AN: Just some light hearted silliness that I decided to through together under the disguise of a Valentines Special. I hope you enjoy ^_^
It was Valentines day, and Naruto had a cunning plan up his, pristinely rolled, orange sleeve.
Of course, he was a little disappointed that he couldn't think of anything a little more original for his latest prank, but desperate times do indeed call for desperate measures. And – seems Naruto had forgotten about Valentines Day completely, until, just yesterday, when he had spied his sensei buying roses from Ino's flower shop – this was one of those times.
And so, as usual, his victim would be his nemesis, Sasuke Uchiha.
He had always been envious of Sasuke's gaggle of fan girls – who bought the Uchiha mountains of heart shaped chocolates every time that winged fairy was in town – so this year, he was going to get his revenge on his rival.
And so, under this mind set, Naruto had concocted his latest scheme. He would infiltrate the enemy lines – e.g. climb through the open window – and ensnare the red eyed monster within it's slumber cave – e.g. wait till Sasuke had fallen asleep and then tie him up with some rope whilst he was unconscious. A brilliant plan if he said so himself, which he did on regular occasions.
He knew that if he shared his inspirational plot with anyone, they where sure to steal it and claim it as their own – either that or they would mock him for using an already tried (and failed) plan.
But, to those who doubted him, he would say this: "The plan can't possibly fail this time, for I have a fall hardy way of avoiding that which caused my failure last time. How you ask? I shall be sure to avoid any out-of-date milk for the next two days at least! Yes sir! The only thing that will be passing through these perfectly sculpted lips, will be the finest ramen!"
And so, evil scheme in place and with a toothy grin sculpted into his face, Naruto made his way to the offending Uchiha's house, under cover of darkness.
It was around 12pm by the time he reached the small, one bedroom abode of the black haired shinobi.
Placing his back against the cold, white walls, Naruto shuffled around the house until he found the shutter that the Uchiha had so foolishly left ajar. No light seeped through the small crack, betraying the fact that the blonde haired boy's comrade/ mortal enemy was laying defenceless inside.
An evil grin spread across the boys childish features, as he checked his surroundings for any villagers who may have been stumbling home, drunk from their gluttonous sakee drinking. The coast was, indeed, clear.
Naruto grasped the wooden shutter firmly, and pulled it off of it's hinges without a sound. Though this fact was rendered insignificant, as he gave a loud woop of joy at his success. Apparently he had forgotten about the second, surely most important factor of "breaking and entering".
As he clambered through the window frame, the boy took in his sinister surroundings. The bleached white walls seemed to be giving out an ominous glow as they reflected the dim moonlight.
He lowered himself carefully to the cold, laminated wood flooring, fearing that there may have been a trap left for intruders such as himself.
He gave out a smug chuckle of victory, as he found that his foolish rival had neglected to protect him self from the genius that was Naruto Uzamaki.
The stocky blonde began to creep through the Uchiha's apartment, searching for the said creature's lair.
It didn't take long for him to reach his destination.
Pulling a length of supple rope from his ninja pack, Naruto advanced into the darkened cavern where his victim was currently slumbering. As he approached the slumbering beast, Naruto tightened his grip on the rope.
He crouched ready to pounce.
Slinging the rope,like a lasso, towards the Uchiha, Naruto held on for dear life as the bronco was raised from his slumber, and began to thrash about. Of course his efforts where futile, as the rope had landed perfectly, constricting his arms and legs.
Naruto laughed heartily at his thrashing rival. The phrase, fish out of water, was surely created to describe a scene like this.
"Damn you Naruto!" He cursed, eyes flashing red dangerously. "You're going to regret this!"
The blonde responded in the most infuriating way he could think of, by laughing in Sasuke's face.
He chuckled uncontrollably for perhaps ten minutes, as his raven haired prisoner looked on, with an ill natured scowl that distorted his, usually handsome, features.
Regaining control of his mirth, Naruto picked up Sasuke unceremoniously and shoved him into the Uchiha's own shoe closet.
The smiling child then scored the area for any sharp objects that the Uchiha could use to set himself free. There would be no mistakes this time. Naruto would make sure of that.
Naruto chose to stay in the Uchiha's house for the remaining hours before sun rise, in order to catch the early morning fan girls, who would, undoubtedly, be waiting to pounce as soon as Sasuke walked out of his door.
And so, as the golden sun began to rise on that Valentines mourning, Naruto henged into a replica of his mortal enemy, and began his search for an early mourning cup of instant ramen.
On finding his treasure, he took the precaution of checking the "Use By" date. He was in luck. 28th of February.
