Okay, so this is based off of the song Haunted by Taylor Swift.
Summary: Logan loves Kendall, but Kendall leaves him, and leaves him again, and leaves him again. Logan finds love in James, but nobody can replace Kendall. Nobody.
Ghost of You
I knew my relationship with you was fragile. We were a loving couple, but we always seemed to screw up. I knew I'd always love you, and I thought that the same was true for you. Apparently, I was wrong.
"Wha—Kendall, you…you're breaking up with me?" I was in tears. I could literally feel my heart tearing open, flooding my lungs and keeping me from breathing. I couldn't lose you. I just couldn't.
You sighed. "Logan, don't."
I felt myself break a little more. Your voice was hard, no sympathy. I looked into your eyes, and found the same result. The shining green orbs seemed icy, and it just made everything worse. I could feel myself start to break down, and you were just standing there, watching me with a cold stare. I couldn't help but feel like it was all a lie. Every kiss, every touch, every "I love you", lies.
I watched you walk away, and let myself slide down the wall, bringing my knees to my chest before breaking down and sobbing into them. The love of my life…left. I felt like a piece of my soul had left with you, and I hoped that it would haunt you until the day you died.
James found me in his room, eyes red, jeans stained, heart obviously broken. He made a mental note to knock some sense into Kendall later, but he needed to comfort his shattered friend now. He sat down next to me, and waited for the younger boy to acknowledge him.
Eventually, I turned my head towards him. I gave him a weak smile, appreciative that at least someone seemed to care about me. The thought made me break down again, and I was back to crying into my knees, James rubbing circles into my back.
Soon, James wrapped his arms around me. He kissed the top of my head and rubbed my arm, trying his best to comfort me.
Finally, I looked back up at James. "Thanks," I said.
He smiled. "Hey, no problem. If it was me, you'd do the same, right buddy?"
I nodded, and placed a short kiss on James' lips. I felt myself blushing as I realized what he had done. My blushed only deepened when James brought his lips back to mine, but I found myself returning the kiss. I needed comfort, and James definitely brought it. I closed my eyes, and imagined that you was the one kissing me, and suddenly I felt a little better.
"I'm quitting the band."
You were standing in front of Gustavo and Kelly, and we were sitting behind you. Nobody could speak. We were wide eyed, and Kelly was panicking, looking from you to Gustavo, waiting for something to happen.
Gustavo was expressionless, apparently deep in thought. Eventually, he looked up to you. "If you're no longer in the band, why are you still in my office?" His voice was calm, and this scared everybody more than when he yelled. You simply nodded and turned to leave.
"Kendall…"
Nobody needed to look to know that I was the one to speak, and that I was starting to cry again. You didn't even acknowledge me as you walked out of the door for the last time. I just stared blankly at the door. You didn't even say goodbye…
This brought Logan to today. He was dressed in a nice suit, per James' demand. He felt a tear fall down his cheek, and he was surprised. He thought he had cried himself dry when he first received the call from Minnesota. Kendall had left them to pursue his dream of becoming a professional hockey player. Unfortunately, the dream was cut short during a game where he was knocked into the boards constantly. He was rushed off of the ice with a very busted up head, and died at the hospital.
When Logan first heard, he cried for almost two days straight, until eventually the tears stopped falling. He and the boys were leaving the Palm Woods to attend his funeral, and, because of the memories, wouldn't be coming back. They said their final goodbyes to Hollywood before boarding a plane to Minnesota.
At the funeral home, the first thing Logan noticed was Kendall. No, he knew it wasn't really Kendall. Kendall was dead. That was just his body. He felt himself moving toward the casket, and realized that Carlos and James were dragging him to a seat. He was too weak to move, having never left his room since the day Kendall left, so he just let them drag him to the three seats next to Ms. Knight and Katie.
The funeral was a blur. He saw people he knew stand and he knew they gave eulogies, but he tuned them out, focusing on the lifeless form of the only one he thought he could ever love. He felt James sneak a hand into his, and slowly brought his hand away, not wanting to betray Kendall at his own funeral. Even if the boy had broken him, he still loved him. Nothing could ever change that, not even James.
Afterward, he saw people stand up to leave, but couldn't bring himself to do the same. He watched as everyone else left, and before he knew what was happening, he was walking toward the casket, looking down at what was once his best friend, his lover. He felt himself starting to cry again, and took a deep breath in an attempt to comfort him. He began to sing to himself, still needing comfort for all he had been through.
You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
But, I never thought I'd live to see it break
It's getting dark and its all too quiet
And I can't trust anything now
And it's coming over you like it's all a big mistake
Oh, holding my breath
Won't lose you again
Something's made your eyes go cold
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now
I'm haunted
Stood there and watched you walk away
From everything we had
But, I still mean every word I say to you
He will try to take away my pain
And he just might make me smile
But, the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead
Oh, holding my breath
Won't see you again
Something keeps me holding on to nothing
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now
I'm haunted
I know, I know
I just know
You're not gone
You can't be gone
No
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
Won't finish what you started
Come on, come on
Don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
I can't go back
I'm haunted
You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
Never ever thought I'd see it break
Never thought I'd see it
As he sang the last few lines, he broke down again. He slid down until his back was against the casket and just sat there, letting his eyes drain themselves. He heard footsteps approach, and felt when somebody sat down next to him, but he didn't look up. He just kept crying. He felt a hand on his back, rubbing small circles, and looked to find the face of his new boyfriend. "James, I–"
James shushed him, and continued to rub his back, watching as Logan relaxed, smiling weakly as he felt himself starting to regain control.
He stood up, James standing with him a moment later. He wrapped his arms around James' torso, and smiled when the taller boy did the same. They stood like this for a while, James keeping Logan from falling apart again. He knew that there would always be a part of Logan that held on to Kendall, but he hoped that the rest of Logan let him go, because he knew that that was the only way he would ever be happy again.
Logan found himself in his bed, staring at the ceiling, lost in his own thoughts. His eyes were heavy, but he couldn't bring himself to sleep. Not yet. He simply lied awake, staring at the glow in the dark stars that were scattered across his ceiling. He smiled, and eventually found himself succumbing into his fatigue, letting himself close his eyes and drift off to sleep.
Logan was sitting at his desk, trying to find the words to write. He was trying to send a letter to Kendall. He needed to tell the boy just how much everything had affected him. He brought the pen to the paper, and let his mind roam free, the words seeming to appear on the paper as soon as he thought them.
Dear Kendall,
I love you. I miss you. I have James now, but he's not you. He could never replace you. Nobody could ever replace you. I still can't get over the day you left. I replay it in my head all the time. How I fell apart and felt myself withering away. James kept me grounded for a time, but he couldn't keep me completely attached. Eventually, it became too much. I never left our room. I just lied in bed, crying my eyes out. I guess when you left, a ghost of you stayed behind, following me everywhere.
Haunting me.
Okay, that was just a short little thing that popped into my head thanks to Taylor Swift. Normally, I like happy endings, but I don't think it would make sense, since the song doesn't have one. And the switching between Logan's POV and Outside POV is a little awkward, but I like it. Hope you did too. Reviews gladly appreciated.
Oh, and I know that I haven't updated Love Hurts. I'm working on it. I seriously am having writer's block, and it sucks because I have to get the last chapter up today. So just bear with me on that, okay?