HOW FICKLE MY HEART
Last Goodbyes
During her journey to Olympus Annabeth couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, that something just didn't add up. It wasn't that she didn't want to see her mother, she did- she really did, but something was just off about this meeting. She had been summoned, there were no other words for it, Athena had summoned her to Olympus, and Annabeth had no choice but to go. Even if her mother wasn't a goddess she wouldn't refuse to see her, but she had never been summoned before.
When she entered the lobby of the Empire State building it was quiet-too quiet. There were no tourists milling about, no staff cleaning the building, no one behind the front desk. If the doors had been locked she would have assumed the building was closed, as it was it seemed to be abandoned. This was just more evidence to prove her theory that something wasn't quite right with this whole ordeal. Later she would kick herself for continuing to the 600th floor, she would wonder why she didn't just turn around and leave, she was a child of Athena for crying out loud she should have known something was wrong. But she knew she never would have turned around, she never would have gone back to Camp Half Blood without seeing what her mother wanted to talk about first. There could have been an army of monsters in the lobby and she still would have tried her hardest to reach Olympus. As it was an army of monsters probably would have hurt a lot less than what she did find when she eventually met with her mother.
Her nervousness continued to escalate the closer she was the 600th floor. She couldn't explain her anxiety. She trusted her mother, she might not trust anyone else on Olympus, but in her heart she knew- she just knew that she could trust Athena. Later she would wonder if thinking with her heart instead of her head was why she was stuck in a situation she couldn't escape. She would wonder why she ever listened to her heart in the first place, it was such a fickle thing- easily tricked and manipulated and easily hurt. She knew of nothing that could compare to the unbearable pain of a broken heart, and she would never leave hers open for such an attack ever again. She would never trust anyone ever again, never fully anyway. But at the time she listened to her heart, where her head was screaming that this was all wrong, her heart was whispering that everything was, or at least would be, alright.
The ding of the elevator interrupted her musings and signaled her arrival on Olympus. The doors opened and once again where she expected to see a crowd of people going about their daily activities she saw nothing. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping. All seemed normal, except for the abundant lack of people. She stepped off the elevator and just stood there. She turned her head left and right, taking up the scenery and looking for her mother. She didn't see her anywhere, she didn't see anyone, and her blood began to race as her heart began to beat. Where was everyone?
"Annabeth," a voice said softly off to her right. She turned her head and saw her mother, Athena in all her glory.
"Mom," Annabeth replied with a smile, it quickly fell from her face when her mother did not smile back. "What's going on?" She asked confused, gesturing around to the empty space that surrounded them.
"This is something we must do alone." Athena replied cryptically.
"Okay," she drew the word out, "If I may ask, what exactly are we doing?"
"We're implementing the plan to defeat Kronos."
"Alright," Annabeth replied still confused, "is it a secret or something?"
"Or something," her mother mumbled.
"Are you alright? You seem distracted."
Athena shook her head as if to clear it and focused on her daughter. Her face seemed one of grim determination, but her eyes- her eyes were those of a person defeated. Her eyes were suspiciously shiny, as if she had been crying only moments before Annabeth's arrival. Her eyes were full of such despair that Annabeth was having a hard time believing they were planning on how to defeat the Titan, Athena gave the impression that he had already won.
"Okay…"Annabeth paused to think of how she wanted to phrase her next question, "What do you need me to do? How can I help?"
If anything the question made her mother's mood worse. She sighed in defeat and pinched the edge of her nose in exasperation. She took a deep breath before she began, "You know that Kronos is in Luke's body right?" Annabeth's earlier enthusiasm left her in one fowl swoop; she nodded in response unable to find her voice. "We- some of the gods think that Luke might still be influencing Kronos." Annabeth nodded again to show that she was paying attention. "Well…we also know that you have a friendship with Luke, and…"she trailed off awkwardly.
"And?" Annabeth asked, she still didn't understand exactly what the plan was.
"We need you to go to him, on the Princess Andromeda and find out what his plans are. We need you to use your friendship with Luke to get information on Kronos."
"I'm not sure how much influence you think Luke has over him," Annabeth began slowly, "but I'm pretty sure he'll know that's exactly what I'm doing."
"We know that. It's just we think that Luke's attraction to you is also…I mean it's possible that…um"
"We think Kronos has the hots for you." Another voice interrupted.
Athena shot a glare to whoever was behind the tree to her left.
"Yes, we think that Kronos has an attraction to you. It would explain while you're still alive even though he had ample time to kill you on your quest for the Golden Fleece. It would also explain why he tried to kill Percy. Some of us," she glared at the tree, "believe that he's trying to kill Percy because he sees Percy as competition for your affections."
