A/N October 7; Thank you so much to Bellum Gerere who will be reading through Smoking Embers and later the upcoming sequel who I'm now working on. I'll repost each chapter until the whole story is rewritten and have been proofread. Thank you so much to everyone for reading. Reviews are highly appreciated.

Disclaimer: I do not owe the Hunger Games.

Chapter 1 – Tomorrow Will Be Kinder

Black clouds are behind me, I now can see ahead
Often I wonder why I try hoping for an end
Sorrow weighs my shoulders down
And trouble haunts my mind
But I know the present will not last
And tomorrow will be kinder

The Secret Sisters, "Tomorrow Will Be Kinder"

I'm looking out over the settling sun, which is about to go down behind the treetops. Before, I would have been mesmerized by the shifting colors and growing shades stretching out over the forest below me. Now I only feel numb, like I do most of the time these days. My mother and Prim will start to worry if I don't show up soon, or maybe they are just glad I'm out doing something, not just sitting in a chair by the fire like the first few weeks.

A chill is spreading through the air and I can feel the cold creeping up on me. I know it's time to head back, and so I stumble to my feet. I've been sitting still for so long I've lost feeling in my legs. I jump up and down, trying to get the blood running again. Slowly the prickling feeling ebbs away. I pick up my game bag and throw it over my shoulder before I start to make my way back through the woods.

The bag is far too light. The two squirrels I have in it I shot only so that I'll have something to show after a whole day in the forest.

Maybe I'll go to the bakery to trade them for some bread. The baker has always had a weak spot for my squirrels, but I know I cannot do it. Who am I trying to fool? I haven't had the guts to see Peeta's family since I got home. I don't have it in me to look them in the eye, knowing I'm the reason that their son and brother are never coming back.

I have to quit thinking like this right now. I have to stop thinking about Peeta. I can't let my thoughts linger too long on the last part of the Games. Every thought concerning Peeta and the Games is, for the time being, banned from entering my head. I'm afraid of drowning in my own despair again if I do.

When I first came home, they let me be. "Poor girl, let her have some time to figure things out." I settled into a chair in front of the fire in our new home in the Victor's Village, and just sat there. Days became weeks, and I didn't show any signs of getting up.

Prim was with me as much as she could be. Most of the time she sat by my side. Often she tried to bring up harmless topics, about everyday life in the District, but I rarely answered. She made me food that I rarely ate, and she wrapped me in blankets at night.

Gale had started working in the mines, long hours six days a week. Still, he came by almost every day to check on me. Workdays he didn't stay long. He had a family of his own to go home to, after all. When he came, he would sit in the chair beside me. Every day he would reach out and take my hand in his. But he rarely talked. As the days went by, I could feel his restlessness and impatience with me increase. One day he couldn't hold back anymore.

"Katniss. Get a grip!" he shouted one day. I didn't even look up.

"You have to pull it together. You have to be strong, Katniss. I know you can. If not for you own sake, do it for your family. They need you. We all need you." His hands were digging into my shoulders, shaking me. It came as no surprise. Gale had a strong spirit. He couldn't hold back his feelings for long.

"Look at me, Katniss," he pleaded. I looked up, and for the first time since I came home, I stared someone straight in the eye. Gray meeting gray. His fiery and mine cold and empty. I started to cry. The fire went out of Gale, and he let his arms wrap around me before pulling me close. After the worst of the hysterics were over, he let go of me. He kissed the top of my head and left without a word. I'd never seen Gale lose his spirit like that before.

Gale didn't come the next day, or the day after that. I began to worry that he'd given up on me. It was the first thing that made me feel something. A painful stinging to my chest. But the third day he came back. He sat down, as he did before, and took my hand as he always did. After a short while, I leaned over and rested my head against his shoulder. We didn't say a word.

In the end, it was my mother who woke me from the haze I was in. About a week after Gale, she also lost her temper with me. It came as a surprise. I'd never seen her that angry before, except the time she yelled at my father for teaching me the hanging tree song.

