The bus rocked to one side as they rounded a corner near the outskirts of the Meadowlands in the northern-most part of Zootopia. Wolford and Delgato were vibrantly cracking jokes about last-year's trip a few seats in front of her. To her side, Higgins and Pennington were politely exchanging small talk about family life with kids and schools and whatnot. Towards the front sat Nick, who had the rapt attention of four other officers explaining a very embarrassing story about how her first case led her to questioning mammals in the 'Secret Palms Oasis' naturalist club. The officers surrounding him threw their heads back in laughter as he described the way Judy recoiled at the sight of an elephant instructing a yoga class.
Laugh it up, fuzzball, she thought. She could not contain the wicked smile on her face as she peered at her partner from a few rows back with firey determination. He went too far on his last practical joke, and now was about to experience bunny-flavored vengeance.
Most of his pranks were simple tricks. For example, he once slipped his unfilled paperwork into her to-do pile on her desk without her noticing so she spent most of the day completing it for both of them unwittingly. Another time, he called a 10-19 over his radio just to get her to help him move some furniture in his apartment. Of course she covered for him, since she was his senior officer and she would receive the blame if other officers found out he called in a prank robbery. But his most recent stunt called for retribution.
While he was still in training at the police academy, Nick heard how Judy earned herself the nick name 'Fluff-Butt' from the instructor. After more than a year of shaking that name off her reputation, Nick found a way to cement it in the precinct for all of time. One day, he covered the bottom of her chair with cotton balls and slathered them with blue glue so they would blend in to the seat. The bottom of the cotton balls were still bright white though, and she did not even notice them when she sat down. Her seat felt a little odd, but she was none the wiser to Nick's plans.
"*Officer Hopps to the front desk!*" she heard a voice call out over the PA system. The voice sounded strange, but urgent. Without hesitating, she flew from her seat and sprinted down the stairs towards the main hall where Clauhauser's desk was. The main hall was packed with officers exchanging shifts, some coming and others leaving. She whirled around to the front desk skidding to a halt as she looked up to Clawhauser, who was hiding behind his claws in shame.
"Pffffpffpf," she heard someone cackle from her side. She found Nick, with one paw over his mouth trying his darndest not to explode in laughter. His other paw was holding the precinct PA microphone.
"Nick! What's the big idea calling me down here like that, I thought someone was hurt!" she scolded him. Nick continued to suppress his laughter as he raised the microphone again and called out in the same voice.
"Paging officer 'Fluff-Butt'," he said in a mocking voice. She leered at him, about to give him a mouthful for using her old nickname, when she noticed the sound of suppressed laughter coming from behind her. She turned to find Wolford, McHorn, and a handful of other officers smiling at her or holding up paws to their mouths to contain snickers.
"Wha?" she murmured and looked around. She then noticed something odd and fluffy attached to her belt. She turned her head and peered down over her back, finding her entire rear end was plastered with white cotton balls, effectively making her look like a half-sheep.
Snap, she heard from Nick and looked at him in mortified shock. He held his phone up and savored the glorious photo of her looking confusingly at her own butt. Her face lit up bright red, as did her ears. She immediately scurried back to her desk to begin picking the fluff-balls off of her pants, just as whoever was in the front hall at the time began crying with laughter.
The chief saw the whole thing, of course. He did not take too kindly to pranks being performed out in the open at the expense of officers in uniform. Nick got parking duty for a month and 3 months probation, which made the whole matter look settled in the eyes of the precinct.
But settled the matter was not. To embarrass her when it was just the two of them was one thing, but to display it like that for many officers present demanded justice. She spent months thinking about how to do it. She considered shaving his tail so he'd look like a giant rat, but she heard horror stories of fur not growing back properly after pranks like that. She thought about blackmailing him into singing 'Careless Whisker' in front of everyone at roll-call, but that would get her in the same kind of trouble Nick got in since he'd be in uniform. But after much thought, she came up with a plan and this was the night it would all come crashing down.
"Hey, is that it?" she heard Nick call out, snapping her out of her vengeful reminiscence.