"Percy? But I don't…I mean Percy and I aren't-"Annabeth couldn't even think of how to respond to that, luckily she didn't have to, at least not coherently anyway.
"Oh please," Aphrodite said stepping out from behind the tree and stopping beside Athena, "anyone with eyes can see that you have a thing for the boy, and he has one for you too."
"Really?" Annabeth asked, cursing how hopeful she sounded.
"I told you that would be a problem," Aphrodite said to Athena.
"What are you two talking about? How are me and…Percy and problem?" Annabeth asked awkwardly, confused on how to address whatever 'thing' her and Percy apparently had to each other.
"Why your love for the Jackson boy of course," Aphrodite said with a menacing grin, "what would poor Kronos do if he knew you didn't return his love? What would he do if he knew you were really in love with the Son of the Sea?"
"But Percy doesn't- I don't," Annabeth groaned in frustration. There wasn't anything between Percy and herself, but how she hoped there actually was, and if this meeting ever ended she was going to leave Olympus and tell Seaweed Brain just how she felt.
"Wait," she said her brows furrowing in confusion, "why should I care if Kronos likes me or not? I thought you wanted me to get information from him because he likes me, what does me liking him have to do with anything?"
She looked between the two goddesses before she had an epiphany and finally realized what this meeting was about. "No, she said shaking her head and backing away from them, "no way. I think I can pretend to have feelings for him, but I can't actually have feelings for him."
"Sure you can." Aphrodite said with a smile.
"Maybe you know if I had time to develop feelings, and you know if he wasn't evil or anything." She replied hotly.
"You miss understand me Child of Athena," Aphrodite said her smile vanishing, "I am the goddess of love and I determine your feelings and who you have them for."
"You're going to make me fall in love with Kronos!" She yelled outraged, it wasn't a question but a statement, she looked straight at her mother as she said it.
How could her mother play with her heart like that? It was one thing for Aphrodite did it, she lived for nothing but to manipulate people, but her mother. As the shock faded and Annabeth looked at it logically it made sense, and she hated that she could make sense of this madness, she hated that she could justify her mother's actions. She hated that she couldn't even be angry at Athena because it was a sound plan, and a good way to gain intelligence on their enemy.
"You do know that if I go to the ship he'll probably bind me to him magically. You know I won't be able to help you guys, you know I won't be able to do anything to hurt him, right?" She asked Athena.
Her mother nodded gravely.
"And you," she turned to Aphrodite, "You know if you make me love him I won't help you, even if I could I wouldn't."
Aphrodite nodded and a smile returned to her face.
"So if I'm magically bound to him," she said looking at Athena, "and emotionally," she said the word with distaste as she looked back to Aphrodite, "bound to him. How in Hades do you expect me to get inside information for you?"
"Don't worry your pretty little head about that." Aphrodite said with a smile.
"But-" Annabeth was caught off guard when Aphrodite rushed forward and firmly grasped her hands, "what are you doing?"
"Listen here Annabeth Chase," Aphrodite said as her hands-the very hands that held Annabeth's began to glow pink, "you're going to love Kronos and forget all about Percy Jackson. As soon as you leave here all you'll care about is Kronos. He's where your trust, your loyalty; your love will lie."
"But I think-I think I'm in love with Percy." She stuttered afraid of what Aphrodite was doing to her. She looked to her mother for help, but Athena was studiously avoiding her gaze. Her focus began to shift, she couldn't remember exactly what she was talking about seconds before, she knew it was important, it was like something on the tip of her tongue waiting for her to verbally release it. But the more she tried to remember the more she seemed to forget. She tried to remember what she was going to say, but she couldn't remember what so important to begin with, she knew she should be concerned by Aphrodite's glowing hands, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. She knew she should be weary of her mother's disturbed look but she couldn't for the life of her remember what she was so upset about. She knew she should be upset about all of this, whatever this was, it didn't feel right, but the longer Aphrodite held her hands the more it felt alright.
"Where is everybody?" She blurted out. She didn't think that was the important thing that she had suddenly forgot, but it seemed to be as good a place as any to start.
"Dang Athena," Aphrodite whistled her eyes never leaving Annabeth's. Her grip like iron on the girl's hands, "you didn't tell me your daughter ignored her heart. Although I guess for a Child of Athena the head is more important. This is taking much longer than I had anticipated."
Annabeth didn't know what she was talking about, and she didn't care. She started to feel dizzy and she felt the sudden urge to be somewhere else, with someone. Who? She didn't know-no that's not right, she couldn't remember. She started to shake her head to clear it as she swayed on her feet.
Aphrodite's grip tightened, "Annabeth," she said gaining the girl's attention once more, "How do you feel?"
