My name is Haku Yowane. I am an ordinary, humble, detective who works secretly outside of town with my (not so) perky assistant, Neru Akita.
Haku sighed as she looked at her door. Someone had vandalized her nameplate, again. The vandal had inserted a 'u' between the 'o' and 'w', written 'hi' over the 'a' and added an 'r' at the end, effectively changing 'Yowane' to 'You Whiner'. She got out a hankercheif and began scrubbing the marker off to the best of her ability. The result was less than satifactory, but it'll do for now, she decided.
She sat down at her desk and pulled out her current case file. Some pervert wanted to know the breast size of local celebrity, Miku Hatsune.
The mystery is solved. 'Miku's boo*s are b-cups.' She wrote. As she went to write more, she was interrupted by the sound of footsteps.
"Oh? Someone's coming." She said to herself.
Ah, the people who depend on me...
Two women walked in. One she recognized as a friend of Neru's, Rin Kagamine, the other, a pink haired woman she had never met.
"Detective Haku Yowane, I presume?" The Kagamine girl asked.
"You presume correctly. How may I help you?"
"Miss Yowane, I would like for you to investigate my brother, Len. I am worried he is cheating on his girlfriend." Rin said, handing her a photograph of a boy who looked a lot like her.
"Miss Yowane, I would like you to investigate the dissapearance of my pet cat." The pink haired woman said, handing Haku a photograph as well.
Requesting an infidelity investigation, or search for a pet cat...
"Miss...?"
"Megurine. Luka Megurine."
"Miss Megurine, you do know this is a picture of Miku Hatsune in a cat costume, right?"
"Oh, is it? I was almost certain this was my pet cat."
Casefile 31600 - The victim, Luka Megurine, doesn't seem to be 'all there'.
Haku sighed again, taking both photographs. "In the name of my grandfather, I shall solve these cases." She promised. "Leave your contact information on the back of these photos, and I shall contact you if I find anything out."
Once she was sure the clients were gone, she threw the papers behind her and flopped backwards into her chair.
Ah, someday, I will, bluntly, entirely, easily, in a sweep, resolve unsolved cases. I'll appear on the front page of the paper with a smile, yeah!