ahh, i hate karin. i hate her soooo much. so that's why i made this! to torture her ugly, ugly soul with lee forever. :DDD
i do not own naruto.
if i did,
lee would be fucking ruler of the world.
There comes a time in every man's life when he feels the need to settle down and get married, maybe have a few kids, have a great paying job. All of that is simple for a man to do, as long as he finds the right woman. For Lee, though, it's not so simple.
Here you have a tall, lanky but fit, bowl cut haired guy who is from top to bottom awkward in all ways, and his eyes are perfect circles all the way around. Not to mention his eyebrows have more hair than a girl who hasn't shaved in three years.
Yeah.
That's not very appealing, right?
Didn't think so.
Anyways, for some reason Lee suddenly decided he wanted to get married and find the perfect woman. It happened suddenly one day, out of nowhere.
There Lee was, skipping along in a field of daises, singing the ever famous song, 'Puff The Magic Dragon' when he spotted a young couple in the distance.
Skipping at hyper speed, he got closer to the couple and realized it was Sasuke and Sakura sitting on a bench. He watched as Sasuke rubbed the growing bump on Sakura's belly. Lee sighed, as a river of tears fell down his cheeks. He was supposed to be the one having a child with Sakura-chan…
Sasuke and his team had returned to Konoha four years ago, the following two years, Sasuke and Sakura had gotten married; they already have a little son. That killed Lee inside. But he was now determined to find someone almost as good as Sakura.
"I SHAL FIND SOMEONE WITH BEAUTY AND YOUUUUTTTTTHHHHH!" Lee grinned and skipped around in a circle," Youth. Youth. Youth. Youth. YOUUUTHHHHHHH!"
He chuckled deviously to himself as he ran at a prompt speed into town.
Lee looked around and spotted Hinata.
She's beautiful but she's not very youthful… OH WELL. I CAN CHANGE THAT.
He ran up to Hinata's side and grasped her hand tightly," Hinata-chan, will you please marry me, the sexiest beast in Konoha, in the most youthful of ways in the world? It doesn't matter if you are youthful, you can be married in to youth and have my youthful babies of youth!"
Hinata blushed nervously and tried to gently pull her hand away," U-Uhh…L-Lee-san…"
Lee's eyes sparkled brightly," Yes beautiful ray of sunshine?"
Then, he suddenly felt a fist being pounded into his head repeatedly.
"Get your fucking hands of my girlfriend!"
Lee looked up, which resulted in his face getting punched in, but for some reason, that didn't seem to faze him in the least bit, he let go of Hinata's hand and stared up at Kiba.
"We can't share this unyouthful but stunning young woman?"
Kiba growled and grabbed Lee by his green jumpsuit, pulling his face dangerously close to his, and talked through clenched teeth," Fuck off Lee, she's mine."
He sighed," All right. I'd rather not try to mess with your youth, you can deal with that shit on your own." Lee backed away from the couple and headed down the street, sighing to himself.
"YOSH. I NEED TO FIND SOMEONE YOUTHFUL!"
That's when Lee spotted Ino rearranging a display of flowers.
She's not all that beautiful… but she seems quite youthful with the way she's blabbing at Sai-kun's ear…
Ino chomped away at her gum, continuing to talk poor Sai's ear off.
He studied her for a few minutes and watched her body language. Lee then realized by her provocative way of dressing, and the way she was batting her lashes at Sai, she was a flirt.
Lee frowned heavily, his face turning an un healthy color of green.
" I HATE FLIRTY BITCHESSSSSSSSS!" He screamed into the air, which gathered the attention of all the men, women, and children in the area.
He growled loudly, getting extremely enraged.
Lee's eyes filled with fire and rage, his fist in the air," I WILL FIND THE PERFECT WIFE!"
He ran to women in the street, asking for their hands in marriage. Which resulted in either a mad beating from the woman's husband or boyfriend, or a smack in the face by said women.
Lee sat on the curb, his face covered with hand marks and bruises. Tears streaming in rivers down his cheeks yet again." I HAVE FAILLLLEDDDD ~~~!"
Lee sat there and sobbed in his own sorrows for three hours.
Three fucking hours.
Who the fuck does that?
It was beginning to get dark and Lee decided that his river of tears had to stop eventually. He stood up, his face blank, no sign that he was crying at all. Lee began walking slowly, in hopes that someone would spot him and ask him what his problem was. (Because Lee wanted to be the center of attention, ALL THE TIME.)
Lee stood up tall remembering what Gai-sensei has once told him.
"When you're sad from rejection, keep your head up and find a prostitute!"
He smirked in the creepiest way in the world and started on his search for the street walkers.