Pouring in the steaming water, Naruto began to stir the noodles vigorously with his favourite pair of chop sticks – which he kept with him at all times for similar opportunity as this, where free food was available.
He shovelled down his breakfast, taking no notice of the liquid that sloshed over the edge of the pot and on to Sasuke's, previously pristine, Uchiha Clan rug.
After discarding the empty pot, carelessly on the floor, Naruto strode over to the mirror in order to admire his handy work. The face of his onyx eyed rival stared back at him with an expression of uncontrollable delight, making Naruto roll around on the, cold, wooden floor in hysterics. It was apparently hilarious to behold this alien expression on the Uchiha's usually expressionless face.
After perhaps ten minutes of relentless giggling fits, Naruto eventually got a hold of himself and – pulling on his ninja sandals – pushed open the wooden door that stood between him and his next 24 hours of mayhem.
As soon as he stepped through the threshold, he was ambushed by several of Sasuke's most devoted fan girls. He flashed them with a flawless smile, that sent the majority swooning to the floor in quick succession, like human dominoes.
A blonde girl, who had survived the unprecedented act of acknowledgement from the hansom teen gave him a flirtatious wink.
"Happy Valentines Day Sasuke kun!" a second, brunette, gushed happily, whilst thrusting a box of expensive chocolates into the impersonators welcoming arms.
Naruto grinned his best, toothy grin at her and kissed her on the cheek. This was apparently too much for her to handle, and she fell to the floor amongst her fan girl peers.
Naruto sprang over the girls who had fallen victim to his charm, and began to unwrap a heart shaped, strawberry cream.
"Sasuke kun!" Called a familiar voice.
Naruto whirled round enthusiastically to greet his long time crush, Harino Sakura.
OOO
Meanwhile, the subject of the imposters exploitation, remained inside his cramped shoe closet with a face like thunder.
"Curse you Naruto!" He shouted at least once a minute as he wrestled with the securely fastened rope.
He would find a way to get his revenge. He swore it.
Suddenly remembering the spare Kunai that he kept stored inside of his sock at all times – having had the orange clad ninja as a team mate for over a year now, Sasuke knew it was foolish to be unprepared – he swivelled round on his stomach and caught the handle in his mouth.
A smug grin reached his lips at his victory as he began to cut himself free.
Naruto will learn his lesson this time. Thought the raven haired shinobi as he strode casually out of is shoe closet, as if this where a perfectly normal situation. Of course with friends like Naruto, being tied up inside a shoe closet was a rather mild punishment.
OOO
Oblivious to his plan's impending doom, the perfectly disguised Naruto skipped along the dusty Konoha streets in perfect mirth.
Although Sasuke's fan girls did think it strange that the Uchiha appeared to be in such high spirits, they did not complain when he extended his joy further by placing a kiss on their cheeks when he received their gifts.
This plan could not have gone more smoothly, thought the boy, as he fantasised over the growing stash of strawberry creams that where currently forming an edible mountain in the middle of his apartment.
His joyous fantasies where interrupted however, when a blood curdling image came into view.
As if looking into a mirror, the boy found himself staring in horror at a replica of his ordinary, blonde self.
The cloned Naruto was giving his identical twin a cunning and rather threatening smile.
"Hello... Sasuke." It greeted knowingly.
Naruto's heart began to beat at a thousand miles an hour. His first thought was, a rather illiterate, Shit. His second thought was, How the hell did he get out? His third was possibly the most terrifying of all, What if he takes my chocolates?
The Blonde had clearly forgotten that the chocolates where meant for Sasuke in the first place, but that was besides the point.
Naruto had won them with his cunning plan! There was no way he was going to give up his prize so easily!
With that mind set, he sped off like a blue and white rocket towards his apartment. He was so distracted that he didn't notice the pink haired girl calling to him.
OOO
Sakura sat on the, cold, stone bench with a forlorn expression on her pouting lips.
Why did Sasuke Kun run away from me. She thought. Her voice was winy even within her own head. He kissed all of the other girls. Why not me?
Maybe he was too shy. She thought, naively. She was of course the most beautiful and kind girl within the academy, and his only female team mate. This must surely qualify her to be his soul mate. Right?
Wrong. She finally concluded to herself. It was time to get a grip on reality. Sasuke would never accept a large fore-headed girl like herself. In fact she was beginning to question his very sexuality, seems as all those beautiful girls continued to throw themselves at his feet and he remained uninterested.
She knew for a fact that Naruto wouldn't pass up on such an opportunity.
Naruto.
It was strange that she always ended up thinking about Naruto after Sasuke had disappointed her once again.
Naruto.