The bus came around another corner and she saw through the trees a large riverbed that lined the cliffside. It looked a bit like a campground with barbecues and tables set up near the stone wall that lined the river. There was a volley-ball court set up on the sand, and a series of chairs facing a small wooden stage that was carved into the cliff-face.
Highland Point. It was the northernmost part of Zootopia, where the river split in two and surrounded the rest of the city on either side. The annual ZPD Highland Point retreat wasn't much of a retreat, more like an extra long party, though the chief insisted it was a 'precinct morale event' and not a party. Whichever it was, it allowed the day-shift officers of Precinct 1 the opportunity to take an afternoon off together enjoying some much needed bonding time. Highland Point was chosen not for any particular symbolic importance, but rather because it was far away enough to keep the officers from embarrassing the force.
"See that stage?" Wolford said and pointed out the window as they approached the lot. "We had a Guns n' Rodents tribute band play for us last year. Great drinkin' music."
"That's nothing," Fangmeyer cut in, drawing the attention of Nick's audience. "I heard this year they booked a stripper." A few male's widened their eyes while Pennington rolled her eyes with a loud scoff.
"Don't be absurd, Richard," she scolded him.
"Hey, don't doubt my sources Francine," he defended himself with a smile and a paw to his chest.
"Unless it's your cousin from Gazelle's back-up squad, I'm not interested," she shot back, which got an eruption of laughter from the entire bus.
They pulled into the lot and began disembarking, carrying bags and coolers full of "non-alcoholic" beer along with them. McHorn and Fangmeyer began unloading equipment while Wolford and Delgato led a group to the climbing spot, which was an area of the cliff-face that lined the water suitable for rock-climbing. If anyone fell, they simply fell into the water, and if they got to the top they'd jump off. Judy kept her eyes on Nick, who was waiting for her by benches.
"Hey fluff," he said under the shade of his aviators.
"Hey slick. You wanna team up against the hyena twins at volley-ball?" she offered.
"As much as police training has done for my athletic ability, I'd rather spend my time off soakin' up the sun," he said and motioned to the blow-up chaise by the water.
"Suit yourself, I'll see if they'll trade off one-on-one," she said and let her partner go. Deep down, she wanted to see him enjoy himself. She wanted him to have fun, smile, and make a few memories. He wouldn't be able to forget tonight for as long as he lived. For now, all she had to do was bide her time.
The next few hours were genuinely a good time. She played a little volley-ball against the twins with Grizzoli on her team. Delgato and Wolford had their fill of cliff-jumping and we're 'serenading' McHorn with a small guitar, who looked ready to pop. Higgins cooked some salmon teriyaki on the grill while Francine began rounding folks up for food.
As the sun began to finally set and all of her fellow officers began to chat, eat, and drink, Judy kept her eyes on Nick's whereabouts more and more closely. For her plan to work, she had to steal him away at just the right time. She wasn't about to drop the ball on a few months of planning.
"I think the show will be starting in a few minutes!" officer Fangmeyer called out to a crowd. Slowly animals began to make their way to the stage area.
Now or never.
"Hey Nick," Nick heard someone hiss from behind him. He turned to find Judy ushering him closer, looking uncharacteristically shifty.
"What's up, Carrots?" he said leaning over to get closer.
"I just saw Grizzoli and Anderson in the trees back there!" she said and motioned towards the woods behind her, seemingly a little panicked.
"And? This is a police retreat, police officers are everywhere," he said flatly.
"No no no! They were kissing," she said with wide eyes.
"What? No way," he said in honest disbelief.
"I mean it! I'm freaking out! I don't want to break the rules, but I don't want to report them to Animal Resources either," she said and looked in both directions to make sure she wasn't being heard.
"There's no way, Carrots. Show me where you saw them," motioning towards the woods.
"What? No!" she said, but was too late. He started creeping towards the spot in the woods she mentioned and listened carefully for movement or any sign of the two bears. He kept his head low as he ducked from one tree to the next. He saw his partner follow closely behind, spitting all sorts of curses at him.
