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A/N: A little Willow/Spike piece. Her thoughts after Spike died in the final battle. Just put Spike in Kennedy's place. But he still wore the amulet and Xander was Willow's anchor to this plane. No Spuffy existed in season 7, either. Season 5 of Angel is the same except Spike's primary concern is Willow's safety, not Buffy's. Angel is Spike's sire and there's no animosity.
*****
When I feel lost, alone and scared, it's scares me that you're always there. I'm not scared that you're there to save me. No, that's not it at all. What scares me is that one of these days I'm going to need saving and you're not going to be there. Then what will I do? You're my love. My life. My soul. You're the only thing that keeps me anchored to this world. You're the only person that doesn't let me lose control of the magic that is deep inside of me. You're the only one that lets me be me. What happens now that you're gone?
You saved the world, but now you're gone. I'll never have you here to save me again. I don't know what I'm going to do with out you. You're going to be so hard to give up. Every one keeps telling me to move on. To forget you. Don't they realize that it's not that easy?
Buffy got to moan over losing Angel for months while he was Angelus, and then even longer after she killed him. No one said a word. But when Oz left me, I was supposed to be better in less than a month. How is that fair? Now I lose Spike, the love of my life. He's only been gone two weeks and everyone's telling me to get over him. Every one but Angel. But I guess he'd understand. I mean as much as Angel and Spike hated each other, Spike was still Angel's childe. Angel still loved him. Still does, I think.
Angel calls me everyday to see how I'm doing, and I'm not even sure. All I know is instead of things getting easier each day they get harder. I wonder of they'll ever get easier.
The phone rings. I pick it up. I answer happily like nothing's wrong. Like I don't feel like dying every time I breathe. The line's silent, but I can hear breathing. "Hello?" I asked again. Just as I'm about to hang up, I hear a voice I never thought I'd hear again, Spike's. He's alive. Well, he's actually a ghosty, as he calls it, and he's in LA. And he wants me to come to him. I can't think. Can't talk. All I can do is repeat over and over in my head, "He's back. He didn't leave you. He's back. He didn't leave you."
*****
A/N: A little Willow/Spike piece. Her thoughts after Spike died in the final battle. Just put Spike in Kennedy's place. But he still wore the amulet and Xander was Willow's anchor to this plane. No Spuffy existed in season 7, either. Season 5 of Angel is the same except Spike's primary concern is Willow's safety, not Buffy's. Angel is Spike's sire and there's no animosity.
*****
When I feel lost, alone and scared, it's scares me that you're always there. I'm not scared that you're there to save me. No, that's not it at all. What scares me is that one of these days I'm going to need saving and you're not going to be there. Then what will I do? You're my love. My life. My soul. You're the only thing that keeps me anchored to this world. You're the only person that doesn't let me lose control of the magic that is deep inside of me. You're the only one that lets me be me. What happens now that you're gone?
You saved the world, but now you're gone. I'll never have you here to save me again. I don't know what I'm going to do with out you. You're going to be so hard to give up. Every one keeps telling me to move on. To forget you. Don't they realize that it's not that easy?
Buffy got to moan over losing Angel for months while he was Angelus, and then even longer after she killed him. No one said a word. But when Oz left me, I was supposed to be better in less than a month. How is that fair? Now I lose Spike, the love of my life. He's only been gone two weeks and everyone's telling me to get over him. Every one but Angel. But I guess he'd understand. I mean as much as Angel and Spike hated each other, Spike was still Angel's childe. Angel still loved him. Still does, I think.
Angel calls me everyday to see how I'm doing, and I'm not even sure. All I know is instead of things getting easier each day they get harder. I wonder of they'll ever get easier.
The phone rings. I pick it up. I answer happily like nothing's wrong. Like I don't feel like dying every time I breathe. The line's silent, but I can hear breathing. "Hello?" I asked again. Just as I'm about to hang up, I hear a voice I never thought I'd hear again, Spike's. He's alive. Well, he's actually a ghosty, as he calls it, and he's in LA. And he wants me to come to him. I can't think. Can't talk. All I can do is repeat over and over in my head, "He's back. He didn't leave you. He's back. He didn't leave you."
*****