"It takes courage to enjoy
The hardcore and gentle
Big time sensuality…."
-Big Time Sensuality by Bjork

It had taken Kyo for ever to feel comfortable with kissing Tohru.

Not that he didn't want to (he did) and that he wasn't quite attracted to her (he was). It was…a bit more complicated than that.

The first kiss had come so easily. It was to help her understand how sincere he was, so that she wouldn't be scared of him, or misunderstand him. And, it had been wonderful.

But ever since then, he had a hard time kissing her. It was stupid; they were seeing each other, and spent so much time together but….

She was just so damn innocent. And, he liked that innocence, her complete wonder of the world around her. He didn't want to take that from her, and it seemed, in his mind, that kissing and the like would remove her innocence.

Eventually, it grew easier; kissing her, that is. Kyo kept moving slowly with her, and Tohru didn't seem to mind. He just couldn't bring himself to reach levels with her that he was ready for.

Two years passed, and immediately after graduation, Kyo moved into his own apartment, and then Tohru joined him soon afterwards. Kyo hadn't felt comfortable leaving her in the care of Shigure, and had managed to convince her to live with him. This posed a new problem: where would Tohru sleep?

Strangely enough, it was Tohru who voiced the idea of sharing a bed. Kyo had considered it (when hadn't he?) but hadn't shared this idea, worried that she might feel as though he was pressuring her.

Really; once he had started dating Tohru, he'd begun to worry more.

The first few nights had gone without much happening; sure, they'd spoon, and cuddle, and kiss, but nothing beyond that. But then, one night, something different happened. Kyo wasn't sure what had made this night so different, but once they'd begun cuddling and kissing, he hadn't wanted to stop (not that he ever really did); no, it was more that he couldn't bring himself to stop. And, it didn't exactly seem like Tohru wanted him to stop….

Things quickly grew heated. Kyo, at some point, lost his shirt, and when Tohru's nightgown was pulled off, he was sure he was going to lose it. She- oh god, she wasn't wearing a bra underneath. But, Kyo didn't have time for a small panic attack, for Tohru had immediately latched her mouth onto his again, pressing herself fully against him.

Needless to say, Kyo wasn't very upset about this. He broke the kiss, to look down at her, to try and read her. Was she…ready for this? Or was she just going along because she though he wanted to. There was no question in his mind what the next move was; they were quickly on their way to "taking it to the next level," from the places his hands were traveling, and the way she was letting him. But, how could he do it? Well, how wasn't the hard question; how was easy. He knew how (or at least, he had a general, basic idea). The question was, could he?

Could he really do this…with Tohru?

Could he really go all the way?

What if he hurt her? What if she didn't want to?

What if he had -ahem- problems?

Could he really do this?

Tohru shifted underneath him, obviously uncomfortable under his stare. Quickly, to avoid talking, he bent his head low and kissed her, a harsh, rushed kiss, anything to buy himself more time.

It seemed too late to stop now; he was half naked and she- well, she was a tad more than half naked.

But, what if she regretted it?

"Kyo-kun?"

He immediately stopped kissing her; she was about to tell him that they were going to far, and that was okay. He'd stop, he'd tell her that it was just fine, that they didn't have to-

"Kyo-kun, are you okay?"

Why on earth would she ask that? Of course he was okay; he was just fine! He just became overly cautious around Tohru at times, that was all.

"What- of course, yeah I'm fine, I just- do you- are you…? We don't have to- if you don't- I mean…."

He was babbling like an idiot. Christ, couldn't he even ask her a simple question?

And then, Tohru smiled- she smiled. Why was she smiling? Was she trying to make him feel like he was crazy?

"It's okay, Kyo-kun." She was still smiling.

And, upon reflection several hours later, Kyo realized that had been all he'd needed to hear.

End

NOTE: While I understand that many of you might've been looking to read a lemon here, and are probably hoping that I'll update with another chapter that will contain a lemon, I will not be doing that. I do not write lemons, no matter what. So please, do not request that I add a lemon to this story; any such requests will be ignored.

I hope you enjoyed this.

Please leave constructive criticisms.