"Nick!" she hissed. "You better not want a picture of them!"
Ah, she knows me too well, he thought. He did whip his phone out and held it at the ready, in case his partner's crazy story was true. His interest was peaked since a photo of that could become useful leverage if he needed it. It wasn't like he wanted to embarrass his co-workers, but he made his living for most of his life by knowing things before other mammals did, and this kind of info was too good to let go.
A murmur of voices caught his attention, and he turned to the left and followed them up the hill that led to the cliff side. Perhaps they wanted a lovely view of the river to smooch by? His partner continued to whisper madly at him as she trailed behind him. Eventually he found himself near the top of the cliffside and hid behind a few trees, with a few large mammals close by. He could hear them breathing. Just a quick peek, and that would be all he needed.
"Gottim'!" he heard someone shout, just as a large paw wrapped itself around Nick's unwitting neck. He gasped as he was thrown forward, landing with an 'oomf' leaving his chest near the edge of the cliff. He could hear the faint sound of folks gathering at the stage not far from where they were. He rubbed his neck and stood up, ready to face his attacker.
"McHorn?" he asked in shock as he stood up to find the rhino looking angrily at him. "Who tied your horn in a knot!" he angrily spat. Nick's eyes widened as two more figures emerged from the trees. Officer Fangmeyer stood on one side of McHorn with his arms crossed leering at Nick. Officer Delgato stood on the other side, effectively closing Nick in from any direction except behind, where the cliff led into the water. Nick's eyes were wide open and darting nervously from each of the officers in front of him. He held his paws up, nervously trying to calm his co-workers obvious anger.
"Okay, fellas, let's all keep cool here. No one wants to hurt anybody, right guys? We're all friends here?" he said and backed up just a little as they advanced. "I'm not sure what's going on here, but there's no need to make things ugly. I'm a reasonable guy! We can work something out, right?"
He was laying it on thick, in his best salesman tone. For a moment, he thought it worked because they stopped their advance. But their confident smiles did little to calm his nerves.
"Slick Nick, always trying to talk your way out of a sticky situation," he heard from the woods behind them.
"Carrots?" he said and dropped his paws. Judy emerged from behind McHorn and smiled wickedly at him, walking towards him like she owned the rocks she stepped on.
"Sorry Slick, but you're not talking your way out of this one," she said and approached him closer. He froze with his paws up, in a certain amount of fear for his life with the way his partner was looking at him.
"You remember your little 'fluff-butt' stunt?" she said with a thumb to her chin.
"Is that what this is about? Carrots, I spent a month on the meters for that!"
"And did I ever hear an apology?" she said with a fierce frown.
"I'm almost positive I did, but if that is what you would like, then Officer Judy Hopps I am very very sorry for embarrassing you," he said without the slightest hint of sarcasm.
"Hmmm. You put up a convincing hustle, but I'm not buying it," she said and reached into her back pocket.
"Come on, Carrots! This is nothing to get violent about. And what are you guys helping her for?" he asked the other three wildly shaking his paws. Judy fished out a carrot pen from her pocket and held it high above her head. With a flick of her thumb, Nick's voice rang out from the device in her paw.
". . . Did you see McHorny try his paw with that rhino lady? That guy gets a date when I grow a second tail," his voice rang out from the pen. He shot a terrified glance at McHorn with his mouth glued shut. McHorn snorted steam out of his nostrils and glared at him.
Judy gleefully pressed the fast-forward button and flicked the play button again. Nick's voice rang out a second time from her pen.
" . . . So then I told Fangmeyer the patrol was mandatory for any officer short of their ticket quota. He needed a cruiser so I leant him mine, so my car's on the record for being on patrol that day and I still saw the whole concert," his voice chimed in again. Nick's eyes darted to the tiger with his arms folded over his chest.
"Ok, ok, I see the-" he started and Judy silenced him.
"Ah ah ah!" she said with a wag of her finger. "You're forgetting about Delgato." Her finger clicked down on the button again and out rang his voice, sealing his doom.
