DISCLAIMER: I don't own Kurama or Hiei or Roto or Shiori or Yukina! If you do, you're lucky, and I thank you for letting me borrow them.
You Wouldn't Say Farewell?
Artificial light blared down from the fixture above the mirror, casting shadows under his eyes and illuminating his features harshly. His slender fingers traced the twin cuts on each cheek, the only of his numerous lacerations not concealed by his silken nightclothes. Though merely superficial, the wounds went deep. Rarely was he ever actually afraid during a battle, but he had been terrified then. Terrified enough that he had froze for several moments, an act that nearly cost him his life –and that of his kaasan.
Sighing, Kurama wipe the image from his thoughts and forced it into the darkest corner of his mind, burying it under layers of memories. Shiori was safe, and that was all that mattered. Roto's evil machinations had failed.
But, no matter how hard he tried, he could not expel his lingering fear.
He shut off the light and made his way into the darkened hotel room he shared with Hiei. The room was empty, however, and he found his despondent mood returning. He was hoping that Hiei would be able to help assuage his fears, particularly those that centered around the fire demon. Hiei's daring act had alarmed him more than he had allowed the others to know; neither he nor the koorime himself had ever expected him to use the Kokuryuha, let alone against an arrogant youkai like Zeru. It had injured Hiei more seriously than anyone knew –Kurama could see it in his eyes. He'd never seen Hiei in such pain, and he didn't like it.
The pool of moonlight glittering on the bed shifted, and Kurama turned his gaze over to the window. Hiei's black clad figure turned until he was facing the kitsune, blinking slowly as his crimson gaze flicked over Kurama's visible wounds.
"Gomen, Hiei. I didn't see you." He walked over to lean against the window ledge next to koorime and smiled as Hiei moved to make room. "How is your arm?"
"Hn," Hiei replied, gazing back out into the night after sparing a cursory glance at his charred forearm. "Daijoubu."
It was a lie, and Kurama knew it. Tension rippled through the fire demon like a raging river, his whole body taut with it. But, Kurama knew better than to press and so let the subject drop. "It's late." In fact, it was past midnight; the moon had already begun to sink toward the horizon. "Come to bed," he said quietly, stepping back and motioning toward the large bed they shared.
Hiei glanced at him from the corner of his eye but otherwise made no reply. Sighing once more, Kurama leaned over to brush his lips against the fire demon's cheek and murmured a soft goodnight before slipping into bed and drawing the blankets up against the night's chill.
His body relaxed almost instantly, but his mind refused to succumb to the heavy mantle of sleep. Despite all his experience, all his years of burglary and battle as a youko, he felt the slightest trepidation over the next battle. What if yesterday's events were repeated? More than one group was scheming against them, and it was quite possible that they would collaborate in order to arrange their defeat. What if the surviving members of team Rokuyuka told their next opponents of Roto's plot –and its near success?
The futon shifted under him and he turned in surprise as Hiei crawled in next to him. The koorime lay back, half-reclining against the headboard, and glared down at the kitsune. "You're only making yourself more nervous," he said; his eyes, the only feature not dulled by the darkness, glistened in the faint moonlight. "Yamero, fox."
Kurama opened his mouth to protest, then shut it and looked away. He knew his koibito was right, but still… "You would do the same if Yukina had been threatened," he murmured, drawing the blankets more securely around his shoulders.
He waited for Hiei to speak, and when several minutes went by in silence, Kurama looked up at the koorime again to see Hiei gazing down at him, features carefully guarded. "Nani?" he asked quietly.
"Would you really have let Roto kill you to save her?"
Frowning, Kurama sat up, wincing as his injured body protested. "H-hai," he replied, glancing askance at his koi. "Of course I would."
"Nande?" Hiei pressed.
His heart raced as the fear came coursing back, threatening to eradicate all the carefully garnered memories of his ningen life, but the redhead forced it down. "Because she is my mother. I have already caused her enough grief, and to put her life in danger yet another time…" Kurama shook his head. "After everything I did to save her, I don't think I would be able to accept her death now." He blinked, tears leaving warm trains down his cheeks. Ashamed of his tears but unable to stop their flow, Kurama turned away. He knew that Hiei would never chide him for his tears –indeed, Hiei was the only one he allowed to see those tears– but he often found himself envying his koibito's ability to dam everything up inside.
