A/N: This story will be pretty dark at times. There will be mentions of self harming, abuse, and possibly rape at some point. This story will develop into a Hermione/Bellatrix pairing. Don't like, don't read. Constructive criticism is always welcome. This is my first fanfiction, so everything is welcome. Any Beta offers will be considered.
A/N2: I figured I'd lost some of you on that last one. The rest of the chapters will be much longer. This is only the prologue.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. The wonderful realm of Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling a.k.a. the best woman on earth!
I stared out at the gently rolling countryside as the rocking of the train beneath me began to lull me into a dimmer state of self awareness. I still heard the sounds of my two best friends laughing amongst themselves, but it didn't penetrate the bubble I had formed around myself. Neither Harry nor Ron had realized that I was slipping down the slope into depression, my mind spiraling ever further as that sat mere feet away. I did not move, simply staring out of the window beside my seat as the world outside it slowly darkened. The sky was reflecting my mood and my thoughts. The longer I was left alone to stew in my thoughts, the tighter my depression's tendrils wrapped themselves abut the core of my being. Absentmindedly, the thumb of my left hand began to trace the criss-crossing pattern of delicate, pink scars. They twisted, crossed, and intertwined from my wrist to my elbow. When I was unable to make more, feeling the unevenness of the skin there held me over until the next time I could.
With a screech, the great train stopped in the magical village of Hogsmeade. Numbly I got up to go along with the others. I could not help but to study each face in the crowd wondering what was going on inside their heads. Why they felt whatever it was they were feeling. Was anyone else being slowly devoured by an emptiness that never got full? Did anyone else know what it felt like to have their insides scooped out and replaced with a poison that was slowly corroding them from within? No, I didn't think there was anyone there who felt quite the way I did
"Hermione, you coming?" Harry's voice broke me out of my silent musings. I looked up to find he and Ron were already several yards ahead of me on the winding path leading to the carriages that would take us to Hogwarts castle. The carriages were somehow enchanted to power their own way up to the castle. But, wait, the carriages were harnessed to something. I sped up upon the sight. Upon reaching the carriages, I could see that each was connected by a black leather harness to a sort of skeletal horse creature whose hide blended right in with the harness. Panicked, my eyes flickered past, looking for anyone who also seemed to be seeing these creatures. I couldn't have been imagining them, could I? The dark rot inside me had not yet reached my brain, had it? Something about these creatures tickled the back of my mind. I knew the information, but it was too much of a struggle to try to get it out. I could hear the beast in me chuckling at my struggle. It always did enjoy my pain. As this thought crossed my mind, my thumb began to trace my arm again. At this movement, the beast howled with mirth.
"Are you okay? You look ill," Ron said, as tactful as ever. When my eyes focused again, they came to rest on the door of the carriage where I could see that the boys had already climbed in. I couldn't believe I'd spaced out again.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking about all the interesting new stuff we'll be learning this year. I hear fifth year is when Professor McGonagall will teach us the theory of Merlin's third experimental transfigurative method," I said, off the top of my head, making up everything as I went along. Luckily, I knew the boys well enough to know that they had tuned me out early on in that sentence. I forced the best smile I could manage onto my face and climbed my way into the carriage. As I gazed out the window at the horse creatures, I vowed to spend time doing research in the library. No matter what it took, I was going to find out what these creatures were. In the process, I would prove to myself I was not, in fact, crazy. Or was I?
A/N 3: All further Chapters will be longer.