". . . Delgato? The guy would be a great cop if he would just look away from his reflection for five minutes. I swear he takes closer care of his mane than he would his own child," the pen finished and Judy gave it a satisfying click before throwing it back in her pocket.
"Oh, come on! That was like a month ago!" he said with a frantic expression. "Alright guys, I pulled some fast ones on you, I admit it, and I shouldn't bad mouth my coworkers behind their backs, but are you really going to push me off a cliff?!"
"What? No, Nick we're not pushing you off a cliff, we just needed your attention," Fangmeyer said rolling his eyes.
"My attention!? What's wrong with a conference call?" Nick pleaded.
"Nick," Judy started and closed the distance between them. She stood close enough to whisper in his ear, which unsettled him greatly. "You've been quite the prankster since you joined the force. Now, we all love a good joke, but you've gotten way too comfortable playing games with the ZPD. You know what we do to rookies who think they can get away with anything?"
Nick swallowed. "What?"
"Hm," she laughed and turned on her heel. She began walking back into the woods and down towards camp with a satisfied grin on her face. "The boys will explain," she called back.
Nick nervously looked from either side as the three larger mammals closed in on him. Delgato was holding a large canvas bag. McHorn held a rope in one hand. Fangmeyer kept his paws up ready to grab Nick if he dared make a run for it. They each held a satisfied grin on their faces that sent chills down Nick's spine. He barely had enough time to choke a cry for help before they were all over him.
"Hopps! There you are," Clawhauser said with a wave. "They're gonna start the show in a minute."
Judy literally hopped with excitement as she joined her co-workers in a tight group around the small wooden platform lined by a large rock wall. She found a seat front and center with her shoulder-bag ready to go. She was nearly vibrating with excitement as the headlamps from the bus turned on and lit the stage nice and bright. The small set of speakers they brought with them were playing a Beagles tune when Officer Wolford stepped onstage. There was a round of cheers and applause and a few raised beers as the timberwolf slipped on stage and winked at a few of his coworkers. He brought out a crowd-control megaphone up to his muzzle and hollered out over his adoring crowd.
"Alright alright!" he called out over the cheers. "How're the good mammals of precinct one doing tonight?" This was met with a round of further cheers and hollers from the crowd. Judy gleefully clapped along as they all voiced their enthusiasm.
"Let's have a round of applause for Pennington and Higgins for that gorgeous food, eh?" he said, gesturing to the elephant and Hippo who stood near the back of the crowd. They were met with whistles and hollers as most mammals turned to show their appreciation. Higgins smiled and gave a little salute, while Francine lightly blushed and gave Grizzoli a playful shove.
"You make good fish for a herbivore, brother," Wolford complimented. "Now, we've all had dinner, so it naturally follows that we get a show, right? Well, we've got a treat for you tonight. A once-in-a-lifetime performance, put together by our very own Officer Hopps!" he said.
It was Judy's turn to blush as the crowd applauded her. She waved off her co-workers and gave Wolford a knowing wink. He winked back and stepped towards the music player by the side of the stage and hit play. Clawhauser immediately recognized the song as one of Gazelle's previous but memorable hits. He gasped as he looked down to Judy, who's attention focused on stage. As the trumpets began to play in the intro of the song, Wolford gestured to the stage again.
"Bring'er down boys!" he called up. Above the stage, at the top of the rock wall, McHorn, Fangmeyer, and Delgato each held tight a rope in their paws. They began lowering down towards the stage a large canvas bag decorated with a large red-silk bow. The bag was lopsided and shifting wildly as whatever was inside tried to find its way out. Wolford waved the three of them off as the bag came to a short distance above the stage, where it swung suspended like a giant misshapen christmas gift.
"For your entertainment, ladies and gentlemammals, we present you . . . Gazelle!" Wolford said and gave the bow at the top of the bag a hard tug.
