---- PROLOGUE ----

"Welcome… to Fight Club." All the men there, old and new, took a small, almost hesitant step back. A lithe man, well built and muscular, with a scar across his nose and a knowing smirk, jumped the last step into the underground basement. Skittering rats and dripping water went unnoticed as the man walked in front of the small group and slowly smiled.

"For those of you who are new, let me… hip you to the rules and names. My name is Iruka," The man newly introduced as Iruka gestured to another man still in the wings, "and this is my colleague, Kakashi." Kakashi jumped down, sticking to the shadows. A high, almost girly voice echoed from the corner.

"Rule one: Tell no one about fight club." Kakashi said, and walked out of the shadows. He was built similarly to Iruka, except maybe a bit brawnier. He had pre-mature silver hair and a scar over one eye. Oddly, the scarred eye's pupil was red. The rest of his face was discreetly covered with some sort of mask, giving him a mischievous look.

"Rule two: Tell no one about fight club." Iruka repeated, his smile growing into a grin, "Rule three: all newbie's have to fight. No exceptions."

"Rule four: you fight until one or both of you say stop. Then you stop, and next group goes in. Remember, you can leave at any time." Kakashi said, he was surprisingly quiet for such a tall man. "Now, who here is new?"

Two guys stepped forward, one with astonishingly gold hair and scars on his cheeks, the other with mousy brown locks and red tattoos adorning his.

"Kiba Inuzuka."

"Naruto Uzumaki."

Kakashi laughed, it sounded oddly like a giggle. "Welcome. Tell me, what are your real jobs?"

"I sell car insurance." Kiba offered, and Naruto hesitated, glancing at Iruka.

"I'm… I'm a teacher's aide." Iruka raised an eyebrow in recognition, but the silver haired man interrupted him before he could say anything.

"Well, then. Naruto, how 'bout you fight Sasuke, and Kiba, Shino. Who wants to go first?" Both guys shrugged and took a step forward. Kakashi laughed again.

"Now, now. You'll all get your turn. How about… Naruto goes first." Kakashi offered, and Naruto grinned.

"Sure!"

"Yo! Sasuke! Come on up here!" A tall guy with black hair and matching eyes stepped forward. He had the look of an emo at gym practice. Long, black, silky sweatpants hung low, but tight, on his hips, and he had a long, slim, black tank top on.

"Hn? Fighting another dead last?" he said, and smirked. Apparently the blonde didn't take to well to insults, and he stomped up to the raven.

"I'll whoop your ass, believe it!"

"Oh really? You can't even use proper grammar." Of course, there was bound to be a fight, but nobody expected Sasuke to initiate it.

The blonde staggered back, bleeding from the lip. With a muted scream of "Bastard!" he charged the raven, orange shorts and black t-shirt billowing behind him as he charged.

Iruka watched the proceedings with mild interest. Who'd of thought Naruto Uzumaki, teacher's aid, pretty boy, and self proclaimed Future-Principle of Konoha High, would join a club like this?

He shrugged a bit to himself. Everybody had their reasons.

The fight lasted a good deal longer than everyone thought, and when the fight finally ended, both boys came out bruised, bloodied, and victorious. Turned out, they both (grudgingly) ended up yelling stop at the same time.

When Kiba and Shino fought, it was relatively short, and although Kiba lost, they both came out with a grin.

After that, Kakashi fought Itachi, Sasuke's brother, and highly gay femme-phobe. Iruka almost laughed when he saw Itachi make a grab for his friend's pants and saw the poor silver haired guy almost hit a pole trying to dodge it.

The fighting went on well into the night, and when they finally stopped, everybody was injured to some extent, but oddly ecstatic.

That was the whole point of fight club. Guys fighting off their aggression so that they wouldn't end up becoming mass murderers and kill the whole city.

"Hey," Kakashi called to Iruka, "Wait up." Iruka complied, and soon they were walking down the street to Kakashi's house. It was quite a walk, but they went down it twice a day and were used to it.

Slowly, the bright edge of the city gave way to that part of town that is neither suburb nor downtown, where the dredges of society make their stead. Both men walked up the steps of an old, dilapidated mansion, and, after a short moment of jiggling the door open, walked inside.

The inside was as bad as the out, and Iruka took a moment to let his nose get used to the rancid air, and his eyes used to the dim light (which shouldn't be there, it was the middle of the night and no lights are on).

Looking pointedly away from the mold festering in the corners of the foyer, he made his way into the kitchen, dodging random porn magazines and film slides, where the phone was ringing.

He hesitated before answering, what was he going to say? 'Hello, this is Iruka. I live- well, technically I'm squatting- in a mansion on the lower west side, and I just happened to hear the phone ring on my way in from my fight club.'

Snorting softly, he answered the phone.

"Hello? This is Iruka."

"Good day. My name is Police Officer Temari, of the ninth precinct. I'm sorry about calling at this time, it must be late, but we have made an important discovery. Do you remember me?"

"Hai!"

"Good. We may have found who blew up your… condo, I believe it is?"

"That's wonderfu- somebody blew it up?"

"Yes, sir. It seems they used some sort of organic fire, possibly an explosive… tag? I'm sorry; there must be a typo on the paper… sir?"

"Did you just say explosive tags?"

"Yes, well, I'm sorry sir, there must be some sort of mistake, and I'll get a detective on it right away."

"Yeah… you… you do that, okay? And… and call me back."

"Will do, sir! Good day- err, night."

Iruka hung up the phone and collapsed into a chair in shock. Leaning over, he ran his hands over his face, trying to get his bearings.

His condo exploding was not an accident. Somebody had set it on purpose! But the only person who had anything that sounded remotely like exploding tags was-

Oh. My. God.

Kakashi blew up his condo. The man tried to kill him.

Iruka jerked up in his chair, frantically looking to the door. A person blocked the light in the doorway, casting his whole body into shadow.

"Kakashi…"

---End Prologue---

dun Dun DUN! eek! whats gonna happen to my Dolphy-chan! oh no...

soo... how do you like? should i go on? its based off the movie Fight Club, but its not really going to follow the movieline(?) so yeah...

..lol... hip you to the rules... thats like the worst line in the history of man...

man, I love gay Kakashi, but i couldn't resist making him run away from Itachi. (not that I would run, quite the opposite, XD)

ah, you gotta love evil kakashi and iruka... COMMENT!

oh yeah, tell me if you want pairings, and which ones... (crosses her fingers hoping you'll say half yaoi half het)