"I-I don't know." She shook her head again, "I…I shouldn't be here, but I don't know where I'm supposed to be. I feel like I should be with someone but," she closed her eyes and focused.
Where was she supposed to be? On a boat! Yes, a boat. That felt right, but who was she supposed to be with. Then she saw him, in her mind's eye. His blond hair fell over his face in a way that made Annabeth want to brush it back so she could see his eyes. His dazzling blue eyes. Those eyes that held nothing but love and warmth. She wanted to be cradled in those arms. Those arms that did nothing but protect her all those years she was on her own before Camp Half Blood. She saw Luke, but he was different. His body seemed stiff and his eyes, once a warm deep blue were now a blinding gold. They were anything but warm, they looked as cold and hard as ice.
"He looks like Luke," She whispered without opening her eyes, "but different." She opened her eyes to see Aphrodite watching her closely and her mother trying to hide her tear filled yes. "That doesn't make sense, though. I mean I like Luke, but I never liked him like I feel like I do…now." She stopped talking when she realized whatever she was trying to say didn't make much sense.
"That's because you don't love Luke," Aphrodite said, her grip almost crushing Annabeth's bones, the once pink light was now a bright white, "remember? You love Kronos."
Annabeth ripped her hands from Aphrodite's grasp and snapped her fingers. "That's right," She said with a smile that Aphrodite returned. "I can't believe I forgot his name. How ditzy of me."
"That's quite alright, I'm glad you remembered." Aphrodite gently.
"But what am I doing here?" She asked confused. She didn't know why but ever fiber in her being was screaming at her to leave. That being here in the House of the Gods was wrong.
"You hit your head," Aphrodite said softly gesturing to Athena, "We were just making sure you were alright."
"Thanks…I guess." Annabeth thought something about this was wrong. Aphrodite wasn't a healer and neither was her mother.
"Aphrodite," Athena said tightly, "Annabeth isn't an idiot. She knows you're not Apollo, you don't heal people."
"Oh, silly me," Aphrodite said with a laugh. "You had a spell of amnesia. I was just making sure your heart was alright. At Annabel's confused look she elaborated, "Your symbolic heart. You know Goddess of Love and all that."
"Oh." Annabeth said quietly. "Oh!" She said when she realized what Aphrodite was saying, she rushed forward and embraced the goddess in an aggressive hug. "Well thank you. I feel much better now that that's all cleared up. I was confused for a while." She smiled weakly, "Thanks for your help."
"Not at all dear, my pleasure." Aphrodite said giving her an awkward pat.
Annabeth stepped out of the hug and looked around. She felt like she shouldn't be here, it took everything she had to ignore the primal need deep inside her to bolt from this place and never look back.
"Can I leave now?" She asked looking around for any sign that she should stay or leave.
"Do you want to?" Athena asked.
"I don't know." She answered honestly. "I feel like I shouldn't be here. Like by being here I'm betraying someone, but who could I possibly be hurting by being here…"
"You can leave if you want." Athena said sadly.
"I know what you need," Aphrodite said linking arms with Annabeth and leading her to the elevator, "directions to the boat."
"The boat?" Annabeth asked confused, "Oh yeah, the boat. Of course." She chuckled, "Must have hit my head pretty hard."
"Must have." Aphrodite mumbled.
Annabeth suddenly came to a halt before the elevator. Her face was drained of color as she turned to the Goddess of Love and asked, "Did I say anything?" At her confused look she elaborated, "When I was up here with a hurt head. Did I say anything about…" she gestured in a circular motion between the goddess and herself hoping the other woman would understand the question.
"About Kronos?" When Annabeth nodded in answer she continued, "No of course not. Your heart would never betray you, even when you head does."
That answer confused Annabeth, but she didn't have time to dwell on Aphrodite's weird riddles. All that mattered was that she didn't betray Kronos and now she desperately needed to get back to him.
"Okay. Thanks for fixing my heart or whatever." Annabeth said as she stepped into the elevator.
"Not a problem," Aphrodite answered as the doors closed, "Remember what I said."
Annabeth didn't even respond as the doors shut on Olympus and she headed back to Earth. She was confused by Aphrodite's words and behavior, but she hoped she never would have to set foot in Olympus again. It represented everything she was against, she had to help Kronos overthrow the gods. It didn't matter that they were nice to her and healed her when she was injured, they hurt him. They locked him in the deep abyss of Tartarus and she would be damned if she let it happen to him again. But something about this whole thing didn't feel right. Annabeth shrugged as she exited the Empire State Building Aphrodite's words ringing in her ears, "Your heart would never betray you, even when your head does." She wasn't quite sure what that meant, but she would guess it meant something about trusting your heart. And right now hers was leading her to the Princess Andromeda and Kronos.