Author's Notes: I don't own Hakushaku To Yousei. I'll be focusing more on the anime because I've stopped reading the manga no wait scratch that as of the moment I am reading the manga. But I don't if Mangafox has completed this. All I know is their status is ongoing.
Lydia Carlton sighed for the hundredth time. She couldn't concentrate on the book that she was reading about fairies and all. She looked at the moonstone ring on her left finger. After the events that happened she forgot to tell Edgar to take the ring off of her finger. Another sigh. But do I really want to take this off?
"Lydia! Lydia!" the voice of Nico, her cat friend exclaimed entering the library. She smiled, closing the book, her attention to the fluffy cat.
"Nanda yo Nico? Any good news?" Lydia said Nico was waving an envelope in her face.
"A party! Edgar-sama conducted another ball!" he heard his friend sigh. "Lydia daijoubou?"
"I don't know", the fairy doctor replied lamely. Lately she had been avoiding him for what reason she doesn't know. She doesn't want to risk another heart break again like she did when she was young. But the more Edgar Ashenbert goes near her, the more her heart beats unlike the normal beating. His words somehow make her heart sway but every time he does she always tends to push him away. And he even pushed through with their engagement. She groaned. There's no way for him to change his mind. One way or another and one of these days he'll wait for her reply. And what will I tell him? Leave me alone and let's stay friends?
"Lydia, Nico told me about the ball", her father said, interrupting her thoughts. "That's nice. I guess it's time for you to unwind".
"I am unwinding myself Otou-san. I love reading my books so yes I am contented thank you very much", she replied defensively as she went to the window and crossed her arms. Her father sighed.
"It's been a month since you last saw each other and since he visited here to ask me for your hand in marriage", her father continued. His daughter remained silent and added, "What's wrong Lydia?"
"Do you think he's serious about me Otou-san?" she asked back. Nico and her father looked at each other. "Or is he playing with my feelings so well so I would fall for him?"
"Lydia what are you talking about? I think the Earl is really in love with you", Nico replied, jumping at a sofa. "He's always worried about you. He thinks of you first among anyone else and if he is just faking it he could have got rid of you long ago. All of the women here are enchanted with him".
"Enchanted", she mimics her cat friend's word. "Yeah enchanted". Who wouldn't be enchanted with him? He's like one of those fairy tales that came to life. A prince in a flesh but an earl nonetheless.
"Lydia". She didn't even realize her father was already behind her, his two hands on her shoulder. "Do you have feelings for the earl?"
"O-Otou-san!" she had the grace to blush on what her father asks her. "What kind of question is that?"
"It's the same question I ask myself when I decided to be with your mother", her father replied. She stiffened.
"O-Okaa-san?"
"It was her decision to be with me. How about you Lydia what is your decision?" she was about to reply to her father when a knock came on the door.
"Pardon my intrusion, professor and Lydia-san", Raven said. "Milord tells me to pick you up Lydia-san. He said you don't need to concern yourself about your dress tonight. He apparently had bought one".
"Talk about Edgar-sama's nice timing", Nico said as he went down on the sofa. "Neh Raven I can come too right? I can wear gentleman's clothes?" Raven took the cat and held it firmly.
"Why of course Nico-san". Holding the cat near him his green eyes turned to Lydia. "Shall we go Lydia-san? Professor?"
"Well we can't keep the earl waiting". He lightly touched his daughter's shoulder and Lydia looked at him and smiled. "It's best if you tell him how you really feel". He walked ahead of her daughter as Lydia smiled wryly to herself.
/
"Lydia!" she had just apparently arrived in her room where Raven showed her where her dress was and in came Edgar Ashenbert, a smile on his face as always. "I'm so happy to see you! I missed you so much!"
"E-Edgar!" she was about to move away from him when his arms had encircled around her. Her cheeks were starting to get red. "E-Edgar we can talk later. The ball is about to start".
"The ball can wait", Edgar replied, holding her close. "I missed holding you like this". Memories of that night as he holds her close and thought they had made love came rushing back to her. Ermine. She apparently moved away, her eyes down cast, her back was turned to him. "L-Lydia?"
"A-After this let's not see each other anymore".
"W-What are you talking about Lydia? I already asked for your father's blessing and-"
"Break the engagement". Her voice was firm and she was doing her best not to cry at that very moment. "Please".
