstable! There's no way I'm going to-
"TAKE ME TO HIM! NOW!"
Even the almighty Piccolo was made helpless before her sudden fury. Were her eyes green, just now? Oooh no! He wasn't thinking about that! The last thing he wanted to imagine was a super-saiyan Chi-Chi! Surely the earth would end if such an event evercame to pass! Finding no other alternative, he reluctantly reached for her wrist. She slapped it aside.
"I'll fly mysef!" She retorted. "You lead the way!"
"Since when can you fly?" Piccolo deadpanned. "That's something you have to learn, Chi-Chi."
Just like that, she was all smiles again.
"Oh...sorry."
Piccolo shook his head ruefuelly. and carefully wrapped an arm around her waist.
"Hold tight." he said in a flat tone. "I'll take you to the lookout, see if there's a way to reverse this."
But I don't wanna reverse it!
Chi-Chi complied, all the while unaware of the inner turmoil raging within the Namekian's mind.
I have a bad feeling about this...
Because from the look of what had just happened on the porch of 439 East District, Piccolo could tell that he wouldn't be meditating anytime soon. Not today. Nor tomorrow. Maybe not even next week. Until the dragon could be summoned and the wish could be undone, Chi-Chi would have to accept her newfound heritage. Vegeta wasn't going to like this. Goku probably wouldn't care, one way or the other, but he'd probably be of the opposite opinion where Vegeta was concerned. He wasn't quite sure what was going to happen in the next year, but he was certain of thus:
Goku...you have my pity.
A/N: Poor Goku. You finally have a wife that can somewhat keep up with you and now you're terrified out of your mind! Vegeta isn't going to like this, especially when one considers HE could've used the same wish for Bulma. Anywho, I'm off to work now and I look forward to reading your reviews upon my return. I sincerely hope you liked it so, in the immortal words of Atlas...
...REVIEW, WOULD YOU KINDLY?
I'll even give you a preview, just as a little treat to review:
"I'm...not quite sure you're ready for this just yet."
"Excuse me?"
The look that he was receiving from his wife made him want to bolt from his spot in the gravity chamber, but the fear welling up inside of him told him to stay right where he was. Watching his wife struggle to contain her animosity was scaring him, her flowing black locks flaring as if she were getting ready to use the Kaio-ken technique times four. The Saiyan briefly wondered if she had picked up on the skill. She definitely had the potential to use now that she was a saiyan. Why did that excite him? He wasn't feeling very excited now however, not as he drew back, shooting him another one of her death-induced glares; he eeped in fear.
"What did you just say?"
"Erm...nothing!"
"You...you think I'm weak, didn't you?!"
"I never said that!"
"No, but you were thinking it!"
Goku gulped nervously, edging backwards. This would not end well for him.
"Now Chich, just calm down...
She rushed him, fists flying.
"I'll show you calm!"
Faced with such adversity, Son Goku took the only possible action of recourse.
"YOINK!"
He ran. He ran for his life, from his wife!
"Son Goku, you get back here right now!"
"S-Sorry Chi-Chi! Can't hear you!" He took off at a breakneck pace, seemingly forgetting that it was well within his ability to fly, instead of run.
"Come back here, coward! Fight me like a man!
Hope you enjoyed it! If Chi-Chi's this feisty, they'll probably get another kid out of this...wonder what his/her name will be...
...suggestions?
R&R! =D