"You would have left me again for her."
Kurama started at Hiei's sudden allegation, wiping away his tears with the back of his hand and daring a glance back at the fire demon. "What do you mean?"
"You would have died for her sake without a second thought about me," the koorime said simply, no accusation evident in his voice.
The kitsune began to object and stopped. How could he say Hiei was wrong when he had been ready to do just that? Iie, it would not have been without second thoughts. I could never abandon you and not feel remorse. "Iie, Hiei, you're wrong. I would have died to save my mother, hai, but not without regret. I would never leave you voluntarily. Onegai, believe that."
"Demo, you would still leave," the fire demon said.
Helpless, Kurama met the koorime's cool gaze, searching for the words to reassure his koibito. "Hiei," he said at last. "I, you know I love you, demo…" He stumbled over the words, searching for a way to make Hiei understand; he knew a single misstep could drive Hiei away from him, but his usual eloquence had deserted him. He had to tread cautiously, for he'd learned long ago that Hiei was as timid as a rabbit in matters of the heart.
"I owe her my life," he began slowly. "Without her, I would have died the day that hunter injured me. I was careless, but she gave me a second chance at life. Safeguarding her happiness is the only honorable way to repay her." Kurama hoped Hiei understood his motives; honor was of paramount importance to the fire demon, and one of the few ningen concepts that wasn't alien to him.
When the koorime still looked skeptical, Kurama pressed further. "Wouldn't you do the same for Yukina?"
Hiei's stoic facade fell away as suspicion crept into his eyes. Kurama knew it was unfair to corner his koibito so, but he had to make the fire demon understand. "Wouldn't you?" he repeated.
"That's different," the koorime said finally, turning away but glancing sideways at him.
"Doushite?" Kurama asked. "Yukina is your sister. Shiori is my mother. It's-"
"You ningen mother," Hiei interjected. "You're a youko."
Kurama shook his head. They had had this conversation many times before, and he was loath to begin it again. "Only half of me is youko now. The other half is ningen, just as only half of you is koorime. Why is that different?" When the fire demon didn't respond, Kurama leaned forward until their noses almost touched. "Aishiteru, Hiei. Zutto. Had it been you Roto threatened, I would haven given up my life for you. Demo, I would regret leaving Shiori. You would regret leaving Yukina, as well. It's the same thing."
"Hn," Hiei snorted derisively. "You're assuming I would give up my life for you." Kurama blinked at him suspiciously, uncertain whether his words were in jest or not. Even after all this time, he wasn't always able to decipher the real meaning behind Hiei's caustic remarks. A hint of a smirk tugged at Hiei's mouth as he cocked his head. "Kitsune no baka."
Unsure whether he should be angry or relieved, Kurama glowered at the fire demon while he fought to regain his composure. Hiei saved him from replying by sidling closer and lying down on his side, injured arm cradled against his stomach. His former doubts gone –or at least pushed aside– Kurama encircled the koorime's waist with his arms and concentrated his youki on Hiei's right arm. He couldn't do much, but between the herbal poultice he had already given the fire demon and his limited healing powers, he hoped he could restore at least some mobility to the limb the Kokuryuha had claimed.
"How did you know about Roto's plans in the first place, Hiei?" he asked quietly after a while, resting his head on top of Hiei's.
The small fire demon remained motionless against him, and Kurama was afraid he had already fallen asleep. But Hiei shifted slightly, just enough that the kitsune could see the small smile playing on his koibito's features. "I read his mind. Weak minded fools such as him have no defense against my Jagan."
"You know that is illegal within the arena," he scolded, though he could not keep the grin from his face. He moved to brush his lips lightly against the fire demon's ear. "Arigato." But Hiei was already asleep.
A/N: If you can manage to drag yourself out of the sap, please review! And if you thought it was good, read my other Dark Tournament fic "Midnight Reassurances," set after Kurama's fight against Bakken. Please R&R!!! Arigato, minna-san!