Prison Life

Summary: A glimpse of what Brendan's feeling when he was in prison. Xx

Chapter 1

Brendan POV

Sometimes I wonder if it was always meant to turn out this way, locked in a cell, falsely accused murderer, getting beaten up every day by Warren's men and then taking a shower to wash off the blood.

That's prison life, sure I guess for a fairy with no standards this would be a dream come true, surrounded by men, who all had desperate needs that could only be got rid of by sex.

But me, I'm not one of them, sure say what you like about me but I do have standards and I don't think they go by the name H.I.V.

I was training harder and harder every day to try and get strong enough to beat the men but there were two of them and twice the size... I had no chance.

My only escape and to get all this to stop would be if I gave the club over to Warren for free.

But my pride gets in the way; I cannot lose to Warren but what would be the prize if I win? A body bag?

I surprisingly don't have a lot of time to think because all that was constantly on my mind was, so when's the next beating gonna be? Sorry I'm booked for lunch but maybe some other time?

I learned from my father that you don't let people mess you about, you make them pay, put them in line when they cross it but never under any circumstance hurt a women. I wouldn't dream of it.

Lynsey and Cheryl have visited a few times, each time I'd look worse than the last. The cuts getting deeper and bluer; and the look in my sister's eyes broke my heart.

I hate seeing her like that, and the reason being me, just makes me feel a thousand times worse.

Then there was Lynsey shouting the odds, telling me I was just like Silas and even giving me a chess board for god's sake.

For saying that I was the only one that stood by her and believed her, I haven't exactly got much in return, sorry other than a sentence of killing young girls.

But I guess what hurts the most is that people actually believed I could hurt a woman, one person more that the rest.

Stephen.

He hasn't visited me, not that I'd actually want to see him exactly but just for him to ask or something... I don't know.

He thought I was capable of killing Rae; I get where he's coming from completely but now that Silas has been charged of the murders does he not even feel a little bad?

Does he care?

Do I care if he cares?

Maybe.

But like I said he doesn't want to know and by this time he's probably got a new fella on the go, playing happy families and if I get out of here the cycle starts again.

It keeps me awake at night thinking what I'm going through right now is a lot like what I was doing to him.

But I'm too far gone now and I can't change.

Revenge is plotting in my head as we speak, no matter how much people will hate me and be disappointed with me and maybe even hurt somebody, I cannot let Warren Fox win or I may as well hide in shame.

I stand up and throw my shirt to the floor as my two 'good friends' walk into my cell ready for my next beating.

"I was beginning to think you boys had forgotten about me." I sooth slowly, before going all around mental and throwing myself at them, I got in a few punches but I'm the one that'll get hurt.

I'm getting used to this now and I may as well give up.

I wish I could change things, change me, and let's face it if I wasn't... sleeping with men I wouldn't have got into this mess.

Rae might not have been dead, she'd have Stephen for a start, Declan wouldn't have found out anything and I wouldn't have threatened Rae.

I've always said my life style is disgusting and sickening and I guess me going into prison and getting beat up is what I deserve, its knocking some sense into me...

A/N Yeah I wouldn't like to think this was what was going through his head but... it might since he is coming out mental... anyway hope you like my ONESHOT, please review. Xx