Disclaimer: We do not own Pokémon. We do own the original characters and the story line.
Written by: Akai Shi-Koret
AN: Neither of these characters has appeared in the main RP yet but their personalities are pretty much true to form. This is NOT canon. This is sheer crack. There's no way that Ren would ever consider hooking up with Sten in ANY universe. I don't write maleXmale fics so if this sucks then I'm sorry. This was inspired by the scene from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann where Leeron tries to convince Kamina to sleep with him.
Dedicated to: Kenocka, for the lulz.
The Hook wasn't the most upscale bar in Bytharceos. It was located in a dark alleyway, light filtering dimly through the grimy windows and leaking through the various holes that years of decay and bar fights had left in its walls. It was owned by an ancient Sandslash and his daughter, who had kept the beer flowing and the bar more or less clean since before anyone cared to remember. The clientele was mostly of the seedy underbelly of the city, the riffraff, scum and losers that fell through the cracks. Fights were common in the bar, but seldom resulted in anything more than a broken nose owing to the fact that nobody wanted the proprietor to kick them out for good. A small band typically occupied one corner of the joint, playing on secondhand instrument and making the bar feel slightly more fancy than usual, which wasn't saying much.
All in all, Renzen had yet to find a better place to unwind.
He sat at the bar, perched atop a spindly stool that looked as though it could barely hold his weight as he aimlessly fingered his beer bottle. Despite his reputation as a hunter allowing him to visit more classy establishments, the Krookodile always came back to the Hook night after night to soothe his tensions with liberal amounts of alcohol. He enjoyed the ambience here far more than in other bars, enjoyed the earthiness of the place and the simple down-to-earth nature of the other customers. So long as they didn't bother him, he didn't bother them - an unspoken rule that had been in place ever since his first visit where he'd had to break the arm of a man who'd been stupid enough to try and start a fight.
Despite all of this, Renzen found himself to be rather disconsolate on this night. He'd been mulling over the strange, empty feeling for the better part of an hour now, helped along by several drinks, but had yet to figure out why. He sighed deeply, leaning forward on the bar while staring into space.
"Hello there," a sultry voice said from somewhere behind him, smooth as velvet. "Do I know you?" Renzen turned slowly, glancing over his glasses at the newcomer.
"I highly doubt you do," he said shortly while giving the man a once-over. He was clearly a Cacturne, with long black hair and spikes of greenish-black tint running through his skin. His eyes were unreadable, but glittered in the dim light as they took in Renzen's face. Renzen for his part couldn't guess why he was here. 'It's not like I've been trying to be social here.'
His lips curled up in a small smile at the hunter's words. "Oh come now, I must have heard of you from somewhere. Do you come here often?"
Renzen debated lying for a second before shrugging his shoulders. "Often enough," he said, deciding that it was a sufficiently mixed answer. "Look, do you need something?" He always got slightly irritated when someone interrupted his brooding sessions.
The newcomer shrugged as well, the smile growing slightly wider at Renzen's obvious consternation. "Well yes, but let's talk about you," he said, taking a seat next to Renzen and gesturing to the bartender with a flourish. "A name would be useful, hmm?"
"Renzen," the hunter replied shortly. He wasn't going to bother asking for the man's name, though given his personality thus far -
"Sten," his conversational partner said with a broad smile. "I'd tell you my full name, but that would take far too long and you'd never get the hang of it." He was distracted momentarily by the arrival of the bartender, who placed a pair of beers in front of him. "Now, what did you say you did for a living again?" he asked, sliding one of the bottles over to Renzen.
"I didn't," the hunter replied, eyeing the beer suspiciously. "What's this?" he asked, giving the Cacturne a quizzical look.
Sten laughed, a low, velvety sound. "I just thought I should buy you a drink, seeing as yours is almost empty," he said. "It's not like I have anything better to spend the money on. Don't worry about it." Renzen eyed it dubiously, causing Sten to laugh again. "It's not going to hurt you, go ahead," the Cacturne replied. "I don't think I've ever met a man as paranoid as yourself."
"There's a reason for that," Renzen replied, taking a swig of the liquid. Something was off about this whole conversation. He had a sneaking suspicious that his new "friend" wasn't interested in him just for the conversation. "So then, why don't you help me out by telling me why you're still talking to me?" He gazed at Sten intensely, not-so-subtly hinting that he was done with this intrigue.
Sten glanced back with feigned affront in his eyes. "Do you suspect me of having ulterior motives?" he asked innocently. "I promise you, my only purpose here is to share my company with a fellow bar-goer. Besides, a loner like yourself clearly needed someone to talk to." His eyes glittered mischievously at the words. "We can go elsewhere if you're uncomfortable talking here," he suggested, false innocence still lingering in his words.
In a flash, it became clear to Renzen. He managed to keep from blushing, but just by the merest of margins. As it was, he inhaled a bit of his drink, causing him to cough loudly. "I'll have you know, I'm not interested in... your type," he said delicately when his fit of hacking was over.
Sten pretended to look hurt this time. "But all I've done is try to help," he said in an injured tone. "Besides," he said softly, so as to keep others from hearing, "you never know. It might feel good, to be with someone on those long, cold nights."
Renzen glared back. "I'm straight. End of story." He knocked back the bottle again, trying to finish his drink and get out. This was getting out of hand.
"So are noodles, until they get hot," Sten said in his velvety low voice, a single finger lightly stroking the back of Renzen's hand. "How do you know until you've tried it?"
"Trust me, I know," the hunter responded, whipping his hand up from its resting place on the bar and stowing it deep in his jacket pocket. "Thanks for the beer, but I'll be going now." He stood, tossing an extra few coins on the bar as a tip and walking swiftly for the door. He barged through the wooden portal, turning and moving down the streets for the flat above his office. 'What a mess,' he thought to himself. 'It's ironic, really. The only one who'll have me is a gay guy.' The thought did not cheer him in the slightest and he shook his head, focusing on the things he could control. 'Guess I'll need to find another bar from now on.'
"Just this once," Sten's voice came from behind Renzen, a single hand softly falling on his shoulder. "Please?"
Renzen whipped around, mentally cursing. 'Why the hell is he following me?' "Are you that desperate?" he asked angrily. "Why are you so into me?"
Sten stepped closer, his voice floating across the distance like puffs of tobacco smoke. "Because I see something in you that I see in myself as well - we're loners. We have no connections to anyone or anything. All our lives we struggle by, going through the routines of life with no one to watch and with no one who cares. Life itself is a machine that way. And I can tell," he said, looking into Renzen's eyes, "that you hate it. Why not take a chance with a stranger? Why not give yourself an opportunity to be human again, to feel for the first time in what must be a long time?"
Renzen stood motionless for several long seconds, meeting Sten's gaze unblinkingly. When he did respond, it was one simple word: "Fine."
Sten smiled again then, the soft smirk sliding onto his face naturally. "Excellent," he said. "Shall we?"
Characters by order of appearance:
Renzen Krok, the Krookodile Essendran - Akai Shi-Koret
Sten, the Cacturne Essendran - Akai Shi-Koret (created by Kenocka)