AN: This is based off a conversation me and my sister actually had. More at the end because I don't want to give stuff away, but this 'mystery' was bugging us a lot and this conversation actually happened more or less. The rest is just ridiculous, plotless fluff.
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Some of the greatest mysteries of the world aren't very large, or even particularly important. Indeed, it's the simple questions that keep us up at night. Just small, stupid queries that buzz around our heads and makes us question the world we live in. Mostly they are ones like where the missing socks in the dryer go, why a pen writes smoothly until you need it to work, or what exactly the function of a rubber duck is. Blaine Anderson, never one for tradition, was pondering a completely different question.
He was standing in Kurt's living room, staring at the couch like it had done him wrong. Kurt had just left to get them popcorn in preparation for their movie (Iron Man, but *only* after much begging and because he'd promised to watch 27 Dresses later). Kurt's parents were both around, so unfortunately the movie would have to be the extent of things, but Blaine would never turn down cuddling with Kurt. It was the cuddling part that had gotten him thinking in the first place.
"What are you doing? I though you were going to start the movie?" Kurt asked as he walked back in, popcorn in hand.
"I will, I was just thinking about something," Blaine said, still wearing a very thoughtful expression as he stared at the couch.
"Is it the secret of the universe?"
"What?" Blaine asked, finally looking at Kurt.
"By your expression, I'd say you were pondering the secret of the universe," Kurt teased.
"No, this is just something stupid," He waved off, finally going over to put in the DVD. He came back over and yet again stared at the couch.
"Are you going to tell me?" Kurt asked pointedly.
"You're going to laugh at me."
"No, I won't." Blaine sighed.
"I just…. How do we both fit on there?" He asked, gesturing to the couch. Kurt only gave him a puzzled look. "I mean when we're laying down. That couch is tiny, how do we both fit? Does it magically expand or something? I just don't get it. There isn't enough room for the both of us," He exclaimed with and exasperated sigh. Kurt blanched at him for a moment before bursting out laughing. "You promised you wouldn't laugh," Blaine groaned, though he was smiling.
"I'm sorry, it's just, this is what you were thinking about? Your big mystery?" Blaine was right though, there really didn't seem to be enough room for two grown boys to lay down fully, side by side, on it. The cushions couldn't be two feet deep; and while Blaine was admittedly tiny, Kurt was solidly built. Just looking at it, it seemed highly improbable that they could both fit.
"Yes, it is, okay. It doesn't make any sense. We've done it before, so it's possible but how?" The advertisements on the movie were still rolling, but Blaine payed them no mind, because this was very distressing and important- do not laugh! Kurt took a few deep breaths to get over his giggle fit and looked at Blaine very seriously.
"Well, I guess the only way we'll be able to figure out how we manage it is to try," He said coyly, taking Blaine's hand and tugging him near the damned impossible couch.
"That might work," Blaine said, trying to hold back a smile. Kurt laid down first, half leaning against the back cushions, then pulled Blaine down so they were nearly spooning. Soon Kurt's bottom arm was slipped around Blaine's tiny waist, their hands clasped there. Blaine's head was tucked beneath his boyfriend's chin. His other hand drew lazy shapes into Blaine's shoulder. It took a few minutes but soon they were both situated and Blaine was no longer afraid of falling off.
"So that's how we did it," Blaine mumbled, and Kurt smiled into his hair. They were both so supremely comfortable that it took them a while to realize the movie was stuck on the menu. Kurt groaned. There was the very delicate operation of trying to grab the remote from the end table over his head (because they had finally gotten comfortable, there was no way he was moving now), as well as the popcorn, which was even more tricky, because he had to be careful not to spill it. He managed it though, and they started the movie.
It wasn't long before Kurt's arm started to go numb and Blaine began to get fidgety, so they had to shift around to find comfortable positions again, this time with Blaine's head on Kurt's chest. This was better for both of them, even if it was a little harder for Blaine to see the TV, but hearing the sound Kurt's heart right in his ear, he found he didn't mind.
A while later the movie had finished, and Kurt was about to bug Blaine to get up and change it when he glanced down and saw his boyfriend was asleep. He smiled and wrapped his arms a little tighter around him. He'd absolutely be making him watch 27 Dresses later, but he figured that solving one of the small mysteries of the world was enough for an afternoon.
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My sister and her boyfriend -no small guy- are always laying on the couch and it's tiny (I measured it and it was less than two feet deep), I legit didn't understand how they do it. So naturally we stood working out the logistics for fifteen minutes. And once we'd established that it was indeed possible, I just stopped and thought, this would make an adorable drabble. Thank you for reading.