"Katniss! You get a grip! You can't go on like this. The Games are over, Peeta is dead and the sooner you accept that and move on, the better." I flinched at her harsh word, but didn't answer, refusing to look at her.

She knelt down before me, and forced me to look her in the eyes. An intensity I rarely saw in my mother was dancing in her darkened eyes. I felt like I was four years old again, squirming under my mother's reprimanding stare after I'd done something wrong.

"Do you remember what you said to me before you got on the train?" she asked, calmer now. "That I had to be strong? That I had to be there for Prim and not get sick again? It's the same for you now. You have to get out of the darkness, and come back to us. I know it's hard. I've been there myself, remember? But I did it, though, and you can do it to. You are strong. Stronger than me. So much stronger."

After a long pause, she said in a low but demanding voice, "I have a medicine… if…" I shook my head. "That's okay. I won't make you if you try. But if you're not out of this chair by tomorrow, I'll personally hold you down and force it down your throat."

The next day I stood up, went to the hall and found my father's old jacket. I wrapped it around my too-thin body, as a shield against the world, before I stepped out of the house. It was a sunny day, still hot.

I went through the Victor's Village and walked down the road leading into town. I was intending to go to the square, but my feet seemed to move on their own and I soon found myself walking in another direction. It wasn't long before I was standing inside my old house in the Seam. All our belongings were moved to our new house. It felt cold and empty. It didn't feel like home anymore.

I just stood there for a while. I was about to leave when I heard the hissing. There he was. Buttercup. As ugly as ever. He moved towards me, and hissed again. "Sorry, I don't have anything for you." I said in an unfriendly tone while waving him off. Stupid cat. I was about to leave a second time when I turned around and looked at him one more time. "I'll bring you something tomorrow… Promise."

Gale's house was not far away. Of course he wasn't home. It was a Wednesday, and he was working in the mines. Hazelle must have spotted me through the window. Before I could turn and walk away, she was outside, tugging me into a hug. She held me for a long time. When she pulled away, I could see tears forming in her eyes. She dragged me inside and pushed me down into a chair before setting a cauldron over the fire to heat water for tea.

"How are you?" she asked. I didn't answer. I didn't have an answer. Instead I asked her about how she was doing, and about the kids.

"It's been hard," she admitted. "After Gale started working in the mines, he hasn't had much time to hunt. It means less food, and Rory had to sign up for tesserae."

Her words were weighing down on me, and I felt awful, guilty. We both knew what Gale had been doing when he wasn't in the mines. He'd been with me, not in the woods hunting like he should have been.

"I'm sorry," I whispered at the table. I could see Hazelle was about to protest, but before she could say anything I dug a small purse full of money out of my pocket. I laid it on the table within her reach. Her eyes grew wide and she started to shake her head.

"Take it." I urged. "We have so much money now. We couldn't spend it all even if we tried. Please take it. Don't say anything to Gale, though. He wouldn't like it." She nodded once and took the purse, hiding it away in a drawer by the sink.

On my way home, I stopped by the Hob. The silence spread like wildfire when the people inside realized who had just stepped into their midst. I felt uneasy and was about to turn and leave when Greasy Sae caught my eye. She simply smiled at me before turning back to her conversation with Ripper. As if on cue, everyone else turned their attention away from me and back to what they had been doing. Soon conversation filled the room. Relief washed over me. I whispered a "thank you" under my breath as I bought a bowl of soup from Greasy Sae. I made sure to pay her more than what the soup was worth.

Some of the others came by while I was eating. Most of them I knew from years of trading in the Hob, but some I didn't recognize. They gave me a pat on the back or a squeeze of my hand, often followed by a "good to see you" or "you go, girl" or "I'm rooting for you." No one mentioned the Games or Peeta. It was as if they had all agreed not to speak about any of it for as long as I was around.

The only one that sat down to talk was Darius. He was his usual funny, joking self. He told a story of how he'd bought one pound of cheese from the goat man for a pin he said looked a lot like my mockingjay pin, even though it didn't really look like it at all. Greasy Sae sent him a warning look at the mention of something related to my part in the Games. I ignored it. I was just glad for Darius' relaxed, normal behavior, and my lips formed a real smile. I could not remember when my last real smile had been. When he jokingly asked to escort me home "because it's such an honor to be seen in the presence of a celebrity," I said yes. Not out of obligation or courtesy, but because I really wanted him to.