It was only now that she realised thinking about the childish, fun loving shinobi always put a genuine smile on her face.
Naruto.
Just then she heard the good natured laugh of the very subject of her musing.
"Hey Naruto." She greeted, surprisingly more sincere than she usually was when greeting the whiskered boy.
"Hi Sakura. Chan" he added as an after thought, making the blossom haired Kunoichi smile. She did find his behaviour a little odd though.
Why where his hands in his pockets? And never mind that! Why hadn't he proclaimed his undying love for her yet, and begged her to go on a date with him?
Maybe he has grown up a little. She thought, now feeling a new found good nature towards the toothy grinned boy.
He smiled at her, in a way that looked a little alien on his whiskered features.
"Are you OK Naruto?" Sakura asked carefully. "You seem a little..." she paused, trying to find the right word.
"Different?" he finished for her.
"Yes." This answer seemed to humour the boy greatly. He certainly was acting strangely today.
Naruto then sat beside her on the bench, but kept a reasonable distance away from her, instead of invading her personal space like he normally would have.
He is surprisingly considerate today, and quite. Almost brooding. She thought warmly. She liked this new Naruto. She didn't know why, but something about him reminded her of her long-time crush.
She shook her head mentally. No. She would not think about him now. He obviously didn't feel the same way about her, and she didn't think that should could take any more of the constant rejection.
No. Instead she would focus on this strangely behaving Naruto.
It seemed that he had grown up quite allot in the space of a few hours. She thought this odd but did not wish to look into the situation further.
Resolving that she refused to spend another Valentines day alone she smiled over to Naruto in her best, seductive fashion.
"Hey, Naruto?" She asked.
"Huuuum" he replied, again rather uncharacteristically, but she was too involved in her plan to consider this fact further.
"You wanna go and get some Ramen?" she asked, surprised at how timid she felt asking this boy out. It was obvious that he wouldn't turn her down. Right ?
She found herself becoming more and more concerned when he continued to sit in silence, as if waiting for something. As she grew more uncomfortable, she started to ramble.
"With it being Valentines Day and all, I thought maybe we could grab some food, go for a romantic stroll, eat chocolates, watch a film latter..." Her rambling continued for several minutes until the blonde took her, completely by surprise.
She had blinked for a split second, before opening her eyes in shock.
The boy had crashed his lips, forcefully and hungrily into hers. She smiled a little before closing her eyes and leaning into him happily. She had no idea that Naruto could be so compulsive and... Well... Thrilling.
OOO
Having checked up on his chocolate box mountain, Naruto had begun racing around the streets, searching for the man whom he had unwillingly traded personalities with for the day.
But on reaching his destination, he wished that he hadn't bothered.
He stood in horror as he watch himself kiss the girl of his dreams.
And she was kissing him back!
Unable to take any more of it, Naruto called out angrily.
"What the hell are you doing?" He demanded, pointing a furious finger between his crush, and the replica of himself.
Sakura looked up in shock as she stared at whom she thought was Sasuke. The utter bewilderment that she felt, was clear on her Petit features.
Why was Sasuke acting like Naruto?
And, come to think of it, isn't Naruto acting a lot like Sasuke today? She contemplated whilst looking between her comrades.
As she thought this, her vision was impaired by two puffs of white smoke.
As the mist cleared, she found that her comrades had switched places. Naruto stood, pointing a threatening finger towards Sasuke who was now sitting next to her, returning Naruto's gesture with a mildly amused smirk.
Realisation dawned on her like a breath of fresh air. And that's when she realised it. She had just kissed Sasuke!
The pink haired girl's squeal of delight could be heard all over Konoha as she discovered her success.
She quickly dove back into Sasuke's arms and leaned in for another kiss.
Although Naruto was distraught at the fact that Sasuke had stolen Sakura's first kiss, he couldn't help but laugh at the horror displayed by his rival.
It seemed that Sasuke's counter of Naruto's perfect plan had some unprecedented flaws.
AN: I don't really like the ending but I kind of enjoyed writing this. Also I would like to say that I am in no way, shape or form, a Sasuke fan and I do not support the Sasuke x Sakura Pairing. It is my strong opinion that Sasuke is a bitch and that he must be punished as regularly as possible. Lol
Anyways, sorry if parts get confusing. It was confusing, even for me, when I was writing it! 0_O
Well I hope you liked it! Please review and let me know what you think. I would be happy to receive any constructive criticisms that you may have too ^_^
P.s. If you like this kind of random, light hearted stupidity, you will probably like my Konoha's Christmas Party story. Please check it out if you have time.
Thanx,
Lotrcrazygirl