Judy had to hand it to Wolford for being a great performer. He timed the bag opening with the music picking up perfectly. Just as Gazelle's voice began to loudly sing about her hips, Nick's flailing figure stumbled out of the bag and hit the stage with a plop. He rose and looked out over the crowd, shielding his eyes from the harsh lights, before immediately shielding other parts of his body.
Nick Wilde, before most of his co-workers, was stark naked.
He curled his tail around his waist to cover his lower regions and his eyes darted around as he looked for something better to cover himself up with. The bag was pulled up and away from him and now he was all alone on stage with Gazelle's music playing. His three captors cheered and laughed hysterically at the sight below them.
The crowd went ballistic. Many mammals jumped from their seats and cheered. Others laughed and gave Nick a holler while clapping eagerly. Even Francine gave her trunk a loud toot and shouted Nick a few cat-calls. Judy took one look at his shocked and redder-than-the-sun face and gave her partner a sultry whistle.
"Ow Owww!" Wolford howled as Nick began to shuffle to one side. "Ah ah, Officer Foxy. You're not permitted to leave this stage until we see you dance."
"Carrots!" he cursed and scanned the audience for his partner. He found her standing right upfront whistling at him like a drunk sailor.
"Let's see you dance, Gazelle!" she hollered and swung her head back and forth with the music, bouncing playfully.
"I am not dancing in the nude!" he hissed at her towards the end of the stage.
"Fine," she said and reached into her shoulder-bag. She pulled out the contents and threw them on stage. Nick grabbed the items she through and lifted them up to inspect them, which also happened to reveal them to the audience as well. It was a bright pink pencil skirt and matching bra with gold sequined charms hanging from the hips. It was a cheep knock-off of the outfit Gazelle popularized on her last tour, and Judy made sure to get a set in Nick's size.
He looked down at her with pitiful, almost desperate eyes while the crowd egged him on. She stood there at the base of the crowd with her paws crossed and her eyebrow raised as if to say well? I'm waiting.Nick rolled his eyes and reluctantly began covering himself with the skirt and bra, knowing full well she would not be satisfied unless he wore the whole ensemble. At this point, it couldn't be helped. The music continued to play as he awkwardly stood before the crowd in a cheap Gazelle costume while the music blared. Phones were out in force recording the moment for all of posterity.
"You messed with the bunny, Wilde!" Wolford called out with the megaphone. "You never mess with the bunny!" The crowd cheered in agreement as Nick stood before his coworkers in drag. His face could have been mistaken for a stoplight, but his eyes were focused on his partner, who at long last seemed to be satisfied he got the message.
Are we good? he mouthed at her. She un-crossed her arms and gave him a slow nod, which ushered the slightest smile from his face. Judy smiled back and began clapping along with the crowd cheering him on.
Nick Wilde wasn't one to make a fool of himself lightly. Despite his hoodwinking and history of hustling, he always considered himself to be a fox of some dignity. He wore a neck tie most of his life, after all. But in a moment where he was forced to stand in front of a crowd nude, then in drag, with cameras capturing his every movement, he found the best way to move forward was to really sell it. If you can't beat'em, at least give them a good show. He waited for the music to count in, and did just that.
Nick raised both paws above his head and threw his face up in a genuine sultry smolder as he began to sway his hips back and forth, mouthing the words 'Hips don't lie' along with the song and swinging his tail in giant circles. The crowd exploded with cheers and hollers and even more whistling as Nick danced with the music to the best of his ability. Given the circumstances, Judy didn't think he danced that poorly at all. She gleefully cheered as well when Nick shook his shoulders in a devilish little shimmy. One officer even began throwing a few dollar bills onto the stage to complete the performance.
That was the night Nick earned himself the name 'Officer Foxy'. For years to come, he and Judy would be partners in very important and dangerous cases. They'd save lives and keep the city safe. The wayward citizens of Zootopia new them as Officer Hopps and Officer Wilde, but within the deepest darkest parts of the precinct, they were known as 'Fluff-butt and Foxy'.
A/N: Thanks so much to Cimar-WildeHopps for suggesting this idea for a story over at DeviantArt! If you care to make suggestions about my next story, feel free to watch me over there at .