After that day, it went easier. It took a few more days before I went under the fence and into the forest for the first time. Another couple of days before I picked up my bow, and shot an arrow at a nearby tree.

The next Sunday I got up early, packed a bag with bread, cheese, sausages and some dried plums—enough food for two—and went out to the woods.

I sat at the usual spot where Gale and I used to meet. I don't know how long I waited. He came, silent as a wild animal, like only he could be. One moment I sat there alone, and the next he was there beside me.

"I came by your house, but you weren't there," he said, not looking at me, but out into the forest. "Your mother didn't know where you'd gone. I hoped I would find you here."

We didn't say much. We ate. We hunted for a while, but neither of us were focused on it. I just enjoyed the feeling of the forest around me. The sounds and the smells were so familiar to me. For the first time, I thought that maybe I could do it. That I could go on, and forget. Well, maybe not forget, but move on, at least.

It's been a couple of weeks since Gale and I had our first Sunday out in the woods. Although it gets easier day by day, I can't afford to think of Peeta and drown in the all-too-familiar darkness again. For now, I push the thoughts from my head. I know that one day I must face it. Not yet, though.

"Cinna called." I've just stepped into the hall when my mother pops her head out to greet me. "He wanted to talk to you. Something about starting to work on your talent."

"My talent?" Somewhere in the back of my mind, I remember Effie talking to me about finding a talent I could showcase on my Victory Tour. Supposedly, all victors have to have one. At the time, I'd ignored every word she said about the matter. I've dismissed every effort anyone has made on the subject since. But Cinna..?

"He asked me if I could tell you to call him."

"Yes. I'll do that." Talking to Cinna is actually an appealing thought. My mother seems a little surprised that it was so easy to convince me to do it. The look on her face tells me she thought she was up for a fight. I go straight to the matter at hand—the phone.

"Hello?" I can hear Cinna's familiar voice at the other end.

"It's Katniss…" I trail off. I'm not yet used talking to someone hundreds of miles away.

"Katniss, good you called. Your mother said you were out. Good, good. Very good." Oh, so he has also been informed of my less-than-capable state.

"I was thinking about how you're supposed to showcase a talent on your Victory Tour. I don't think hunting illegally will be a big hit here in the Capitol." That's Cinna, straight to the point. I like that. The world is full of too much chitchat anyway. "And I was thinking that maybe you could design clothes…?"

Design clothes? Me? I who, firstly, don't care about clothes one bit. As long as they fit and don't have too many holes, I'm happy. Secondly, I can neither draw nor sew, even if my life depended on it.

"I…I don't know…I..." I don't want to hurt Cinna by blurting out that I don't give a damn about clothes or designing them.

"Yes, yes. I know you're not really interested in it. It will just be for the cameras. I'll do the work. You just has to present it as yours."

I'm shocked. "You can't… I can't…."

"Of course you can! And as for me, I want to do it. You are, after all, my favorite little victor." I can almost hear the smile in his voice.

He talks me into it, of course. After all, it's more than I could have ever dreamed of. I now have something to show the Capitol. As a result, I am free to do what I want to do. Most of the time I spend in the woods. Another convenient side effect of the agreement is that I'll be talking regularly to Cinna, so he can update me on the process.

Days go by. I spend most of my time in the woods. The best days are Sundays, when Gale joins me. Most of the game we catch goes straight to his family. As I expected, he refuses to even hear about any kind of money, but at least he agrees to take the game.

I also spend a lot of time trading in or just hanging around the Hob. I like being there. They treat me almost like before the Games, especially Greasy Sae and Darius. I also start giving out some food and money to some of the families I know have problems keeping their bellies full.

It's getting colder day by day, and one morning I wake up to find a thin layer of snow covering the ground. It makes me uneasy for a number of reasons. It is a sign that winter is coming, and that the Victory Tour is closing in on me.