"Lydia, what's wrong? Tell me?" Edgar went near her as he slowly turned her towards him. He sighed. He had made her cry again. "Am I really breaking your heart?"
"Do you wanna know the truth?" she tried to talk to him in a calm way but her tears were in a way and her feelings were in turmoil. "Must you always break my heart for a hundred of reason? How do you expect me to love you when in fact…in fact…I knew that somehow you are in love with someone else…"
"Is this about the night when I was about to make love to you and saying another woman's name?" Edgar sighed. "I should have told Raven to tell me the names in alphabetical order then".
"You're in love with her. Why can't you see that? And all the things you told me maybe…maybe you've been dying to tell her that too…for a long time now. So please", Lydia turned her back again her hands in prayer position, suppressing her tears. "Let's end this here right now. I came here because I respect and accepted your invitation. After this…after this…forget about me…"she looked at the moonstone on her left finger. A single tear fell down to it. "I'm sorry".
"I don't want to part from you. I'll die if you do my fairy", Edgar said, his voice was in a whisper. "But I'll always wait for you until such a time you want to see me again…and perhaps be with me". Before he left and closed the door he added, "I'm sorry for my own foolishness to whisper another woman's name while I wanted to make passionate love with you. Believe me the scene replayed in my mind so many times and I just want to undo just that". When he closed the door finally all she could do is bury her face on the bed as the tears keep on falling.
Just when I thought I've fallen for you, you had to whisper another woman's name. It hurts more than being played a bet on while I was young. I hate you. I hate you so much that I don't know why I can't leave you.
She buried her teary face on the bed for quite some time before she decided to put on the dress and attend the party.
/
"Lydia?" she was wearing a maroon ball gown that had embroidered many flowers at the bottom of the gown. Her hair was kept and the same flower on her dress was being matched in her hair. Upon hearing her name she looked at the right side and saw Paul Ferman. She tried her best to do one simple thing: to smile.
"Paul-san looking as dashing as ever", Lydia began as Paul blushed lightly on her comment.
"You look beautiful as ever Lydia-san". He gazed at her face intently as his eyes softened. "Have you been crying?"
"N-Not really", she replied and looked down instead. "It's apparently nothing".
"If you like we can talk in the balcony", Paul suggested as she nodded. They started walking towards the balcony as Paul opened the doors. "I don't think it's just nothing you know. I'm sure you are thinking about something for you to shed some tears like that". He heard the fairy doctor sighed as she leaned on the railing.
"I'm afraid to fall in love Paul-san. I have a bad memory of it when I was young. Some guys had a bet on me and made fun of me. It was a traumatic childhood for me. Since then I knew that it would be so hard for to find someone who will accept me".
"I think his Honour accepts you very well. Aren't you his fiancée? And you among all people understand his lordship very well. I think you two are made for each other", her friend said. She smiled wryly to what Paul said. If only things were that easy.
"I think he's in love with someone else". Paul tilts his head.
"Who?"
"Ermine. Remember that woman that you encounter before? I think he is in love with her", she reasoned out briefly. "If you were in my place I think you'd feel the same way especially when it ends up that his lordship whispered her name…instead of mine…"
"L-Lydia-san…"Paul said, looking shock on what she said. He didn't want to ask anymore as he turned to her. "Lydia do you love him?" he heard sobs from her friend. Knowing this he already knows the answer to his question.
"I do Paul-san. I love him. He had successfully made me fall for him so hard but I just can't…I don't know if he loves me…or he just wants to love me to forget his feelings towards Ermine. I love him. Can he just love me without thinking anyone else? For once I wanna be selfish I wanna be with him". Her teary streak face turned to her friend as she added, "But I told him after today he has to break the engagement. I can't bear the thought of him saying her name again. I'd rather…I'd rather not be with him if that happens".
"Lydia…"he got a kerchief from his pocket as he began wiping her tears. "Be strong neh and just tell his lordship how you really feel. I'm sure he had been waiting for this moment for you to tell him of your feelings".
"I can't do that! No I can't! I'd rather die hiding these feelings…than…than…" Paul tapped her shoulder and smiled slowly.
"Believe me his Honour will reciprocate your feelings well because I know he feels the same way too". She bit her bottom lip deciding whether or not to tell him of his feelings. But what they didn't know was that Edgar had heard their conversation as he was looking for Lydia. Knowing the truth on who the mystery woman is he said that night he decided to go to his room later and drink in a stupor.
To be continued…